In college, your dorm room is your haven from the outside world. What little privacy you have in college is confined within those four walls that contain your bedroom, kitchen and living room all in one compact space. And most of the time, only half of this already small space is yours.

Unfortunately, your room often serves as your study space as well, and when the library’s hours don’t sympathize with your impending all-nighter, your cozy bedroom must suddenly become study central. If you’re easily drawn away from your studies by your inviting bed and the newest episode of Grey’s Anatomy, read on for five tips on how to avoid temptation and ace your next test from the comfort of your dorm room.

1. Study at Your Desk

If your organic chemistry notes weren’t already putting you to sleep, getting into your bed definitely will. As enticing as your down comforter and fluffy pillows may look after a long day in class, don’t fall to temptation! Nothing is worse than getting in bed with three chapters to read for class and waking up eight hours later with the unopened book in your lap.

Art Markman, a psychology professor at the University of Texas at Austin, says that “the body’s habit when lying down is to relax and sleep,” so as you lay in bed flipping through your notes, your body actually takes a less active role in your studying. To fight your body’s natural desire to sleep, sit at your desk and mimic the feeling of sitting in class.

“I always find that if I’m studying in my dorm room I have to stay away from my bed; it’s too comfy and it puts me to sleep!” says Nadia, a senior at Rutgers University. As an alternative, Nadia suggests sitting at your desk and using a lot of light to keep you awake and focused on your studies. To make sure you accomplish everything on your to-do list, reserve your bed for sleeping and stick to your desk chair. Getting in bed when you’re done will be the perfect reward!

2. Keep Your Study Space Neat

If you’re looking to buckle down and memorize five chapters for your next test, organize your space and get rid of the makeup and snacks that seem to always be covering it. Limit your distractions by keeping your desk solely for studying! When you have such a small space to work in, organizing it can make you more focused, so gear your work space toward the type of homework you’re doing and check out some of HC’s favorite school supplies for a little desk inspiration.

3. Control Your Environment

When your entire hall seems to have no homework to do, silence can seem like a thing of the past. With noise-canceling headphones or quality earplugs, you can make the ruckus of college life fade away. Spotify, with the help of clinical psychologist Dr. Emma Gray, conducted a study that reveals the benefits of engaging your brain with music to complement your learning.

The music you choose and the beats per minute of that music should be based on the information you’re learning. For example, classical music with 60-70 beats per minute stimulates learning and enhances concentration for mathematicians, whereas pop music with 50-80 beats per minute allows the left side of your brain to take control, which is helpful for people studying the sciences, humanities and languages.

Try out noise-canceling headphones like the popular Beats by Dr. Dre headphones or this less expensive pair from Panasonic to silence dorm life.

If studying to music isn’t for you, try out some nice earplugs available at drugstores like CVS, Walgreens and Target to seclude yourself and hit the books. Most dorms have RA-enforced “quiet hours,” and your roommate would most likely be willing to hang out in another room if you’re looking for complete silence. Noise can be the biggest distraction from your studies, so try to get some quiet time while you review!

4. Limit Your Internet Usage

As college students, most of us fear missing a crucial tweet, Instagram or status update. In the hopes of staying constantly up to date, we leave tabs open for Facebook and Twitter for those “five-minute study breaks” that stretch into an hour.

Free Internet applications like SelfControl for Macs and Cold Turkey for PCs allow you to manually limit your access to various websites. You can set a list of sites you don’t want to access and both applications will block the addresses on your list for whatever time you choose. The beauty of social media is that all of those posts will still be there when you’re done, so you’re not really saying “goodbye,” but rather, “see you soon” to your digital friendships. A Facebook hiatus will keep you from complaining about your homework so that you have time to actually do it!

If you’ve downloaded every social media app on your phone like we have, try turning your phone off, or, if you have an iPhone, putting it on “do not disturb.” This setting on the iPhone silences calls, alerts and notifications so that you won’t be tempted to check your most recent texts. Your friends can also help keep you on track by safeguarding your phone or changing your social media passwords for you so you won’t even be able to log back on until they let you! They’ll be more than happy to save you from the temptation around you.

5. Take Breaks

Research shows that taking scheduled breaks from your studies can make your brain more alert and productive. If you ever feel like you’ve been staring at a computer screen or book for too long, it’s probably because you have been! University of Illinois psychology professor Dr. Alejandro Lleras states that“constant stimulation is registered by our brains as unimportant, to the point that the brain erases it from our awareness.”

The Pomodoro Technique suggests taking breaks every 25 minutes to maximize your productivity during any given task. Breaking the material into chunks will make your homework feel much more manageable, and while taking a break may feel like a waste of time, the material will feel much fresher than before when you come back to it. Make your breaks productive by making yourself a cup of coffee or exercising. Both will wake your body up, making your next chunk of studying much more productive. You’ll be surprised how much more efficient you can be just by taking a few breaks!

These five easy tips will put your dorm room’s versatility to good use and save you from mind-numbing hours spent in the library. Maybe your own room will turn out to be the perfect study spot you’ve been searching for all year!

A sorority sounded like a great idea when you were a freshman—you were promised a group of girls who would clue you into campus and love and support you like a sister, hooking you up with great information about where to go, where to find great dates, how to participate in awesome campus traditions, and providing you with tons of other benefits. By sophomore, junior, or senior year, however, sorority life can start seeming a little less great. If you’re no longer feeling the “Alpha Phi love” or “Phi Beta warm-fuzzies,” check out some of the pros and cons of disaffiliating from or leaving your sorority.

Pro: You’ll have more flexibility.

Think about a typical week’s worth of sorority activities. Now think about what your schedule would look like without weekly chapter meetings, charity events, dinner hours, study sessions, and weekend events. Disaffiliating from your sorority could lead to more free time to spend on new things, such as participating in other clubs and activities, volunteering on your own, spending more time hitting the books, hitting the gym, or simply allowing you to have a little more “me time.” Now that you’ve been in school for a while, you also no longer need the plus of having tons of girls around to show you the ins and outs of campus and nightlife in your college town. In fact, you might even have more fun exploring different things in and around campus on your own instead of with a huge group of sisters.

Having more free time could be a huge pro, especially if you’re looking to bring your grades up, devote more time to another organization, nab a killer internship to boost your resume, or develop other skills and talents outside of your sorority commitments.

Think carefully about how you’d use the extra time you’d have before you decide to drop your letters. Do you need more time to tackle a tricky class? Is there an activity you wish you had more time to devote to or would like to join? Are there things you feel like you’re missing out on because you’re busy with all of your sisters?  Reflect on questions like these before making a final decision to make sure you wouldn’t regret leaving.

Con: It might not be as easy to meet people, including alumnae who could open doors to possible careers or internships.

We get it—you’re human. You’re not going to enjoy every event your sisters plan, every fundraiser you throw, or every party you’re expected to attend. These events sometimes carry a huge bonus, though; they can introduce you to people with whom you share similar interests, who support the same cause the fundraiser event is supporting, or who have connections that can take you places. (Beauty parlor scene in Legally Blonde 2, anyone?)  There may be alumnae who work for a company that you’re dying to intern at or work for. “A lot of girls really don’t see the value in a lifetime membership,” says Julie Johnson, College Panhellenics Committee Chairman for the National Panhellenic Conference. She says the experience of being in a sorority extends long after you graduate your school or university. “It really is more than those four years in college,” she says. Johnson advises those thinking about leaving to “think long-term about what could happen.”

Your sorority can also introduce you to some influential people on campus who are in your sorority or in sororities you work with or (single!) hotties in a frat you’re partnered with. Obviously a sorority isn’t the only place where you can make these kinds of connections, but it’s an easy in, and it works as an instant conversation topic. Think about if you can still benefit from the network your sorority provides before you decide whether or not to leave.

Pro: You’ll probably see more of your non-Greek friends.

One huge bonus of no longer going Greek? You’ll now have time for your non-Greek friends. “Once I quit the sorority, I found friends that had interests much more similar to my own, so I do not feel like I missed out on much by quitting the sorority. I could simply go to a bar if I wanted to be in the party scene and I no longer had to pay thousands of dollars to be part of a sorority,” says Leslie*, a recent college grad who left her sorority after a year. This can be great if you’re in a sorority with a lot of mandatory weekend events or mixers, or if you’re in a chapter that celebrates big events like homecoming or spring break together. No longer needing to spend these days with your sisters means more time for friends you’ve met outside the Greek system.

