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8 Things You Should Never Do at Work

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Transitioning from the back of your lecture hall to your new cubicle isn’t easy! Now that you’re spending most of your day in the same work space, it can be tempting to make yourself comfortable and let some of your professional habits slide. Keep in mind, though, that everything you do is associated with your professional competency. Your new boss will hold you to standards you may not be used to, and adjusting to what’s appropriate could prove to be tricky. As you navigate your new workplace, keep in mind these eight things you should avoid doing at your desk so you can make a good impression!

1. Sending unprofessional emails

Just as you would take the time to proofread a resume before sending it in, make sure your emails are spell-checked and free of any emojis or text abbreviations. Fix any grammar mistakes before hitting send!

Tamara Peters, a career development specialist at Rutgers University Career Services, emphasizes paying attention to your office’s culture and how the employees communicate.

“Watch how other staff members are addressing each other, signing off, and when they usually send emails to each other,” Peters says. “If they’re getting up from their desks and calling or talking to their colleagues, do the same.”

In terms of email structure, keep in mind that being concise is key. You don’t want your boss reading through a long introduction before getting to your real question! The subject line of the email should be as specific as possible so that your boss knows what the issue is as she scrolls through her messages. Include “Urgent:” or “Important:” in the subject if there’s an emergency you need your supervisor to address, but make sure to use it sparingly!

2. Accidentally copying and pasting something embarrassing    

Multitasking online can be difficult! One wrong click can lead to embarrassing mistakes like putting personal information into a work document or clicking send before you’ve finished writing an email. Emily Miethner, founder of FindSpark, a career community for college students and grads, suggests creating different dashboards on Google Chrome. This will allow you to separate bookmarks, tabs and login information between work and personal accounts. If you have a Google account, it’s simple: Sign into Chrome, go to “Settings” on the toolbar and underneath “Users,” click “Add new user.”

“That way, there's less of a chance that you'll even go on a site that you shouldn't be on or log onto a personal profile,” Miethner says. “And seeing the different icons and bookmarks reminds you that you're at work.”

Preventing these problems is also as simple as not multitasking as much, which will result in better quality and proofreading.

3. Not keeping private information confidential   

You’re usually expected to keep company projects confidential, so be careful of whom you share information with, especially online! Keep work emails separate from personal emails and organize them in folders so you always have written word to back you up in case there’s a miscommunication. While it’s unlikely that you’ll run into any serious trouble, you’ll still look professional and show that you take your job seriously.

Miethner recommends bringing up questions about confidentiality when you first get your job contract so you know exactly what is and isn’t appropriate to share with others.

“A lot of interns will have paperwork that includes an NDA, or non-disclosure agreement, but usually they’ll be very broad,” she says. “It’s good to have a conversation early on about exactly what’s confidential and what’s not.” Even if bringing up such a serious topic seems intimidating, Miethner says your boss will likely be impressed that you’re smart and responsible enough to be careful.

If information does get leaked, Miethner suggests going to your boss immediately and being completely honest about everything that was leaked, even if it’s a difficult mistake to admit. That way, those with the power to fix the situation can take the necessary steps as soon as possible so there’s less trouble for you down the road.

4. Being too casual with your boss

Having an easygoing boss is definitely better than dealing with a horrible one, but you can run the same risk of making a bad impression.

“Halfway through my internship, I was on a friendly basis with the editors I reported to and developed a relationship where we joked a lot,” says Lindsey, a formal editorial intern. “However, because I had fallen into that habit, when I later reported to a new editor for an assignment, I accidentally acted buddy-buddy with her before judging her communication style. She reported to my supervisor that I had been unprofessional, and I was so embarrassed that I had acted disrespectful.”

Never forget that you're at work, so make sure you address your boss by her preferred title. Pay special attention if she asks you to call her by her first name since it will show that you’re aware and good at adapting to what’s appropriate. If your boss likes to ask about your weekend, always have an interesting but appropriate story prepared so that you’re not caught off-guard. Miethner says everyone wants to connect, and finding good topics to talk about is a matter of being an active listener.

“It’s important to do more listening than talking at the beginning,” Miethner says. “Take a step back and listen to other people’s conversations to get an idea of what’s appropriate.”

5. Checking your social media accounts 

Diana Martinez, a career coach in the tri-state area, says you should never be signed into a personal social media account when you’re on the job. While some marketing, media and entertainment companies are more lenient with their rules, Martinez recommends sticking by a personal rule to simply put away your phone and log out of your social media accounts unless there’s an emergency.

“It is important not to abuse these liberties,” Martinez says. “Focus on the task that is given to you, and if it includes social media, make sure that you are using departmental accounts, not your own.”

Martinez points out that if you’re focusing on work and looking for new opportunities to shine at your job, you shouldn’t have much time for leisure anyways. In this case, creating separate Google Chrome dashboards, as Miethner suggested, can go a long way in reducing the temptation to give yourself access to any social media accounts, since they won’t be in your tabs or bookmarks.

6. Leaving your documents disorganized

While digital technology has made it much easier to store information, the downside is that interns don’t always take the time to organize their Word documents as they would paper files. Heather R. Huhman, an experienced hiring manager and founder of Come Recommended, a public relations agency for job-seekers, suggests using Google Drive.

“Try to use different folders for your projects, meeting documents and information your boss gives you,” Huhman says. “It’s also a good idea to make sure you keep your documents organized on your desktop in folders that can be easily accessed by you or your supervisor.”

Google Drive is unique because its documents can be shared with other users who can all edit them at the same time. After logging in with your Google account, start by creating a folder labeled “Internship” to keep all your work documents in one place and separate from personal files. For subfolders, it’s best to experiment as you go. Try putting all your projects in one folder at first and then creating separate folders for the ones that require more tasks. If you work closely with other interns, it’s a good idea to start a document where everyone contributes notes about what they’re learning on the job to give one another tips. Huhman says it’s also crucial to keep in mind that you’re organizing for your boss, so use simple and specific labels that everyone can understand.

7. Sitting with bad posture  

It might seem like a minute detail, but slouching in your chair can give the impression that you came to work tired, unfocused and careless. Miethner suggests being more conscious of particular body language signals, such as putting your elbows on your desk or cupping your chin with your hand when you’re talking to someone, since doing so might suggest that you’re not interested in what the other person is saying. Using your hands more when you talk can help you get out of these habits of leaning on your hands and will also make you appear more animated and energetic.

“Changing your body language will help you bring positive energy to work, and it will also make you feel better,” Miethner says. Improving your self-awareness at work in general can also help reduce the number of filler words such as “like” and “um” in your work conversations, which Miethner says will make you seem more mature and professional.

8. Always sticking to your desk  

If you’ve followed all these rules about good behavior at your desk, then the last tip to keep in mind is that it’s also important to not be sitting at your desk the entire time! While your boss will certainly appreciate your quality work, Huhman says an intern should be aware of the opportunities that a company provides.

“If you’re given the opportunity to take a class or attend a company event as an intern, it’s absolutely necessary you take advantage of this chance,” she says.

Peters says that interns who aren’t open to tasks outside of their job description will give a negative impression, so you should seek opportunities for growth whenever possible.

For example, when Mary Grace, a freelance writer at ELLE.com, took a break to get a cupcake at a Cupcake ATM, she asked her boss if she could write about it. Grace’s article got published on ELLE.com, and she impressed her boss in the process.

Getting up from your desk and interacting with your boss and coworkers can be as simple as bringing up an idea or offering to do someone a favor, like getting coffee, because your enthusiasm will be remembered and rewarded down the road.

Many of these tips aren’t obvious to interns at first, so if you’ve made any of these mistakes, remember that it’s not the end of the world! Employers understand that you’re still learning, so it’s best to just own up to your actions and improve next time. Explain why you made the mistake without apologizing excessively, and show how you plan to fix the problem. If you take the right steps, you can turn every bad situation into a learning opportunity. 


Splurge vs. Steal: Which Lipsticks to Spend Your Cash On

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Ever gone lipstick shopping and been at a total loss? Us too. With so many companies making such similar lip colors, it can be near impossible to determine which is actually the best product until after you buy it. That’s why HC enlisted the help of professional makeup artist Stephanie Navarro to help guide us through which products will give us the best bang for our buck. She chose some of her favorite brand-name lipsticks and their drugstore competitors, then judged them on vibrancy, opacity, wearability and price. Check out what she learned so you can find a product worth spending your money on!

1. Sephora ($12.50) vs. NYX Cosmetics ($4)

First up are Sephora’s Color Rouge Cream Lipstick in Valentine 09 – Rich Magenta ($12.50) and NYX Cosmetics’ Extra Creamy Round Lipstick in Chic Red ($4).

The Sephora lipstick is actually Navarro’s all-time favorite, but both of these colors are practically identical. Navarro says that “the Sephora brand has stronger staying power, so [I] rarely touched it up, whereas the NYX lost its vibrancy after a few sips of my skinny margarita.”

The NYX brand is a great option because it’s only $4, but the Sephora brand is the better choice. It’s still pretty inexpensive, and it’s more durable than the NYX color.

Winner: Sephora’s Valentine 09 Rich Magenta Color

2. Stila ($22) vs. Revlon ($10.99)

 

The next products that Navarro tested were Stila Long Wear Liquid Lip Color in Fiery ($22) and Revlon ColorStay Ultimate Liquid Lipstick in Top Tomato ($10.99).

“The packaging is nearly identical,” Navarro says. “Both colors are beautiful, sensual reds, and both get As for color and A+s for wearability! They last throughout the night without drying out the lips too much.”

Navarro suggests carrying a lip balm with you to serve as a refresher for both your lips and your lip color throughout the night. You won’t have to worry much about touchups with the actual lipstick itself, though. Neither of these products fade quickly, and both are super durable.

As for the final verdict, Navarro says, “If you’re looking for a sexy red that you don’t have to babysit, then go with Revlon! It matches the quality of Stila’s long wear liquid lipstick at half the cost.”

The winner: Revlon ColorStay Ultimate Liquid Lipstick in Top Tomato

3. Tarte ($24) vs. Revlon ($9.49)

 

 

Our third comparison is between Tarte’s LipSurgence Matte Lip Tint in Fiery ($24) and Revlon’s ColorBurst Matte Lip Balm in Standout ($9.49).

