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Real Live College Guy: We’ve Never Spoken—How Do I Talk to Him?

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We all need a little guidance now and then, so whether you’re stressed about a fling gone wrong, a recently wrecked relationship or how to handle a stage-five clinger, Real Live College Guy Dale is here to help you navigate the college dating scene.

I have a huge crush on this guy at the gym! He is there every morning, and I really want to talk to him. The other day, I was going to ask him how to work out a certain muscle, but my nerves stopped me from doing so. How do I get the courage to finally talk to this guy? Also, I don't want this to go nowhere, like me just asking him a question and then waiting for weeks on end for him to talk to me again. Please give me some advice! Also, I have never met him or spoken to him before. –Ripped at Rutgers

Rutgers,

There is perhaps nothing more awkward than asking someone out in his or her most disheveled state: post- or mid-workout, drenched in sweat, gasping for breath. Right off the bat, I can’t say I’d suggest doing that.

Of course, that isn’t to say that your idea of asking him for help wasn’t clever, but let me put things in a different light for you: You already have the courage to work out in front of dozens of other people. That right there? Hell, that takes more courage than asking someone out, at least in my opinion. People staring at you, possibly judging you for using a machine incorrectly? Just the thought of it makes my skin crawl (which is why I haven’t hit the gym in… oh, look at that, ever).

You’re already working out in front of other people, Rutgers. You don’t need more courage, per se; you need to get an actual plan.

My advice to you is that you shouldn’t ask him out in between routines. That’s awkward. Working out is private, personal time. He, much like you, didn’t go to the gym to get hit on. I think your best bet is catching up with him as he’s leaving and asking him out then.

Or, you could pursue your, “I need help with this workout…” option and, instead of asking him out then, throw out the offer of grabbing a drink with him after you’re both done. I don’t mean alcohol here, by the way; I mean Gatorade or protein shakes or whatever it is people drink at the gym. Be casual about it, and don’t be upset if he says no.

Fill out my online form.

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