You could also have more flexibility with who you date. Some Greek collegiettes say they feel pressured by their sisters to date guys from certain frats and avoid others in less desirable groups or ones outside the Greek system. Of course, this isn’t the case in every sorority, but it might be easier to meet someone special when you’re not spending every weekend with guys from a specific frat that your sorority has paired up with for a mixer or date party. This is also a major plus if you find you’re no longer as tight with your sisters as you used to be, or you don’t have many friends in the house and didn’t bond with the group like you thought you would.

Con: Seeing your former sisters could be kinda (or really!) awkward.

Unfortunately, not everyone will understand your decision. You could lose touch with some of your sisters you simply weren’t all that close to in the first place, or from others who don’t or won’t see things from your point of view. “Girls would pass me on campus after I quit and wouldn't even acknowledge me,” says Leslie. Be prepared to deal with this, and confide in a few sisters you’re close with if you’re comfortable talking about some of your doubts or issues and trust them. Tell them what you’re thinking and ask for their input. Including the sisters you want to still see and talk to on a regular basis and cluing them in from the start will help you stay close with them, and it will help avoid any awkwardness or drama with the people who matter most to you if you do decide to leave.

Pro: No more dues!

It’s no secret that sorority living can be expensive. Between dues, potential fees for living in the house or eating meals with your sisters, going on trips or weekend getaways, gifts for your little, and all of the oh-so-cute apparel with your letters, it can cost quite a bit to be in a sorority from semester to semester.

Look at your budget and decide whether or not you want to keep spending as much as you have in past semesters to be a part of a group you’re losing interest in. Is it worth the investment? Or are there other things you’d rather spend it on? An investment in a different group on campus, more shopping money, or rent for an awesome off-campus apartment in a future semester could make more financial sense.

However, don’t let budget constraints be the only reason for leaving until you’ve explored your options. Johnson suggests talking to sorority leadership to see if an arrangement can be made if you’re having trouble paying dues or other fees instead of letting it be an obstacle to your participation in sorority activities. “Some groups have policies with reduced membership rates,” she points out as an example of what can come of talking things over with a trusted sister or your house mom. “You also don’t have to buy every t-shirt, buy every picture… it’s all choices that you make,” she says.

Con: You’ll lose out on some of the already-paid-for activities you used to do with your sisters.

Of course, those dues need to get paid for a reason. Chances are some of the money you spend goes back to you in the form of awesome activities or fun events for you and your sisters to bond even more. These activities are also usually discounted (or even free!), meaning you don’t need to shell out as much for some of your favorite ways to spend the weekend.

Again, you’ll have to examine your budget and figure out what activities you enjoy doing with your sisters, and which ones you’d rather drop altogether or do on your own. Look at what you spend and decide if it’s worth it—could you do these things on your own, or is the bonus of having people to do things with on the sorority’s dime worth it?

Pro: You lose some of the pressure to fit in and “fake” enjoyment at events.

Leaving makes sense for a lot of girls who may feel like they no longer fit in with the group. This was the case for Leslie. “Once I joined the sorority, I realized how different I was than most of the girls,” she says. “I knew pretty much immediately that I wanted to quit, but I decided to stick it out for a full year just to make sure I was making the right decision. It seemed that the sorority required more from me than I got in return, and I felt I did not need it to have a good social life.”

Now that you’ve most likely had a year or two under your belt, you’ve probably got a better sense of some fun places to go where other students like to hang out, and you might even have a fave spot or two of your own. Dropping out of your sorority would mean more time to enjoy the things you want to do and go to the places you enjoy the most instead of slapping a smile on your face and sticking to the group decision.

Con: The process of leaving your sorority could be a lot of work you don’t have the time or patience for.   

Most importantly, be persistent! If you do decide to leave, be prepared for a lengthy process that could take a bit of time. “Leaving is very specific to each organization,” says Johnson. Work with sorority leadership, your house mom, or your school’s Greek Council to find out exactly how to disaffiliate.  Also, make sure to consider any other details you need to figure out, such as finding housing, getting on a meal plan, getting a new parking permit, or other things you may need once you leave the house. Know that the process of leaving is also usually not reversible—once you leave, you’re out. Be patient and respectful with anyone and everyone you work with in the process of leaving your sorority to ensure a smooth transition and to minimize any damage to your reputation or image.

Leaving a sorority is a huge personal decision. Only you really know what the right path is for you. Whatever your reasoning for considering leaving, weigh the pros and cons, and don’t be afraid to trust your gut and stick with what feels right. You only get one undergrad college career—make sure you’re spending it the way you want to spend it! 

If you recently graduated or you’re still working towards a degree, connecting with your school’s alumni network can be very beneficial to you. Your school’s alumni resources can help keep you in touch with fellow alumni and your alma mater while providing great networking opportunities for the future.  This can make it easier for you to make connections in your particular field, some which may even lead to a job!

It’s important to get a head start on connecting with your alumni network because you’ll stand out from the crowd and increase the potential of connecting with someone who can help you in the long run.  Whether you’re applying for a job or just looking for alumni events to attend, follow this step-by-step guide and you’ll be able to use the power of the alumni network to your advantage in no time!

Make an Account Online

Making an account on your school’s alumni networking website is the by far the easiest way to receive updates about everything that’s happening in your alumni network.  With a few clicks of your mouse, you’ll be able to create a profile and interact with your classmates and other graduates instantaneously.  Amy Layman, the executive director of alumni relations at Villanova University, says that an alumni website is one of the best ways for collegiettes to stay in touch with their alma maters.

“A website allows us more space for detailed information and serves as the home base for news,” Layman says.

By creating an account online, you’ll be able to stay connected with the alumni office that oversees all alumni activity.  Most online accounts allow graduates to sign up for email alerts, RSVP for events and access career resources that will help you in your job search.  Some even have special offers or discounts, and who doesn’t love that?  Each university varies, so contact your school’s office of alumni relations or visit the office in person to see how you can make the best of their online resources.

Follow Alumni Accounts on Social Media

Following alumni accounts on Twitter, LinkedIn and Facebook can keep you updated on everything from upcoming networking events to the score of the big rivalry basketball game.

Twitter is used to give grads information about events, spread campus news and share updates about alumni on a day-to-day basis.  Facebook is used for the same purpose, but also allows the university to upload pictures from events and lets alumni interact on the Facebook wall.

“We can update alumni on events, breaking news and interesting opportunities more quickly via these platforms than email or other forms of communication,” Layman says. “Following the alumni association on social media provides alumni and students easy access to this info, such as event changes based on weather or last-minute ticket sales for basketball games.”

LinkedInis the best way to connect with fellow graduates when networking or searching for a job.  LinkedIn groups for alumni offer discussion boards, job listings and searches to help find people you went to school with.  These features can help you connect and interact with different members whose experiences may help you in the long run. 

Many universities have subgroups for particular majors that can connect you directly to people in your field.  Villanova has a very active Alumni and Student Mentoring subgroup, so explore LinkedIn and see if there are any groups within the alumni group you wouldn’t want to miss out on.

Join the Alumni Directory

Your school’s alumni directory is basically the White Pages of your school’s alumni network.  It is a compilation of all of the school’s graduates’ profiles and their contact information online so it’s easily accessible and searchable. You can look up your old classmates, access discussion boards and send emails to other alumni as a way of networking.

“While LinkedIn is a great way to interact and make connections, some alumni will never use social media,” Layman says. An alumni directory provides access to many of these individuals who otherwise would not be reachable on social media.

An important part of interacting with the alumni directory is constantly updating your own information so other alumni can look you up, too.  Most schools offer alumni their own email address, but you should at least include your name, location and field of interest.  You never know who might come across your profile when looking to hire a recent grad, so the more detailed it is, the better!

Attend Alumni Events

Alumni events are a great place to interact and socialize with fellow graduates of your alma mater.  These events can range from professional networking cocktail hours to pregame barbeques. 

“From a career perspective, any event is a networking event,” Layman says. “Different activities will attract different alumni, from community service events to athletics events to official networking meetings to social meet-ups and more. Alumni from all walks of life—and in various career stages—attend university-sponsored events.”