Visually, these products are extremely similar: they have a similar name and color and the same fat crayon stick packaging. “They both wear amazingly well,” Navarro says. “The opacity and pigment is spot-on, and both will keep for hours without touchups.”

From the outside, it seems the only difference between these two products is the price. However, they are quite different because of their ingredients. “Tarte prides themselves on formulating their products without parabens, mineral oils and phthalates and, more recently, without gluten,” Navarro says.

The best way to decide which lipstick is best for you is to figure out how much the ingredients in your makeup matter to you. “If you’re an ingredient-savvy lipstick junkie, go with Tarte and pay the extra price for a quality, health-conscious product,” Navarro says. “If preservatives don’t phase you, then swipe two of Revlon Matte Balms for the price of one Tarte lipstick!”

Winner: Up to you!

4. MAC ($16) vs. NYX Cosmetics ($4)

The final lipstick showdown is between MAC’s Lipstick in Vegas Volt ($16) and NYX Cosmetics’ Extra Creamy Round Lipstick in Haute Melon ($4).

“Both are beautiful electric coral colors that we’re seeing everywhere this summer,” Navarro says. “I have been loving MAC’s lip colors for years, so I was surprised at how beautiful the pigment was from NYX.”

When Navarro tested them out, she found them to both wear extremely well, with the MAC lipsticks lasting “a bit longer under drinking circumstances.” But when looking for a quick pop of color, go with NYX Cosmetics. The two lipsticks are so similar that you might as well go for the least expensive one!

Winner: NYX Cosmetics’ Extra Creamy Round Lipstick in Haute Melon

Thanks to Navarro’s research and lipstick field tests, buying lipstick just got so much easier. She showed us that it’s okay to splurge on quality products, and also that it's possible to find cheaper products that aren’t cheaper in quality. Ultimately, you want the lipstick that is the best quality for the best price without breaking the bank. 

Witness the Biggest Transformation in Retail History

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A year ago we had an unhealthy obsession with a totally unflattering pair of shorts and a really unprofessional nail-biting habit; cute, right? Needless to say, we’re completely different than we were a year ago (and have thankfully kicked both of those habits to the curb). That transformation got us thinking that Aéropostale’s launch of their new Back to School campaign, “Are you who you were a year ago?,” hits the nail on the head when it comes to collegiettes, especially when our likes and dislikes are changing as quickly as Miley Cyrus’s hair. Seriously, this might be the biggest transformation in retail history (alert Carrie Bradshaw!), and you can be there to witness it!

While our fond memories of Aero mostly coincide with our pre-teen years and Jonas Brothers days, the new Aéropostale has caught up with fashionable collegiettes and is now offering the styles and trends we want to wear. In the words of Aero itself: “You’ve changed, so we’ve changed.”

The re-launch, taking place nationwide on Monday, July 28 from 4:00-6:00 p.m., will involve a total overhaul of the store and will present two brand new lines for shopaholics to fawn over. The first, LIVE LOVE DREAM, is a line of cute and colorful loungewear—cozy enough for Netflix marathons in your dorm room, functional enough to wear to the gym and cute enough to head straight to class in! We’re loving this floral crop top from their new LIVE LOVE DREAM collection!

The second line, AERO NOW, will feature on-trend pieces that reflect the effortlessly cool style of collegiettes on campus and of-the-moment fashionistas. This AERO NOW faded denim jacket is perfect for cool summer nights! Cue #stylecrave.

If you’re as intrigued as we are (chic yet affordable clothes? Yes, please!), you’re in luck! You’re invited to the AERO NOW Back to School campaign reveal and launch event on Monday, July 28th from 4:00-6:00 p.m. at your local Aéropostale store. Shop the event and get 30 percent off any single item* so you can stock your back-to-school wardrobe. You can use the code “Her Campus” at checkout to redeem this special discount for our collegiettes! Don't forget to RSVP at your local Aero and be a part of the NOW generation!

Those. Leggings. We need them.

Given the number of “likes” your weekly #tbt posts get, it’s clear that we collegiettes love seeing how far we’ve come over the years. We’re certainly not who we were a year ago, so why should our wardrobe be?

*Exclusions apply – see store for details.

How to Train For A Mud Run: The Ultimate Way to Get Down & Dirty

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Think a 5K sounds hard?

Try adding 6- to 10-foot walls that you have to climb over. Yards of barbed wire to crawl under. Ropes to climb up. Rivers to swim through (yep, in your running clothes and shoes). Heavy sand bags to haul on your sore shoulders as you run up steep hills. Sweltering fire to leap over. Used cars to sprint on top of. Oh yeah, and the entire course is covered in mud, so you are, too. And so are your clothes, dragging you down like you’re carrying dumbbells in your pockets. But at the end, there’s free beer, music, and the opportunity to say that you survived.

Welcome to a mud run.

What are these crazy things?

A mud run—sometimes called an obstacle race or an adventure race—is, as described by Dan Clark, owner and creator of Gladiator Rock’n Run, a “fire-leaping, mud-slinging, spandex-clinging run from hell with beer.” The runs vary in length depending on the race; some are a standard 5K distance (3.1 miles) while others such as Tough Mudder runs can be up to 12 miles long. While some mud runs are just that—runs with mud on the course—most involve multiple military-style obstacles. Gladiator Rock’n Run has 17 obstacles, while races by The Original Mud Run have anywhere from 30 to 70 obstacles.

Paul Courtaway, president of The Original Mud Run, started the first mud run in the United States in 1989 while he was a marine stationed in California. “We set the race up just to have fun with our families, because we have these huge obstacle courses on the marine bases, but no one could play on them,” he says. Eventually Courtaway got requests to create more mud runs each year, and he started the company The Original Mud Run to reach more people who wanted to exercise and get a little dirty (okay, a LOT dirty) in the process.

“I went to (the Marines) and they taught me that there is no limit to what I can do,” he says. “I thought, ‘What if I could just teach the average guy that?’”

Courtaway says the point of mud runs isn’t to get to the finish line first—it’s to accept the challenge of the run and complete it, no matter how long it takes.

“What I want the races that I build to do is change people’s lives. When they come out there, they need to know that when they finish this they have done something,” he says.

Mud runs are undeniably intense (or even absolutely terrifying, for us less athletic collegiettes), but there’s also a fun community spirit to them. “Everyone participating was so excited to be there! People dress up in crazy costumes, huge crowds cheer you on, there's tons of music, and (there’s) even beer and food,” says HC’s Director of Marketing and Tufts ’11 grad Chelsea Evans, who ran a 5K Warrior Dash.

And although names like “Warrior Dash” and “Spartan Sprint” may conjure images of frighteningly buff gladiators ready to attack, UNC-Chapel Hill recent grad Zahra Mahbooba says her fellow mud run participants were extremely nice. “Random strangers would give me a leg up for climbing the walls, or help me out on obstacles that I couldn't do by myself,” says Zahra, who ran the three-mile Spartan Sprint in March.

Who runs them?

“Anybody who’s gladiator tough” can do a mud run, says Clark of Gladiator Rock’n Run, but typically participants must be a certain age (it varies among races, but usually at least 14 years old) and sign a waiver to certify that they are physically fit enough and aware of the potential risks. So who exactly is “gladiator tough” enough to do a mud run? You guessed it—collegiettes! Courtaway says 18- to 28-year-old women make up 26 percent of runners for The Original Mud Run, making them the group with the most participants.

“Our demographic works very well in the collegiate scene. They want something out of the ordinary that not everybody does every weekend,” Courtaway says. The community service aspect of mud runs (many runs donate money to charities) makes them popular with sororities and fraternities, he says.

The Original Mud Run isn’t the only obstacle race with a ton of collegiette participants; Clark says that the majority of Gladiator Rock’n Run participants are often female. “That’s the thing that surprises me the most, is how badass all the girls are across the country,” he says.

Both Zahra and Chelsea said they found out about their mud runs through a LivingSocial deal. “I guess I just wanted to take a risk/try something new and the LivingSocial deal was the perfect excuse!” says Chelsea.

If you’re going to get muddy and jump over fires, it’ll be more fun with friends to encourage you along the way, right? Kathleen Kalinsky, a collegiette from JMU, ran the World Famous Mud Run in June with her friend. “When I told my friend about this one, she was just as on board as I was and we decided it was time to get a little dirty while doing something we both loved!” she says.

About 65 percent of Gladiator Rock’n Run participants run as a group, Clark says. “There’s a couple of obstacles that you can’t do by yourself; they have to get somebody to help them. We really promote teamwork, not leaving anybody behind,” he says.

How do you train for a mud run?

So you want to do a mud run? It’s not enough to just be able to run the distance of your race. When you’re hauling sand bags on your back and climbing up 10-foot walls, you’re going to need more than just leg strength to get you through. Most courses include running, swimming, crawling, and climbing, so it’s important to consider total body fitness when you train for a mud run.

“Fast runners with skinny arms don’t do well, and super strong guys with just big muscles don’t do well. It’s the people in between that are total body conditioned that are great,” says Courtaway. “Total body fitness is the most important thing, starting with core strength, upper body strength, cardiovascular fitness, and overall weight training to give yourself the opportunity to complete all of the obstacles.”

Chelsea says she trained for her race by taking CrossFit classes, which combine cardio and strength training. CrossFit involves a series of 15-minute exercises such as jump roping, box jumps, and shoulder presses. Chelsea, who could already run three miles when she started training, also ran twice a week and worked up to running five or more miles at a time (which took her about two weeks) to make sure she could do the entire race distance. However, she wished she had run more hills during her preparation: “The 5K was mostly uphill so it was harder than I thought it would be—I would definitely practice running uphill before the race!”

If you’re a newbie runner interested in doing a mud run, it’s best to start off with a race that is 5K or shorter. For an easy-to-follow 5K training plan, check out this Her Campus article. However, keep in mind that you shouldn’t expect to run 3.1 miles—or even one mile, for that matter—your first time running, so don’t push yourself too hard, and understand that it can take weeks to months to work up to running a 5K. Running too much too soon can cause injury. Make sure that you consult HC’s Beginner’s Guide to Running before you start running for an easy-to-follow running schedule and other important tips.

