Many trans* women wait until college to come out because they're away from home and all their peers from the judge-y days of high school. But what's a trans* collegiette to do when she’s finally able to express herself and her old wardrobe just will no longer do? She goes shopping! Here are some shopping tips and tricks for trans* women.

1. Shoes

You can search through the racks at Payless all you want, but the only heels you're gonna find in a size 12 are two-inch-tall pumps in the most gorgeous shade of baby-poop green. Finding cute shoes in large sizes can be a nightmare, but thanks to companies likeDoreen Fashions and Janet's Closet that make shoes specifically designed for trans* women, the nightmarish terror of shoe shopping can be a much more pleasant experience.

Before venturing out, make sure you know your size. If you're brand new to shopping for women's shoes and you don't know what size you are, just add two sizes to your men's shoe size and you should be good to go.

Where to get shoes

For those fortunate trans* women with "average-size" feet, any old shoe store will do. But for the more well-endowed girls out there,Long Tall Sally sells them up to a size 14 and Zappos goes up to a whopping size 20. 

Other options

If you can't find one of these stores near you and shopping online isn't an option, there are a few nifty little tricks for expanding smaller shoes to fit your feet. Shoe expanders can widen and lengthen your shoes to make them fit your feet better without the uncomfortable hassle of breaking them in. You can get them on Amazon for around $20.

All you have to do is stick the shoe expander inside your too-small shoe, crank it until it's stretching the shoe out a little bit, then leave it overnight. The shoes should fit better by the next morning.

Feel like getting even more DIY-savvy? You can create your own expander by filling sandwich bags with water, sticking them in your shoes and putting the shoes in the freezer for a few days.

2. Underwear

For trans* women, finding pretty underwear can be a hassle since most panties are made for women with different parts down there. They also tend to sit awkwardly on hips that aren't quite as wide as the "birthing hips" of a cisgender woman. Luckily, with the help of a few tricks, you can smooth things out and get the hips and butt of your dreams.

Padded panties

If you're looking to accentuate your hips and derriere to create the illusion of a more feminine figure, padded underwear may be a viable option for you. Several brands like Bubbles Bodywear and Lingerie Solutions make underwear with built-in pads to create the illusion of fuller buttocks and hips. You can also buy them at Walmart for $10.94!

Homemade hip pads

For the gal on a budget who can't afford a new wardrobe of booty panties and doesn't want her butt to go from fab to flat on a regular basis, you can fashion your own reusable hip and butt pads out of cushion pads from the craft store or even discarded couch cushions.

The first step is to make a template. You can do this by measuring the length and width of the area of your body you want to pad and then drawing it out on a piece of paper. Generally, hip pads should be the shape of Africa. Next, cut out the template shape in the cushion pad and trim it so that it fits well against the curvature of your body. It's okay if there are some lumps and bumps; just wear shapewear and/or pantyhose when you wear the hip pads to smooth everything out and make it look more natural. 

Underwear specifically for trans* women

The Breast Form Store makes a lot of products for trans* women, including a line of exclusive, custom gaffs and tucking panties. Chrysalis Lingerie is a store made by trans* women for trans* women with an impressive range of panties designed for pre-op trans* ladies.

For girls on a budget, tucking panties are often on the expensive side, so a tight women's bikini bottom can be used to achieve the same effect.

3. Makeup

HRT (hormone replacement therapy) will redistribute fat deposits in your face over time to give you a more feminine appearance along with softening the skin and making it more clear (awesome, right?), but it can't do anything to change your bone structure. In fact, the only way to really change your bone structure is surgery, which is pretty drastic. However, when applied correctly, the right makeup can make your bone structure look totally different without the price (and pain) of surgery.

Makeup is not a necessity by any stretch, and many trans* women are the picture of womanhood without any makeup at all, but if you do want to enhance your femininity, it can be a useful tool.

Sally Smith*, a fourth-year student from the University of Central Florida and an HRT-using makeup guru, gave us an awesome step-by-step guide for trans* women for how to make your face appear more feminine. Here are some of her tips:

Contouring

According to Sally, "cream products are your best friends. NARS Multiples ($39 each) are a great option.”

In order to contour your face, “use a darker cream in the shadows of your face, a lighter shade in on the high points and then, using a beauty blender or stippling brush, begin blending a light BB cream ($7.44) on top of the highlighted areas first and then the contoured areas to give a natural, 'maybe-she's-born-with-it' look to the face,” Sally says.

Eyebrows

When doing your eyebrows, Sally says it’s important to follow your natural brow.

“Fill in, don't reconstruct. The goal is to refine and emphasize what you have,” she says. “Go get them professionally shaped. I find that a less-arched brow looks better on women with harsher features because it softens the face.”

To fill in her eyebrows, Sally says she uses “an angled brush ($3) and Anastasia's dipbrow pomade ($18)."

Other makeup tips

For your eyelashes, “load them up with a few coats of L'Oreal Telescopic Carbon Black [Mascara] ($10.59) (my tried and true) and skip the eye shadow,” Sally says. “The bigger the lashes, the bigger your eyes look.”

Overall, Sally says to keep your makeup natural and try not to overcompensate. “Keep makeup simple for everyday,” she says. “You don't need to spend hours to look beautiful when you already do naturally.”

4. Bras

There's a long list of things cisgender girls are taught at a young age that trans* women often don't learn until later in life. Finding your proper bra size is one of those things! Here’s how to make sure you get the right one.

Professional fittings

Getting a professional bra fitting can be nerve-wracking, especially for trans* women, considering all the horror stories floating around (such as Kylie Jack being denied a bra fitting at Petticoat Fair in Austin, Texas).

If you're looking for a trans*-friendly place to get a professional bra fitting, Victoria's Secret is a good bet.

DIY fittings

Fortunately, professional bra fittings aren't totally necessary since you can do your own fitting at home as long as you know how. Erin Lucombe, a former Victoria's Secret employee, shares her knowledge of bra fittings so girls can do them from the comfort of their own homes:

“Bring the measuring tape across your back at bra-band level under each arm and measure just above your bust,” Lucombe says. “The resulting number is the band size. If the number is odd, round down to the closest number. For bust measurement, bring the measuring tape across your back under each arm and measure around the fullest part of the bust. Leave a half-inch between the tape and bust. This is your bust measurement."

Once you have your band and bust measurement, the difference between those two numbers will give you your cup size. One inch is an A cup, two inches is a B cup and so on. Tack your cup size onto your band size, and viola! Your bra size.

"We recommend you get refitted every six months because cup size and band width can change depending on if you have gained or lost any weight,” Lucombe says.

The right bra for you

Bras come in about as many shapes and sizes as people do–maybe more. There are floppy bras, sexy bras, good-old trusty bras and even bras that can make your boobs look three times their size.

If you're new to HRT, don't spend too much on a bra, because your breasts will continue to increase in size and you'll just have to keep getting new ones. It's impossible to tell how long it will really take for your breasts to grow, because some trans* women start noticing growth after just a few months of HRT, and some are on it for five years or more before they even get to an A cup. Just be patient and keep track of your breast growth to make sure you continue to wear proper-fitting bras.

Most superstores have bras for low prices. Walmart carries bras starting for as low as $3.98, and Target has them for $7.48, which is still much cheaper than what you would find at Victoria's Secret or other lingerie stores. If you feel comfortable with it, you can even ask your friends for some hand-me-downs. Lots of girls have bras lying around that they've grown out of!

Other options

If you're not happy with the final size HRT makes your breasts, you still have options. Of course you can get breast augmentation surgery, but another solution is to get a breast form or a padded bra. Plenty of stores like The Breast Form Store and Make Me Heal design breast forms and special bras for trans* women as well as drag queens and cis women who have had mastectomies.

5. Skirts/Dresses

We've discussed how to feminize your face, but what about your body? According to our lovely Sally Smith, who gave us that awesome contour and highlight guide, HRT can help a lot.

"From personal experience, I went from straight as a board to having Victoria's-Secret-Angel proportions, so you just have to let the hormones do their thing and accentuate what you have until you're noticeably more hourglass-shaped," she says.

HRT results have been known to vary, however, so if you aren't filling out the way you'd like to, fear not! We can all look like Marilyn Monroe with the right clothes. You can get the appearance of a more feminine figure by wearing skirts and dresses that accentuate your hips and cinch in your waist.

"The biggest and best tip I was ever given was to wear flowy dresses, like summer dresses or skater dresses, that have a lot of fabric in the skirt,” says trans* performer and Katy Perry impersonator Sara Andrews. “They're perfect for girls like us because you don't have to worry about your tuck!"

Types of skirts

Not only are skater skirts and dresses fantastic for hiding certain areas, they're also great for creating that oh-so-popular hourglass figure. They cinch in the waist and flare out at the hips, making them flattering on all body types. If you're apple shaped or rectangle shaped, a skater skirt will do wonders to define your waist, and if you're triangle shaped or inverted-triangle shaped, it will even out your bust-to-hip ratio.

Just watch out when it comes to tighter-fitting skirts; they can create some unwanted lumps and bumps. Not to mention they're notorious for making big butts look too big and small butts look flat.

Where to get them

American Apparel has skater skirts and dresses in varying lengths and almost every color under the sun. They're also famously trans* friendly and even hired trans* woman model Isis King for an ad campaign! If you're looking for something on the cheaper side, Forever 21 is a go-to store for college girls on a budget. They have a phenomenal selection of flowy skirts and dresses for cheap prices. Forever 21 also has a plus-size section so you voluptuous babes can find clothes that emphasize your natural curves.

Keep in mind that what may work for one girl might not work for another, and obviously there are oodles more tricks for creating a more feminine appearance. But here's the most important tip of them all: Don't feel pressured to conform to society's standards of femininity. All the tips listed above are only for those who want to follow them. If you're not going for an hourglass figure or a busty torso, then by all means, more power to you! You can be as feminine, masculine or androgynous as you choose, so don't let anyone tell you that you have to do otherwise!

*Name has been changed.

Attention all collegiettes from coast to coast! Interested in a career in tech? Hearing the siren call of the Silicon Valley whenever you think about your future? We’ve got the trip of a lifetime in store for you!

Her Campus has teamed up with General Assembly to send one lucky winner and a friend to Silicon Valley for an insider's look at the upper echelons of the tech world! Meet CEOs and top execs from Pinterest, LinkedIn, Twitter, Chegg and Y Combinator; tour their campuses and enjoy the best of the Bay Area with a $1,000 Uber credit and a stay at the luxury Hotel Zetta!

Enter HERE for your chance to get inspired by the Bay Area tech scene! Don’t miss out on this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to get your foot in the industry door and fly for free to the Silicon Valley!

When you first arrive, college can seem like a total zoo. There are countless types of people you’ve never seen before, each more ridiculous than the last, and, without a keen discerning eye, it can be impossible to distinguish between the lions and the leeches of college life. But even though there are thousands of students on your college campus, there are 10 people that you’ll meet within your first week, without a doubt. These 10 species are present on every single campus across America, and, if you can spot them quickly, you can learn to navigate the wild safari of college life like it’s a petting zoo. Her Campus is here to help you classify the 10 people you meet in college — see if you can find any of these creatures on your campus!

1. The Future Master of the Universe

For these students, college is just a stop on the way to The Real World, and a career in finance, business, medicine or law. They can’t be bothered with such petty concerns as class, parties and campus events when they have a future to create. They’ll spend every waking moment talking about the internships they’ve applied for, comparing GPA’s and poring over grad-school acceptance books. Every weekend, they jet off to the city for interviews, missing all the fun of college on the way. You’ll see them strolling around campus in three-piece suits and furiously emailing on their smart phones while balancing Venti black coffees. Look out for them in business or pre-law frats, on the board of the Inter-Fraternity Council or in Student Government. And watch out for these slippery characters in class — they may never attend, participate or pay attention, but they’ll find a way to get all the notes and study their butts off, until they can walk away with the “A” that will buy them a ticket straight to Goldman Sachs.

2. The Environmentalist

This ubiquitous species, formerly known as “tree-huggers” and now known as “green” or “sustainable," wants YOU to know the Inconvenient Truth of climate change. They’re not satisfied with carrying around their name-brand eco-friendly water-bottles or designer reusable grocery bags; they need to get the entire campus to take action. They will not rest in their journey toward a “greener future," lobbying, campaigning and generally shaming everyone on campus into ditching the Easy Mac for locally grown, organic produce and powering our rooms with wind energy. This person has a cause to promote, and they’ll never let you forget it. You will see them EVERYWHERE — posting flyers all over the quad, writing impassioned guest columns for your school newspaper and using every available second of class time to garner support. You’ll find them in the Environmental Club, at the local food co-op or farmer’s market and at Starbucks, plotting their crusade on our nation’s carbon footprint over $4 lattés in disposable paper cups.