Whether you want to reconnect with friends or get your name out into the professional world, attending these events can really help you in the long run.  LinkedIn and online networking may be able to help you to an extent, but you never know what you’ll be able to take away from some one-on-one personal interaction!

“A student or young alumna may glean advice from someone just starting in her career or may meet someone in a hiring position or even a CEO,” Layman says. “When people gather around a common interest and share a common experience—in this case, their alma maters—professional connections occur between people who may have otherwise never met.”

Reach out to Alumni

The best way to use the alumni network to your advantage is to personally connect with the alumni themselves.  If you reach out in a professional manner, you’ll be able to network with alumni who have the experience and connections to potentially help you with your job search. 

“From online resources to in-person connections at events, there so many ways for graduates to connect with each other, with university officials and with their alma maters,” Layman says.

Layman’s biggest advice? “Don't be shy,” she says.  “When I meet individually with young people, especially students, they are often hesitant to reach out to older graduates. I often hear, ‘I don't want to bother them’ or ‘I sent them an email but haven't heard anything.’ Two words: follow up. Alumni are crazy busy—[they have] work, families, community life and more. They are inundated with email and other pulls on their time. But I hear time and time from alumni that they want to help our students.”

By reaching out personally, you’ll stand out from the rest of the students or recent grads.  One email to a graduate of your school might land you an interview, or, better yet, a job!

There are so many different ways you can get involved with your school’s alumni network.  By connecting with graduates, you’ll have an advantage in your career or job search.  Don’t be too shy to reach out to alumni for connections.  You both went to the same school, so there’s bound to be some school spirit you both have that may just help you out!

With Valentine’s Day less than a month away, the question of “what do I wear” comes to mind. Well, Lollipuff has got that figured out for you! The designer good auction site is giving away a FREE Herve Leger dress that you’ll receive just in time for Valentine’s Day! (How sweet is that?) So how do you win this giveaway? It's super easy! All you have to do is share your referral link. For each person who clicks on it, you'll get 10 raffles. For each person who signs up for a new Lollipuff account with a confirmed email address, you'll get 100 more.

You must sign up for a Lollipuff account to participate in this contest.

Here are some ways to get points:

1. Tweet! Tweet out your referral link with any message you like and get 50 raffles. You can tweet up to once per day, so be sure to go back to the site tomorrow for more chances to win!

2. Share on Facebook. Share your referral link with any message you like and get another 50 raffles. You can share on Facebook up to once a day so come back daily!

3. Email friends. For every email sent (using their form), you get 10 raffles. For every resulting sign up with confirmed email address you get 100 raffles!

4. Blog about it. Get 500 raffles! If you participate in this, please leave a link to the blog post in the comments. (They'll check out your blog too!)

At the end of January, Lollipuff will randomly select a winner to get a Herve Leger dress in their size just in time for Valentine’s Day! The more points you have, the better your chances of winning so go sign-up and start sharing!

Women who made history in the Winter Olympics. [Cosmopolitan]

The weirdest job interview questions. [Fast Company]

What if ‘Clueless’ took place in 2014? [The Huffington Post]

Struggles every college student can relate to. [BuzzFeed]

The strangest looking airplane. [CNN]

Honest titles of the 2014 Oscar nominated movies. [CollegeHumor]

The science of selfies. [BBC News]

Lena Dunham’s unretouched Vogue photos. [Jezebel]

Before our lives became engulfed by social media. [Thought Catalog]

Polaroids from the Golden Globes. [New York Magazine]

This week, a federal court ruled against an FCC initiative that sought to provide Internet users with equal access to all websites and services, threatening the country's "net neutrality." On the same day, a 12-year-old middle school student in New Mexico was taken into custody after seriously wounding two students in a school shooting.

Welcome back to NEWSFLASH, giving you the week's biggest stories!

Federal Court Sweeps Aside Net Neutrality Ruling

On Tuesday, a federal appeals court overturned a government ruling to ensure net neutrality for all Internet users on all Internet providers. 

With Tuesday's new ruling, Internet providers like Verizon, Comcast and AT&T could impede their subscribers from accessing certain Internet service providers' products. This would be done by charging companies such as Netflix and YouTube more money for delivering their services to users without exceeding data limits, an initiative AT&T has already proposed in a Sponsored Data plan. Other ways of threatening equal web access include redirecting traffic toward or away from other sites, such as when Comcast purposely slowed down BitTorrent after the torrenting site was "hogging its pipes."

The court's ruling essentially overturned one established in 2010 led by the Federal Communications Commission. The 2010 ruling urged Internet providers to treat all Internet traffic, both by phone and by computer, as part of the same Internet category. Verizon sued on the grounds that Internet access on both could not be treated similarly, leading the federal court to overrule the FCC's 2010 efforts.

Experts are worried that by threatening net neutrality, the federal court is allowing the dominance of Internet giants such as Google to persist and block out other potential contenders. The new ruling could also create an unlevel field for consumers vying for Internet services as some users could access certain sites more easily than others.

12-Year-Old Boy Seriously Wounds Two In Middle School Shooting

A 12-year-old boy in New Mexico was taken into custody after firing on his fellow students in a school gymnasium before a teacher persuaded him to disarm.

The shooting took place Berrendo Middle School in Roswell on Tuesday morning. Two students, an 11-year-old boy and 13-year-old girl, were seriously wounded in the encounter. The girl is now in stable condition while the boy, who was hit in his face and neck, is still listed as being in critical condition.

An eighth grade social studies teacher identified as John Masterson eventually talked the boy into dropping his gun before pinning him to a wall.

Police have determined that the boy planned the attack, though his motive is still unknown. The boy faces three counts of aggravated battery.

Sick of eating cereal and Ramen for lunch and dinner? Want to spend less money eating out and finally start cooking for yourself? Put down that frozen pizza, because HC’s Health Editor, Sammie Levin, is here to share her daily eats so you can get ideas for healthy, satisfying meals that are easy enough for any time-strapped collegiette to make. After you read Collegiette Eats, your taste buds, wallet and waistline will thank you.

Breakfast

I didn't have any fresh bananas or berries yesterday morning, so I made oatmeal with frozen mixed berries and frozen cherries. I warmed them up in the microwave for a bit and then mixed them with oatmeal, flaxseed and almond butter.

Lunch

For lunch, I was in the mood for something tropical to combat this awful winter weather, so I made a smoothie. It was so good—thick, fruity and sweet! And a good balance of protein and healthy fats from the Greek yogurt and chia seeds. 

I blended together the following ingredients:

• ½ cup frozen mango
• ½ frozen banana
• 1 6-oz container Chobani Greek yogurt (peach flavored)
• ½ cup almond milk
• 2 tablespoons chia seeds

Dinner

For dinner, I had spaghetti squash with garbanzo beans, sautéed spinach and mushrooms, topped with roasted garlic marinara sauce. If you haven’t had spaghetti squash before, put down your laptop now and go buy one immediately. Seriously, it’s amazing. The strands function as noodles, so you can use it as a low-calorie, nutrient-packed substitute for pasta. It’s really versatile, too, because you can use any sauce or add in any ingredients that you like, so it’s easy to switch it up. Plus, one squash makes a ton of “spaghetti,” so you can have enough for two to three meals.

To make it, you just cut the spaghetti squash in half (it’s big and dense, so you’ll need a really sharp, sizable knife), scoop out the seeds and rub the insides with a little olive oil and sprinkle them with salt and pepper. Then, you bake it at 375 degrees for about 40-50 minutes, until the squash is tender. Once you take the squash out of the oven, let it cool and then scrape the insides out into a bowl with a fork. The fork scraping against the squash is what creates the strands. And that’s it! It’s a little bit more work then just boiling water and putting a box of pasta in, but it’s definitely manageable and worth the extra time! 

If you're still reading and you haven’t already left to go buy a spaghetti squash, now’s your time. Go! 

Do you ever find yourself shrugging your shoulders and settling on the "boys will be boys" conclusion? Real Live College Guy Andy is here to show you that mature men do (in fact) exist. He has an uncanny ability to sort out the good guys from the bad apples and is here to bring you the best in college love advice.

