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17 Important New Year's Resolutions You'll Be Making This Year


Last year for the new year, you resolved to give up chocolate, pizza and alcohol, and to work out five to six times a week. But after washing down a margherita with some M&Ms (Princess Diaries style) on January 2, it became quickly apparent that your healthiest year yet would have to wait.

In 2016, why not set some resolutions that you actually want to keep? Here's what we're thinking.

1. Work out the least possible

It's all about horizontal running, anyway. The treadmill is so 2015.

2. Continue to look fabulous 24/7 regardless


3. Stay true to your principles

4. Get lit

Also use more British slang.

5. Finish the 5-7 shows you started watching over break

Netflix is your cardio.

6. Try every hybrid food in a 20-mile radius of your campus

Aaaww yeah, give us all the cronuts.

7. Stop apologizing for your Instagram habits

8. And for being yourself

9. Actually, just stop apologizing period

Assert yoself!

10. Get froyo at least once a week

Howard is a man who knows his priorities.

11. Start a girl squad to put Taylor Swift to shame

Karlie who?

12. Find a new boy band to pretend you hate

You're going to miss the lads, no matter how much you deny it.

13. Attempt to flirt


14. Go pants-less and bra-less as often as humanly possible


15. Skip the Starbucks to save $$$

Haha, jk.

16. Add "avoiding responsibilities" to your résumé


What research paper?

17. Basically just keep doing you

Happy new year, you beautiful human, you.

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