13 Sarcastic Campus Cuties

Name: Sylven Yacas

School: VCU

Year: Sophomore

Name: Matt Rozzana

School: UC Riverside

Describe yourself in 3 words: Kind, Thoughtful, and Sarcastic.

Tell me one interesting or weird thing about yourself. I watch movies so many times I can recite at least one scene from every movie I've ever seen.

What's your favorite movie? The Wizard of Oz.

And your favorite food? Chicken Parmesan.

So what's the perfect date night for you? Disney movie marathon with In-N-Out.

And what you look for in a partner? Someone with a sense of humor and a drive

And what's the ultiamte deal breaker for you? Cheating.

Name: Andrew Hartley

School: C Mich

Hometown: Riverview, MI

Age: 20

Major: Accounting

Relationship Status: Taken

If you were stranded on an island, what three things would you bring?

Beer, a raft, and Flamin’ Hot Cheetos.

Boxers or Briefs?

Boxer briefs.

Where is your favorite place to hang out on campus?

South Point because that’s where the party’s at.

Blondes or Brunettes?

Blondes.

What is the craziest thing you have ever done?

Getting drunk with my friends in Detroit parking garages.

What qualities do you admire in the opposite sex?

Honesty, intelligent, funny, sarcastic, and good-looking.

What is your favorite movie:

The Departed because Jack Nicholson is a legend.

Any awesome or hidden talents:

I can play the piano.

What is your ideal or dream date?

Dinner at a sweet Italian restaurant because I love Italian food, and then a Red Wings game in the club suites.

Who is your Hollywood crush?

Rachel McAdams because she’s gorgeous.

Name: Kieran Crew

School: Bournemouth

Course and year: BA Business Studies, first year

Home town: Bristol

Relationship status: Single 

Describe yourself in 3 words... Outgoing, funny and sarcastic

If you could be any animal, what would it be and why? I would want to be a lion, because I'm a predator...

Tell me about your most embarrassing moment! I drank too much on the first night of freshers which caused me to have major beer goggles!

What are you scared of? Boscombe! 

Best night out in Bournemouth? Lost Garden on a Monday

Where are we likely to find you? Cranborne House or pretty much all around Bournemouth. Definitely at the beach if it's sunny! 

What would your ideal date entail? Urban Reef, balcony, beach view, three course meal and cider (Thatchers!)

Best moment of uni so far? Last weekend, because all my female flat mates went home! 

What is your worst habit? Sexist banter...

What is your favourite song? Dancing In The Moonlight by Toploader 

Are you a boobs, bum or legs man? All of them, must be a 10/10! 

Why should a girl date you? Why not?! I'm joking...

Name: Dan Banks

School: UT

Age: 21 

Classification: Junior

Hometown: Suffield, Connecticut 

Major: Business Management 

Relationship status: Single, but on the prowl!

Favorite pick-up line: “Roses are red, violets are blue.. please love me!”

Music taste: Folk rock; favorite band is Fleetwood Mac

Who is a person you admire?: “My grandfather because he joined the military and started a life for himself at a young age. He also overcame the struggles of poverty and now has his own company.”

Who is your celebrity crush?: “Definitely, Blake Lively.”

Best feature a girl can have: “Pretty eyes are a great physical feature, but she also has to be spontaneous and affectionate. Definitely, not someone who is high maintenance.” 

Favorite place to go in Tampa: Oxford Exchange and Yard of Ale 

Plans after graduating: “After graduating I want to take time and travel around South America. After that, I plan to move back home and work for the family business, which is a golf course.”

Five words to describe yourself: Sarcastic, easy-going, motivated, ignorant, and extremely sexy 

Most embarrassing moment:  “The most embarrassing moment happened when I was at the Ritz Carlton. I was running through the lobby in my birthday suit.. if you know what I mean.”

Name: Kyle Hutchinson
School: U Maine
Hometown: Dixfield, ME
Relationship Status: Single
Sign: Aquarius

Twitter? Maybe someday

Campus Life
Major: Premed/ Biology
Favorite thing about UMaine: The people.
How are you involved on campus:  Beta Theta Pi
Favorite place to eat in Orono: The Roost
Campus posse (name some friends):  Nick Woods, Ryan Hall, Brandon Jonaitis, John Fassak.

Best place to meet girls at UMaine: At the library, obviously.

Why did you choose UMaine: Great Parking

Best Professor: Brian Olsen

Best Class: Medical Physiology
Worst Class: Organic Chem
How do you like to spend your weekends here: Out with friends

Miscellaneous
What is on your ipod's top rated: Timeflies Tuesday/ Macklemore
Boxers or Briefs: Boxerbriefs
An embarrassing confession: I buy women’s shaving cream.