I've been exclusive with a guy for about a month. I've mentioned that I want to hang out more and he seems to be making an effort, but he never, ever, ever texts me. Ever. I always text first, I always make plans (unless it's a late Saturday night plan). He says he doesn't text me because he "forgets" or "is busy."  Am I stupid for giving him the benefit of the doubt? - Confused at Claremont McKenna

Confused,

For self-admitted hopeless romantics like myself and fellow Real Live College Guy Pat Bradley,  these types of questions can be some of the most difficult to answer.

Along with writing for Her Campus Nationals, both of us are active members of the respective HC chapters at our schools. We love girls and we love working with them, so when we get questions about why boyfriends are acting MIA, it's tough. Since we are in the communications business, we despise their lack of communicating just as much as you do.

Now to put it bluntly, yes, I think in this case you are being "stupid" for giving him the benefit of the doubt. 

Personally, I'm not one to give bad communicators any excuse. Those "I was busy" or "I forgot" reasons for not texting are complete and total hogwash. It's not difficult to text first. Call me old-fashioned, but the boyfriend should be setting up dates at least once every weekend. So yes, your boyfriend should be doing a better job seeking you out. He should want to text you. He should want to hang out with you every day. So failing to initiate conversation at least a few times a week with you is a major relationship error. It's not difficult to pick up the phone before you go to bed to chat for a few minutes. It’s unfair to you!

Simply put, communicating frequently and doing so honestly are two crucial parts of making a relationship work. And this boyfriend of yours is failing miserably at both.

Plus to make matters worse it sounds as if making plans with him is like pulling teeth. Unless we are talking about long distance, neither party in a relationship should ever be bothered about the lack of face time with each other.

It sounds to me like this boyfriend of yours is treating you like nothing but a booty call. There is little more you can do with this guy. There is no magic switch you can flip to get him to be a better communicator. It's time to find someone better. I would instead find someone who will gladly send you a good morning text. There are guys out there who will do that.

When I used to think of the perfect love story, I never imagined it taking place on an online dating site. There’s a stigma against dating websites—people think they’re only for creepy, middle-aged people looking for that someone special in their life. That’s not the case for me. I met my boyfriend of almost a year on an app called Tinder.

The app is hooked up to your Facebook, and it shows you other users in your local area. All you have to do is swipe left on their photos to say you’re not interested in them or right to say you’re interested in them. The other person will never know you like them unless they like you back. Once you both decide that the other person is hot, then you have the option of chatting.

This app may seem like the perfect way to meet people, but it has really become more of a breeding ground for hook-ups and insignificant flings. That’s why it’s so unbelievable that I not only found someone I can relate to, but also my best friend and someone who I can see myself spending the rest of my life with. As my boyfriend and I like to say, “Everything changed when we swiped right.”

It began in the spring of 2013. I was finishing up my senior year of high school and had been going on random little dates throughout the year, but I was never really into anyone at my school. Just when I was starting to think that dating was pointless and a waste of time, my friends all started getting this new app called Tinder and were talking to some interesting guys. There was not a single guy they talked to who had honest intentions; many of them were just interested in meeting and hooking up. Regardless of how long my friends talked to the guys, every conversation ended in the guy asking for suggestive pictures or asking when they could meet up to “fool around.” Even though my friends had bad experiences with the app, they were very persistent, and eventually they convinced me to get the app too.

However, all of the guys I encountered on the app were either super old or just wanted a quick hook-up (one guy even invited me to his frat formal… which was a year from then). I had gotten to the point where I was ready to give up on this stupid app and set my goals on dating someone in college. Luckily, I opened the app one last time, and I saw that I had gotten a message from a guy who I didn’t remember liking named Nathan.

Tinder works by using your most recent profile pictures. So from the few pictures provided of Nathan, I was able to see that he was a tall, blond guy with bright blue eyes, but I was a little cautious because he was holding a baby who looked very much like him. Even though I knew that he could potentially have a baby, I messaged him back and ended up chatting on Tinder with him for a few hours before I gave him my number.

My conversation with this guy was immediately different from any other guy I had talked to. Many of the other guys had initially asked me about myself but then would ask if we could text or Snapchat, only to ask for pictures soon after. The main difference, though, was that he never called me nicknames like “sexy,” “baby” or “babe” like the other guys. Nathan was also the first guy who made an effort for us to get to know each other as normally as possible. I felt like a real person with this guy instead of being treated like an object.

After adding Nathan on Facebook and continuing to talk to him, I learned three very interesting things about him. First, I learned that the baby he was holding in the picture wasn’t his own daughter, but his brother’s, which was a huge relief. Second, I learned that he was born and raised in Michigan and he goes to the University of Michigan, but he was in Texas for a yearlong internship. The last thing that I learned was that he came from a big family; he is the youngest of 12 siblings. Something about him just seemed so intriguing to me, and I continued to text him throughout the week.

In one of those conversations, he asked me out on a date for the upcoming weekend. As weird as it sounds, I never questioned if I should go out with him. Something about him just felt right.

Saturday rolled around, and I was so anxious to finally meet this guy in person. I will always remember the moment that I opened my front door and saw him for the first time.

He was more than I expected. He was so calm as he stood there smiling at me with that amazing smile I’ve come to love. He also came inside and was a gentleman when he met my parents.   We ended up going out to dinner at an outdoor mall and watching a live band perform. We talked for six hours, never having any awkward moments that led me to regret my decision. Then, at the end of the date, I got the most amazing first kiss of my life.

The following weekend was my prom. Unfortunately, I had already told a friend I would be his date, so Nathan and I agreed that he would pick me up from prom and we would go to the after-party together. Once at the party, he called me over to sit next to him at my friend’s piano, smiled at me and started playing. As we both sat there at the piano, he suddenly switched songs. I immediately recognized that he was playing my favorite song, Billy Joel’s “She’s Got A Way,” which I vaguely remembered mentioning on our first date. While he serenaded me on the piano, he asked me to be his girlfriend. As he sat there playing this song about a beautiful girl, I remember looking over at him and in that exact moment knowing I already loved him.

At the beginning of our relationship, we kept the truth of how we actually met a secret. We even fabricated a cover story to tell people when they asked. Nathan chose to be very upfront with his friends and family and told them the truth. While I told my closest friends, I avoided mentioning it to my parents, fearing they might make us break up. Over time we started telling more and more people, and the general reactions we got were, “Do you know how lucky you two are?” or, “You hit the jackpot!” or, “Something bad could’ve happened.” After constantly hearing those comments, we realized that we had been extremely lucky.

After almost six months of dating, I worked up the courage and called my parents to finally tell them the truth. Naturally, they had the same reaction and reminded me how dangerous going on Tinder was. Thankfully, after some long talks they forgave me and told me how glad they were that I had met Nathan.

As the school year came to a close and graduation came and went, I began to wonder what this summer had in store for my relationship. Words can’t even begin to describe the summer that Nathan and I had together. We spent every single free moment we had with each other. Even though we were both working and I was taking summer classes, we made as much time as we could for each other. In those moments when we weren’t together, we would email each other at work, text each other funny pictures and plan our next hangout. Every month on the fifth, we would celebrate another month of happiness and memories. There were so many moments when we would both just sit in shock at the reality of our relationship. How was it possible for two total strangers to have met on Tinder, actually get along and even fall in love?

Yes, it was amazing to find love on an online dating site, but the real test was what came next. As the summer came to a close, it hit us both that we would no longer be in the same city. I was starting my freshman year of college, and he was going back home to Michigan to finish his senior year of college. We were faced with the choice of ending our relationship or starting a long-distance relationship, but we both knew the right choice.

The first time saying goodbye to each other was the hardest. As we stood there sobbing, we knew it was going to be a challenge to keep our relationship strong, but we had no idea the challenges we would face in those two months apart. On most days I would wake up feeling a knot in my stomach from the pain I felt of not being with Nathan. Then I would try to start my day as normal as possible, only to end up crying myself to sleep each night. How is someone supposed to handle being ripped apart from her soul mate and best friend?

We both recently finished our first semester apart and reunited with each other during winter break. These past four months without seeing each other was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I’m so thankful for technology for letting us be able to stay in contact, and for the fact that we didn’t have to go any longer than two months without seeing each other due to having the opportunity to see each other for a weekend. 