3. The Vampire

This guy may live on your floor, but you probably won’t see him after the first-night getting-to-know-you meeting. He’s almost always either pre-med, an engineer, an architecture student or a computer science major, and he will NEVER leave his room if he can help it. His blinds will always be down, his room will always be silent as a tomb (except the constant sound of clicking keys), and after a few weeks, a strange smell may start emanating from under the door (when you’re that busy, who has time for cleaning or laundry?). He exists solely off Pop-Tarts and Red Bull, and it’s impossible to tell whether he ever sleeps. If you’re lucky, you may see him venture out of his lair, but he will invariably have a 7 a.m. lab or a project that keeps him at the studio until the wee hours of the morning, so it will be tough to catch a glimpse of this elusive species.

4. The Sorority Clone

This girl is very rarely seen without at least two or three others just like her, eating salads at the dining hall or walking in a herd, talking and texting at the same time. She lives in a uniform: black leggings, flats, and a hoodie emblazoned with her sorority’s letters (and in the winter, a puffy down coat). She will NEVER go anywhere alone — she won’t sign up for a class unless she knows a friend will be taking it too; she won’t show up to a meal without an entourage; and she’ll roll up to the library in a car full of five other sisters. If you sit behind a bunch of Sorority Clones in class, you’ll be deafened by the incessant clicking of their cell-phone keys and their hushed conversations about formals, mixers, and “drama". Her favorite words are “legitimately,"“actually," and “honestly", and she uses them to emphasize every observation she makes, no matter how mundane (“This is honestly the fattiest fat-free Italian dressing I’ve ever had, legitimately.”) Get her on her own and she may be able to snap out of it, but only if she can manage to tear her eyes away from her BBMs.

5. The Irono-clast

This student, almost always an art, history, philosophy or English major, is just a little bit too cool for you. He wears sweater vests, bow ties, boat shoes and horn-rimmed glasses, but only because they’re retro. His favorite word is “ironic," and he uses it to great effect in class, just to let everyone know that nothing he says is meant to be taken entirely seriously. He’s been watching Mad Men since the first season, unlike the rest of us, and he USED to listen to Vampire Weekend before it got way too mainstream. He probably writes for the arts section of your school newspaper, or else he contributes esoteric poems to a campus literary journal, so he can say he’s a published writer. Look for him, not in Starbucks, but in an underground, little-known organic coffee shop, where he’ll probably be discussing the finer points of Keats or else tweeting constantly from his smartphone. 

6. The Great Participator

You’ll remember this student in every single class you take. Great Participators have an answer, comment or opinion for every question, whether right or wrong. They’ll keep their hands up for so long they’ll have body-builder-toned arms, and they’ll go off on so many tangents they’ll sound like they’re getting over a case of mono. If they’re a member of any gender, cultural, political or geographical group, they will always find a way to tie any point made in class to their background — “As a _____, I can personally relate to the readings because of the author’s sense of ______.” They will make the same point several times in a class period, and vary only slightly from that point throughout the semester. If anyone else makes a point, they’ll be sure to one-up you with their personal opinion, whether or not it has anything to do with what has just been said. But as much as they participate, they may not be so outgoing outside of the classroom — this is often a girl or guy you’ll see acting perfectly normal, even shy, in social situations or at a dorm meeting, and they can even be the person sitting alone at the dining hall, reading the newspaper and enjoying a solitary sandwich.

7. The Athlete Adonis

These guys and girls are the A-List celebs of any college campus. They’re your newspapers’ bold-faced names, your stadium headliners, your paparazzi targets. Between their jam-packed season schedules and their godlike status on campus, to see one up close is as exciting as running into the entire cast of Gossip Girl on the street. No matter the time of day or year, they will be wearing their sports uniforms or warm-ups, and you’ll never see them without an embroidered gym bag — in your school’s colors, of course. If a few live on your floor, you may get the distinct insider privilege of befriending a member of the game-day glitterati, in which case you will become the envy of all your friends (and maybe score a few sold-out tickets!) These gods and goddesses not only have their own teams, schedules, and wardrobes, but they have their own houses and parties too. If you’re able to score a coveted invite to a basketball party or a blowout at the hockey house, you know you’ve moved up into the upper echelon of college society. If you’re looking to sight one of these sparkly celebs, start hanging out at your campus gym, be sure to frequent the sportiest, frattiest bars in town, and take big introductory classes — you’re bound to find a few sitting together in the back.

8. The Creep

You’ll mostly see this guy at an open frat party, snaking their arms around girls from behind and grinding with them without any invitation. He’s of an unidentifiable age, and he might not even go to your school — but if anyone asks, he’s a junior. No matter what. He could be a 24-year-old financial analyst who’s visiting his old frat house, or a 17-year-old townie from the local high school, but he will insist up and down that he’s a junior in X frat, and all the guys at the party are “his boys." He’ll offer to buy you a drink, hound you for your number, and invite you up to “his place” (which could very well not be his place at all).  If you make the regrettable mistake of succumbing to a Creep’s advances, you won’t be able to get away ‘til he sticks his slimy tongue down your throat, and if you go home with him, you’ll need to ignore his sketchy 1 a.m. texts for weeks to shake him. Avoid this type at all costs — he’s the guy at the party wearing a white track jacket, with spiked hair and a chin strap, carrying two drinks — one for him and one for his prey.

9. The Floor Mayor

This eager-beaver species is obsessed with rounding up your floor for get-togethers. The first week this is nice — after all, you may not have a set social group yet, and the Mayor’s always looking for a group to go on a party-crawl. But after a few weeks he can get pretty annoying, when you’re trying to study at 11 p.m. on a Wednesday and the Mayor’s screaming through the halls that “everyone on this floor is so BORING!” And while it’s fun to get close with your floor, by no means should your dorm-mates be your only social circle, and the Mayor appears to have no friends outside of your R.A.’s domain. It can get kind of awkward when he appears at your door every Friday night, rounding up the troops for a floor outing, and you’re planning a night out with other friends. He’s always super-friendly on your floor, but he may be quiet or shy in class or at a party. Look for him in the TV room or study lounge at all hours, hosting an impromptu pizza party or a game of catch in the halls at 2 a.m. And be sure to pop in his room — the door’s always wide open — to pay your respects to your tireless leader.

10. The Party Animal

You may think you’re a pretty fun girl, going out a few times a week, maybe even sleeping out some nights if the night gets pretty crazy, but you’ve got nothing on the Party Animal. She goes out five nights a week, and takes Sunday and Monday to recover before starting again on Tuesday. You’ll spot her in class (never before 10 a.m.), in sweatpants and oversized sunglasses, clutching her Starbucks like it will save her life. She somehow manages to coast by in all her classes despite a grueling partying schedule, and even after the most toxic of hangovers she’ll bounce back by 10 p.m., shimmying her way into the hottest campus bar (with a fake ID, of course) in a trendy outfit and sky-high heels. She’s friends with all the bouncers, all the frat guys, all the bartenders and all the athletes, and you kind of want to be her, just a little bit. Then you see her throwing up on the sidewalk, or dancing on a table with her thong in full view, and you’re grateful for your relative sanity.

This article is an op-ed. The opinions presented in this piece are that of the author and not necessarily that of Her Campus.

Thinking about rushing a sorority?  Read the other side of the story here!

I’ll admit: upon entering college last year, joining a sorority was not on the top of my priority list.  I wanted to get involved writing for campus publications, audition for theater productions, ace all my classes—basically, I wanted to be the same über-involved girl I was in high school.  To me, Greek life seemed like a distraction from what was really important.  And besides, I had already been a high school cheerleader AND a Catholic school girl—adding “sorority girl” to the list seemed like one lame porn plot too many.

But nevertheless, I found myself signing up for rush with the rest of my freshman floormates.  I figured I’d go through the rounds to see if I was missing anything, and eventually drop out if I wasn’t.

It turns out I was.  Meeting hundreds of girls in the span of two weekends may sound like a total nightmare, but it was the perfect way for me to meet like-minded women: driven, sociable, and engaged.  Rush was a way for me to get exposed to groups of girls outside of my freshman hall, and I’m still friends with girls I met during recruitment, regardless of whether I ended up pledging their sorority or not. 

So here is my experience in the first year of sorority life—I think my sorority spirit could even make Casey Cartwright proud.

Bid Day—“It’s Like Christmas, but Instead of Presents We Get Friends!”

Bid Day is by far the best day of the year.  You finally get to reap the rewards of recruitment and celebrate with the new girls who will be your sisters.  The feeling of welcome I got from my sorority, Kappa Kappa Gamma, when I joined was unparalleled.  This year was especially exciting when I got to welcome one of my best friends into my sorority.  Never did I think a crowd of screaming girls wearing matching t-shirts would cause me to be emotional, but my sunglasses fogged up, sure enough.

Girls Got Your Back

Joining a sorority means you automatically have a group of girls to watch your back, no questions asked.  Whether you need a walk home after a night out, a chemistry tutor or just someone to attack a pint of Ben and Jerry’s with after a breakup, your sisters are there for you.  Although it’s unrealistic you’ll be best friends with 90 girls, I like to think that I could call any of my sisters in a time of need and know they’ll be there.

Your Social Calendar Will Be Bumpin’

Any self-respecting collegiette would never admit to having a tough time finding things to do on the weekend.  But there will come a time, sooner rather than later, that you realize you’ve been at the same fraternity house/dive bar/off-campus apartment three nights in a row.  It’s easy to get into a routine and let your social life go stale.  Greek life is the antidote.  Every week, my sorority has mixers with different fraternities, and sometimes even with varsity teams (mm, athletes).  We’re constantly, pardon the pun, mixing it up, so there’s always a new group to meet.  Oh, and while you’re at it, go ahead and pump up your love life—between all your sisters one of them will have the perfect guy to set you up with (or know the guy you have your heart set on).  Being part of a larger network of girls allows you to have access to people on campus you would have never met on your own.

Career Perks

While it’s great to be involved in on-campus organizations, a sorority goes beyond just campus life.  Once you pledge a certain sorority, you’ve attached yourself to a nationwide network of current members and alums.  This network can give you a leg up in applying for internships, and (gasp!) real jobs. 

Campus Involvement

For me, becoming involved in a sorority didn’t prevent me from becoming involved in other organizations.  In fact, it facilitated my involvement.  Navigating a new campus is tricky, and there are so many opportunities out there that you won’t be aware of them all.  That is, you won’t be until a sister points them out to you.  For example, I did a lot of singing in high school, but wasn’t quite sure how to translate that interest to college life.  Soon after rush, one of my sisters turned me on to an open mic night that I could audition for—I never would’ve known it existed otherwise.  I auditioned and now I’ve performed multiple times on campus, all thanks to Kappa!

So call me a convert.  I relish in the fact that I can call 90 amazing women on my campus sisters and many more nationwide.  Without my sorority, I never would have met my best friend, my boyfriend, and many other people who have made my college experience what it is today.  I may not be passing around a “snap cup” anytime soon, but I will be thanking the powers that be that I found my home in Kappa Kappa Gamma.

This past week, I had the chance to attend The Keds Brave Life Summit— an empowering and inspiring event. Exceptional girls everywhere from New York City to the Netherlands gathered at the Hearst Tower on August 15, 2014 to celebrate being a brave woman.

The summit got us thinking: As women in this century, we have so many opportunities, but so much is expected of us. Take something as simple as the stereotypical way girls sit versus the stereotypical way guys sit. Women are expected to sit up straight and cross their legs, while it is fine for men to slouch in their chairs with their legs open. Why is this? Why must women be the put-together, proper gender? We don’t. The girls at this summit learned that being brave is not about being perfect — it’s about saying what you think or believe and giving it a try.

Rachel Simmons, Co-Founder of Girls Leadership Institute, kicked off the event with a poll. 62 out of 80 girls polled at the summit said that they feel pressure to be perfect. That’s a lot! In hosting the summit, Keds aimed to share their goal to inspire bravery in girls and let them know that they don’t have to do everything or have it all in order to be amazing. We don’t have to be perfect!

We got to hear from inspiring speakers like Alicia Menendez, the host of “AM Tonight,” and Lauren Berger, better know as “The Intern Queen." Menendez shared firsthand advice that hiding and living a double life is cowardly.  If you aren’t feeling like yourself on the inside, it’s okay to let people know. If you need help, seek it. She advised, “We don’t know the depths of our own bravery until life challenges us. Get rid of things you feel are ‘obligations’ and find things that you love.”

Berger shared her story and her love of rejection — yes, you read that correctly. She taught us an important lesson: “Rejection doesn’t mean never — it just means not right now.” We shouldn’t get down on ourselves if we don’t get something on the first try because it clearly wasn’t meant to happen. She said that having a backup plan and a to-do list helps you cope and you should be sure to vent to the right people in the event of rejection (which happens to us all!).

As if we weren’t already inspired enough, Simmons mediated a panel discussion with Carol Baiocchi, Katzie Guy-Hamilton, Gina Kelly, Tammy Tibbetts, Dr. Dena Simmons and Lisa Tucker in which they shared their brave life stories and some great advice. Tucker, Chief Operating Officer of Shoe Show Inc., said, “It’s not going to happen when you think it’s going to happen. When one door closes, a lot of doors open.” The lesson here was that missing out on an opportunity is not the end of the world; if you keep an open mind you will see that there is so much more out there.