Guilty Pleasure: Strawberritas
Ski or Snowboard: Snowboard
Salty or Sweet: Sweet
Cats or Dogs:  Dogs
Dream job: Pediatric Oncologist
Biggest Pet Peeve: Bad Tippers

Favorite Charity: Boys and Girls Club
Three words to describe yourself: Crazy, Sarcastic, Honest

Favorites
Favorite song to dance to at a party: And We Danced- Macklemore & Ryan Lewis
Favorite food: Chinese
Favorite Beer: Pumpkinhead
Favorite App (game or otherwise): Snapchat

Pick up line: Do you sleep on your stomach? Oh, can I?

The Nitty Gritty
Craziest place you've ever had sex: Dorm Showers

 How do you let someone know you're interested in them: I poke her on Facebook
What do you look for in a girl: A sense of humor
Deal-breaker: Overbearing

Celebrity Girl Crush: Kate Upton
Celebrity Man Crush: Ryan Reynolds

Name: Piotr Jurgielewicz

School: Drexel 

Birthday: August 3

Age: 20

Year: Pre-Junior (2015) 

Major: Biology

Hometown: Suwalki, Poland

Relationship Status: Taken

Astrological Sign: Leo

Hobbies/interests: Hiking, photography, and music.

What clubs/organizations are you a part of on campus? Polish Club, Alpha Pi Lambda, and I work at the writing center.

Biggest turn-on: Dark skin.

Advice you would give a girl trying to impress you: Be yourself.

Celebrity Crush: Scarlett Johansson

Three words you’d use to describe yourself: Sarcastic, uhm, I need two more words? Adventurous! And…ambitious.

Future career goals/ambitions: Pediatrician

If you had to pick a song to be the theme song of your life, what would it be: It’s My Life – Bon Jovi

Most embarrassing song on your iTunes: Hips Don’t Lie by Shakira

Favorite movie quote: “That's when you know you've found somebody special. When you can just shut the fuck up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence.” Pulp Fiction

Guilty pleasure: Game of Thrones

Best pick-up line: If I were an enzyme I’d be helicase, so I could unzip your jeans.

What is something most of Drexel doesn’t know about you: I never went to 5^th grade.

Why did you not go to 5^th grade?: When I moved from Poland the middle school was closer than the elementary school.

What’s something on your Drexel bucket list: Get better at rock climbing!

Name: Jesse Cohen

School: PSU

Major: Energy Engineering

Hometown: Lower Merion, PA

Year: Junior

JC: I look for a good sense of humor, daddy problems, a girl that doesn’t care about size, a girl who pulls out her wallet after dinner, and leaves the door open when she pees.

HC: Who’s your celebrity crush?

JC: Adele, that’s a real woman.

HC: What are 3 things you cannot live without?

JC: My dog, my “Hey Girl” Ryan Gosling diary, and Charmin Ultra Soft.

HC: If your life had a theme song what would it be?

JC: It Wasn’t Me – Shaggy

HC: Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

JC: Paraguay.

HC: Give me your best pick up line?

JC: My breath smells really bad in the morning. You wanna sleep over?

HC: What’s your favorite penn state memory and why?

JC: When I fell in love with an exotic dancer, Kylie, at The End Zone. I know my mom would really like her.

Name: Kacey Lopez

School: Point Park

Age: 21

Year: Senior

Hometown: South Brunswick, NJ

Major: Photography

Activities/involvement on campus: Action Sports Club

Relationship status: Single

Sign: Pisces

Hobbies/interests: Photography, skateboarding/snowboarding, sleeping, showering, and consuming

Hidden talent: Lucid dreaming

Dream job: Astronaut/space explorer

Life motto: Hakuna Matata

Boxers or briefs: Boxer briefs

Favorite movie: Cool Runnings

Favorite music: If you loved music like I do, you would not have a consistent preference

Favorite teams: USA, Canada

Celeb crush: Alice Eve

Biggest turn on: Wit

Biggest turn off: Ignorance

Ideal date: Scuba diving in Mexico

Fun fact: NASA’s New Horizons mission is scheduled to arrive at Pluto in 2015. From there, it might be able to penetrate the mysterious Kuiper Belt, where no spacecraft  has gone before!

If you could be any fictional character, who would it be and why? Deadpool because of his accelerated healing factor and hand-to-hand combat skills

If you could travel anywhere in the world, where and why? I’d really like to snowboard in the Swiss Alps

Well ladies, if you like outer space & action sports, this suave and sarcastic cutie might be the guy for you! Keep an eye out for Kacey on campus. 

Name: Matt Sarcona 

School: SJU

Where from? Northport Long Island

Studying? IHS major

What do you want to be when you grow up? Physical therapist

Activities on campus? Lacrosse is my only activity cause it takes up so much time.