I know that Nathan and I are one of the millions of couples that are long distance. The thing that makes us special is that we’re not only beating the odds of maintaining a LDR, we’re also a couple who succeeded thanks to a silly little app.

Do you have a story to share? Submit your story to Her Story! 

Much like that frat star known to take his shirt off at every party or that professor who is a notoriously harsh grader, foods get reputations. But while these reputations may be well known and generally accepted, they’re unfortunately not always true. It’s hard for a greasy slice of pepperoni pizza or a brownie sundae to be mistaken for a nutritious pick, but some foods actually do masquerade as healthy options when, in reality, they’re packed with an excessive amount of fat, calories, sugar, or sodium and lack the health benefits they claim. We talked to expert Susan Holmberg, a nutritionist and behavior modification clinician, and did the detective work to debunk these foods so that you won’t unknowingly do damage to your diet and can make better choices instead.

1.  Fruit-flavored yogurt

Fruit plus yogurt equals healthy, right? Not necessarily. Yogurt with added sugar is the top sneakily unhealthy foods that Holmberg lists. Though many fruit-flavored yogurts boast that they are low-fat or fat-free or low in calories, almost all of the calories they do have are from sugar, rather than something filling like protein or fiber.

A small 6 oz container may have up to 20 grams of sugar—and a Hershey’s chocolate bar has 24 grams. What’s worse is that the jelly-like fruit at the top or bottom, which Holmberg refers to as “junk,” is typically more artificial flavoring than it is fruit.

To avoid a sugar bomb, stick to plain yogurt and mix real fruit (berries, bananas) into it.

Opting for plain Greek yogurt over regular will give you more protein to keep you satisfied, and swirling in a bit of honey can sweeten it up.

2. Pre-packaged salads

Salads have a great rep as being the best option on any menu, but it turns out that not all salads are created equal. According to Daily Mail, “some supermarket salads contain more fat and calories than a Big Mac and fries.” Pre-packaged salads provide on-the-go convenience, but they often are less healthy than you may think due to the pile of cheese, croutons, salt-laden deli meats, and creamy dressings on top.

Avoid making an unhealthy choice by checking the nutrition label—a good ballpark is around 300-500 calories. Keep in mind that a Big Mac has 29 grams of fat, so if the salad in question has a comparable fat content, then nix it… or go for a Big Mac instead. Your best bet is to hit up the salad bar rather than the pre-packaged aisle to ensure freshness and control what goes into your salad. If you are stuck with a pre-packaged salad, take out the cheese, candied nuts or sugar coated dried fruit, and croutons and go easy on the salad dressing to make it healthier.

3.  Granola

With the rep of being a very natural food, granola is a breakfast or snack staple for many collegiettes. But what keeps those oats clustered together is often unhealthy oils and syrups that bring a lot of extra fat and calories to your bowl. From artificial sweeteners and flavors, to high-fructose corn syrup and sugar, a half cup of granola typically contains anywhere from 280-500 calories!

“Freshmen year my friends and I would always eat the granola in the dining hall for breakfast,” says Tara, a sophomore at the University of Michigan. “Then, the calories of all the foods were posted in the dining halls and online, and we were shocked to find out how many calories we were consuming…. a half cup has a whopping 512 calories and we were probably eating more than that every morning!”

If this is the worst news you’ve ever heard, wipe your tears because there are a few ways you can enjoy granola healthfully. First, look for brands that use natural sweeteners in place of artificial ones, such as Bear Naked or Whole Foods. You can check whether or not a certain type of granola is actually “all natural” if high-fructose corn syrup and hydrogenated oils are not on the ingredient list. Furthermore, you can compare the health level of different brands by checking their sugar and fat contents. If your favorite brand of granola happens to be high calorie, then portion control by sticking to the serving size or mixing just a handful of the granola into a lower calorie cereal such as Cheerios, Total, original Fiber One, or original Special K.  

4. Frozen Dinners

Frozen dinners tend to be a college staple because of how convenient and easy to prepare they are—5 minutes in the microwave and voila, dinner is served. While frozen dinners make for good portion control, they are often loaded with salt, sugar, and artificial ingredients to keep the food preserved. Holmberg explains that “most frozen dinners that are starch based—bistro and breakfast sandwiches, rice bowls, pastas, etc.—[are] just a package of sugar really.”

If your schedule, budget, or lack of cooking skills makes frozen dinners a must-have, then opt for brands who aim to provide a healthy meal, such as Lean Cuisine or Amy’s, a natural frozen food brand. Choose dishes that contain vegetables and a lean protein such as chicken or tofu.

5. Trail mix

Trail mix can be healthy in moderation, but often times the packaged kinds you’ll find in convenience stores will have tons of salt and sugar added in for preservation (and taste) reasons, and cause of the chocolate candies often added. And when it comes in a large bag, it can be harder to portion control. Regardless of the kind of trail mix you’re digging into, try to stick to 1-2 handfuls (about ¼ cup) for a snack because the calories in nuts and dried fruit can really add up.

To limit the added coatings of sugar and salt, follow Meredith, a sophomore at the University of Michigan, and make your own! “I mix almonds, cashews, raisins, and dried cranberries and divide it all up into Ziploc baggies so I have a few on hand when I need to take a snack on the go,” she says.  

6. Meal replacement bars

Eating an energy, protein, or granola bar in place of a meal may seem like a convenient way to fill up and skimp on calories, but like all foods on this list, not all meal bars rank the same on health meter. Some have lots of sugar, or lack nutrients you would get from eating a real meal. Plus, for some collegiettes eating a measly bar never actually feels like a meal so you may find yourself craving more food right away.

That being said, bars can make for a great snack in between classes or when you’re in a hurry. Look for ones that aren’t loaded with sugar (Luna bars have about 10 grams each, which is lower than most) and that provide a good source of fiber and protein. Check out this HC article on meal replacement bars to read more and find a healthy choice.

7. Smoothies & fruit drinks

Sugar is once again the culprit when it comes to why these healthy sounding foods end up costing you a lot of calories. Just like with the “fruit” at the bottom of yogurts, smoothies and fruit drinks often have lots of added sugar and don’t necessarily contain a substantial amount of fresh fruit. Fruit juice also tends to be less filling than the fruit itself, so you end up getting less bang for your buck. For example, an apple contains about 70-100 calories, while a cup of apple juice contains 120-140 calories.

So what’s a girl with a smoothie craving to do? Well first, try these healthy, delicious smoothie recipes to keep it natural.

If you don’t have the time (or blender) to make your own, make sure the smoothie you are buying contains fresh fruit and plain yogurt instead of sherbet or ice cream. Otherwise, consider a smoothie more of a dessert and stick to a small. Limiting the amount of liquid calories you consume can drastically cut down your daily intake without affecting your hunger level.   

8. Wheat bread

Wheat bread is often considered to be white bread’s healthier counterpart, but misleading labeling complicates this reputation. Whole grains (i.e., whole wheat bread) are better than refined carbohydrates (i.e., white bread) because they contain more fiber, but bread can be marketed as whole wheat or wheat even when it’s not 100% whole wheat. That means some wheat bread may just be white bread in disguise! Holmberg explains that many “multi-grain” processed foods are made of “all processed grains and have no nutrients left.”

If you’re buying the bread yourself, check to make sure the label says 100% whole wheat or whole grain bread. Keep in mind that the difference in calories between white and wheat bread isn’t big, but the nutrients are! If each slice has more than 110 calories, you can likely find a less caloric brand.

9. Veggie chips

The first word tricks you into thinking that this snack is healthy, but the second word is a more accurate description of what the package really contains—chips! Veggie chips hardly contain vegetables at all (and thus lack their numerous benefits) and are ultimately equivalent to their potato parallels. “There is a sweet potato chip for babies that has no sweet potato in it at all,” Holmberg says. “[Having] no fat doesn't make something a healthy food.”

If chips are a go-to snack of yours, then opt for baked instead of fried or, try popchips, which have half the fat of regular chips.

Rules Of Thumb For Healthy Foods

Holmberg has created a set of guidelines for healthy foods. Keep these standards in mind when you’re choosing a snack or meal!