But while running should be an important part of your training game plan, strength training is an integral part of mud run success. If you’re like many collegiettes who rarely stray from the elliptical machine at the gym, check out HC’s introduction to weight training to get a few strengthening exercise ideas. LIVESTRONG.COM also has great exercises for upper body strength training and core strength training.

Don’t worry—training for a mud run doesn’t always have to be serious and intense! Zahra said that aside from running three times a week to train for the Spartan Sprint, she also went rock climbing one to two times a week and played soccer and ultimate Frisbee with her friends for fun, incorporating a little extra cardio and arm exercise into her weekly routine (sneaky exercise is the best kind).

It’s important to know what you’re up against in the run. For example, if there is a swimming portion of a race, Courtaway suggests trying to swim in shoes and shorts, since that’s what you’ll most likely be wearing on race day. Also, many races will have descriptions of obstacles on their websites (although they often have “mystery obstacles” that will be surprises on the course) so you can decide how best to prepare for them. The Original Mud Run website even has tips for the best ways to train for and conquer some of their obstacles, and The Warrior Dash website has videos that can help you train for their race.

“You have to cross-train,” advises Clark. “There’s a rope climb, so you have to go do laps on a rope climb. There’s the basic running, so you gotta go run. There’s crawling in puddles, so you have to work those muscles that help you crawl.”

But what’s more important than having the physical strength to complete a mud run is having the mental strength, Clark says: “It’s for everybody, but it’s not for the timid or meek.”

Race Day Tips

This isn’t going to be your standard 5K—that’s pretty apparent. So what are the best things to do to make sure you have an awesome race day in the mud?

  • Wear tight clothing—NOT a baggy T-shirt. “Once your clothes get covered in mud they're like 20 pounds heavier and your shorts start to fall down while you're running,” says Zahra. Kathleen agrees: “The water and mud weigh you down with T-shirts, trust me!”
  • Wear old shoes you’re okay with throwing away. “Me and the other three people I ran the Spartan race with all left our shoes at the race because they were too dirty to bring back,” says Zahra.
  • If you can’t do an obstacle, go around it. The point of a mud run is for you to push yourself, but there is a limit—you need to be safe. If you feel that you can’t do an obstacle in the course, it’s perfectly okay to go around it. Just be aware that you might not be eligible for some of the race’s prizes. “We think safety is obviously the most important thing,” says Courtaway. “We want to give you the option always to say: ‘I can’t do this, I’m not going to.’” Plus it’ll give you more motivation to train so you can do it next time!
  • Have fun! There’s mud, music, crazy costumes, and (for those over 21) beer—how could you not have a great time? “It was honestly the most fun I've had so far this summer!” Chelsea says of running the Warrior Dash. Chelsea, Zahra, and Kathleen all say they had a blast doing their mud runs and are planning on running another in the future. “There is nothing more rewarding than crossing the finish line,” says Kathleen.

Ready, Set, Get Dirty!

Feel up to the muddy challenge? Check out some of our favorite mud run sites to see if there’s an event coming up near you!

  • Gladiator Rock’n Run: 5K race; 17 obstacles. Must be 14 years or older to participate.
  • The Original Mud Run: Races between 5K and 10K; 30-70 obstacles. Minimum age to participate varies depending on location.
  • Spartan Race: 3+ miles; 15+ obstacles. Races are in the U.S., United Kingdom, and Canada. Must be at least 14 years old for U.S. and western Canada races and at least 15 years old for U.K. and eastern Canada races. Maximum age is 99 years old.
  • Tough Mudder: Races between 10K and 12K; obstacles vary depending on location. Races are in the U.S., Canada, Europe, Japan, South Africa, Australia, and New Zealand. Must be at least 18 years old to participate in U.S. races and 19 years old to participate in Canadian races.
  • Warrior Dash: 5K race; number of obstacles depends on race location. Races are in the U.S., United Kingdom, and Australia. Must be 14 years or older to participate.

They’re dirty, they’re sweaty, and they’re a whole lot of fun (not to mention great exercise). So get out there and conquer a mud run, collegiettes—and make sure someone takes pictures for you, because what’s cooler than a Facebook picture of you jumping over fire?

 

What do you think, collegiettes? Does a mud run sound crazy fun or just plain crazy? Let us know in a comment below!

9 Things That Qualify as Meals in College

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With busy schedules, small bank accounts and a serious lack of desire to use the stove, eating regular meals (let alone at regular times) is pretty much impossible. Here are nine things we eat in college that would never qualify as actual meals in the real world

1. Starbucks

Frappuccinos have whipped cream. Pie has whipped cream. Pie is food. Therefore, Frappuccinos are food (right?).

2. Cookie dough

Best eaten right out of the tub with a spoon. 

3. Day-old pizza

Because your roommate ordered it last night and you're too lazy to make yourself breakfast. 

4. Cereal

For some reason, Froot Loops just taste better after 8 p.m.

5. Ramen noodles

There's a reason why "broke college student" is more than just a stereotype. 

6. Wine

Because, why not?

7. Ice cream

We love our girls, but our two best friends will always be Ben and Jerry.

8. Dining-hall waffles

Even better? Ice cream ON your dining-hall waffles. 

9. Kraft mac and cheese

For those times when we want to pretend we're in kindergarten again and eat pasta shaped like Spongebob. 

Real Live College Guy Dale: He Never Says ‘Thank You’

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We all need a little guidance now and then, so whether you’re stressed about a fling gone wrong, a recently wrecked relationship or how to handle a stage-five clinger, Real Live College Guy Dale is here to help you navigate the college dating scene.

How do I get my boyfriend to appreciate me? I cook for him, clean up after him and do so many other things for him, but he very rarely says “thank you” and continuously asks me to do more. – Feeling Unappreciated at Furman

Furman,

From my point of view, you’ve got one way of handling this situation:

Just stop doing things for him. Let the dishes pile up and the dust accumulate. Don’t take the trash out, don’t do his laundry and don’t even bother cooking dinner for anyone but yourself. He will eventually take notice and he will eventually say something. When he brings up how dirty everything is, just lay it out for him: You got tired of working so hard and receiving no appreciation. Tell him you feel unappreciated because you do all these things and he can’t even be bothered to say “thank you.”

Basically, you just communicate your issues. While I feel like I should tell you not to launch a verbal assault (because if he feels attacked then the issue’s going to blow up into a huge argument), I think you do need to be straight with him. Don’t let him jerk your around by saying stuff like, “Oh, I thought you liked doing it!” He won’t learn unless you really spell things out for him. You need to put your foot down.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Guys aren’t mind readers. We kind of know when something’s wrong, but we can’t always pinpoint what it is. Your boyfriend may very well think that you just enjoy cleaning up after him (as idiotic as his assumption might seem). If you don’t tell him how you’re feeling, he won’t know. If he never finds out, nothing is ever going to change, and you’re going to get stuck with always cleaning up after him.

Fill out my online form.

Links We Love 7.27.14

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Books to read while lying on the beach. [TresSugar]

Teach your kitchen tools new tricks. [Spoon University]

10 things we wish we’d learned in sex ed. [Your Tango]

Women feel threatened by peers wearing red. [Newser]

The ultimate full-body kettlebell workout. [Greatist]

Jobs where you’ll help shape the future. [The Muse]

The world’s best female fighter loves to be hated. [The New Yorker]

50 thoughts we had while watching the 50 Shades of Grey trailer. [BuzzFeed]

Awesome paid iPhone apps that are currently free. [Yahoo]

9 questions about the Israel-Palestine conflict you were too embarrassed to ask. [Vox]

 

Real Live College Guy Sean: Am I in the Friend Zone?

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Broke from calling late night love lines for advice? Looking for the lowdown on the hoedown when it comes to college guys? Real Live College Guy Sean is here to help you pick apart the mind of the average college guy. Whether it’s avoiding that awkward weekend hook-up or full-on relationship advice, Sean is here to save the day!

I chill with this guy who lives down the street from me basically every day. We mostly hang out alone, but sometimes with my other guy friends. He texts me first 90 percent of the time and is always down to hang out, but he never stays too long and he never makes a move! I have a huge crush on him, but I can't make the first move because I'm always too nervous and unsure. Have I been friend-zoned, or is he too nervous to make a move as well? How can I tell if he's into me without being too aggressive and scaring him? – Misled at Marymount Manhattan

Misled,

First things first––relax! It sounds like you’re in a good place and I wouldn’t say you’ve waited too long. Plus, as a general rule, guys who text you first “90 percent of the time” are probably into you. Depending on how daring you are, perhaps think about making the first move! No one is perfect, but if the opportunity arises, why not go for it? I’ve always said that I’d rather live with rejection than regret. Plus, guys love when girls are the ones to make a move. It’s an awesome change of pace and it shows that you’re into a relationship as much as we are. As a bonus, we also can stop worrying about timing if you take a big leap.

I also don’t think that you’ve been friend-zoned… yet. More commonly, guys will hang around and comfortably play along when we’re unsure of how you feel about getting romantic. However, there is a limit to how long we’ll wait around before it starts to get old. Unless you meet a guy who enjoys flirting for sport (who knows? They probably exist…), it’s time to take action. When you’re together and you laugh at one of his jokes, playfully punch him on the shoulder or the knee. Introduce touch to your relationship and watch how he reacts. If he’s uncomfortable, you’ll likely see it in his face. He’ll probably change the subject or look away.

I’d suspect that, as you said, this guy is a bit nervous. Next time you hang out, try doing something he enjoys so he’s not as anxious. Does he love seeing live acts? See if one of his favorite bands is in town. Is he a big golfer? Why not follow him onto the course? Is he a skydiver? Well, you’re on your own there. The point is if you guys hang out doing something he’s passionate about, he’s less likely to be nervous around you.

You haven’t been friend-zoned until he starts calling you “bro” or says you’re “like his sister.” And since this hasn’t begun, you still have time to prevent it from happening. As I mentioned earlier, touch will go a long way in showing genuine interest. Unfortunately, this is also where guys begin to worry about the friend zone.  However, if you introduce playful touch to your conversations, it won’t be long before you’ll either gain the courage to make a move, or he will make one, since he’ll be curious to see if you’ll reciprocate.

Fill out my online form.