Dr. Simmons, the Associate Director of Education and Training at Yale’s Center for Emotional Intelligence, advised us to “ask for what you want.” You aren’t going to get places without voicing your opinion!

Gina Kelly, Fashion Director at Seventeen, shared with us the questions she asks herself: “What are other ways I can reach this girl?  What are new ways I can use my experience?” We must use innovative thinking and develop our support networks in order to help us advance in our careers and become better at what we do.

After hearing the panel and enjoying a performance from Soul Steps, a New York City-based stepping company, we got to listen to Sarah Jones, a Tony Award-winning playwright, share with us her multiple character, one-person show in which she taught us some important lessons: “Be brave, be yourself, and be authentic, always have high self-esteem, the sky is the limit, take care of yourself first, keep an open mind, when you love someone you can be brave, and listen to your higher self-voice.”  The bravery we will find comes from our true selves.

This event wouldn’t have been possible without the Brave Life Grants, in which Keds provided $50,000 to TMI (an agency of DoSomething.org), to help girls attend the Brave Life Summit. The newest one being the Change Your Community, Change Your World Grant which launched on August 15^th. This grant provided up to 50 girls (between the ages of 13 and 24) up to $1,000 each to fund their charitable dreams.

Thank you Keds, Seventeen, and Girls Leadership Institute for making this incredible event possible!

To see more from the event visit @keds or #sobrave to learn more about Keds Bravehearts.

This post brought to you by Keds. All opinions are 100% mine.

So you and your significant other have been together for a while now, and you couldn’t be more perfect for each other. You’ve often talked about how awesome it would be to live together, and this fall, you’re finally doing it! Now, spending quality time as a couple is a piece of cake.

However, although you’ve put a lot of thought into this decision, you may start to run into problems you hadn’t anticipated, like arguing over the dirty dishes or dealing with your friends’ disapproval. Luckily, HC is here to help with advice from relationship experts and tips from other collegiettes who know exactly what you’re going through!

1. The problem: You never have time to yourself

When you live with your significant other, you already see him or her all the time at home. Add to that going out together on dates and hanging out with mutual friends, and you might find yourself craving alone time. But even if you’re perfectly happy spending that much time with your SO, your friends might complain that they never see you two separately anymore.

Noelani Nasser, a senior at the University of California, Los Angeles, lived with her boyfriend this past summer. “When we first moved in together, we were so comfortable with each other that we didn't know how to do things on our own while the other was also in the apartment,” she says.

Learning how to balance the time you spend with and without your SO is a difficult process. “As in any relationship, it can be important to have some time to yourself,” says Lesli Doares, a marriage and relationship coach. “Given the intensity of college, this can be a challenge due the closed nature of the campus; your friends and activities can be more intertwined [than after college].”

How to handle it

As much as you love your partner, being together constantly can be overwhelming, “especially when you are young and starting to discover who you are,” says Neely Steinberg, a dating coach. “You should be sure to carve out both alone time and time to be with friends, try new activities or join clubs, etc. [sans your SO].”

If you’re worried about spending too much time away from your SO, just remember that balance is key. “There is no reason to worry about ‘neglecting’ your SO if the two of you are reasonable about how much time you spend apart and together,” Doares says. “Each of you may have your own ideas about how much time that is, but that is why productive communication skills are essential.”

If you and your SO realize that you’re spending too much time together for your relationship to stay healthy, try to put things in perspective. “My boyfriend and I talked it out,” Noelani says. “We realized that roommates, or people who live together, do things independently sometimes.” The couple did just that, and it worked out perfectly for them. “He is teaching himself how to play the guitar and keyboard while I'm at work during the week,” she says. “Also, we both just hang out in the apartment sometimes reading on our own or using our computers. So basically we are both at home, but not necessarily hanging out together.”

Not only will you benefit from taking this time for you, but so will your relationship. Make a point of doing your own thing from time to time so that you can come home and appreciate your partner all the more for it.

2. The problem: You can’t stand your partner’s annoying habits

So you and your SO are well past the honeymoon phase, and you think you know everything about each other – good and bad. But living with someone is a new experience that can bring out aspects of a person that you hadn’t necessarily noticed before, including annoying habits.

Heather Baldock, a senior at the University of Oregon, moved in with her boyfriend about a year ago, partly because splitting a studio apartment cost much less than living in her previous apartment. “Studio apartments are SO small, and you notice each other's flaws like crazy,” Heather says. “But even more so, you notice your own flaws.”

Even if your new living arrangement is working well for you, there are bound to be new arguments that arise, however trivial. “This is always a challenge for people sharing living quarters,” Doares says. “Add in the romantic component, and things can get sticky. Without a productive way of handling disagreements, the resentment and anger can spill over and undermine the health of the relationship.”

How to handle it

First of all, don’t freak out when you start noticing your SO’s flaws as well as your own. “Understand that every couple deals with this,” Steinberg says. “When you are thinking about [your SO’s] annoying habits or flaws, counter them with all the things that you love about [your SO] and are thankful for.”

When you live with someone so close to you, you have to be tolerant and levelheaded. “The most important advice I can give is to be willing to learn about yourself, your SO and how the relationship is and is not working,” Doares says.

But most of all, you should always communicate with your partner honestly and calmly. “It may be hard, it may be scary, it may be uncomfortable, but dealing with the issues straight on is the only way to reach resolution,” Doares says.

This method worked for Heather and her boyfriend. “We had to be very comfortable with each other,” she says. “If we had any arguments, we learned to address them upfront, which actually helped us work through a lot of issues. And after you both realize you're flawed, you learn how to cooperate and communicate effectively.”

If the housework is the main issue you’re facing, efficient communication is also key. “[Your SO] may have no idea that you care so much about not leaving dirty dishes in the sink,” Steinberg explains. “People aren't mind-readers! Once he knows about your requests and why they are important to you, you can come up together with ways to deal with the situation.”

If you both agree on a system for doing housework and stick to it, neither of you will get frustrated over chores anymore. Megan Johnson, a recent graduate from the University of California, Los Angeles, and her fiancé managed to distribute their chores fairly among the two of them. “David actually cooks all of our dinners, which takes a while because sometimes he makes elaborate meals,” she explains. “I do the dishes and laundry. In the end, the work pretty much balances out.”

3. The problem: You’re losing your romantic spark

Both spending too much time together with your SO and bickering over the housework can cause your romance to suffer. You might find yourselves making fewer efforts to maintain your spark: going out less, taking less care of your appearance or having less sex, for instance.

“Unresolved issues around chores and other household duties often play out in the level and frequency of intimacy,” Doares says. “Living together can result in taking the other person for granted and not seeing them as a romantic partner.”

Sam Elder, a junior at Virginia Commonwealth University, moved in with his boyfriend last fall. “We kept talking about how wonderful seeing each other all the time would be,” Sam says, “Quickly, I realized that things started to come between us; we always fought about splitting different bills, contributing to the household and the lack of intimacy that we so dreadfully missed.”

How to handle it

This problem is a part of any healthy long-term relationship, and isn’t something you should worry about too much. “The key here is to recognize that when you live with someone, it definitely changes the nature of the relationship,” Steinberg says. “It’s important not to see that as a bad thing – it’s the nature of going from romantic love to companionate love.”

And if the problems you and your SO has been having are sexual, keep in mind that “for a couple, especially a couple who lives together and has been together for a while, sex can't always be mind-blowing and like a scene from a Hollywood rom-com,” Steinberg says. “But certainly you can find ways to also make it fun and spontaneous.”

Whatever the intimacy issue you are dealing with, the solution is always to “be open and talk about your fears,” Steinberg advises. “Getting it off your chest with your partner is important, otherwise you can harbor resentment, which may lead to an explosion over something tiny and insignificant.”

But although your intimacy might evolve negatively in some ways, “perhaps you also will find new ways that your intimacy deepens,” Steinberg says. And we wish you nothing less!

4. The problem: Your friends and family criticize your lifestyle

You made the decision to move in with your SO, and you’re happy and confident with it. Way to go! Unfortunately, chances are not everyone in your life will be supportive of that. Heather says she and her boyfriend faced a lot of resistance when they decided to move in together. Although her family continues to hint at marriage, most of the criticism actually came from Heather’s friends. “Some told me it would be a huge mistake and ruin our relationship,” she says.

How to handle it

If you’re comfortable with your choice, there’s no reason to be affected by others’ criticism. But that’s often easier said than done, especially when the criticism comes from the people closest to you: your friends and family. You should prepare yourself to hear their concerns and keep in mind that they only want what’s best for you, even if it comes out the wrong way.

“Many couples may get feedback about getting too serious too soon and missing out on the college experience,” Doares says. “There may also be judgment about the morality of this choice.”

Try your best not to get offended or angry. Instead, Steinberg advises you sit down with your parents or friends. “Tell them that they need to trust your decisions as an adult, that it's important for them to support you, that you didn't come to the decision lightly and that you're adult enough to deal with the consequences,” she says.

5. The problem: You’re breaking up before the end of your lease

Judging by the experiences of the students we talked to, living with your SO in college can work out incredibly well. But realistically, you should keep in mind the possibility of you two breaking up before the end of your lease. And unfortunately, “this may be delayed past a natural due date because you are living together,” Doares says.

That’s what happened to Sam and his ex-boyfriend. “I was the only one to sign the lease,” Sam says. “After a pretty messy breakup this spring, we had to decide which of us could afford to stay there by ourselves. My ex chose to stay, while I moved in with a few of my friends. This resulted in numerous arguments and ridiculous situations; he once refused to give me bill money because I had a pair of his shorts that he wanted!”

For Doares, this difficult situation adds extra strain to an already painful breakup. “This is a real problem for you both from a financial and emotional perspective,” she says. “If you both signed the lease, there will be a financial cost to breaking it. If only one of you is on the lease, the other will have to find a new place to live.” And both of these options are far from ideal.

How to handle it

Thankfully, there are measures you can take to avoid breaking up. “Talk, talk, talk to each other when fears, worries or frustrations arise,” Steinberg says. “Say, ‘I feel hurt and confused when you do X, Y or Z’ instead of, ‘you do this and you do that.’ Be humble – recognize that you have faults and flaws, too. Remind yourself of why you fell in love with him or her in the first place.”

But if you do end up breaking up, how well you deal with this tough situation is ultimately up to you. “You'll definitely have to talk calmly and rationally about who stays and who goes and what to do about the remaining rent,” Steinberg says.

In order to prevent a situation like Sam’s, “it is a good idea to have both people's names on the lease so that if you do break up, you're both responsible for the remaining rent,” Steinberg says. This could make the circumstances that much better.

If your ex refuses to pay his or her remaining share of the rent, you might consider involving your landlord or getting legal help. “It depends what it’s worth to you,” Steinberg says. “If you have the time, energy and money, you could certainly get into a legal battle. If your partner can’t pay, you could ask that he or she find a replacement. ... It’s definitely a sticky situation.”

Moving in with your significant other is a big step to take, but you knew that already! Although you’re likely to come across some rough patches, working through them appropriately will only strengthen your relationship.

For Megan, “it is really important to move in with your significant other if you are in a serious relationship and if there is any possibility that you could be marrying them someday,” she says. “If living together doesn't work out, then how is a marriage going to?”

Heather has a slightly different opinion. “I've had friends who have cohabited before, and there's no right or wrong answer,” she says. “Every relationship is different, and cohabitation isn't for everyone! However, for us it really worked. You have to be mature and mindful.”

Good luck, collegiettes; we wish you all the best!

It’s the best part about returning to school: getting new clothes! You’re determined that this year, you’re going to finally achieve the perfect wardrobe. All of your pieces will mix and match perfectly, there won’t be a hanging thread or broken sandal in sight and you’ll combine trendy and traditional styles together fearlessly. Unfortunately, our expectations don’t always match up with reality.

Expectation: You saved up all summer so you could afford anything you wanted.

Reality: All those Starbucks Frappuccinos, online shopping sprees and Taco Tuesdays really added up.

Expectation: You’ll pick out a comfy outfit that will let you shop 'til you drop but is still cute enough to impress all the hot employees.

Reality: You either end up wearing a romper or something equally impractical that will have you cursing yourself in every dressing room you enter.

Or you end up rocking a cozy ensemble that has no fashion quotient whatsoever.

Expectation: All of your friends will want to come with you to help you pick out your fabulous new wardrobe.

Reality: Everyone is “busy.”

Expectations: The mall will be shining, spotless and easy to navigate.

Reality: There are so many people, you feel like you’re in a mosh pit.

Expectation: You have an extremely well-thought-out list of everything you need to finally own that dream closet.

Reality: What list?

Expectation: You'll walk into your favorite store and there will be options in every size, color and shape.

Reality: You only find one thing you like… and it doesn’t fit.

Expectation: You'll go into the next store to pick up that skirt or pair of shoes you've been lusting over online.

Reality: They don't have it, and now it's sold out online.

Expectation: You won’t buy anything that’s not affordable or on sale.

Reality: You find a budget-blowing, totally impractical piece that also looks crazy good.

