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The Ultimate Pep Talk for Talking to Your Crush


We get it: There are few things more terrifying than getting up the nerve to talk to your crush. What if he or she is sitting with friends and they start giggling to one another? What if you have food on your face? What if you freeze up and break out in hives?!

But what if none of that happens and it ends up being the start of something amazing?

Collegiettes, there are only a finite number of opportunities you will have to interact with that guy or girl you’ve been crushing on since freshman year, so make the most of them! To help you work up the courage to go talk to your crush, Her Campus is here to give you five reasons you need to hurry up and get your flirt on.

1. Your crush might be thinking the same thing

So you’re sitting there in the dining hall, ogling the hottie on the soccer team at the next table over, trying to convince yourself it’s a good idea to go say “hi.” But what if he or she is thinking the very same thing? Contrary to popular belief, not all guys (or girls) are straightforward when it comes to love, and your crush could be feeling just as nervous and vulnerable as you are.

Unless one of you breaks the stalemate, you could be doomed to googly-eye each other around campus until you graduate. Instead, do yourself a favor and ask your crush how classes are going or how the soccer team is doing this season next time you see him or her. Even if your crush isn’t interested in a relationship, you’ll never have to wonder “What if?”

2. You owe it to yourself to try

You’re a beautiful, smart, strong collegiette, and you deserve to pursue the things you want… right? Chances are if you’re avoiding your crush, you’re doing so because you’re insecure about yourself or about how he or she will react. You know Queen Bey would never think that way, so channel your inner Sasha Fierce and realize what a catch you are!

3. Your crush could think you’re not interested

While pop culture might try to convince you otherwise, guys are sensitive, too! If you never speak to your crush and never approach him, how is he even supposed to know you like him? Even if your crush isn’t into you right now, acting completely disinterested definitely won’t help your case.

A crush is unlikely to make the first move unless you show at least some hint of interest, so muster up the courage to flash your best smile or ask your crush about your history reading. We’re definitely not advocating that you profess your love to your crush in the middle of the quad, but subtle hints that you like him or her as more than just a friend are all it takes to send the message.

4. You have nothing to lose

So let’s say you’re at a party and your friends finally convince you to go say hi to that cutie you’ve been crushing on for a year. Let’s say things don’t go quite as you had hoped, and your witty banter and carefree confidence is replaced by stilted awkwardness and stale beer. Not to worry, because you really haven’t lost anything!

Unless you point-blank ask your crush on a date, chances are he or she will just think you’re being friendly at a party! Guys are typically a little slow to pick up on signals from women, so the “really awkward” thing you said probably didn’t even register with him. Interacting with your crush can actually be super low risk, as long as you stick to friendly topics to gauge his interest rather than overly flirty banter. You’ll not only make your crush feel at ease, but you’ll also minimize any potential embarrassment on your end. And, at the very least, you’ll probably gain a great new friend—and who knows, maybe something will happen down the road!

5. It could be the start of something amazing

Ah, the promise of love. At the end of the day, this will probably be the thing that gets you up off your butt and talking to your crush. While many crushes don’t work out for whatever reason, there are tons of relationships that do! In fact, pretty much every single relationship (from Barack and Michelle Obama to your best friend and her SO) started out as just a crush until someone made a move.

Yes, your crush might not be interested. Yes, he or she could “friend zone” you or turn out to be different than you thought, but your crush could also turn out to be even better than you had imagined. Don’t rule out the possibility of happily ever after just because you’re scared of what might happen if you put yourself out there!

Take a deep breath, channel your inner Yoncé and go talk to that hottie you’ve had your eye on; you have nothing to lose! Now get flirting, girl.

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