Tyra Banks' 11 Craziest Moments on 'America's Next Top Model'

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We love watching America's Next Top Model for the fierce photo shoots and model drama, but the real star of the show is Tyra Banks and her hilariously crazy antics. Here are Tyra's 11 craziest ANTM moments of all time!

1. When she pretended to faint before an acting challenge.

"Don't worry, girls; I was just ACTING!" 

2. When she wore a tiara and recreated Snow White.

No one does theatrical like Tyra Banks. 

3. When she turned into the Hulk.

Tyra ANGRY!

4. When this happened.

We are all Miss J. 

5. When she twerked on a table at panel.

Even before Miley made twerking mainstream, Tyra was doing her thang (on a table). 

6. When she explained the meaning of "fierce."

Tyra's favorite word of all time. 

7. When she made up words like "pot ledom."

"Top Model" backwards, obviously. 

8. When she made this face.

You gotta give the girl credit; she goes for it. 

9. When she pretended to be British... in almost every episode. 

Because what better way to spice up an elimination than with a fake accent? 

10. When she completely lost it and screamed at Tiffany during panel.

Aka the most memorable moment in ANTM history. 

11. When she imitated herself screaming at Tiffany.

Just as traumatizing the second time around. 

Her Story: I Quit My Job To Travel Around South America

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Over the last four weeks, I have straddled the equator line, zip-lined through a rainforest on the edge of the Amazon and climbed to 15,780 feet above sea level on Cotopaxi, one of the highest active volcanoes in the world. I took 80 hours of intensive Spanish, learned how to make Ecuadorian soup with shrimp and plantain "meatballs" and had my first fluid and coherent conversation in another language.

But six months ago, I was sitting in a cubicle at a desk job in relative misery, anxious, heartbroken and depressed. So let me start from the beginning.

I went to college at Northeastern University, a school I immediately fell in love with because of its co-operative education program: an opportunity to spend six months working full-time in your field in between academic semesters. As an avid writer with my heart set on a journalism career, I knew the key to success in my field was gaining all the clips and experience I could get.

So over five years, I participated in three co-ops – at a small neighborhood newspaper, an IT media company and for The Boston Globe’s Boston.com. On the side, I co-founded and helped run the Northeastern chapter of Her Campus and was in charge of the extensive tour guide program at my university. I was career-driven and determined to write as much as I could. I even gave up a traditional semester abroad (which I was dying to do) because I wouldn't have been able to interview for a senior year co-op position.

As the end of my college years loomed, I used my co-op connections to my advantage and started a job immediately after graduation at TechTarget, the IT media company where I'd done my second co-op. A few months later, a nightlife blogging position opened at Boston.com, and I took the blog on as my second job.

I worked meticulously at both jobs for a year. Don't get me wrong - I was incredibly thankful for my jobs. I knew how lucky I was to be employed not just by one employer, but two. But in the span of that year, I'd faced two rough heartbreaks and was feeling antsy and anxious. I couldn't believe this was "it" - the rest of my life. I wanted to travel and see the world, and I felt stuck and depressed.

Everyone told me to wait it out. "First jobs are never perfect; the adjustment to the real world is really hard," they'd say. "Heartbreak just heals with time." But I knew it was something more than that.

So I started brainstorming and saving every penny I could, adding it to the savings account I’d built up over the last several years. I dreamed of a trip to Europe, a re-location to NYC. I contemplated applying for other jobs, even moving back home to Los Angeles. But in May, the stars aligned.  One of my best friends from high school, who had been living in Chile for just over two years, was quitting her job in Santiago to relocate to NYC. Before she left, she was hoping to do some traveling through South America. Her sister was also quitting her job and starting graduate school in the fall, so the three of us made plans for a jaunt to Argentina and Uruguay.

With shaky hands and tears in my eyes, I took a huge risk – one that many people warned me against – and gave my boss my two weeks notice. It was one of the hardest and best things I have ever done.

My father’s proudest moment was when I, his only daughter, graduated from university. But not because I finally had a diploma in hand. It was because I graduated with a job offer, and he knew that I wasn’t one of the many recent grads who would be forced to move back home and desperately seek work. I was employed, and to him, that was success. So you can imagine his reaction when I told him I wanted to throw all of that away to go see the world. Thankfully, my Mom was a little more supportive. She understood the depression and frustration I was going through, and though she wanted me to remain on the same continent, she understood I was feeling restless.

That being said, I’ve always been independent. I moved across the country at the age of 18, and have been living on my own for six years. I knew my parents would love me no matter what, and so despite my father’s disappointment, I took the risk.

I don’t think I know a single person who doesn’t say one of their life goals is to travel and see the world. But how many people really do just that? How many people quit their jobs, leave their worldly possessions, pick up their lives, and just go? Too few.

That being said, most American teenagers and young adults who do take a gap year, or gap months, dream of backpacking through Europe. They talk of buying Eurorail passes and seeing Paris, Amsterdam and Rome, of taking a summer off to explore the Grecian isles. And while there's nothing wrong with that, let me start by saying that South America is half the price. Europe is expensive and glamorous, with amazing meals to be had and expensive hotels to stay in. Everything in South America is, bottom line, cheap. It's meant to be roughed through -- living on $30 a day here is no problem, and taking buses across borders for $10 each is as easy as ordering the menu de dia – the daily lunch menu of fresh juice, soup, and a main course for as little as $2.50.

I immediately fell in love with South America. But after six weeks in the southern hemisphere -- three with my friend and her sister and three on my own in Peru and Bolivia -- I got on a plane bound for Los Angeles, not ready to leave. My plan when I returned to the US was to face the real world again: work my butt off to get a job in NYC, sign a lease, and make the next steps in my journalism career.

But as I reunited with my family and friends back home and contemplated beginning my life again across the country, I just couldn't stand the thought. My career-driven self had a brand new thought: I have my whole life to work. Why wouldn't I go see the world now, when my only physical obligation was $98 a month to the UHaul in Middletown, Connecticut where my mattress and boxes sat in storage?

So that's exactly what I did. I planned three months of solo travel in South America. The first month would be spent on a traveling classroom program through Ecuador, taking 20 hours of Spanish classes a week and staying with local, Ecuadorian families to hone my speaking skills. The next two months would consist of making my way down the coast of Peru, into Bolivia, down through northwestern Argentina, and finally into Chile, where my return flight to Los Angeles is booked from Santiago.

For the most part, my family and friends reacted well. My Dad was still hesitant about my decision, but at that point I’d already given up my job, so he simply shrugged and said, “It’s your money, honey.” Mostly it was my parents’ friends, my older family friends, who reacted so positively, which really solidified my decision. “Good for you!” they’d say. “Now’s the time to go, when you’re young and have nothing tying you down.” My own friends reacted with just as much enthusiasm, sending emails, Facebook posts and g-chats about how jealous they were that I was “living the life” and seeing the world.

Making the decision to pause my life and see one of the most spectacular, and underrated, continents of the world has been the best decision I’ve ever made. Sure, I miss my parents and my friends. Sure, I wish I wasn’t scraping every penny out of my savings account. And trust me, living out of a backpack with eight outfit options doesn’t exactly appeal to my inner fashionista. But I know the comforts of home -- a guaranteed hot shower, all my favorite outfits and a refrigerator to call my own, not to mention my true friends and family -- aren’t going anywhere. As I face challenges small and large: bug bites swollen to the size of my fists, misunderstood bus schedules, insanely challenging hikes and horrifically bad maps, I’m learning more about myself than I could have even imagined.

Looking back to when I was just out of a three-year relationship and struggling desperately to come to terms with my new single status, one of my old bosses told me this: "You’re the only guaranteed and stable partner you’ll have for the entirety of your life.” I didn’t want to listen to her then, but as the years have passed, those words ring truer now than ever. Of course, having someone next to you is a wonderful way to travel, and a huge comfort. But the bottom line is that I am secure and comfortable with myself, and I know that, if need be, I can face whatever challenge comes my way on my own. It’s one of the most incredible feelings in the world. What better way to achieve that goal than by seeing the beauty of the world?

You can read more about Rachel’s South American adventures in her personal blog, at blog.rachelkossman.com

Do you have a story to share? Submit your story to Her Story!

4 Ways to Get to Know Your Random Roomie Before Move-in

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Meeting your roommate for the first time can be a nerve-wracking experience. Having a random roommate invites the possibility of spending an entire year with someone who might be your new best friend or just someone who sleeps in the other bed. Luckily, HC is here to provide you with a few tips on getting to know your roomie before it’s time to move in!

1. Talk on the phone or Skype

By talking on the phone, Skyping, or FaceTiming with your roommate, you’ll have the opportunity to get to know a few things about her before moving in.

For Julia Flaherty, a senior at the University of Wisconsin-Stevens Point, a quick and simple phone conversation worked out well. “It’s a great tradition that should be kept up,” she says. “You kind of play a journalist role in getting to know each other and asking each other questions.” Don’t be afraid to pick up the phone to break the ice!

2. Go out to lunch

What better way to bond with your roommate than to do it over your mutual love of food? If distance isn’t an issue for you and your new roomie, try out a new restaurant in your hometown or even where you’ll be going to school. Everyone loves to eat, and nothing brings two people together better than a meal.

“I was really nervous about moving to New York not knowing anybody, but then I found out that my future roommate and I both lived near each other,” says Amber, a junior at Columbia University. “We ended up setting up a little brunch date to get to know each other, and it definitely helped us bond a little before we got to New York.”

A simple lunch or dinner date can give the two of you a chance to learn about each other’s majors, where you’re from and what types of things you like to do to have fun. It’s also a way to keep things short and sweet just in case you run out of things to talk about!

3. Follow each other on social media

Social media is a great option for getting to know your roommates when distance is in the way. Whether you add each other on Facebook or follow each other on Twitter, social media can be a great way for you to be introduced to the type of person your roommate is.

“My roommate and our suitemates were random, and we were all over the place geographically,” says Sam LaFrance, a junior at George Washington University. “We started a group Facebook message to talk about cleaning and things, but we also used it to get to know each other. We also shared Twitters and Tumblrs, and we all ended up hitting it off pretty well.”

4. Attend a pre-college event together

A lot of schools have pre-college events for freshmen to give them a chance to get a feel for college life while getting to know the people in their class. An event like this is also a great way for you and your roommate to get to know other people together while also getting an idea of the types of people you both like to hang out with.