Expectation: You'll head to the cosmetics counter and receive a makeover that will make you look ***flawless for the new school year.

Reality: You walk out looking like Kesha's makeup artist and KISS's makeup artist had a fight on your face.

Expectations: You'll finish your sartorial mission feeling exhausted but proud that you just overcame the shopping odds and have some great outfits to usher in fall semester.

Reality: You already know you'll have to hit the stores again next week to search for all the things you didn't buy.

In college, as in life, some things are unavoidable: tuition, essays, bad-for-you food…and roommates. Unless you live at home while going to school, from the time you enter the higher education world until you leave it (and probably beyond that), you will be coping with people in your personal space – sharing a bathroom, the kitchen and the TV. In the land of shared space, problems arise frequently– and if you never deal with them, they have the potential to ruin any relationship. Use these tips from experts and real college girls on getting along with your roommate – whether your roomie is a random assignment or your best friend.

What to Do From the Get-Go

A new school year (often) comes with a new living situation – if you’re a new freshman this might be your first time sharing your space with another person — not to mention sharing a bathroom with many more people — or you might be an upperclassman who has just moved off campus with friends into an apartment or house. Either way, it’s best to set up ground rules with your roommate(s) to ensure that everyone stays happy and you don’t end up like these HC girls!

Communicate

If you’re living in the dorms, your RA may force you and your roommate to sign a contract concerning things from what to do during a disagreement to how to handle chores, boys in the room and study/sleep schedules. If you live off-campus and aren’t being encouraged to sign a roommate contract, a verbal discussion is a good idea.

Things that should be in any roommate contract (no matter your situation): whether you have times (such as right before a big test or past midnight on a school night) when you need quiet; your feelings about guys/boyfriends staying the night and how to split chores evenly.

Living in the dorms can be especially tricky, however, because neither roommate has the ability to simply go into their own room for escape. Make sure you and your roommate clearly state your boundaries – for instance, if she needs quiet to study but you listen to background music, come up with compromises (you listen to your iPod rather than your stereo) in the beginning to deal with space concerns.

Living outside the dorms involves more than just cleanliness and proximity issues, however. “Sit down with your roommate(s) to set these boundaries from day one,” advises Emma Wallace, a student at Texas State University. “Decide who will do dishes on what days, grocery shopping guidelines (do you share or buy your own) and if there are boyfriends involved, make sure wires are never crossed with that. If you have the basics set in stone (with a little wiggle room), it's hard to mess it up.”

Bond

If you just moved in with a friend (or several), chances are you don’t think you need to bond; however, if you’re first-time roommates, it wouldn’t be a bad idea. Try having a roommate night (cook a joint meal and rent a movie, perhaps) – this could be a good time to discuss more serious topics, like how you aren’t okay with her plans to have her bf over every other night.

Kathryn Williams, author of Roomies: Sharing Your Home with Friends, Strangers, and Total Freaks, says, “If you're living with a stranger, I think it goes a long way to have an icebreaker outing with that person - lunch, coffee, a party, a movie in the commons room. It just starts things off on a friendly foot, even if you have no intentions of hanging out with that person. He or she is probably just as nervous about living with a stranger as you are.”

What to Do When Problems Arise

Susan Fee, author of My Roommate is Driving Me Crazy!, gives five tips from her book on what to do when you and your roommate clash:

1. Talk. If something’s bugging you, bring it up in a non-defensive way rather than assuming your roommate can read your mind. Nothing can change unless you acknowledge it. It’s possible that your roommate may not even be aware of the problem.

2. Focus on behavior, not personality. It’s not reasonable to ask people to change who they are, but you can ask them to tone down how they express themselves, especially when it’s invading your turf. So, you can’t criticize someone for being "perky," but you can ask for someone not to talk so much while you’re studying.

3. Stay flexible. It’s not your job to fix anybody else, and it helps to recognize that no one is perfect. Be willing to look at your own behavior. Consider what you could do differently to help the situation instead of only blaming your roommate.

4. Start with one pet peeve. What can you absolutely not deal with? What do you find extremely irritating, but could live with if you had to? There are probably tons of things your roommate does that get on your nerves. But nothing kills a relationship faster than listing dozens of reasons why you don’t like a person. Instead, both of you need to list your number one pet peeve and focus your energy on solving that first.

5. Consider the positives. Before you decide that life would be better with a roommate exactly like you, think of what you could gain by living with your opposite. We’re often attracted to people who are different from us because they represent qualities we wish we possessed. If you’re shy, maybe being around a more outgoing person will force you out of your shell. When one person’s strength makes up for the other’s weakness, being opposites is an advantage.

Find more of Susan’s survival tips here.

Williams also weighs in how to deal with problems if they do come up: “If your roommate is doing something that's annoying you, tell him or her – nicely, if possible,” she says. “When things are awkward, it's sometimes easier to do this the passive-aggressive way - like leaving a Post-It note on her mirror or putting their smelly tennis shoes in the garbage. While easier in the short run, in the long run this only makes things worse - especially if you're sharing a small space. So try to be direct. And whether you're best friends or relative strangers, it's always good to maintain some personal space, even if it's just the size of a twin bed and an hour with your earphones on. Everyone needs some ‘me time.’”

For a good in-between solution for not-so-confrontational girls, there is another suggestion: texting. Texting allows you to communicate openly without the embarrassment and awkwardness of face-to-face conflict resolution. HC writer Allie Jones, a student at College of William and Mary, says that texting also saves a lot of time when it comes to letting your roommate know what your plans are. “It sounds weird that you need to be texting someone that you live with, but it was so easy to text each other when we were going to be in the room,” she said. “It was much easier to text my roommate on Friday night that I might be bringing my boyfriend over rather than just showing up with him unannounced. She did the same for me, like text if she wouldn't be coming home that night, so I wouldn't worry, or say if she would be back late and I would just leave a little light on and go to sleep.”

Sharing your place with another person, whether it's a new experience for you or you’ve had years of practice, is never easy. Use these tips to keep hostility at bay, and you’ll be gossiping about the cute guy in your chem lab rather than the newest annoyance your roommate has inflicted upon you. Trust me, your friends will thank you.

Are you a smart and savvy pre-collegiette looking for answers to some of your most personal questions about college? You know, the ones about boys, classes, roommates and parties that your school’s guidance office can’t help you with? Jen is here to answer those questions! Whatever your concern, she’ll do her best to help you so you can make sure you don’t just survive college, but rock it!

What was the scariest thing about your first year in college? –Emily

Emily,

Quite honestly, I don’t remember anything truly scary about my first year in college. Sure, there are plenty of little things that you don’t know about and need to learn, like how to live with a bunch of girls all the time and how to handle all of your coursework, but you get the hang of everything in due time!

I think one of my top fears before I started college was how difficult the coursework was going to be. I did really well in high school, graduating in the top percentage of my class and rocking that fab golden sash at graduation that the National Honor Society gave me, but I was nervous that college was going to be a whole new ball game. I expected to go crazy due to the workload and intensity. Basically, I thought the work was going to be as difficult as figuring out how to contour as well as Kim Kardashian.

Even though it was definitely challenging, the work wasn’t anything that was too far out of my league. You definitely need to study more than in high school and learn how to manage your time to get everything done efficiently, but at the end of the day, it’s not that big of a deal. The college that accepted you knows what you’re capable of and wouldn’t have accepted you if they didn’t think you’d excel there. The best advice I can give you is to just be patient with yourself, and everything will fall into place. To be proactive about making your academics a priority, try to seek out help from a peer tutor if you find yourself struggling with a subject. It also helps to build a strong relationship with your academic adviser, who has been in your shoes and will be able to give you beneficial advice.

Another common fear that I didn’t have but I knew lots of girls on my floor had was how to survive being away from home. This can definitely be intimidating if you have awesome relationships with your parents or you’re tight with your hometown crew, so it totally makes sense that leaving all of that can be beyond your comfort zone. Again, this is something that is relatively easy to fix, since we have so much amazing technology to help us stay in touch with loved ones. Try scheduling weekly FaceTime chats with friends and family if you’re going to school far from home. If you live reasonably close to campus, go home for a weekend every month or every other month. Going to college doesn’t mean losing your high school self and those who were part of that time in your life; it’s about growing and learning while meeting new friends, still staying in touch with your true-blue crew all the while.

That said, be as fearless as you possibly can. You may have some pre-orientation anxieties (we all do!), but don’t let fear get in your way of an unforgettable first year at college. It’s a time you’ll never forget, and it leaves plenty of room for mistakes and new adventures, so embrace every minute of it!

There’s something about the change in seasons that makes us crave a dramatic change. However, you don’t have to max out your credit card on a new wardrobe or a drastic hair-color change to impress everyone when you return back to school! These effortless ideas will do the trick.

1. Part your hair differently

An easy yet noticeable change to revamp your look for back to school is to change your part. If you have a side part, shake things up by switching to a middle part. You’ll be surprised how much this change will highlight different facial features of yours and give you a fresh new ‘do without the cost of a professional styling job.

The next time you jump out of the shower, comb your hair into the new part, blow-dry to keep your hair from trying to go back to its original place and spray your hair with hair spray to keep it in place. We recommend TRESemmé Ultra Fine Mist Hair Spray ($3.29); it won’t harden or get sticky when it dries.  

2. Give yourself an at-home blowout 

We always love coming home from the beauty salon with our hair blown out and styled, but you don’t have to go to the salon every time you want to have this red-carpet-ready look. Try an at-home blowout for free! We spoke with celebrity hairstylist Angelo David Pisacreta of Angelo David Salon in New York City for some great tips.

1. To achieve a full look, start by washing your hair with a volumizing shampoo, such as Angelo David VOL Shampoo ($24).
2. Follow with a volumizing conditioner such as TRESemmé Naturals Radiant Volume Conditioner with Sweet Orange ($5.79). You’ll want to work it toward the ends of your strands and away from your scalp to prevent it from flattening your hair.
3. Gently pat down your hair to dry.
4. Next, spritz a volumizing hair spray, like Samy Salon Systems Skyscraper Volumizing Hairspray ($6.29), to the root of your hair.
5. Apply a heat-protectant product such as Redken’s Pillow Proof Blow Dry Express Primer ($10).
6. Flip your hair upside down to dry only the roots.
7. Start by sectioning your hair into sections with clips. You can create two sections on the sides, four in the back and three on top.
8. Using a hair dryer with a diffuser attachment, start drying the lower sections. Use a large round brush to blow out the sections.
9. Once finished, apply hair spray.

3. Commit to long-lasting manis

It can be hard to maintain your flawless mani at school when you have so much going on, but having your nails pretty and painted is a fun way to express your style. If you want to keep your nails unchipped and colorful, we suggest using no-chip topcoats and acrylic gel. This way, you can get a shellac manicure without the appointment (and without the expensive at-home shellac kits). Our favorite products are Sally Hansen’s Hard as Wraps Powerful Acrylic Gel ($5.99) and Sally Hansen’s No Chip Acrylic Topcoat ($4.99). All you need is your favorite nail color and these products to get a great at-home gel manicure!

4. Opt for bolder lip shades

With fall comes great, new fall lip colors! It’s a time to store away those bright pinks and experiment with bold, dark shades, even if you didn’t feel ready to rock them last autumn. Check out how to wear dark lipstick here!

5. Whiten your teeth

Try a whitening treatment to brighten your smile before you return to campus. There are several ways to do this, depending on your preference. Chicago-based dentist Richard Brenner says you can use a combination of hydrogen peroxide and baking soda (must be 50 percent diluted), but it should not be used daily. Brenner suggests you speak with your dentist about at-home whitening products that are dentist approved and right for you personally.

Just a couple of changes here and there will give you a new look that everyone at school is sure to notice. With fall semester fast approaching, it’s definitely time to start revamping your style!

Say so long to your high school guys, and HEL-LOOO to college boys. As a freshman girl, eligible cuties seems to be everywhere – and guess what? They’re all looking at you. The attention can be fun, but when it comes down to it, the dating game in college is one that you’ll learn a lot about as time goes on – you might not be a pro right off the bat. To get started, Her Campus has put together a list of the DOs and DON’Ts of college dating. Who, you ask, knew there was such a science behind college guys, anyway? Aren’t they just a bunch of sex-hungry dudes? Well, maybe, but there might be a little bit more to it. Here are the guidelines of how to deal with the ones who are, and the ones who aren’t. Read ‘em and weep, girls.

DO make friends with the guys on your floor. These guys will be super fun to hang out with once they get to know each other well, and you’ll be the cool girl who can get in on that action when you need a break from girl drama. On top of it, you might really connect with one of them.

DON’T rush into anything, though. Hooking up with one or two of your hallmates within the first few days of school, however, is a definite no-no. When tempted to engage in “dormcest,” remind yourself that you’re going to have to face him – as well as everyone else on your floor, because they’re going to find out – for the rest of the year, no matter how good or bad your hook-up was.

DON’T write anybody off too soon. Just because he’s sitting alone and doesn’t speak to anyone in the class doesn’t mean he’s a total lunatic. If you’re interested, all it takes is a slow pack-up-and-hang-back after class to initiate conversation.