Healthy foods…

1. Walk, fly, swim, or grow
2. We didn't turn them into something else entirely - like soy chips that are nothing like a soy bean
3. We didn't have to add back in nutrients because we took them all out
4. Don’t have colors or preservatives added
5. Are meal foods, not things that would never be on a plate
6. Frequently don't come in packages with a lot of writing, or in packages at all.
7. The ingredient list has only the things you would expect to find.

Finding out whether a food lives up to its healthy rep or is as nutritious as it’s made out to be can be tricky, but it’s all about checking the nutrition label when it comes to making the healthiest decision. The good news is—there are always healthy alternatives out there!

Though the pixie cut made its big debut more than half a century ago with beauty icons like Audrey Hepburn, Twiggy and Mia Farrow, this fearless hairstyle has made a comeback recently. Pixie cuts have been sported by some of the hottest celebrities, such as Jennifer Lawrence and Beyoncé.

While this daring and modern hairstyle can work with many face shapes, it’s sometimes difficult to determine if you can pull it off, and if you can, which type of pixie cut to get. If you’ve toyed with the idea of a serious trim, these three tips will provide you with the information you need before getting a pixie cut and how to rock it after!

1. Evaluate Your Face Shape

While you may think that some people can naturally pull off a pixie cut while others can’t, celebrity hair expert Angelo David Pisacreta of Angelo David Salon says that “anyone can pull off the pixie cut; it’s just about figuring out the dimensions, then working the hair to fit your facial shape.  ... When asking for a pixie cut from your hairstylist, you want the cut to match the shape of your face to enhance your focal features.”

So if you’re considering a pixie, the first thing to consider is which face shape category you fall into.

Heart-Shaped Faces

Heart-shaped faces, such as Carey Mulligan’s, look best with side-swept bangs and shorter cuts to draw attention to the eyes and create a slimming effect on a wider forehead.

Round Faces

If you have a round face like Michelle Williams, get a slightly longer cut with more body at the top to lengthen and slim your face.

Square Faces

Square-shaped faces, like Keira Knightley’s, look best with front bangs and layers to soften an angular face and jawline. 

Oval Faces

Since oval faces can pull off a wide variety of styles, you have more room for experimentation with your cut. For example, Emma Watson’s versatile pixie cut is an interesting option that is shorter at the nape but features long enough layers to tuck behind her ears or bring forward for a different look.

However, every cut comes out different, so if you have a great facial feature that you’d like to emphasize, you can ask your stylist for a variation that will draw attention to it, such as layers that frame your fabulous cheekbones! 

Another approach is to find acelebrity pixie cut you particularly love on a star with a similar face shape as yours. Bring in a picture and ask your stylist to recreate it. However, if there are aspects of celebrity pixie cuts you’ve seen that you especially dislike, it’s important to bring those in to your stylist as well so you can prevent them from recreating it on you!

2. Maintain Your Style

Although pixie cuts require much less effort on a day-to-day basis, you’ll need to invest in more frequent trips to your hairstylist (every four weeks or so) for upkeep.

It’s also crucial to purchase the right products for at-home styling. Pisacreta recommends using a small amount of a leave-in conditioning product, such as his Vital Complex Leave-In Conditioner ($21.50), which can be used on wet hair before styling to control unruly hair.  After applying the product, you can either leave your hair wet or blow-dry it to keep your hair silky and smooth. You also have the option of using a styling mousse, such as Angelo David’s Foaming Sea Silk Styler ($21.50), to keep hair in place without weighing it down or leaving it rigid and stiff.

Even though shorter hair can be much less of a hassle when you want it to be, you still have other options when it comes to styling, such as changing the texture with a straightening or curling iron.  You can start by using a styling cream or texturizing spray, such as Wella’s Ocean Spritz Beach Texture Hairspray ($16), before you use a curler or straightener, and complete the look with a fixing hairspray, such asJohn Freida’s Frizz Ease Moisture Barrier Firm Hold Hair Spray ($5.99), which will keep your sleek style in place.

3. Own It

As cool and fearless as pixie cuts come across, the only way to pull it off is with a ton of confidence. Pisacreta says a pixie cut is “a huge commitment. You just have to think of the outcome because of the re-growth process—it’s a lifestyle.”

It’s important to take some time to think about whether such a dramatic cut is really right for you. Even if you’re dying to get a pixie, its worth waiting at least a week or two to see if you still feel the same way after some time and consideration. If you have longer hair and you’re considering a pixie cut, it may be a good idea to shorten it in stages if you’re a little bit hesitant. Then, if you ultimately get a pixie cut and decide you hate it, it won’t take as much time to grow back into the bob you liked before you got the pixie cut. 

The great thing about embracing the new lifestyle of a pixie cut is that without hair to hide behind, there’s extra emphasis on your face and all your features.  For this reason, makeup can become your new best friend (if it wasn’t already!). With less hair in your way, you can make an even bigger statement when you try the latest beauty trends, and you can play up your best features in a more effective way than ever before!

In addition, certain accessories and clothes work particularly well with pixie cuts, such as long earrings and backless dresses and tops, since ordinarily these types of trends are overshadowed by longer, more distracting hairstyles. Pixie cuts also have the effect of making you look edgier overall, which can be important to consider when it comes to your fashion decisions. For instance, a bright, floral sundress may come across as sweet and feminine on its own, but when paired with a pixie cut, it becomes bolder and more intriguing, while pieces such as leather jackets and combat boots can look harsh alongside a pixie.  A good way to balance out your look on a day-to-day basis is to always incorporate a feminine piece into your ensemble, such as a pair of bright heels, a cute skirt or lacy top.

Going through these three steps before you get a pixie cut will enable you to carefully consider your decision before you step into a salon. What’s most important is to take time to evaluate the pros and cons, because once you make the bold decision to get a pixie, there’s no turning back. Style challenge accepted!

What’s better than free stuff? Getting free stuff delivered right to your doorstep. Yes, you can get free coffee and beauty products just by letting brands know what you thought about their products!

PINCHme, a newly launched site, allows you to do just this: sample cool new products from leading brands in exchange for quick survey feedback. The more you share your likes, interests and hobbies, the more you will see samples that match your unique interests and preferences. Every two weeks, look through your individualized batch of samples, pick your favorite items and get the products delivered to you for free! Once you receive your product samples, you’ll have a month to try them out and give your feedback.

A few weeks ago we highlighted some great products that were available, and this week, there are all new samples to try! Here are a few of the awesome things you can try out this week when you create an account with PINCHme.

1. Suave smoothing body lotion. The winter weather is wreaking havoc on your skin, so save it with this rich lotion!
2. Montagne Jeunesse Glacial Clay Spa mask. You deserve a little pampering after dealing with a rough week of classes.
3. Maxwell House French Vanilla coffee. Midterms will be here before you know it, and you’re going to need this.
4. Maxwell House Suisse Mocha coffee. If you’re more of a chocolate girl than a vanilla lover, PINCHme has you covered, too!

Name: Erin Greenawald
Age: 22
Job Title and Description: I’m the Editor at The Daily Muse, which means I use the power of words to help people figure out what they want to do with their lives (and give them the tools to get there).
College/Major: American University/Environmental Studies
Twitter Handle: @erinaceously

What does your current job entail? Is there such a thing as a typical day?

Erin Greenawald: I mostly work to support our Editor in Chief, Adrian Granzella Larssen, in making sure we have amazing content to publish every day of the week. So the bulk of my time is working with words, be it writing my own, helping finesse other people’s [writing] or writing email after email to give feedback to my writers.

And while there are some typical things I do regularly—weekly content I must produce, bi-weekly columnists to work with, photos to choose for the site—there’s also a good amount of variation depending on what articles I’m working on and what big projects we’re developing outside of the daily content. So, for example, one week I could be pulling together content for a feature week such as Food Week, the next I could be working on copy for a Muse University class, and the next I could be designing our professional development guides.

What is the best part of your job?

EG: When you work for a startup, everyone has to pull their weight and sometimes do tasks that don’t necessarily fit under your typical job description. This has worked in my favor, allowing me to try on different hats and gain experience in areas I may not have in a position at a larger, more structured publication. Over the years, I’ve gotten to try my hand at email marketing, social media, event planning, design and more. I’ve gotten to watch from the front lines as our CEO fundraises and our COO plans out the product, and I’ve gotten to participate in big conversations about the direction of our publication.