Ashley Gibbs, a junior at Duke University, attended her school’s Black Student Alliance Invitational with her current roommate during their senior year of high school. “When we went, we met all of the other ethnic students that were accepted to Duke,” she says. “She was my roommate for the weekend, and we went to all the parties together. Overall, we had a pretty good experience together freshman year … we’re still roommates to this day.”

Your relationship with your roommate can have a pretty big effect on your freshman experience, so it’s important that the two of you have a pretty good relationship with each other. You don’t have to end up being best friends in the end, but you can at least put forth the effort to get to know each other before you arrive on campus!

The Intern Workout Plan: 5 Tasks That Double as Workouts

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We’re going to let you in on a little secret: being an intern is hard work.  Between the long hours and the endless menial tasks that you needed to complete, like, an hour ago, you’re sometimes too busy to even hit the gym! But wait a second; doesn’t it feel like your day is jam-packed with several tiny exercises? You’re always squatting to pack that box, running to get your boss coffee, and carrying heavy garment bags throughout a bustling metropolis, just to name a few. Kanye may have his own workout plan, but at Her Campus, we’re all about “The Internship Workout Plan.” We haven’t backed this up with science just yet, but we’re pretty sure you may turn into a star intern with a fit bod to boot if you follow these steps correctly.

1. Lifting Boxes

Who needs dumbbells when you have a stack of papers or several shopping bags? Whether you’re carrying garment bags back to the fashion closet or handing over those boxes to the UPS deliveryman, your internship may require some heavy lifting. But it’s okay; you’ve always wanted arms that could compete with Michelle Obama’s muscles.  “I had to pack up heavy files into boxes and stack the boxes up,” recalls Jillian Sandler, a recent graduate of Northwestern who interned at a hospital one summer. “I think I gained some arm muscle after that!”

While anyone with some upper body strength can pick up a box, it’s important to know how to safely lift heavy objects. It seems silly to be so preoccupied with how you lift that bag, but it’ll be pretty awkward if you throw out your back at your internship. “Back straight, bend your knees, and think about holding the items close to your body,” says Andrea Metcalf, fitness expert and author of Naked Fitness. Don’t forget to show off the results of your heavy lifting in a cute tank or sleeveless dress!

2. Walking Quickly

Every intern knows that fast walking is the key to success. If you haven’t had a walking meeting with your supervisor—or frantically followed your boss around as he or she lists off a slew of tasks to complete—you’ve probably sprinted to Starbucks to get your employer some coffee. If you’re like Allie Sutherland, a collegiette from Syracuse University, you may be rushing to do your boss a personal favor. “The [interior] designer I worked under had a flight to catch for her best friend’s wedding, and [she] forgot to pick up her dress from the tailor 30 city blocks south of the office and shoes from another place in between,” says Allie. “She sent me to do the pickups, so I walked both ways.” 

For a healthy heart, the American Heart Association recommends 30 minutes of moderate-intensity cardio five times a week. “[Walking fast] isn’t especially great for weight loss, but it can be for the beginners who weren’t doing any activity,” says Debi Silber, author of A Pocket Full of Mojo: 365 Proven Strategies To Create Your Ultimate Body, Mind, Image and Lifestyle. Though this mini workout isn’t as intense as that spin class you take with your sorority sisters, it’s that daily dose of cardio the American Heart Association calls for.

Going to get coffee isn’t a very strenuous errand, but you’re going to be in a lot of pain if you’re running around in heels all day. “Walk around in sneakers and change [your shoes] at work so it’s better support for [your feet],” suggests Erica Kasan from Pennsylvania State University, who was a fashion intern at Marie Claire. By leaving the heels at the office, you won’t be in excruciating pain by noon. And if your feet aren’t killing you, you’ll be more willing to pick up your boss’s heels before the shoe repair store closes. Translation? Star intern status. Is it just us, or did running those random tasks just become a thousand times more appealing?

3. Squatting

Though you may fall victim to the sorority squat in a photo every now and then, the intern squat is on another level. From organizing the filing cabinet to packing up a box (which you will then correctly lift, right?), you may find yourself squatting a lot. But, according to our experts, this exercise is more complicated than simply bending your knees. “Leverage is the most important,” says Silber. “With correct form, it’s possible to use all muscle groups: lower body for bending, core for stabilizing, and upper body for lifting.”

So how can you get the most out of your intern squat? “Be sure to have your weight through your heels, bending into a 90 degree angle where the knees are safely above the heels [instead of] the toes,” Silber advises. “Glutes should be pushed out far behind, as if you were to sit in a chair that’s very far behind you.” Once your internship is over, you can show off your perfected squats at your school’s gym.

4. Climbing the Stairs

Whenever you went to the gym, you always gravitated away from the StairMaster, and after a few weeks at your internship, you finally understand why. Whether you’re climbing the stairs in the subway or running up the escalator because you’re a little late to work (it’s okay, we won’t tell), you’re completely out of breath and a little sweaty. “The subway stairs are the equivalent to the StairMaster,” says Erica, who took the subway to pick up and drop off clothing samples at her internship.

But this fierce exercise does have a slew of perks. “Climbing the stairs works your largest muscle groups—quads, glutes, hamstrings, and calves—so your heart rate goes [up]; you’re burning fat and calories as you’re toning your lower body,” Silber says. Even if you’re not running late, channel your inner fitness queen and walk up the escalator. It sounds crazy, but you will see results. “It’s great cardio and a high intensity interval training (HIIT) workout,” Silber says. Plus, cutting out the passive escalator ride will show your colleagues and supervisors that you’re enthusiastic about the internship and ready to get back to work. After a few weeks, the StairMaster at your gym won’t look so intimidating.

5. Standing

As every intern knows, it’s important to always look like you’re busy (even if you’re simply putting something in the filing cabinet). Whether you’re organizing the fashion closet or checking inventory in the supply closet, you may end up being on your feet all day. Foot aches and daydreams about lounging on a cozy sofa aside, standing is better for you than sitting. “Our bodies want to move,” explains Silber. “When we’re sitting all day, we lose muscle mass, which lowers our metabolism and leads to weight gain.” We know what you’re thinking: you’ll definitely find a reason to stand up now!

But what’s a collegiette to do if she’s swamped with work at her desk all day? Give our favorite cubicle-approved exercises a go. Try not to make too much of a scene, though—it’d be a little uncomfortable if your boss caught you using your chair as a makeshift incline bench!

Lifting a single box or going on one errand won’t magically turn you into a fit, superstar intern. So what will? Repetition, repetition, repetition! In addition to scoring a toned body, doing these tiny tasks often will show your boss that you’re enthusiastic about being at the office and ready to help however you can. How’s that for killing two birds with one stone?

The 17 Away Messages You Totally Used on AIM

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In an era where Razrs were the hot phone on the market and dial-up internet was still totally a thing, your AIM away message defined you almost as much as your choice of boy band (will the *NSYNC vs. Backstreet Boys debate ever TRULY be settled?). With no Twitter, Instagram or Snapchat Story to keep your friends up-to-date on your every move, your AIM away message was your go-to way to communicate with your many AIM friends, along with a few notorious robots (SmarterChild, anyone?). 

The things we posted in our away messages were ALMOST as embarrassing as our deep-rooted love for gaucho pants, but, as we’re sure you once posted in an away message, "Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days - Hannah Montana." 

Here are 17 totally classic AIM away messages that you definitely posted back in your instant-messaging days. 

1. BRB showering...

Just in case the love of your life IMs you in the next 20 minutes and is offended by your lack of response.

2. ~*Profile currently under construction*~ 

You couldn’t let people think you just had a blank profile! How embarrassing.

3. I have the best friends! MD, GH, BL, MP, ST, NL, CR, AT, RE, BM and everyone else. You know who you are <33333333

Because in sixth grade you had to let everyone know how TRULY popular you were.

4. Movies w/ Rachel, then getting our nails done, then doctor’s appointment, then dinner, then bed :)

Who said play-by-plays are strictly for sports?

5. %n is so ugly, right?! 

The original Internet trolling.

6. Hey %n, why are you looking at my profile at %t??

Just when they thought they had learned all your tricks, you fooled them yet again!

7. LiFe'S nOt AbOuT tHe BrEaThS wE tAkE, bUt ThE mOmEnTs ThAt TaKe OuR bReAtH aWaY ~~~~

For those days when you had to let everyone know how deep and inspirational you were.

8. So0o0o bored, someone IM me. 

By “someone” you meant the cute boy from your P.E. class. Obvi.

9. Sister needs the comp for hw :/ BBL 

The cute boy from your P.E. class JUST IMed you right when your sister suddenly needed the computer. WHY IS SHE RUINING YOUR LIFE?!

10. New SN! Add me: xX_heyyyitsSarah_Xx

You’re only as cool as your last AIM screen name.

11. away <3 hit the cell 

Nothing was more satisfying than seeing the “new message” screen pop up on your pink Razr.

12. Don’t IM me; so mad right now. 

Translation: Someone IM me right now so I can vent about whatever made me so mad.

13. ily Brandon <3 10/05/2005 

They all said it wouldn’t last… and they were right. You two broke up the next day after an emotional convo at the cafeteria lunch tables.

14. DancingChick478 is idle

Clearly you were way too busy doing really important things to update your away message.

15. Don't tell me the sky's the limit when there are footprints on the moon ✧ ✦ ✹ ✸ ✷ ✶ ✵ ✴ ❂

Because your mom wouldn’t take you to get headshots so you could audition to be on the Disney Channel.

16. 11:11 make a wish <333 

You probably wished that your mom would FINALLY let your upgrade your pink Razr to something much cooler: a Sidekick.

17. Can’t sleep :/ IM me if ur awake <3

Eleven o’clock on a school night in seventh grade is basically the equivalent of 3 a.m. on a school night in college.

As embarrassing as some of these are, we love to reminisce about the good old days of AIM. Don’t lie; you definitely posted at LEAST one of these back in the day. We sure did, and we’re not afraid to admit it! 