DO go out to meet people. Find out where the hot spots are each night of the week(end), and make sure to show up every once in a while. As a new student, you’ll get a feel for student life and get exposed to every kind of guy – frat boys, athletes, pre-meds, business students and artsy guys, too.

DON’T stay in talking to your high school boyfriend every night. If you’ve broken up, there was a reason, and now is the time to move on. Your freshman year is meant for new beginnings, not dwelling on old relationships. Phone calls between Texas and Massachusetts won’t bring you back together – it’ll only keep you from meeting new people that are just beyond your dorm room door.

DO start off slowly if you’re not used to dating or just got out of a relationship. Study hall or dining hall dates count, too! As casual as these settings are, it can be a great place to get to know a guy or meet someone new. Take it easy if you’re just getting your feet wet with the whole dating game, and don’t feel a need to rush into anything intense.

DON’T go out every single night. A little mystery never hurt anyone… and it’ll do wonders for your grades, too. A mother’s wisest words – if guys see you going out night after night, how will they ever get to miss you? Show face as often as you can without being that girl that everyone expects to run into.

DO look around your classes for guys. If they’re showing up for class at all, then you know they’ve at least got something going for them. And hey, maybe he’s even smart and organized enough for you to make him your “study buddy.” Study dates are pretty much the best dates most college girls can hope for within the first month or so of school (news flash: college guys are usually cheap).

DON’T make him think you’re interested if you’re not just because you don’t want the perks to go away. It’s not fair to the guy if you’re just not that into him, but you keep him around because he’s, like, obsessed with you. The puppy dog thing will get old after a while, leaving him feeling stupid/angry and you feeling unfulfilled, annoyed and guilty – not to mention that other guys you might actually become interested in will get the wrong idea.

DO engage in a random hook-up (safely), if you want to. They’re part of the college lifestyle, and you can choose if you want to engage in them or not (certainly, you can avoid making out with the guy you’ve been dancing with all night if you’re just not that into it). It’s up to you to decide if that’s your style, but know that it happens and it doesn’t have to be scandalous or “slutty” – but just, in fact, kind of fun. As long as you’re not going crazy by swapping saliva with every guy you lay eyes on, random hook-ups can be fun and can lead to date parties, formals and maybe even a real date! If nothing else, at least you can get an exciting night or two out of them — just make sure to stay safe and keep your friends posted on your whereabouts.

DON’T count on them turning into anything serious. Most of the time, dance-floor make-outs (DFMO’s) start and finish on the dance floor and only go as far as a phone number swap. Take these experiences for what they are, and don’t think he’s fallen in love with you simply because he’s been attached to your mouth all night.

DO accept invitations/initiations from older guys. Attention from upperclassmen is surely a plus in any freshman’s book, because they’re seasoned. They know what’s up in this whole college world, and it can be quite nice to have a hot, older guy show you the ropes – he’ll let you know what parties are happening, bring you to date parties, introduce you to his friends and be a pretty face to show up in your tagged pictures on Facebook. That said, don’t feel the need to hook up with him purely because he’s “older and wiser…” because he may just turn out to be pretty stupid.

DON’T feel pressured to have sex. No, we can’t be certain that what all guys are looking for is sex, but that’s definitely a part of college hook-ups. He might want it and he might even ask for it, but if you’re uncomfortable, it’s not up to you to give it to him. Know your boundaries and ask him – whether you know him well or not – to respect your boundaries; if he doesn’t, walk away.

DO avoid those guys that hook up with your entire group of friends. There are always the guys that have no qualms about coming in between a group of girl friends just to get some action. He has no problem with hooking up with each one of your friends by jumping from one to the next. He might have no idea that what he’s doing is hurting your relationships with your friends, but it’s up to you guys to stop him by cutting him out of the equation.

DON’T get too attached to said upperclassmen. He’s graduating sooner than you are, and he knows it. Upperclassmen usually aren’t in it for the long haul when they seek out a freshman girl that they’d like to hook up with. Just because he’s lent you a bunch of attention one night, don’t assume that he’ll be chasing after you for the rest of the semester.

DO be open to going on dates with anyone. That is, of course, presuming that dates aren’t obsolete anymore. While a lot of guys don’t even have the courtesy to take a girl out for dinner – or even coffee?! – there are some who like to kick it old school and go for the dinner and a movie. If you’re looking for companionship of any kind, there’s no reason to refuse a casual invitation to lunch or dinner.

DON’T expect him to take you out to fancy meals all the time. But at the same time, know that college culture is changing, and going out on the “dates” we see happening in movies or the ones we hear about from our parents simply doesn’t happen anymore, for the most part. These guys are most likely on a budget, so fancy dinner dates aren’t always an option. There’s nothing wrong with a nice fro-yo in the quad, though!

DON’T count on finding a boyfriend right away. Keep in mind that as many hotties as you see on a regular basis, most of them aren’t right for you. It’s about finding the right one that’s interested in having the same type of relationship that you are, no matter what type that may be. Also, be wary of becoming BF-GF with someone on Day 1 of orientation. Do some exploring before you settle on one guy to get hot and heavy with right away.

DO start a relationship if you find someone special. Maybe you’ll find him on day one of classes, or maybe it’ll take until senior year for you to realize that the guy you’ve been friends with all along suddenly seems like he’s ready to take the plunge with you. But if it feels right, don’t hold back, and find a way to make it work.

DO know that people move on quickly in college. Hook-ups last for any length of time – you can be attached to one particular guy for several months, or only for a matter of days and it can still be considered “hooking up.” Go figure. At any rate, don’t be surprised if a guy has eyes for you on Thursday and then you spot him spitting game to another girl on Saturday. Don’t get jealous or crazy and be that girl who slaps him in the middle of the party. Instead, try to figure out what he’s interested in before you hook up with him, so you know what to expect from him after the fact.

DON’T hold back if you want something more out of a hook-up. If you silence yourself, you’ll only end up unhappy and wasting your time. He may not be taking your relationship as seriously as you wished he would if it started out as a random hook-up. If your feelings intensify and you want to take it to the next level, let him know and don’t make him guess. If you’re afraid of scaring him off, leave your feelings on the table and the situation open-ended. This is his relationship too, and you don’t wish to monopolize it, so ask him what it is that he wants out of it. Chances are that otherwise he won’t just guess that you want to be treated to romantic dinners and you’ll just end up getting frustrated and angry.

DO try to meet guys without a gaggle of girls surrounding you. While girls’ night out is always one of the best nights of the week, do try to distance yourself from your pack of besties for a little bit each night. No guy wants to approach you if your six best friends are by your side eyeing him with those girly judgmental glares.

DON’T get left places alone or go home with a guy you don’t know…and having made out with him all night doesn’t make him any more familiar. If you do manage to separate from your girlfriends for a few minutes, keep in touch with them to make sure they’re not leaving the club/bar/party without you. It’s risky to leave with a guy you’ve just met – especially if one of his friends who “didn’t drink tonight” is driving – even if he seems genuine. Exchange numbers instead, and stay with your girlfriends.

College will open doors for you in the way of the dating scene, but it always helps to take things slowly and be wary. Stay grounded and always question people’s intentions, while making sure that your own are as clear as crystal. Your future boyfriend is out there somewhere, whether he’s sitting next to you in class or isn’t even enrolled at your school. And you’ll find him, too... you just may have to kiss a few frogs first and have a lot of single and mingling fun.

This article is an op-ed. The opinions presented in this piece are that of the author and not necessarily that of Her Campus.

Thinking about rushing a sorority?  Read the other side of the story here!

Every story has two sides.

For some, joining a sorority has been a lifelong dream. Maybe you’re a legacy. Maybe your BFF rushes, so you do, too.

Greek life isn’t for everyone, though. Even members of sororities recognize that it’s not all fun and games, and the downsides to being Greek sometimes prevail.  So before you rush, consider these disadvantages.

Going Greek will cost you

On top of tuition and fees, room and board, books and other costs associated with college (collegiettes know the list all too well), joining a sorority takes a monetary commitment. Some of the cost associated with sororities is fairly straightforward – if you live in a house you have to pay rent, some Greek organizations collect dues to pay for functions, etc. But that’s not all that is expected of your bank account.

One sorority sister, Jackie*, said these “hidden fees” were the biggest problem after joining. “During rush this year our rush chair was a NIGHTMARE,” Jackie said. “She submitted our invite lists back late numerous times which resulted in penalty fees for my house. Guess who had to pay for them? Us. We were all fined $20 or so because she couldn't get her act together.” Jackie also had to dip into her purse when she and her sisters were forced to donate to charity or pay for unsold tickets to philanthropy events. Also, she said, big-little week cost her hundreds of dollars on “stupid junk” for her little.

Is this fair? If I had a genuine desire to rush, would I be forced to leave if I didn’t have the funds? Nicole, a recent graduate of the University of Iowa, said she chose not to rush because of the expense. “I'm outgoing and very involved, but I don't need to pay thousands of dollars to make friends, get volunteering options and live in a house full of girls (which is a whole new reason not to join for me on its own).” However, sororities will sometimes take financial aid into account, and some offer scholarship programs, so if you’re concerned about paying for membership, don’t let it deter you—contact your school’s Panhellenic organization before you make any decisions.

…Sometimes more than just $$$

Being in a sorority is a big time commitment. There are Greek-sponsored functions you have to attend, pledging activities, and Greek Week events, all on top of parties and informal get-togethers because of the social nature of sororities and fraternities. Unless your life consists of only classes (sans homework) and Greek life, then as a sister you’re going to be busy (and that paper due may take a back seat to the hot frat party that everyone is going to). In other words, being Greek can get in the way of other responsibilities, especially academics.

What about hazing? Even though it has been banned across the country, hazing still occurs on campuses all over the U.S. During my freshman year at CSU I had a close friend who went through hazing for her sorority. Through an anonymous tip to the Greek Life office, the sorority has since been banned from campus, but I saw almost firsthand the effect hazing can have. Not only is hazing detrimental to the girls being harmed, it affects the reputation of the entire Greek system and the university.

Socializing outside the Greek system can be tricky

When it comes to meeting new people, being in a sorority sounds like a great way to meet new friends and socialize with attractive frat boys.

Unfortunately guys in fraternities have bad reputations associated with them just like girls in sororities do, such as frat guys being jerks (hot jerks, but nevertheless…not BF material). Whether that is true or not depends on the individual, but it is a fairly common discovery by girls’ newly-broken hearts.

Also, it can get much harder to dedicate quality time to friendships outside of your sorority.

Sorority girls are stereotyped…

We all know the stereotype, whether you’re in a sorority or not: Greek girls are seen as bitchy, narcissistic and shallow. There are the not-so-bad stereotypes too: fun, gorgeous, and über-feminine. For the most part, I doubt you want these labels stuck to your forehead automatically (regardless of accuracy) when you wear your letters.

“Never was my sorority the number one thing that defined me,” said Jackie. “I don't appreciate people making blanket assumptions of me based on my sorority.”

Annie*, a Colorado State senior, said one reason for not rushing was the negative stereotypes some houses perpetuate. “I personally wouldn't want to people think I fit the stereotype. It just gives people a reason to judge you without really knowing you.”

…Some of the stereotypes are true

Sorority girls are commonly seen as overly-dramatic and extremely gossip-prone. While I admit this description can fit a number of girls in and out of sororities, drama and gossip frequently run unchecked in sorority houses. If you think “high school drama” ends when you reposition your tassel on graduation day – you’d be wrong. If you hate drama (like I do, with a serious passion) you may want to consider how much you’ll have to deal with in a sorority. 

While some girls hate being stereotyped, others maintain it and allow the “misconceptions” to continue. Emily*, a junior at Syracuse, pledged and then chose to deactivate because she realized Greek life was just not for her. “Too many girls defined themselves through their sororities, and I couldn't handle all the judgment and stereotypes among the houses. There was so need for it, and I felt like it was more about partying with the ‘good frats’ and having a high ‘ranking’ on the campus Greek hierarchy than about sisterhood and friendship.”

Problems in the Greek system

Sarah Nadler, HC’s former Campus Correspondent at The College of William and Mary, wrote an opinion editorial on her school’s newspaper about rush. Sarah rushed her freshman year because it was the “normal” thing to do. However, she disliked the way she was “dirty rushed” –older sisters told blatant lies and gossip about the other sororities in order to gain prospects. None of it, she said, was actually true.

During the rush process, Sarah lost a good friend because she chose to rush a different sorority. Regardless, she stayed with her sorority for three years and had a lot of fun in the process. That was until she published her editorial, however. This is her story:  

“I ended up quitting because I did not agree with the rush process. I thought it was sexist, antiquated, and a big waste of time. The real reason why I quit though, was my chapter's reaction to my editorial on rush. People thought it was ‘conduct unbecoming’ for a sorority girl to speak about the process in such a way. My chapter president uninvited me from rush because of the opinion article and refused to hear me out. Overall the process was so antidemocratic, so backwards, I couldn't imagine being part of an organization that would literally attempt to censor me.” 