Three words to describe yourself? Smart, sarcastic, and compassionate.

What do you look for in a girl? I look for a girl that has a good personality and can cook me big delicious meals.

Celeb crush? Selena Gomez

Something you love about girls? I like that girls entertain me.

Something you don’t understand about girls? I will never understand anything about girls even though I try to..

What makes you happiest? I’m happiest when I’m playing golf.

Something on your bucket list? I’d like to climb Mount Everest.

What’s your personal style? My personal style is wearing whatever is most comfortable and generally I wear a hat.

What do you like that girls wear? I like when girls, especially April Savarese wear high waisted jeans.

Favorite movie? Wall-e

Ideal first date? An ideal first date would involve an aquarium and pizza as well as a long walk on the beach.

Name: Brian Story

School: Eckerd

Graduation Year: 2015

Hometown: Phoenixville, PA

Relationship Status: Single

Major: Creative Writing

Three words to describe yourself? Quirky, serious, sarcastic

Who is your Celebrity Crush? Honestly I have no clue. 

What is your Biggest Turn Off? Self centered people in general

Favorite qualities in a girl? Independent, likes to hang outside, goofy sense of humor

Dream Car? Aston Martin V12 Vantage

Favorite Spot On Campus? I’m gonna have to say waterfront

What’s your idea of a perfect first date? I've never gone paintballing, but I think it would be really awesome to do that.

Most Awkward Romantic Experience? I’ve had a dad walk in on me. That was bad. 

Favorite Campus Event? Probably Another Man’s Trash shows. 

Why do you think you are a campus cutie? Frankly I have no clue; I must have a lot of people fooled.

Favorite pick up line? Rule: One just does not use pick up lines.

Favorites
Favorite food:  Ethiopian cuisine
Favorite movie: Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Favorite TV show: Tied between Top Gear and How I Met Your Mother
Favorite book: Cider House Rules by John Irving
Favorite animal: I’m gonna have to go with a mutt or rather mixed breed type of dog

Name: Dom Belcher

School: Bournemouth

Course and year: BAMMJ, first year

Hometown: Witney, in Oxford

Relationship Status: Single

Do you have a nickname? Well, Dom I suppose, although it’s an abbreviation of my actual name! Back home, I occasionally got called Maynard, as the guys thought I looked like Conor Maynard without my glasses on!

What are three words to describe you? Creative, outgoing and then probably sarcastic

What hobbies or activities do you take part in? Play guitar, sing a little, play football and squash

Are there any societies that you are a part of? I present a radio show for Nerve media

Where are we most likely to find you? Either Dylan’s, at my flat playing guitar, or possibly down Sharkeys playing Pool!

Favourite place to go on a night out? TOAST! Halo has been decent, too, though!

Favourite place to get food after a wild night out? Ermm, I think Subway surprisingly!?

What has been your best moment of uni so far? Being put to bed as a half-naked drunk cowboy on my 19th birthday -- although the morning after wasn’t so good!

What would be your ideal date? I like home-cooking, but other than making dinner for a girl, probably go for a few drinks in a nice bar like Sixty Million Postcards.

Give us your best chat up line?! Have you got a map? Because I’m lost in your eyes. Haha not that I’ve used that line yet or anything.

What do you have to offer for the ladies of Bournemouth? Hopefully lots of laughs, a good group of people to hang out with, someone who can cook, loves music, and I don’t take myself too seriously – that’s what I can offer!

Are you a boobs, bum or leg man? Tough call … probably a legs man!

Name: Liam Yates

School: Bournemouth

Course and year: BA Business Studies, first year

Home town: Trowbridge

Relationship status: Single

Do you have a nickname? Yes, my friends at home call me 'Yahtzee', I'm not quite sure why, it just stuck!

How would your friends describe you? Intelligent, sarcastic, generous and active

Where are we likely to find you? At the football pitches and occasionally out in the clubs

What has been your favourite moment of uni so far? Getting into the varsity Futsal team

What type of girl do you go for? I don't really have a 'type', anything goes!

Ok, so what do you look for in a girl? Initially, physical attractiveness, but they also have to be able to hold a mature conversation!

What would be your ideal date? A crazy night in! I'd cook, we'd watch a film, then maybe have a cheeky spoon...

What is your favourite restaurant in Bournemouth? The Print Room is the best place I've eaten

What is your drink of choice? Water! Although I am partial to the odd jager bomb

Give us your best chat up line! Grab your coat, you've pulled!

What are your plans for after uni? To get a successful job in London and do a bit of travelling, possibly in Africa, Australia or America

What do you have to offer the ladies of Bournemouth? Charm, fun and a kind heart