How She Got There: Sheila Nazarian & Laura Darrah, Co-Founders of She + Lo

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Name: Sheila Nazarian
Age: 35
Job Title and Description: Co-Creative Director
College/Major: USD/Bachelor of Arts
Website: www.sheandlo.com 
Twitter Handle:
@SheandLo

Name: Laura Darrah
Age: 36
Job Title and Description: Co-Creative Director
College/Major: USD/Business Administration
Website: www.sheandlo.com 
Twitter Handle:
@SheandLo

What does your current job entail? Is there such a thing as a typical day?

Sheila Nazarian: Each day is very different. Much of what I do on a daily basis is creative – designing new pieces, shepherding photo shoots, sourcing materials, talking to bloggers – but Laura and I also both deal with business aspects like overseeing the production and sales teams. One of the things I love most is that it’s so diverse, and there is no typical day.

Laura Darrah: No such thing! Being co-creative directors of She + Lo, we are involved in all creative aspects of our brand on a daily basis. Our days include anything from designing our collections, to producing our campaigns, directing our product shoots, sourcing materials, blogging, working on social media direction, [attending] PR meetings, [attending] PR events and traveling to present the line to customers.

What is the best part of your job?

SN: I love the diversity of each day, and the creativity I can bring to so many aspects [of the work].  I also love the research process: traveling all over the world, looking at the latest fashions on runways and in stores. It’s exciting to look for new ideas, to find inspiration and bring it into our product. However, the challenge of starting up a new company is the most exciting part of everyday.

LD: I love that every day is different from the next, but is always filled with creativity. Designing new product is definitely the best part, but I also love the challenge of pioneering a new brand and the strategic marketing involved. 

What was your first entry-level job in your field and how did you get it?

SN: I worked for Estée Lauder, learning marketing, how to work in a corporate environment [and] how to work your way up the ladder. Then I went to work for my parents’ company and became a buyer. I traveled quite a lot, especially to Paris. I went to a lot of runway shows and really started to develop some confidence in myself and my fashion instincts.

LD: All during college and grad school I worked for a marketing firm that I found through an ad. I loved marketing, but [the experience] assured [me that] I wanted to have my own business. After getting my M.B.A., I decided to travel instead of meeting recruiters like most of my graduating class. It was the best decision, as I found my love for unique accessories and wrote my business plan on the beach in Bali. I spent a good amount of my college savings importing and wholesaling the handbags out of my home to earn capital.

Luckily, I soon met Sheila, who was already working in the fashion industry, and we formed a great partnership. Within six months, we began designing our own collections and launched Treesje in 2005. We sold Treesje in 2011 and launched Joelle Hawkens in 2012. Then we partnered with another company to start She + Lo. It has been such a great journey so far!

What is one thing you wish you knew about your industry when you first started out that you know now?

SN: I wish we had known we needed more money to get off the ground properly. Laura and I each put a thousand dollars into our first handbag line, Treesje, and we grew the business organically, but it took quite a long time. As part of that, I wish we had had a mentor, like a CPA, to hold our hands and teach us how to build a proper structure. We were so young and didn’t know how to think ahead, so a financial mentor would have really helped.

LD: First, how quickly the fashion industry moves! You really have to be two seasons ahead to make sure you are delivering fresh and innovative designs. And second, just how expensive it is to successfully maintain and brand a fashion company.

At the beginning, Sheila and I wore all hats of the business, so it was incredibly hard to catch up each season, especially financially. Looking back, I wish we had spent some more time raising capital for our initial launch. Sheila and I grew the business very organically with the initial capital we made from re-selling our imports. Thus, most of our capital was spent on financing our production orders. With more capital, I think we could have grown the business and brand a lot quicker.

Who is one person who changed your professional life for the better?

SN: My mother. She [became] a fashion designer [when] I was two or three years old. She was a role model for being a working mom. She taught me a love for working, being on your own as a woman, and being able to work and be a mom at the same time. She also taught me that you’ve got to go after what you love. It’s okay if you fail, but you’ve got to try.

LD: My father. I grew up as an entrepreneur’s daughter, so I watched him succeed big and fail big several times! He had such tenacity and determination with all his different companies. He definitely gave me the confidence and encouragement to start my own business. To this day, he is the first person I call when I need help with a business decision.  

What is one mistake you made along the way and what did you learn from it?

SN: As I mentioned, not having a professional accountant or bookkeeper. It was a huge mistake, both financially and emotionally.  We learned that it is best to subcontract out all areas that do not include designing and marketing.

LD: Not listening to advice we received when we first started our company to hire a professional bookkeeper! Much like several young companies, we were struggling with cash flow, so we handled the books ourselves. This ended up being a much more costly mistake years later to clean everything up. In fact, it taught us to outsource all departments that neither of us had experience with.  

What has been the most surreal moment of your career thus far?

SN: I think, for me, it was when we started getting approached to sell Treesje. It took us seven years to build the brand, and I couldn’t believe someone actually wanted to buy it! After that milestone, it was also a little surreal being solicited to launch She + Lo.

LD: I’d have to say that having the opportunity to launch She + Lo has been the most surreal. This is our third brand launch, and it has already been picked up by Bloomingdales, Nordstrom, Henri Bendel and several specialty stores in our first season. Even without a household brand name, it was unbelievable to have such a successful response to our collection.  

What do you look for when considering hiring someone?

SN: Because I feel that details are really important – all the small things that make a business successful – I look for people who are really detail-oriented. I also appreciate people who are creative and self-motivated. We’re not micromanaging bosses. We want someone who can grasp an idea and run with it.

LD: Entrepreneurial spirit.  I look for employees who have the confidence and tenacity to make decisions as if it was their own company. Entrepreneurs also have an unlimited work ethic and don’t “check out” at 5:00 p.m. every day. Our minds are always thinking about how to grow the business and strengthen the brand.

What advice would you give to a 20-something with similar aspirations?

SN: If you have a passion for starting your own company, whether in the fashion world or otherwise, go for it! Start with internships, learn the ropes [and] get your foot in the door. But go after that, dream. Life’s too short to wonder what you could have accomplished.

LD: Go for it! If you are in your twenties, then this is the best time to take risks as you have less responsibility and more time (before kids, mortgage, the works!). The fashion industry in particular is quite daunting, but if you have the right amount of confidence and work ethic, you will achieve your goals. The best experience for me was real experience. Starting small allowed me to make small mistakes and gain confidence to take bigger and bigger risks.

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The 16 Types of Drunk Girls

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Love 'em or hate 'em, we've seen (or even been) all of 'em. Behold the 16 types of drunk girls you will encounter in life. 

1. The Shrieker

After four vodka tonics, her voice gets three octaves higher and everything gets SUPER EXCITING!!! Every song that comes on is “her jam,” and she’s gonna let everyone know. Oh, and also, she hasn’t seen you in “SOOOOOOOO long!!!!”

2. The Over-Emotional One

Everything that comes out of her mouth usually starts with “I just,” “I feel,” “I need” or “I want,” which is followed by something ludicrous that happened five years ago. “I just feel like you hate me ever since I barfed in your purse junior year.” She finds something to cry about every time you go out, her smoky eye makeup streaming down her face like wet paint. 

3. The Dancing Machine

It’s all fun and games until this girl shows up on the dance floor. You're having a great time re-enacting the Napoleon Dynamite dance with your friends, then this girl clears the way and starts doing sexy pirouettes. She drops it so low you start to question if she’ll even make it back up.

4. The "It’s 5 O’Clock Somewhere" Girl

She doesn’t care what time it is, what she’s doing or where she’s at - she is always down to drink. She’s the girl who pre-games the pre-game to the pre-game, bongs every beer and cures her hangovers with mimosas.

5. The Cheater

Apparently her boyfriend doesn’t exist whenever she is within 500 feet of a bar past 11 p.m.

6. The Puker

Every. Single. Time. You start to create a point system for this girl: 10 points if she makes it in the trash can, 20 if she makes it in the toilet. 50 points if she manages to put her hair up by herself first.

7. The Scrappy One

Whatever you do, do not piss this girl off. Just don’t. She will take her earrings out, start talking with her hands and rip your heart and soul out. The only case in which this type of drunk girl is good to have around is when you are the one she is fighting for. If she’s fighting you… run.

8. The Flirt

Everything (and anything) with a pulse flocks to this girl when she’s in the bar. She could be on the verge of a severe blackout and still look adorable. She has perfected the drunk pout and can get you a free drink in three seconds flat by batting her fake eyelashes at the bartender. Be careful of this girl, though; those fake eyelashes might bat so hard that even your boyfriend will be drawn to her.

9. The One Who Doesn’t Give a Sh*t

Don’t ask her to grab drinks when you want to whine about your boyfriend. Sure, she’ll listen, but she doesn’t care. She’s just there for the booze. Although, she is the perfect one to call when you just broke up with your boyfriend and you need to hate the world for a minute. She’ll drink you into stupidity and leave you throwing your middle finger in the air.

10. The Disappearing Act

You look away for one second and she’s gone. Drunk girls are always losing friends, and our poor judgment of time leaves us ready to round up a search team.  “Where is Kelly? She went to the bathroom 10 minutes ago. I think she’s dead.”

11. The Drunk Dialer

All seven of your Saturday morning voicemails are always from this girl. Most of them are of her thinking she is actually having a conversation with you. “You are the best friend ever. Like literally ever. You are so perfect, I just want to make out with your face.” Without these girls, how would we know that we have friends who love us at 2:30 in the morning?

12. The “I’m Not Even That Drunk” One

She’s a really good liar… or so she thinks. This girl is like a one-woman circus, spending half of her night downing shots and the other half doing back handsprings trying to prove that she’s “not even that drunk.” Sometimes it is actually believable for a minute... until she doesn’t land that back handspring well and crashes into the DJ booth.

13. The Blackout or Backout One

Don’t invite this girl out for drinks at Applebee's on a Tuesday night, because it won’t end well. When it comes to drinking, it’s all-or-nothing for this girl; sipping casually on a glass of wine isn’t an option. She’s the one who gets kicked out of the bar, loses her sixth spare key of the week in the sewage grate and resorts to passing out in the quad. And yet, somehow, the girl is miraculously never hungover in the morning. Usually, she’s just still drunk.

14. The Clumsy One

She never listens when you tell her heels aren’t a good idea. Just look for her on Monday; she’ll be the one who shows up to class in a sling and a walking cast.