When sorority sister Alice* got drunk at a party and had a brief make-out session with another girl from her pledge class, she and the other girl were yelled at. “They told us it was our fault if the chapter got a slutty name, and we were given 10 hours each of community service…the fact that they would issue sanctions like that really made me angry. What if we were lesbians? The fact that they called us in is an example of how unaccepting sororities really are. They don't want you to be different; they don't want you to truly voice your opinion. Instead, they want you to be pretty and proper in order to give the chapter a good name on campus.” 

You can also check out HC Contributing Writer Katie Sanders’s article on why she didn’t rush at UPenn.

Ultimately, deciding to rush should be a personal decision. Regardless of what your friends do or what your family may expect of you, only join if it truly makes you happy. I decided my freshman year that being in a sorority was not the college experience that I wanted – but, being informed of the pros and the cons (you can’t blindly trust the girls recruiting to give you the dirt on the negatives) is the first step to making a smart decision that fits you. 

*Names have been changed.

In an ideal world, you’d fall in love with your summer internship, and once it was over, you’d be surprised with a job offer because your employer just couldn’t stand to lose you. Sounds perfect, right? Yet somehow, life doesn’t always work out that easily for most of us.

Don’t stress, collegiettes! Just because you didn’t get hired doesn’t mean you didn’t do a great job or that your supervisor didn’t like you. In many cases, it just means that there wasn’t a position to fill at the time.

So don’t let not landing the job get you down, collegiettes—there are so many awesome perks about your internship that you’ll get regardless if you land a job offer or not. HC counts ‘em off for you.

You made connections

An internship is one of the best places to network. You have the opportunity to meet professionals and develop lasting relationships with them. They may even help you get a job at another point in your life!

When you’ve worked with someone before, he or she can put in a good word for you. So don’t be shy, and talk to as many people at your internship as you can! Ask them questions about what they do and how they got there. Most people will be happy to talk to you.

Before your internship is over, be sure to grab contact information from people you’ve worked with. Connect on LinkedIn so your former coworkers can stay up-to-date with your ongoing projects, and message them occasionally to stay in touch!

You can get recommendations

Most job applications require a list of professional contacts for recommendations. Sure, you can include professors, but it looks better to have former employers as references, too. A former internship supervisor can really speak to your work ethic.

So even if your internship didn’t result in a job offer, it can still help you get a job elsewhere! Again, it’s important to have good contacts at your internship who wouldn’t mind you putting their names down as references. Remember: Always ask potential references before you put their names and contact information on an application.

Expert interview coach Barry Drexler says to make providing references for you as simple as possible for your contacts.

“Make it easy for your reference by asking specifically what you want, e.g., ‘Please provide a reference about my general performance, including my abilities with clients, my computer skills … etc.,’” he says.

You’ll get interview ready

Relevant experience is one of the most important things that employers look for in job candidates. They want to see that you’ve used your time in college wisely. Having internships on your resume will put you ahead of the game!

Having prior experience will beneficial during interviews because you can talk about your internship experiences when answering questions.

“Internships are for learning and improving skills,” Drexler says. “Therefore, during the interview, you must talk about how your internships accomplished this.”

You get to shop companies

One of the perks of an internship is that it allows you to figure out what you want from a future company. Did you like the location, the tasks and the work environment of your current internship? That’s a good sign you should look for similar companies when you apply for jobs! On the other hand, you may have had an internship that you thought you’d love, but realized when you get there that it wasn’t what you expected and you would be happier working elsewhere. That’s one of the great things about internships: You get to see what it is like to work somewhere every day without fully committing yet.

Not getting a job offer might be a blessing in disguise if it would have made you consider taking a job that you didn’t really like simply because the offer was available. You don’t want to get stuck in a job that you don’t enjoy!

“Offer or no offer, you learned and developed skills that someone else wants,” Drexler says. “It’s a good thing you didn’t get it because it could have been the worst job, and now you'll get something better. Most people realize this when they look back, but it’s hard when you're going through rejection.”

Don’t freak out because your friends all have big-girl jobs and you don’t yet. Giving yourself more time to really figure out what you want to do before committing to a job offer will only help you in the long run. So go make the most of the internship experience you have under your belt and explore your other job options!  

The end of summer is bittersweet - on one hand, you're going back to a semester filled with homework and boring lectures, but on the other hand, you get to go back to parties, independence and, more importantly, your roommate. Your roommate has been with you through the good times and the bad. She's watched you lie on the couch panting after double-fisting cheesy bread and Cinna Stix, and yet, she still chooses to live with you. Here's what to expect when you reunite with your roomie this fall!

Stage 1: Excitement

You finally have your partner in crime back. Who else will hand you a glass of water and force-feed you animal crackers after a night of too much Fireball?

Stage 2: Giving compliments

They'll be exchanged for at least two full minutes:

 "Ugh, you're so tan; I'm jealous!"

"No way, I'm a ghost. You definitely look fit, though!"

Stage 3: Catching up 

This is the part where you both feel obligated to ask how each other's summers were even though you texted each other daily about how insanely bored you were.

“Where’d you go? Who’d you hook up with?”  

#Nowhere #Nobody

Stage 4: Making plans

This is the year that you're going to go to clubs, music festivals and weekend getaways EVERY weekend.

(You both know that won't actually happen. See actual weekend plans below).

Stage 5:Deciding weekly rituals 

Every Sunday will be dedicated to sitting on the couch together with pad thai and the new episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, just as the Lord (Scott Disick) intended.

Stage 6:Rummaging through each other's closets

Why wait around for sales at the mall when you can borrow your roommate's romper any time you want?

Stage 7: Figuring out how to live with her again

Excuse me? Ma'am? I'm trying to watch Game of Thrones on my laptop, so, do you mind? One does not simply watch Scandal with no headphones in. 

Stage 8:Remembering her annoying little habits

It's always hard to deal with someone who doesn't believe in cleanliness. "Is your milk-encrusted cereal bowl just going to bring itself over to the sink, or... ?"

Stage 9:Putting everything aside and hanging out together just like old times

The moment you've both been waiting for since May. 

Busy? We understand. Whether you’re studying for an exam or suffering through a long day of classes, it seems like there’s just never enough time in a day, especially when it comes to making time to work out! Because, seriously, who has time to hit the gym when we could be spending our free time binge watching Netflix shows? Never fear; HC is here with a few quick workout tips for the collegiette who can’t seem to spare more than a few minutes.

1. Get a pedometer

With all of the time you spend walking back and forth between your dorm or apartment and the main campus, the first thing you should probably consider doing if you’re pressed for time is invest in a pedometer. A pedometer measures the amount of steps you take.

Start off by recording how many steps you can take in a given number of days. Then, you can start setting daily goals for yourself in terms of how much walking you’d like to be doing.

“Keeping track of your steps can give you a fabulous internal dialogue,” says Melanie Ludwig, personal trainer and owner of Prestige Fitness. “Knowing that you reached the level you are striving for, you’re more apt to make better food choices and try to keep moving!”

Any time you start thinking about how miserable that long walk between the dining hall and the student center is, think about how many steps you’re taking and how much they’ll pay off in the end!

2. Do some interval training

This one sounds a little intimidating, but we promise it’s not as complicated as you think! Interval training is just a combination of high-intensity activity mixed with low-intensity activity. Think of it as getting a random burst of energy in the middle of doing something that’s not very exciting.

“If you’re outdoors, you can walk, jog or run for a few minutes, then stop and do some body-weight exercises, like lunges, squats or push-ups,” Ludwig says. “I would warm up with a five-minute slow jog, then crank up the intensity for five minutes, do a set of walking lunges, another five minutes of cardio, push-ups, then repeat.”

A routine like this can help you spruce up your walk to class. Granted, it might be a little weird for anyone walking near you to see you doing lunges, but at least your walk to biology won’t be boring! Try this less-strange-looking alternative: Walk to class as fast you as possibly can for two minutes, and then do a slow stroll for another minute. Repeat until you get to class!

3. Dance around

If you’re indoors for the day studying or cleaning your room, feel free to take a short break and channel your inner Queen Bey by dancing! “The key here is to keep your heart rate up and do something that prevents your muscles from being fatigued,” Ludwig says.

Whether it’s a rainy day or a lazy day, try to keep your heart rate up by busting a move. Increase your calorie burn with the interval idea above: Have your playlist alternate between faster and slower songs. You won’t even notice you’re working out!

Finding time to work out on a tight schedule can be rough, but with these exercises, you’ll be able to work out faster than it would take you to come up with an excuse not to!

So, the time has finally come. After months of waiting, worrying and Facebook-stalking sorority girls (it’s okay, we all do it), you’re finally ready for sorority recruitment. But as much as you may have dreamed (and/or freaked out) about this week, you still have no idea what to expect. But this week, you’ll finally get to figure out which house will eventually become your home, and which group of girls will become your sisters. You only get one chance at rush, so it helps to know exactly what you’re getting yourself into before you start, so you can focus on putting your best face forward! To help you rise above all the other rushees, a day-by-day guide to this crazy, crazy week:

What you do

ROUND 1: OPEN HOUSE

A Rho Gamma, or older sorority girl who has temporarily disaffiliated from her chapter to be your guide, will lead you and a bunch of other PNM’s — potential new members — from house to house. When the clock strikes the hour, the door will fly open and you’ll see dozens of sorority girls screaming and dancing. A sorority girl will grab your arm and lead you to a chair. You’ll talk for about five minutes, and then another girl will come over, so you can talk to her instead. This will happen until you have talked to about four girls. After about 20 minutes, the rush chair will make a speech, and you might hear a funny story or do a short activity before you’re ushered out. At the end of the day, you’ll write down which chapters you liked the best and cut a few houses.

ROUND 2: HOUSE TOURS

Round 2 activities vary by school—sometimes it will include a craft, a philanthropy presentation or a skit — but typically it will involve a tour of each house. By this round you have cut some houses, and some houses have cut you, so you go to fewer houses throughout the day and each round is longer, about 40 minutes. You will still talk to more than one girl — usually about three — before taking a tour of the house and learning more about the chapter’s activities and structure. For example, you may hear a presentation on the chapter’s national and local philanthropies, or learn about how much it would cost to live there. Again, you rank the sororities you saw at the end of the day and cut a few more houses.

ROUND 3: SKIT

Again, Round 3 activities vary, and many schools do not do a skit. If your school doesn’t do one, this could be called the “Philanthropy Round," and in some cases house tours are during Round 3. If there is a skit, you will talk to two or three girls before watching the most recent pledge class of each chapter put on a hilarious performance, often involving pop culture references and songs. This is a great chance to get to know the personality of each house, so you can gauge better where you’ll feel most comfortable. You’ll rank the sororities again at the end of the day, leaving you with only three houses.

ROUND 4: PREFERENCE

This round is the most serious, and you only talk to one girl for the entire time — a full hour at most schools. While during every other round the girls dance, cheer and generally try to emphasize the fun aspects of their sororities, in pref round it’s all about the traditions, principles and values of each chapter. You’ll hear from the girls about what their sorority means to them, and see a ceremony that emphasizes the essence of each house. Often there is a presentation involving the seniors, and you learn a lot about the traditions of each chapter. At the end of the day you “pref” three sororities in order of where you’d most like to pledge, and you are matched up through a computer system to a house.

What you wear

ROUND 1

For Round One, you should dress like you’re going out to dinner with your friends: dark jeans or nice leggings, cute flats or boots, and a nice top or sweater. Don’t wear too much jewelry, and avoid low-cut or too-tight tops; you don’t want to look like you’re going clubbing. And take off your watch — nothing says you’re not interested in a conversation like checking the time, and it’s a good idea to just avoid any temptation altogether.

ROUND 2

Round 2 is described as “business casual," but it’s really not a good idea to look too stuffy. A better rule for this round is “family holiday gathering” — conservative, nice but not too fancy. A nice dress with tights, or a skirt with a tucked-in blouse, is perfect for this round. If you wear pants, pair them with a pretty lace or silk top. Also, many girls wear heels this round — you don’t have to, but don’t wear flat or slouchy boots; either go for heels, heeled boots or flats.

ROUND 3

It was suggested that we dress in “business attire” for Round 3, but again, this isn’t really what most girls wear. Don’t think business dinner; think eating at a fancy restaurant with a date. Most girls wear a fancy skirt with a blouse or a silk top, or a dress, and heels. But not too fancy, and certainly not too glitzy or tight — don’t look like you’re going to a party, just look polished and classy.

ROUND 4

The dress code for this round is semiformal, but again, most girls dress a little nicer. Think a bar mitzvah, or a wedding rehearsal dinner. You can’t go wrong with a classy dress! Wear your nicest heels, and, a nice necklace — if you have them, a strand of pearls adds a polished touch.

What you talk about

FIRST TWO ROUNDS

Keep it light. You’ll only be able to talk to each girl for a few minutes, and at first you’ll hear yourself talking about your hometown and your major so much you’ll think you’re going insane. If you can manage it, try to have a more interesting conversation — the girls will remember you and keep you around if your conversation was more interesting than everyone else’s. Bring up something interesting you did over the summer, or a club you’re involved in on campus; it’s an easy way to distinguish yourself and get noticed.