It’s been so exhilarating to both get to do what I enjoy doing and what I’m good at, but to also experience a business growing from all sides.
 
What was your first entry-level job in your field and how did you get it?

EG: Believe it or not, this is my first job in the field! I started out over two years ago as an editorial intern with The Daily Muse, right when the company was starting out. I had barely any editorial background when I interviewed—just a couple writing classes and a little work with our school paper’s blog—but I was interested in the space and loved what the company was setting out to do, so I gave it a shot. Thank goodness I did.

After that, I just worked as hard as I could to learn fast, prove my worth, and ultimately create my position in the company. Before I knew it, my internship had become a part-time paid position with the promise of a job as soon as I graduated. I’ve been incredibly lucky to be given the amount of responsibility I have been at such an early stage, and really attribute it to my ability to just jump at an opportunity outside of my comfort zone and work at it, or even ask for help, until I figure it out.

What is one thing you wish you knew about your industry when you first started out that you know now?

EG: This isn’t really industry-focused, but I wish I had really understood the nature of networking. I had read countless articles on our site about the importance of networking, and had been pushed by my boss to be building relationships for the company, but had always avoided networking as much as possible because I thought I was bad at it. When I would go to big networking events, I would freeze up and feel awkward.

I now realize that there are many ways to network, some of which I excel at. Even though walking into a big room and working it will probably never be my thing, chatting one-on-one over coffee or meeting and collaborating at a conference allow me to build relationships in a way that makes sense for me.

Who is one person who changed your professional life for the better?

EG: My mom. She was the one who, when I was hesitating to apply to this internship because of a wave of uncertainties, told me that it seemed like an opportunity that was too good a fit to pass up and reminded me that the worst they could do was say no. Without her, I may not have leapt for it. And I’ve done my best to carry that “the worst they can do is say no” mentality with me since then, which has gotten me a lot of yes’s that I wouldn’t have gotten otherwise.
 
What words of wisdom do you find most valuable?

EG: It’s kind of silly, but I have a desktop background that says, “Quit slackin’ and make s**t happen.” I have a terrible propensity to procrastinate, so it’s a nice little reminder that I’ve got to put in the work if I want to see the results.

What is one mistake you made along the way and what did you learn from it?

EG: You know, I always expect to get this question in interviews, but I always hate it because I can never think of anything! And that’s not to say I’m perfect and have made no mistakes—because I have—but I’m not the type to dwell on mistakes.

It’s kind of the startup “fail fast” mentality. Sure, I’ve made mistakes. I’ve done things that haven’t worked out. But I’ve learned from them, corrected quickly and moved on. I don’t have space in my mind to remember the details of the mistake itself, but I’ve internalized the lessons learned.

That being said, I’m still working on not letting my age hold me back in my career. I often feel very self-conscious that I am so young—ashamed even—but am working on reminding myself that experience, abilities and the way I carry myself matter more than my birth date.

What do you look for when considering hiring someone?

EG: Since we’re still a small staff, I haven’t gotten to hire anyone since joining the team full time. When I do get to hire, I would look for someone who has a proven record of working hard, but who isn’t obviously trying too hard in the interview process. A relaxed confidence, if you will.

Oh, and don’t make any mistakes in your resume, cover letter, or any other communications. While that’s true for any job you’re applying to, it’s especially true for editorial positions.
 
What advice would you give to a 20-something with similar aspirations?

EG: Just start. If you know you want to be writing, start writing in whatever way you can to build your portfolio and expertise. If you don’t know exactly what you want to be doing, that’s okay, but start something. Once you start doing, you’ll be able to learn more about what’s a fit and what’s not.

Text messaging is great. Not only is it convenient and quick, but it’s also less pressured than traditional calling and is an awesome tool to use for flirting when a class lecture is oh-so-dull. The only downside to texting, of course, is the lack of the nonverbal and verbal cues we take for granted in face-to-face communication. When you and your guy are texting, you can’t read his facial expressions, his body language, or his tone of voice when he tells you something.

If you’ve been getting texts from guys that have you running to your roommate and going “Huh?” (and who doesn't?) you’re in luck! We asked a few college guys to give us the scoop on what their texts really mean. And if you’ve got a guy who isn’t texting you back, there could be 100 reasons why. (Advice: Stop texting that guy.)

According to Sean, one of our Real Live College Guys, you’ll get a response from a guy every time when he likes you (as a friend or more). So let’s tackle the texts we’re getting from the guys!


The “Good Morning” Text

All of the guys we surveyed indicated that a text first thing in the morning from your guy is a good sign. Rob*, a Hiram College senior, says, “I’ll text something like ‘Good morning, sunshine’ to wake her up and keep her smiling all day.” When a guy sends you this kind of text, (especially the morning after a date or hook-up), it means that he’s thinking about you and wants you to think about him the rest of the day.

Text back: “Good morning! I’m about to go get breakfast. Wanna join me? ;)” Why wait to see him? Mention that you’re heading to the dining hall for breakfast or invite him to join you on your Starbucks run.

The “Friend-Zoning” Text

Friend-zoning texts tend to include the words “like a sister to me” or “buddy” or “pal” in them. You know how it goes. You met this great guy at a party, and he’s been texting you about some hobby you share or something funny you both witnessed. Then you start flirting, and the guy starts calling you his buddy whenever he responds to you. According to Sean, friend-zoning texts are “the kiss of death for flirting.”

Text back: nothing. While your guy could be lying, as proven by this study, it’s a safe bet that it would be a good idea to cool your flirting. If you keep trying to flirt with a guy who has sent you the friend-zoning text, you risk scaring him off. “Unless you’re actually looking for male friendship, move on,” Sean says. “The friend zone is a dead end.”

The “I have to cancel” Text

So you and your guy planned a date for tonight, but he texts you and says he’s sick and has to cancel. If he doesn’t offer to reschedule, he could be standing you up. “Unless I’m actually sick, it means I don’t want to really hang out,” says Paul*, a Hobart College junior. So how can you tell for sure?

Text back: “Aw. I can bring you soup or [other item to cheer him up].” According to Sean, a guy who is genuinely sick will likely accept your offer of comfort. “Most guys would love some TLC when they’re feeling ill,” says Sean. And if the guy declines your offer or suddenly got sick only an hour before he’s supposed to see you? “He’s probably blowing you off,” Sean says. A guy who likes you will either reschedule the date or find another way to see you. Nothing short of the end of the world will stop him.

The “one-word” Text

One-word texts are the most frustrating texts of all. Usually, this means that he doesn’t want to take the time to send you a full reply because he’s otherwise preoccupied and doesn’t want you to think he’s ignoring you. It can also mean he’s annoyed about something. Matt, who recently graduated from Stark State College, says, “He’s not wanting to talk or something at least is bothering him, and he’s being short for a reason.”

Text back: “Not very talkative today, eh?” According to Sean, this will help you gauge the situation. Your guy might respond with a longer answer and let you know what’s up, and you can take it from there. Unless you’ve asked a question that only requires a one-word answer, regular short responses from a guy you’re flirting with are a bad sign.

The Compliment Text

If you’re getting compliments, then you’re in luck. He likes you! He really, really likes you! According to our survey, guys compliment girls who’ve snagged their interest. Tue, a University of Louisville sophomore, says, “If I like a girl, I’ll text some compliment that I like about her distinct personality.”

Text back: “Thank you! You’re not too bad yourself!” You want to make sure to thank him and follow up by complimenting him as well. It’s a great opportunity to try out your flirtexting. Keep it light and fun. Hopefully, it will lead to a date!

The Random “Come Over” Text

According to Ben, a University of Pittsburgh senior, a guy who sends you a late-night text and asks to come over wants a booty call. He’s not making a date, which usually requires more time to plan, but he does want to see you... for sex. “I texted ‘hey, sweetness’ as a joke once, and it actually worked. I use it mostly for booty calls,” Ben says. Then he often asks the girl if she wants to come over or if he can come over to her place.

Text back: Yes or no, depending on whether you want to be a booty call or not. You can also text him back and tell him that you’re not interested and let the subject drop. If you’re a girl who’s looking for a committed relationship, guys who send you these kinds of texts early in the dating game should be crossed off your list.