15. The Super Sexual One

Whiskey, vodka, beer, wine, rum, tequila… it all makes her frisky. She's the one who runs into her biology TA at the bar and climbs on his lap, bragging about how “flexible” she is and that she would love to show him sometime. The worst part is that the poor girl is always mortified the next morning.

16. The One-Drink Wonder

It's like the calm before the storm: she's the adorably innocent girl who sits with her legs crossed tighly at the bar, then throws back one Mike’s Hard and is three sheets to the wind. Part of us wishes we could still get drunk off of one wine cooler, and the other part of us wishes she would stop telling everyone in the bar about Fancy, her miniature poodle with cataracts who is basically her hero.


The 11 Most WTF 'Pretty Little Liars' Moments

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Let's take a moment to appreciate the dedicated fans of Pretty Little Liars; you've been through a lot. We're now in the fifth season, and there have been enough insane plot twists, questionable decision-making and bizarre murders to last us a lifetime - and the show was just renewed for two more seasons! Whether you're a hardcore fan or just trying to keep up with PLL week to week, there's no denying that the girls of Rosewood know how to keep us on our toes. 

In a Herculean feat of discipline (and after much roundtable discussion at the HC headquarters), we were able to narrow down the 11 most WTF moments in the series thus far - no small task, let us assure you. While some of these moments were absolutely terrifying and had us looking like this...

... there were others that were shocking, haunting or just plain upsetting, like when you find out that a character you've loved and trusted for years HAS COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY BETRAYED YOU. That kind of thing. Anyway, let's get into the list and relive the most OMG-worthy WTF moments in Pretty Little Liars history.

WARNING: Spoilers ahead!

1. When "A" (Mona) ran Hanna over with a car

"Keep Your Friends Close" (Season 1, Episode 10)

This was the first moment in the show when we realized what we had gotten ourselves into by becoming emotionally attached to these characters. It's pretty much common knowledge at this point that Mona was behind the wheel, but we still can't believe this actually happened (and also that Hanna didn't die after getting hit head-on by a moving vehicle).

2. When Spencer and Emily found Jason's darkroom full of photos of Aria

"Picture This" (Season 2, Episode 9)

Talk about a stalker! Emily and Spencer finding a collection of creepy photographs of Aria in Jason's shed-turned-darkroom was made even more unsettling by the bloodred lighting and the fact that the photographs were of Aria sleeping. We'll never look at a toolshed the same way again.

3. When Hanna, Spencer and Emily stumbled upon the creepy-as-hell Alison look-alike doll

"If These Dolls Could Talk" (Season 2, Episode 24)

Everyone knows that dolls are creepy, but this episode of PLL took it to a whole new level. Not only did the girls break into a doll shop (casual), but they followed the chanting of, "Follow me, end up like me" and discovered this doll, unmistakably meant to represent Alison and her gruesome death.

4. When Mona was chanting and brushing a doll's hair in the children's ward of an insane asylum

"Crazy" (Season 3, Episode 7)

Speaking of dolls, this scene of Mona sitting on a bed in the children's ward of an insane asylum, brushing the hair of a porcelain doll and chanting what seems to be gibberish is straight out of a horror movie - we weren't saying "WTF" as much as we were saying, "Can we look now?" Although Mona's creepy song actually turned out to be a helpful clue, this scene still goes down as one of the most terrifying in the show's history.

5. When Aria was locked in a train car with Garrett's corpse

"This Is a Dark Ride" (Season 3, Episode 13)

The entire Halloween episode in season three was a little over the top, especially since all of the action was confined to a train, but that's kind of Pretty Little Liars' thing. As if the close-up shot of Aria trapped in a coffin in a train car with duct tape over her mouth wasn't panic-inducing enough, the camera then panned to Garrett's corpse, with whom Aria was sharing the coffin. Talk about spooky!

6. When Tippi the parrot gave the girls a clue via a very important telephone number

"Turn of the Shoe" (Season 4, Episode 2)

In general, birds freak us out: they have these enormous eyes that never blink and their movements are kind of robotic. Leave it to PLL to completely justify our fears in this episode, in which Tippi the parrot starts singing and mimicking a song that turns out to be a mysterious but crucial telephone number. When your protagonists start getting clues from birds, you know things are getting cray.

7. Ezra is A?!

"Now You See Me, Now You Don't" (Season 4, Episode 12)

Many would argue (including members of HC) that this was the single most WTF moment of the series: When Ezra was revealed to be A. Well, at least that's what it looked like when we got a shot of Ezra surveying his creepy lair of photographs, timelines, extensive files and video footage of the Liars that he's been collecting over the years. We know the truth now, but we still get chills at the thought of this scene.

8. When the Liars found out that Alison had been alive the whole time

"Grave New World" (Season 4, Episode 13)

We had our suspicions about this, especially when Spencer had her "hallucination" that she was talking to her presumably dead friend, but we were shocked nonetheless when Alison decided to formally return to the land of the living. (Perhaps even more shocking: How perfect her hair looked when she was on the run. Who has time for curling irons when you're pretending to be dead?) While we loved seeing the Queen Bee strut her stuff in flashbacks, we love her even more now that she's interacting with the Liars in the present day. 

9. When Spencer was running through the woods in a bridal gown and her train got caught in a bear trap

"Unbridled" (Season 4, Episode 23)

This whole episode was so outrageous, it almost didn't seem real. From the finger bones in Spencer's corset to her running through the woods in a wedding gown, things looked headed for Crazyville... and then Spencer's train got caught in a bear trap, and we had arrived. The entire scene was bizarre for so many reasons, but the addition of metal trapping tools took it over the edge.

10. When Aria became a murderer by killing Shana

"EscApe From New York" (Season 5, Episode 1) 

Now, we just want to say that having a character on this show become a murderer is not in and of itself anything to say "WTF" about. When it's one of the four Liars, however, that's a different story, and there were plenty of jaws on the floor when sweet little Aria Montgomery killed Shana by knocking her over the head with a gun. We'll be honest: We kind of loved seeing one of the Liars get her hands a little dirty, and we never liked Shana that much, anyway.

11. When Mrs. DiLaurentis's body was unearthed in Spencer's backyard

"Whirly Girlie" (Season 5, Episode 2)

With all the talk of burying and being buried on Pretty Little Liars, we suppose it did make sense that Ali's dog found Mrs. DiLaurentis's body buried in the Hastings' backyard. That being said, it was still a totally WTF moment. Seeing the lifeless hand sticking out of the dirt definitely gave us chills and reminded us how much we love this show for being so ridiculously over the top.

In conclusion...

Don't change, PLL; don't ever change.

Newest 'Mockingjay' Teaser Promises Lots of Action

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Another Mockingjay Part 1 teaser trailer has been released, and we swear they are just getting better and better! While the other teaser was nothing short of chilling (and short in general), this one finally gives us a glimpse of the action we can expect to see in the third film. Let us just say it makes us want to go out, buy our own bow and arrow and join the fight against the Capitol ourselves.

The trailer opens with Plutarch Heavensbee (played by the late Philip Seymour Hoffman) confidently telling President Coin (Julianne Moore) that "No one else can do this but her," referring to Katniss Everdeen, who has grown from the "girl on fire" to the face of a dangerous (yet worthy) revolution. The trailer reveals retaliation from the districts, resistance from the Capitol, a mockingjay-shaped crop circle at 0:36 and Katniss stepping up as the bad-a** leader she was born to be. And, as always, President Snow is just as horrible (and let's be honest: downright creepy) as we expect him to be. We love to hate him.

While the trailer is very brief, there is so much excitement packed into the minute-long video that it leaves us wanting more! MockingjayPart 1 is already shaping up to be what looks like a stellar and action-packed movie that will have us at the edge of our seats. And is it just us, or have we kind of started to mix up the difference between Jennifer Lawrence and her character, Katniss (because they're both just way too cool for their own good)?

Can it just be November 21 already? At the risk of being too cheesy, we are officially hungry for the Hunger Games. Like, now!

What do you think of the teaser, collegiettes? Which part of the movie are you most excited for? Tell us in the comments!

 

Win a $1000 Scholarship by Designing Condom Packaging

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When you think of scoring scholarships, you generally think about raking in stellar grades, performing your best during the big game or writing an essay on what courage means to you. Rarely do you associate it with, well, condoms!

With Say It With a Condom's new competition, you could spread an important message about consensual sex and win a $1000 scholarship if you design a condom that demonstrates a fresh way to talk about consent. The company, which makes custom condom packaging, wants to make the conversation about consent last longer, and they need your help to do it! The winner will score 50 free prints of his or her own design, and 25 percent of the profits from sales will go to the group Force: Upsetting Rape Culture.

Competitors are to design custom condom packaging with a square template and submit it to the company (just send an email with the subject line "How I Say Consent" to the email address consent@sayitwithacondom.com along with your full name, school, and class year--you also have to "like" the company on Facebook!). Next, the top 10 designs are displayed on the company's Facebook page, and the "liking war" begins. The design with the most "likes" on August 15th wins the scholarship!

Even if you don't have an innovative idea in mind for your own condom packaging, be sure to check out Say It With a Condom's Facebook page to "like" your favorite designs. There are only three days left to submit your design, collegiettes, so get cracking! The finalists will be announced on August 1. Look here for some inspiration and go get started!

Are You Ready for a Relationship? 5 Things to Consider

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Relationships can be messy, especially in the beginning. After all, committing to take care of another person can be difficult if you jump into a relationship too quickly or without taking a second to reflect on what you want from your campus cutie.

So what should you think about before change your Facebook status to “In a relationship”? Here are five things to consider:

1. Get involved for the right reasons.

One of the simplest questions to ask yourself is why you want a relationship in the first place. Is it because you really like this person, or are you trying to distract yourself from other problems?

Dr. Jane Greer, a New York-based relationship expert and author of What About Me? Stop Selfishness from Ruining Your Relationship, acknowledges that there are definitely some not-so-awesome reasons for entering a relationship. “Some wrong reasons for getting into a relationship are agreeing to go out just because he's more invested in it than you are and is making you feel guilty, starting a new relationship only because all of your friends are dating someone and being with someone just to feel secure with a partner rather than for the feelings you have for that particular guy,” she says.