THIRD ROUND

By now, you’ve learned a little about the chapter’s activities, philanthropy and structure, and you may have some questions. Feel free to ask them this round, and also make sure you get more into who you are and what makes you tick, including your activities and goals. Express your feelings about rush and ask questions about sororities in general, but don’t make any overt references to how badly you want to be in a particular chapter or talk about other houses. Through your conversations, you can convince girls that you would fit in at their house.

PREF ROUND

In the last round, the conversation should get a lot heavier. You should talk about what drew you to each chapter, why you think you would fit in there and how you feel about rush in general. Also, show the girls why you’d be an asset to their house by speaking intelligently and displaying your depth — they won’t want to give a bid to anyone who doesn’t seem like they would add a lot to the chapter. This round is to seal the deal — you have one hour to show the girls who you really are and why you should spend the rest of your college experience with them.

WHAT NOT TO SAY

There are three topics that are absolutely off-limits for rush: Boys, Booze and Bids. Gushing about a frat guy that you’re seeing when it turns out the girl who is rushing you used to date him will certainly hurt your chances at being invited back to her house, and bragging about all the shots you downed the night before doesn’t exactly showcase your poise and class to a group of women. But the number one fatal flaw of rush is to talk about other houses, or ask outright if you can get a bid at a particular house. It makes you look desperate, catty and underhanded, and it completely goes against the rules of the Panhellenic Council. Resist temptation — you’ll find out where you belong eventually. Avoid these lethal topics, be prepared and, most importantly, be yourself, and you will end up in a sorority that’s perfect for you!

Whale plays peek-a-boo at the aquarium. [TODAY]

Bedding ideas to brighten up your room! [Racked]

North West makes her modeling debut. [SheFinds]

Unforgettable first date stories. [PopSugar]

11 things people would rather do than have sex. [YourTango]

Predictable trouble for this Dating Naked contestant. [Us Weekly]

Ivy League hazing confessions. [The Huffington Post]

How college kids imagine life in their 30s. [BuzzFeed]

These are the facts men don’t know about women? Wow. [Jezebel]

A sneak peak at the next season of Girls. [New York Magazine]

Yes, we said it: we’re glad summer is over. While we all enjoy a few weeks of hot weather and attempting to tan, there are so many things to look forward to about fall. And to be honest, summer isn’t as great as it’s cracked up to be – we’ve all had that nasty summer frizz or ended up with bad burn lines. Not cool, summer; not cool. So here’s why you should be embracing the change of season and not despairing that the ever-wonderful summer is over.

1. You’re going back to college to see your friends!

2. You don’t have to worry about sunburn anymore.

3. You get to buy a whole new fall wardrobe.

4. It becomes acceptable to stay inside and watch movies all day (Love Actually - need we say more?).

5. Fall is sweater season, and who doesn’t love being cozy?

6.   All of our favorite TV dramas are back – at last!

7.  Shaving your legs becomes less of a priority since we’re no longer wearing shorts.

8.  Football season is back (and so is tailgating!).

9.  No more bikinis = no more worrying about your bikini body.

10.  We’re not going to keep finding sand from the beach in every single one of our pockets.

11.  We don’t have to keep looking at all our friends’ vacation photos on Facebook.

12.  The cool weather makes you much more attractive; sweat doesn’t look pretty on anyone.

13.  You can now snuggle under a blanket by the fireplace.

14.  It’s cool enough to have hot chocolate (especially with marshmallows!).

15.  It's the return of cinnamon, gingerbread, and pumpkin spice lattes at Starbucks, mmmm.

16.  It’s the perfect time for new year’s resolutions for college.

17.  Daylight savings: we finally get to catch up on that lost hour of sleep.

18.  Halloween is only a month away; cue pumpkin carving and an excuse to get dressed up!

19.  We get to pull out those beautiful boots we’ve had to keep in the back of our closets for months.

20.  Fall leaves are the best for jumping in; the crunching noise is the best!

21.  …they also have amazing colors.

22.  Thanksgiving is just round the corner; get excited, collegiettes!

Don’t despair that summer is over – embrace just how great fall is!

It was my junior year of college. I was completely in love and actually living with my (then) boyfriend, Chris. We had officially moved away from the seemingly typical shacking-it-up college couple and were actually playing house. We split the bills and every night I made us dinner. We had made the decision that down the line a sparkly ring, white dress and penguin suit were in our future. A baby fit perfectly into that little dream—later.

Never in a million years did I think going to the doctor over Christmas break for a stomachache would mean finding out I was pregnant. Until reality came into play.

We were poor.
Unmarried.
Still in college.
Jobless.

Not exactly how I pictured my life—especially not with a baby. But I had a decision to make.

I was a practicing Catholic—I had been raised Catholic and had attended Catholic school for most of my life. The “a” word was not something we did. The “a” word was not something that was even a part of the conversation. But could I really be a mother before I turned 21? I was already playing house, so how much harder could adding a baby be? I was able to keep our puppy happy and healthy; I babysat a ton in high school and college, so I wasn’t scared of children. I loved kids, in fact! I knew I could do it. But there was that small voice in the pit of my gut, the one that always seems to say, “What should you really be doing?” My pre-“a”-word mind was constantly saying,“No, don’t even log onto Rue La La, you’re broke.” But things had changed: this time it was saying, “Yes, you’d make it work and be an excellent mother. But are you really, really sure you want to do this? Are you really, really, sure you are prepared?” At this point, I knew I was going to struggle; I felt so selfish. I wasn’t worried about what my sorority sisters would say, or my friends back home, or even my professors. I struggled with what I would tell my baby, if I kept it, about how it came into this world. This was such a charged situation for both Chris and me. We both struggled. We wanted to be independent, but at the same time we wanted to be kids. We wanted to be grown-ups, but I wanted to fully celebrate turning 21 and drinking 21 shots and trying to not puke all over my best friend.

Having a baby at our age would have meant taking a lot of help from others. I think Chris was too proud to let that happen. I knew my parents would help me raise the baby; they would offer emotional and financial support. I knew Chris and I could really do it, if we had to. Chris and I would get married and his parents would help out as well. He was about to graduate from college, so he could get a job quickly, and we could make it work. But, the question became, did we really have to? I, myself, always said I'd never have an abortion, yet there I was, discussing the possibility of one with Chris, every single day.

Since he was raised in a good Catholic family like me, we decided to give ourselves a month before we told our families. Give ourselves time to process. To fight. Freak out. Be happy. Be sad. Make a decision.

During that month, my thoughts drowned me. I couldn't focus on my sister, married, age 30, desperately trying to get pregnant. I couldn't focus on the lessons that the Church had beaten into me for years. I couldn't focus on any of that. So instead I ate chicken queso burritos and thought irrationally. I looked at baby clothes online. I read abortion support group forums.

Chris dealt with it privately. He never really shared his thoughts with me. He simply said,“I support you 100 percent either way. It’s not my body, it’s not fully my choice.” I knew he was a solid man. I knew, from watching him with our dog and the children we knew, that he would be a good father. His father had taught him well. But I also knew he wasn’t ready; he, too, wanted to simply be 22, wild and free.

One of the biggest questions that plagued both Chris and me was how this had happened. I have been on birth control pills since shortly after starting my period at age 15. I would have menstrual pain so bad that I have a prescription for muscle relaxers. I would not be able to get out of bed on rough days during my flow. So I went on birth control at a young age to regulate those issues. But, somehow, I got pregnant. According to my gynecologist, when my family’s insurance starting only covering the generic brand of pills, my hormones fluctuated too much. Generic medication, for some women, doesn’t work. He informed me that I wasn’t the first he’d seen get pregnant while on a generic. Since then I demand, and pay extra, for name brand pills.

My best friend's parents were one year younger than I was when they got pregnant. That always seemed to make its way into my mind. “What if I abort someone's best friend?” Every time I saw, texted or called her when I was pregnant, I thought about that. I know that sounds ridiculous because I was pregnant with my baby. But for some reason, I was able to separate that part out. I was able to think of the baby as not yet my baby, or on some days, not even a baby at all. Except when I was around my best friend. Around my best friend, the baby was someone's best friend. The baby was just like her: a “mistake." Except my best friend was no mistake. She is a wonderful girl, college graduate and gainfully employed. I would think about her mother a lot. I thought about seeking out her advice on the situation, but never did. How would I feel if she wasn't my best friend because 20 years ago, her parents, ages 18 and 19, did what I was considering? To this day, I’ve yet to tell her. I don’t think I ever will. In the end, the way I rationalized it, it was my business, and it would stay my business.

At almost nine weeks, I made my decision. It wasn’t some big dramatic fight between Chris and I. We didn’t even really talk about it. I woke up one morning, very early. I woke him up and just looked at him. He knew, without me saying a word. I don’t think I ever actually said to him the sentence. I think it was just understood. We were going to have a termination. I made a promise to myself that I would not cry after it happened. I would let my life go on, keep my head on straight. I chose to have the in-clinic procedure, as it was less expensive and supposed to be less painful, than using the pills. The in-clinic procedure was also faster. Once Chris and I made the choice, I wanted it over as fast as possible. (I was also starting to have a lot of first trimester symptoms, like wicked morning sickness and cravings, specifically for Lay's potato chips, in the yellow bag.)

I went in on a Friday morning and was released later that day. Chris was silent throughout the entire weekend. It took two to tango, as they say, and it was going to take two to turn off the music. And so he drove me there, as I had been drugged and couldn’t do it alone. There were no protestors outside. No scary crackheads in the lobby. Just a few other women, some with men, some not; some there for the same procedure as mine, some not, but we were all at a women's clinic that specialized in terminations. Yet despite that solidarity, we were all quiet, minding our own business. I vividly remember one girl, flanked by an older woman and a girl around her age, sitting in the corner, sobbing. Everyone let her be, because on the inside, we all knew the exact pain she was feeling. I know I did. It’s the feeling that this is the best thing for you personally, but the nagging fear, that some might not understand, the fear that speaking out means getting called a name or ostracized. Having an abortion isn’t easy, it takes a strong person to survive it, and sometimes people don’t understand that.

I cried during the procedure, not because of what I was doing, but because it hurt so badly. I will spare the details, but let's just say that was one of the most physically painful things I have ever endured. I had a bad reaction to the anesthesia and spent most of the weekend sick. I avoided talking to my parents for the duration of my pregnancy, and didn’t speak to them at all that weekend. Since it was obvious I was still having stomachaches, they were fine letting me be. Chris spoke with them and told them I was violently ill again, but he was taking good care of me. They didn’t question it. Keeping this from them killed me.

As every good Southern girl knows, your parents are some of your best friends. Not sharing this with my Momma still eats at me. I know she would have not judged and would have done everything I needed her to, pre- and post-op. But this was my mess, my situation, my issue, and I was going to handle it on my own. Chris paid for our termination in full. I tried to brush it off and get him to laugh by saying, “At least this is cheaper than 18 years of private schools!” (He didn’t find it funny. I went in the bathroom after and cried.) He didn’t really talk to me much that Friday. Saturday he only kept repeating, “I love you,” over and over. Looking back, I wonder if it was to reassure himself or me. Monday morning, I showered, dressed, and went to class.

Life went on, slowly, but surely. Three weeks later, I turned 21.

To this day, I can count on one hand the number of people that know I was once pregnant. I don't stay silent because I am afraid to tell my story, afraid of what people might think. Instead, I stay silent because it was a tough, personal decision I made. No one made the decision for me; I cannot go back and change it. Even if I could, I would make the same choice. Having an abortion only defined me for a short amount of time.

Never in a million years did I think I would ever want to have sex again. But I got over it. I kept my promise to myself; I let my life go on. It took Chris and me a long while before we were back to “normal,” and it took us both even longer to desire sex again. In fact, the first time he tried after the procedure, I burst into tears. I don't think Chris ever really recovered from it. Not because he was personally against it, but because, he, as I, was raised to be a good Catholic Southerner. Good Catholic Southerners don’t have abortions. I know our relationship never recovered; I also don’t think he ever looked at me the same. He moved out of our apartment that summer when we ended our relationship. I haven't spoken to him in over two years.

I wish him all the best in life. I will forever remember him, not just as my college boyfriend, but as the man that stood behind me during one of the most difficult decisions I have ever made in my life. Maybe one day I will tell my parents what I did. Maybe one day. The biggest question I have unanswered is whether I will tell the man I marry. I have dated since the abortion and the breakup, just as I have had sex since the abortion. I have not told any of the men I've dated. A three-month relationship just doesn't seem like it's substantive enough. Maybe, just maybe, Prince Charming will come, and I'll find myself telling him. For now, I just smile and always remember January 15, 2010 as a day I forever changed. If it weren’t for my abortion that cold January day, I wouldn’t have the inner strength I do now. I smile not because I don’t have a toddler right now; I smile because it taught me a lot about my inner strength and myself. I am a lot of things; this is just a small piece of the whole pie.