The Explicit Photo Text

This kind of text has no alternative meaning. Sean says, “When a guy starts sexting, he wants sex, 100 percent of the time.” Your sexting partner is being upfront with what he wants, so be honest with what you want. Do you want to have casual sex with him? If so, it’s time to find that sexy Victoria’s Secret lingerie set.

Text back: A racy (but not over the top) photo. Check out our guide to sexting before you begin. Reveal enough to get him excited to see you, but don’t reveal so much that your sexy photo ends up somewhere you wouldn’t want it to be. Sexting is fun, but just like sex, you still need to be safe.

Need more guy behavior decoded?  Submit a question to our Real Live College Guys!

When Russia was selected in 2007 to host the upcoming Winter Olympics, the small resort town of Sochi seemed like an unusual choice of host city for the massive country. Now, seven years later, take a look at what Russia has done to transform this coastal town into the stage of the largest Winter Olympics to date.

1. The 2014 Winter Olympics will be the most expensive Games ever. Russia has already spent $51 billion dollars on this year’s Games, surpassing the $40 million dollars that China spent on the much larger 2008 Summer Olympics. 

2. The Sochi Olympic complex boasts new hotels in the mountains, newly constructed roads and railways, an Olympic village, two competition "clusters" and 11 world-class arenas. The two-cluster system is a new concept that has required Russian officials to build brand new railway and road systems to accommodate the setup. 

3. The 2014 Winter Olympics will welcome 12 new events: biathalon mixed relay, team figure skating, luge team relay, ski halfpipe (men’s and women’s), ski slopestyle (men’s and women’s), snowboard slopestyle (men’s and women’s), snowboard parallel slalom (men’s and women’s) and women’s ski jumping.

4. Sochi, Russia, isn’t the arctic tundra you might expect. The Sochi region is actually a subtropical region of Russia with February temperatures that reached 63 degrees Fahrenheit last year. The Games will likely require massive amounts of man-made snow to be brought in for the events.

5. In 2007, Sochi, Russia, beat out competitors Pyeongchang, South Korea; and Salzburg, Austria; to be the host of the 2014 Winter Games.

6. The 2014 Olympic torch relay will be the longest and most ambitious ever when it ends on February 7. The torch will have traveled for 123 days through Russia’s city streets, through its surrounding countries, to the North Pole and even to space.

7. The 2014 Sochi Olympic medals feature a mosaic quilt with scenes of Russian culture. A record number of about 1,300 medals will be given out this year due to the 12 new events being added. Some Olympic gold medals will even contain fragments of the meteorite that exploded over Chelyabinsk almost a year ago to commemorate the February 15 anniversary of the event. See the entire process of the medal manufacturing here.

8. The snow leopard, hare and polar bear are the official mascots of the 2014 Winter Olympics.

9. This will be the first Team USA trip to the Olympic Games in Russia. The 1980 Summer Olympics were hosted by Moscow, but the US boycotted due to Cold War tensions.

For more reasons to watch this year's winter Olympics, check out the 10 hottest athletes who will be competing. Good luck to our USA competitors!

So you’re single. Maybe you and your ex have just called things off after weeks and weeks of arguing and silence. You thought you’d be relieved after all the drama passed, but instead you find yourself lonely and craving someone to cuddle with at night. Or maybe the two of you have been apart for a while, and every so often you find yourself thinking about him or her.

The thought crosses your mind to just find somebody new, but you’re not ready for all of that. All you’re looking for is a little attention, not a new boyfriend. So is it bad to call your ex for a little fun?

It all depends. Maybe you’ve both matured, maybe enough time has passed or maybe it could be the worst possible move you could make right now.

Every situation is different, and you should do what works for you after weighing the options. Read on for the pros and cons of rekindling the physical side of a past relationship.

The Pros of Hooking Up

1. You Already Know Each Other

Hooking up with someone new is exciting, but it takes so much effort: introducing yourself, coming across smoothly, finding a graceful exit if the night takes a weird turn, etc. With your ex, however, you're in familiar territory. Sure, there’s no thrill of the unknown, but you'll probably have an enjoyable time. 

“Ex hook-ups are great because you can skip all the awkwardness of first-time hook-ups, and an ex is already aware of the things you like/don't [like],” says Sammi Baum, a junior at the University of Hawaii.

Tina B. Tessina, author of The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again, thinks hooking up with an ex isn’t such a bad idea. “Not only are you already comfortable with this person sexually, but also there's little at stake since the relationship aspect is over," she says.

2. It Could Lead to a Reunion

Maybe your relationship ended over something frivolous. Maybe it was simply bad timing. While you shouldn’t let a hook-up be the sole reason you give a relationship another shot, it could be just what the two of you need to get the ball rolling.

Rachel McHugh, a junior at Lancaster University, used to think that hooking up with exes was a stupid thing to do. However, in her last year of high school, Rachel ignored all previous instincts and gave her ex another shot. “Five years on and we are still together, and I'm so glad I gave him a chance,” she says.

The Cons of Hooking Up

1. The Drama: Round Two

You broke up for a reason, and chances are whoever feels he or she was wronged during the breakup will find some way to voice that grievance during the reunion. Who wants to have a couples’ fight with someone you are no longer coupled with?

Allie Sutherland, a senior at Syracuse University, says she found this out after hooking up with an ex. “It felt fine very briefly, but it didn't change any of the reasons we initially broke up, and I know that the reason I did it was because I just missed the feeling of being with a guy I was comfortable with more than I missed the actual person,” she says.

2. You Risk Getting Reattached

It's always a bad idea to hook up with your ex if one of you still has feelings for the other. If he's not over the relationship (and you are), just go for someone else. If you're not over the relationship (and he is), you'll just prolong the time it takes for you to move on.

Jordan Sypek, a junior at the University of Tampa, has hooked up with an ex before. However, she thinks that if you’re still not over your ex, you shouldn’t hook up with him.

“Getting with an ex while you still think of him every day is a horrible idea,” she says. “It will leave you even more sad because you got a little taste of what you used to have, but won't ever have again.”

Dr. Michelle Golland, a California-based clinical psychologist and relationship expert, says that although returning to a former lover may seem comfortable and convenient, it could actually be a sign that you’re not willing to fully move on from the relationship.

"It's just a sign [that] you're not ready to really end this and create a new life for yourself," she says. "It's really unhealthy to lead each other on emotionally.”

3. Your Health Could Be at Risk

Even if the number of partners you’ve been with hasn’t changed, your ex’s could have. Hooking up with or without asking about his or her sexual history could lead to you contracting an STD.  Be sure you both get tested before any hook-ups occur. Not all sexually transmitted diseases show obvious symptoms, and it’s better to be safe than sorry.

If You DO Hook Up, Here’s What You Should Do

Let Enough Time Pass

If you want to start hooking up with your ex, you should wait until at least a few months, if not more, have gone by. Even if you had an amicable and mutual breakup, you should let the dust settle before you try to get back in bed with your ex, or things are bound to get complicated.

Make Your Intentions Clear

Before you even touch your ex's lips with your own, you should make your intentions and expectations clear. Tell him you want to hook up without any strings attached, that you're not looking to get back into the relationship and that you just want to have a little fun. Let him know you only want to see him to hook up, not to do all the date-y stuff that leads to hooking up.

Or, if you are looking at a hook-up as a way to get back with an ex, be upfront about it. Give him a chance to express his intentions and feelings about the situation. That way, you’re better able to make an informed decision. But if you both really are looking for the same thing, then it's safe to go for it.

If You DON’T Hook Up, Here’s What You Should Do

Try Something New

Boredom is a big reason why some people go back for another round with their exes. To keep yourself occupied and not reveling in the past, try a new hobby or sport. Check out our story on six new hobbies to try out!

Break Out of Your Comfort Zone

With an ex, you're regressing. You're trying to recapture what's already gone. Besides, you might be missing out on someone new. Try your luck with the guy from your psychology class you’ve had a crush on since last semester. Who knows, maybe he felt the same way! Why not give it a shot? Starting over may be hard, but the beginning of a relationship can be fun and carefree, so give it a try. Even if nothing comes out of it, you may have found a new study buddy or a good friend.

Before you decide to hook up or not, be sure to weigh your options. A few hours of fun can lead to something you deeply regret later. Collegiettes, have you ever hooked up with an ex? Is it ever a good idea? Let us know in the comments below!