Jackie*, a senior at Wesleyan University, didn’t think about her reasons for getting involved with her then-boyfriend, Conner*. “I had just gotten out of a pretty serious relationship that lasted over three years, and I met Conner about a month later and immediately decided to date him because I missed the companionship,” she says. “It ended up being the quintessential messy rebound relationship. We didn’t mesh well at all, I subconsciously compared him to my ex-boyfriend and, looking back, I feel like I just wasn’t fair to him.”

Overall, Jackie wishes she’d given more thought beforehand to why she wanted a relationship in the first place. “If I’d just stopped to think about it, I would’ve realized that I was doing it because I was hurt, not because I was invested in any type of future with Conner,” she says.

So how can you make sure that you’re not jumping into things too quickly? Dr. Greer suggests you go out with a couple of people to ensure that this relationship is the one you want. “Before college women invest all their time and energy into a single relationship, they should give themselves the opportunity to date multiple guys and be open to different types of people before settling down,” she says. Have a little fun hanging out with many different people!

2. Know how long you can see yourself with this person.

We’re not saying you have to be ready to marry this guy, but are you looking for just a semester fling, or do you want something serious and long-term?

Jen*, a junior at the University of Colorado Boulder, knows how awkward it can be if you don’t answer this question before you really begin your relationship. “I started dating a guy named Lucas* in early June last summer and never really thought about where I wanted to take it, instead assuming it’d just be a summer fling,” she says. “Not knowing what I wanted led to a lot of arguments and fights about defining the relationship, which in turn spoiled a lot of the fun we could’ve had as a couple.”

Obviously, how long you see yourself being with a person determines how much time and energy you’re going to want to put into the relationship, so it’s important to figure out!

3. Make sure you know what your potential significant other wants, too.

As essential as it is to know where you stand, it’s just as crucial to make sure you’ve been talking with your beau and know what he’s looking for, too. A breakdown of communication early on in a relationship is dangerous, so chat with your guy about the state of your relationship often.

Building on her experience, Jen wishes she had asked Lucas what he wanted a lot sooner. “Since I was vaguely interested in a summer fling, you can imagine how sticky the situation got when Lucas started talking about us visiting each other at school in the fall and spending Thanksgiving and Christmas together,” she says. “I really wish I’d said something about my intentions sooner.”

Jen emphasizes the importance of knowing where the other person stands when making your own decision about a relationship. “Had I been smart enough to ask Lucas sooner, I would’ve seen that he wanted something super serious and I didn’t,” she says. “In retrospect, I probably wouldn’t have starting dating him if I knew that.”

4. Know if you have enough time for a relationship.                                                                                                    

To state the obvious, relationships take a lot of time and energy, so if you don’t think you can give a serious time commitment to your campus cutie, you may want to reconsider whether or not you date him or her.

After all, dating isn’t just about going on actual dates (which do take up quite a bit of time as is). There’s all of the texting and calling you’ll be doing, the events you’ll be going to together, and just the general amount of time it takes to get to know another human being.

Dr. Greer reminds collegiettes of the importance of staying centered when in a relationship. “It's important to balance it out with spending time with friends and participating in campus activities,” she says. “College girls need to be open to possibilities and opportunities before making a decision on a relationship, and, once they're in one, they need to devote an equal amount of time to the boyfriend, their friends, their hobbies and schoolwork.”

Not sure how to see if you have enough time? Rachel, a junior at Florida State University, recommends talking to your beau before things get serious. “One thing I wish I’d done in a couple of my previous relationships was talk to my guy about how much we wanted to communicate and hang out on a daily and weekly basis,” she says. “It can be so exhausting spending all of your free time texting someone or turning down other things to hang out with your boyfriend if that’s not what you want.”

Rachel emphasizes that boundaries are extremely important. “You need to figure out how much communication you need from the other person,” she says. “Do you need to be in contact 24/7, or will just a quick ‘good morning’ text do on most days? Relationships aren’t always about the big romantic gestures; they’re about the little things, too.”

5. Know what sacrifices you’re willing to make.

Building on whether or not you have enough time for a relationship, how much time for other things are you willing to give up for your significant other? After all, just because you have the time doesn’t mean you want to be using it. Are you okay with spending 30 minutes every night talking to him on Skype if it’s long distance or having a date night with him every weekend? After all, Skyping takes away time from homework (or binge watching Netflix), and date nights mean less time with friends. How are you going to fit in everything?

Jackie had this issue with Conner. “Since I’d just gotten out of a really long-term relationship, I wanted something light and fun, but Conner wanted something way more serious,” she says. “He wanted us to text all the time and hang out several times a week, but I wasn’t willing to give up all of my extracurriculars and friend time to do things with him that much. It created a rift in our relationship pretty quickly.”

Rachel also notes that sacrifices can range from small to pretty serious. “I’ve dated long distance before, and that’s a huge sacrifice both time-wise and financially,” she says. “In contrast, I also once sacrificed eating meat so I could date a guy who was a staunch vegetarian! Honestly, sacrifices vary a lot, but you just have to make sure that you know what they are and whether or not you’re ready and able to make them.”

Not eating meat for a guy? We’re not sure we could do that!

Overall, getting into a new relationship can be scary, exciting and difficult all at the same time. By taking a step back and asking yourself some crucial questions, you can avoid some heartbreak and have a much healthier relationship from the start!

*Names have been changed.

5 Ways to Make Friends After Freshman Year

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Freshman year has come and gone, and for many, it's a whirlwind. As a newcomer to your campus, you met a lot of people quickly and probably made many fast friends. Whether you're content with your current acquaintances or you’re feeling as though you haven’t quite found your niche, now that you're adjusted to your college lifestyle, you're probably feeling ready to make a variety of new friends  and expand your social circle. This five-step guide shows you the most effective ways to make friends after freshman year using the social, professional, and academic opportunities you get in college.

1. Go to Parties in Smaller Groups

As fun as it can be to kick it with a huge, wild crew, it’s probably not the most effective means to making lasting friendships. Instead, invite one or two girls from your dorm to join you at a party one weekend. "I was less intimidated by the social scene come sophomore year, and felt comfortable going out in smaller groups," says Allie Chase from Michigan State. “Its easier to look out for each other, and much less overwhelming, because when you aren’t struggling to remember names right off the bat, you take the time to get to know people more personally.”

Not only does keeping your going-out group small help you get to know who you’re partying with better, but it also makes it easier for you to meet even more new people at the party. “Everyone's loose and ready to have a good time, joke around, and connect, but only with approachable-looking people,” says Erin Fett, a recent grad of Colgate. Think about which group you’d feel most comfortable approaching: would it be a smaller circle, or a pack with too many people to count? The first one? We agree!

2. Join a Club Based on Your Career Path

Focusing on your GPA freshman year was a smart move, and now that you’ve set yourself up for success, Sharon L. Jones, the former Associate Director of Career Services at UNC-Chapel Hill, explains that “sophomore year is a good time to venture out and meet people with similar interests, explore careers, and build skills.”

Jones was also a former adviser to the student chapter of Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM) at UNC-Chapel Hill, and she suggests that you look for clubs based on your current career goals, such as student chapters of professional associations, academic honorary societies in particular fields of study, and professional fraternities and sororities.These types of opportunities will not only prepare you for life after college, but will also introduce you to people with similar professional aspirations. Exeter University collegiette Lauren Hudson gained a great group of friends through her involvement with Her Campus Exeter as President and Editor-in-Chief. “Running the whole team has brought me closer to so many girls that I never would have met before,” she says. “These are girls in different year groups and girls who study completely different courses - it's been such a benefit of an already amazing position that I've been able to make so many great friends!”

3. Volunteer Your Time

Those of us who made our first pals selling Thin Mints and Samoas know that community service can be a great opportunity to make friends. Though nowadays, the old Girl Scout getup might only come out once a year (hello, Halloween!), there are endless opportunities to be an asset to your campus community year-round. Whether you choose to build affordable homes, pay visits to hospital patients, or groom puppies at an animal shelter, the key to meeting other students with similar skills and interests is to pick volunteer work that interests you.

Christina Hoover, an architecture student at Syracuse University, made some of her best friends when she joined the Freedom by Design team within the American Institute of Architecture Students. Freedom by Design is an organization that uses simple construction solutions to make living easier for those who are confined to their homes. Devoting this amount of time and effort to a cause they care about has allowed the members of FBD to “become more than just a team,” she says. “We’ve become close friends ready to work hard together, take breaks together, and laugh together. Its a one-of-a-kind experience.” Not to mention, volunteering looks impressive on a resume!

4. Take on a Leadership Role in Your Club

Many people take freshman year to explore their interests, and we all know an easy way to do that is through the clubs offered on campus. Whether you’ve been involved in several activities or have been totally devoted to one, you now know the ropes, and can help others get on your level by taking on a leadership position.

Erica Choo, president of the Wellesley Class of 2014 Council, says she ran for her position because she wanted to become more involved on campus. “Since becoming president my junior year, I have met so many incredible people that I probably would not have had the chance to interact with otherwise,” she says.

Through her role of bringing the class closer together with social events and fundraisers, she has organized events that helped others make friends and allowed her to do the same along the way. “On council, I met a girl who I had seen around campus before but never really talked to a whole lot,” she says. “We organized a study break tailgate together outside of the dorms for everyone in our class, popped the trunks of our cars, and blasted the radio so loud that I’m sure you could hear the music all the way from the other end of campus. It was a really great way to meet new people and bond with other girls in our class, and through working together on class council, she has truly become one of my best friends at school.”

5. Study Socially

While Erica’s wild study break tailgate has us easily convinced that taking a breather from the books can be a fantastic way to make friends, we can only wish it was possible to take a study breaks without the aforementioned studying. When its time to buckle down, organizing a study group is a great way to stay on top of your work with a built-in excuse to hang out with the people you’re working with. Invite people in your classes to whom you haven’t talked much to meet up and prep for a midterm together. And since we can’t always rely on revved engines and blasting beats to stay social on study breaks, recent Boston University graduate Mary Danielewski shares a tip for breaking the ice with study partners: “I like to let classmates I don’t know as well choose dinner spots and coffee shops,” she says. “It puts them in their comfort zone, and introduced me to some great new hangouts!”

 

As you prepare for another year of fun and friend-making, the most important thing is to keep an open mind. Remember that sometimes the best things, including friends, can be found when you aren’t even looking!

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