On dark days, I think about what my child would be like today. I imagine a precocious little girl with my hair and his smile, playing with her cousins. I can’t think about that too much because what’s done is done. I have made a great life for myself and wouldn’t change a thing. I think the baby would be proud of the things I’ve accomplished.

The day my child would have been born, I took myself out to the nicest restaurant in our town, drank way too much and had dessert. I said a rosary before bed, and I thanked my little experience for turning me off Lay’s potato chips in the yellow bag, forever. My outlook on pregnancy hasn’t changed, not because of what I went through, or what my sisters have gone through during their experiences with my nieces and nephews. I’m still hopeful that Prince Charming and I will have a family, one day. When the time is right.

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Summer is quickly slipping away, meaning the inevitable stress of managing academics, extracurricular activities and a social life will soon be upon us. With so much to balance, it’s very tempting to let nutritious eating, exercise and other healthy habits fall by the wayside. But have no fear, collegiettes! You can keep your body and mind in tiptop shape amid the craziness of college life by making just a few simple commitments. Here are 11 “New Year’s” resolutions you can make that will help you have the healthiest and most fulfilling school year yet.

1. I will work out three days per week.

Spending some time at the gym can do wonders for both your mental and physical health. A workout will make you feel more energized and help you successfully take on your jam-packed days.

Katie Ferraro, a registered dietician and assistant clinical professor at the University of California, San Francisco, and the University of San Diego, says working out will make you feel better. “In addition to all of the calorie burning you can get in, exercise releases endorphins and feelings of pleasure,” she says. “It can be a positive way to deal with stress and depression, as opposed to binge drinking or overeating.” Certified holistic health coach Carly Lockman says cardio also helps release dopamine and serotonin, which help with managing stress – something that surely benefits any college student! 

Ferraro recommends working out at least 150 minutes per week. You can even break the workout down in multiple ways. “Think of working out like your job (or school): You do it five days per week, and at least 30 minutes per day,” Ferraro says. “You can do three 10-minute workouts, five six-minute workouts, or one 30-minute workout.”

Melanie D. Ludwig, a personal trainer and owner of Prestige Fitness Inc., in Manchester, N.H., recommends doing a combination of cardio and weight and resistance training to stay fit and toned. “Muscle mass improves metabolic rate, and if you’re standing better, you’ll feel better and want to do more cardio, so it should be a balance,” she says. “If you’re looking to lose weight, as in body mass, you should make it an even blend of cardio and weight training. If you like one more than the other, force yourself to do the other a couple times a week.”

In figuring out your gym routine, you should always remember to set feasible goals. If you’ve been completely slacking off on going to the gym lately, you won’t want to dive right into doing an intense workout every day. Instead, try doing a couple long workouts per week or more frequent shorter routines and working up from there. “Be realistic and set goals that work for you but that are attainable,” Ferraro says.

Ludwig suggests integrating exercise into your normal routine to make it more fun and convenient for you. “You want to try to fit it in when it’s real,” she says. “There’s nothing wrong with getting on the treadmill with your favorite show if that’s what it takes to motivate you.”

2. I will go to a group fitness class.

If you find it difficult to get to the gym yourself, sign up for a group fitness class with a friend. The commitment to both the class and your friend are great motivators to get you in the mood to exercise! Certified nutrition specialist Jason Boehm recommends any high intensity class. Classes like CrossFit, kickboxing or spinning can all give you a great workout that’ll really make you sweat. Check out your school gym’s website or other local facilities’ websites to find out the options they offer.

In choosing a fitness class, Ludwig recommends going for something that you’ll be likely to enjoy, but also mixing it up once in while to get varied workouts. “For someone who likes Zumba, it’s awesome to do a spinning class once in a while,” she says. “For someone who likes cardio, it’d be great for someone like that to get into circuit training sometimes.”

3. I will run a road race.

Running a road race is a fun way to motivate yourself to keep in shape. The goal of completing the course will help you set up a consistent exercise routine for training. When race day comes around, the motivation will surely keep coming as bystanders cheer for you from the sidelines! Plus, as Ferraro suggests, you can even run on behalf of a charity to give back to others. There couldn’t be a better way to get a runner’s high!

Hillary Coombs, a recent grad of Bryant University and the co-founder and campus correspondent for HC Bryant, ran a half marathon last May. This prompted her to devise a training schedule. “I set a resolution to run two times a week and build up my distance by 0.5 miles each week,” Hillary says. She added that she ran with a friend, which she says helped her stay motivated to keep training.

If you’re a total running newbie, you can try Couch to 5K to get you started. Also, if the thought of running a race seems daunting, you can ease your nerves and spice up the run by participating in a themed event. The Color Run, a 5K race during which runners are covered in colored powder, and the 5K Foam Fest, which features a slew of obstacles sure to get you wet and muddy, are just some of the many fun options out there. You can check out sites such as Road Runners Club of America’s page or Active.com to find races in your area!

4. I will take the stairs instead of the elevator.

With all the stairwells spread in dorms, apartments and class buildings, there are plenty of opportunities to get some exercise without even thinking about it. If you live a few floors up in your apartment or res hall or have a class on the top floor of a building, make a habit of taking the stairs up to your place or classroom instead of using the elevator.

According to the New Hampshire Department of Health and Human Services, a person weighing between 150 and 160 pounds burns about five calories per flight of stairs. There’s no easier way to build a little leg toning into your daily routine! Plus, you won’t have to wait for the elevator and cram yourself in once it arrives. The stairs are a win-win all around!

5. I will join an intramural sports team.

Intramurals have the advantage of letting you get fit while socializing with other students and potentially trying something new. Many teams only practice once a week, so there’s no excuse to not get out there and play for an hour or so! Join a team from your dorm or another organization you’re involved with on campus. You could try out soccer, basketball, ultimate Frisbee or whatever else your school might offer.

Ludwig says the competitiveness of sports, such as tennis, is beneficial for your health and helps you burn calories. “If you’re very competitive, just the adrenaline rush of playing a game for points … will keep you going,” she says.

6. I will cook for myself five times per week.

When you have a busy schedule, it’s probably more appealing to make a quick call to the nearest pizza joint for a delivery order than to whip up something yourself. But while this may be convenient in the short run, it’s going to take a toll on your body (and your wallet!) later on.

Ferraro suggests limiting eating out to one to two times per week and planning out your meals ahead of time so that you’ll always have something healthy on hand when you’re hungry. “You should be making and taking your lunch to work and school, keeping in mind the mantra, ‘If you fail to plan, you plan to fail,’” she says.

Eating in allows you to control what goes into your food, Lockman says. And what you add will be better than what the restaurants are putting in! “Most restaurants focus on using ingredients that are extremely cost effective,” Lockman says. “All too often, these ingredients are highly processed, containing harmful additives and lots of refined sugar.”

When you cook for yourself, whether in an apartment or in your dorm’s kitchen, you also have much better control of your portion sizes than when you eat out. You have every nutrition label at your disposal, so you can be sure to stick to the recommended serving sizes, which are typically much smaller, more appropriate portions than those served at restaurants.

Cassie Brown, an alumna of Wake Forest University, is moving into an apartment with a kitchen this coming year, which she says will give her more say in what she eats. “This year I'm going to try to cut out processed foods and focus on more natural, nutrient-enriched foods,” she says. “For example, I'm going to be eating more quinoa and kale, oats, etc. I'm going to be reading labels more carefully so I can avoid high fructose corn syrup and flour.”

But for those of you who will be living in dorms, there are still options for you to keep up healthy eating habits. Some tips: Ask for whole grain breads at dining hall sandwich stations, steer away from the fried fare and go for salads (but be careful not to pour on too much dressing!), and keep some fruit on hand in your room to help you beat a late night sugar craving.

However, most college students eat out at least sometimes, so when you do, look up the nutrition information of different dishes beforehand if it’s available. What may look like a healthy salad on the menu could actually be loaded with fatty, high-calorie dressings and toppings, so it’s best to know what you’re actually eating!

7. I will watch what I eat late at night.

With the crazy working (and partying) hours typical of college students, you’re bound to get an occasional craving for a late night snack. While eating late isn’t the most ideal habit (Boehm recommends you stop eating three hours before bedtime), you can still make the best of it by watching what you’re munching on.

There are some snacks that are better than others if you’re going to eat soon before turning in for the night. “If you feel that you must eat late, try to avoid sleep disrupters like greasy foods, sugary foods and anything with caffeine or alcohol in it,” Lockman says. “Working to balance your macronutrients (proteins, fats and carbs) in your three large meals throughout the day will cut late night cravings.” In order to do this, try incorporating a combination of important food groups into each of your meals. For example, a peanut butter sandwich on whole grain bread can give you carbs and protein, and a salad with some berries thrown in will give you some much needed servings of fruit and veggies.

You should also pay attention to food and drinks that you may not realize contain sleep disrupters. For example, green tea and chocolate contain caffeine, Ferraro says, so be sure to cut back on those soon before bed, too.

8. I will sleep seven to eight hours per night.

While watching what you eat at night will be sure to help you sleep better, you still need to make sure you’re sleeping enough! Mayo Clinic sleep specialist Timothy Morgenthaler recommends seven to eight hours of sleep per night for adults.

If you know you have to wake up at 8 the next morning, make yourself get into bed by 12 a.m. or 1 a.m. This will be more feasible if you shut down your laptop and silence your phone (or set it to “Do Not Disturb” if you have an iPhone) at least 30 minutes before bedtime so you can help yourself wind down and make sure nobody wakes you with a text as you drift off. Additionally, cut down the time you spend online and on your phone during the day, which will help you get your work done more efficiently and leave you time to relax and prepare yourself for bed in the evening. What’s the best tip for staying focused on your work? Staying energized with exercise and small frequent snacks. See, collegiettes? The secrets to a healthy lifestyle are all interconnected!

9. I will watch what (and how much) I drink.

When you’re back on campus, it’s likely you’ll be kicking back with a drink at least every once in a while. But it’s important to be mindful of what you have. If you’re planning to drink, go for something low in calories and lay off anything loaded with sugar. Long Island iced teas and margaritas, for instance, have more than 700 calories each, so it’s wise to steer clear of those.

A serving of a light beer, red wine or white wine has about 100 calories and a shot of hard liquor contains 80 to 130 calories, depending on the proof (calorie content goes up as the proof increases), so having one or two of these won’t kill your diet.

If you want to add different flavors to your drinks, there are healthier ways to do it! “Rather than mixing alcoholic drinks with soda, I’m going to use club soda, and if I want something sweet I’ll use natural honey,” Cassie says. You can also try squeezing a lemon or lime wedge, or even a grapefruit slice, in your drink for a healthier way to add more flavor.

To make sure you have healthier chasers on hand at a party, plan ahead and bring your own wedge of fruit or low-calorie juice. Naturally flavored seltzer water is another calorie-free mixer or chaser. Check out this article for low-cal drink recipes.

10. I will drink water instead of soda.

There are many good reasons to love water! Ditching the soda and sugary drinks in favor of some H2O will help you stay energized for longer, as soda contains empty calories with no nutritional benefits, so it doesn’t fill you up. The Mayo Clinic recommends that adult women drink about nine cups of water per day.

“Replacing pop or coffee drinks with water is a great resolution,” Lockman says. “This gets you off of the caffeine and sugar ‘roller coaster,’ which is characterized by a rapid increase in energy followed by an extreme crash, and improves daily productivity, as well as mental outlook and clarity.”

Drinking water also results in other health benefits. These include better skin, improved kidney function and calorie control. And don’t forget about all the money you can save by not purchasing expensive soft drinks whenever you go out. You really can’t go wrong with H2O!

11. I will relax for a half hour per day.

With all the hard work you’re putting in during the day, you’ll need to take a break to maintain your sanity. Set aside at least a half hour each day to do something just for the fun of it. Pick up a book you’ve been longing to read, watch an episode of your favorite TV show, go for a walk with a friend, practice that instrument you’ve been neglecting for a while or listen to some tunes on your iPod. Giving yourself a mental break will make you feel energized and ready to work and help you avoid a breakdown later on. Plus, having a break to look forward to will motivate you to concentrate on your work throughout the rest of the day.

Stick to your goals!

There are many approaches you can take to start the “New Year” off in a healthy way, but while making up your resolutions, it’s important to make sure that they fit with your lifestyle. “While I agree that setting objective food and exercise goals works for some people, in other cases it can foment a feeling of failure if and when the goal isn't achieved,” Ferraro says. “It's important to remember that goal setting for weight loss [and health] should be individualized; there is no one-size-fits-all approach.”

If objective goals aren’t for you, there are other useful ways to motivate yourself to stick to your resolutions. Make them with a friend, keep track of them with a weekly journal entry or a sticker chart on your wall, set reminders on your phone or write yourself inspirational notes. Ensure that your resolutions are also enjoyable. “You have to accept yourself for the way you are and be the best you can be by doing things you like,” Ludwig says.

So, collegiettes, set some goals that will make you feel your best and ready to face the demands of school head-on. Have a happy and healthy “New Year”!