Out of all 365 days in a year, Valentine’s Day is the one where you really don’t want to screw up. Your girlfriend has anxiously been waiting to nail down a Prince Charming (or at least a guy, in general) to wine and dine her on that special Hallmark day since basically forever. She wants that ah-mazing date planned that she can go back and brag about to her single friends. But just how do you make all that magic possible? Well, you can start by totally, definitely avoiding everything on oureight things not do for your girlfriend on Valentine’s Day. After that, the ball’s in your court—good luck, boys!
Plan a boys’ night and invite her to tag along
We get it; you like to bro out—eat wings, watch the big game, and scratch yourself, the usual. But, it’s Valentine’s Day, and you could have literally picked any other day to plan a guys’ night. Rearrange your schedule so that your girlfriend is your number one choice for the day. Once the clock strikes midnight, then you can go off and frolic with your boys. But for 24 hours, you’re all hers. Because let’s be honest, nothing says love and romance quite like an evening spent in front of the big screen with a couple of beers, some poker chips, and an endless trays of nachos. Joke.
Pass out
Whatever you do, please (seriously, we’re begging you) don’t fall asleep. Whether she makes you watch The Notebook for the hundredth time or you’ve had one too many champagne flutes (if you’re 21, of course), make it your ultimate V-Day goal to stay wide awake. Not only will your girlfriend be totally pissed that you couldn’t manage to remain conscious for the entirety of your date, but she may also take a lesson from the books and seek her revenge—a.k.a, looks like the 15th may be filled with a movie marathon of the world’s sappiest love stories and a full body wax… for you.
Dump her or cheat on her
Can’t it wait another day? You’ll literally scar her for life, and forever be known as the guy who stomped on her heart on Hallmark’s most romantic day, ever. Either get it done beforehand, or wait it out until after V-Day to call it quits. It’s just common courtesy.
Surprise her with… nothing!
Girls are complicated, to say the least. They’ll tell you they’re fine when in actuality they want to scream at you for hours on end. But what makes them even trickier? They’ll tell you no gifts, no presents, no surprises: “There’s nothing I really want. Don’t waste your time finding me the perfect present!” Although you may think you’re all clear, news flash, she’s lying. Show your girlfriend that even though she “begged” and “pleaded” for nothing on V-Day, you still made the effort to get her something.
Buy her lingerie without consulting her
Don’t do it because it lands you in an awkward situation. If you get a piece too big, she’ll take it the wrong way—does she look fatter than she thought? And if you get it too small? Well, talk about an uncomfortable situation while she tries to struggle and squeeze her way into it. If you want to spice things up, mention it to her, and hopefully, she’ll come sauntering into the bedroom wearing something hot that also totally fits—or give you pointers on what to get her.
Complain
All the lovey-dovey couples, romantic roses, and heart-warming acts of kindness are bound to get a little old come the end of the night. But, despite all the sappiness surrounding you, don’t complain about it. Don’t gag at the grand gestures, or roll your eyes at the sentimental gifts. You’re not the only one to be annoyed and overwhelmed by it, but don’t let your girlfriend see you sweat. She’s most likely jealous of all those other girls.
Don’t bring her to your usual restaurant
Plan something special, hello! Make your date something out of the ordinary and sweep her off her feet—she won’t know what’s coming and she’ll absolutely love it. But just a little hint: don’t bring her to a place where you have to eat with your hands. We’re all a fan of Medieval Times, crab joints and barbecue restaurants, but save those for a post V-Day celebration. A date that includes licking your hands or having to use a wet-nap? Yeah, no…
Bring along a third wheel
Just because your BFF may be flying solo for the night, doesn’t mean you should invite him to tag along. Not only will it totally crush the evening, but everyone will feel awkward, especially your girlfriend while you obsess over your best friend and his singleness.