Facebook may be one of the greatest and worst things that has happened to us. It’s a great way to keep in touch with friends, a forum to post pictures and an outlet to post our feelings (even though no one really cares… like, at all). It also fuels one of our guiltiest pleasures: Facebook stalking. Sometimes it’s our friends, sometimes it’s ourselves, and sometimes it’s the most random people from high school. But most of the time, it’s our crushes. Here are every girl’s typical thoughts while Facebook stalking her crush.
1. “Hey, look - [insert crush’s name here] just got tagged in some pictures.” *Click*
2. “Oh, wow, he looks so hot in that shirt.”
3. “His arms. Like, I want those arms around me.”
4. “Okay, who’s that girl?”
5. “Seriously, who is that girl hanging all over him?”
6. “I wonder if they’re dating… I hope they’re not hooking up.”
7. “I need to do further research.” *Goes to Facebook profile*
8. “I’m gonna go through a few of his pictures...”
1,238 pictures later:
9. “Aw, look how awkward and cute he was in seventh grade! Acne and all.”
10. "Oh no, I just liked one of his super-old pictures. What do I do? WHAT DO I DO?!"
11. "I'm gonna stalk our friendship. Oh, look - we're tagged in a picture together. I think that's me in the far back corner behind that insanely tall kid."
12. "HE WISHED ME HAPPY BIRTHDAY LAST YEAR! ARE WE DATING??"
13. “I wonder what he’s into. I’m gonna check out his likes…”
14. “He likes Workaholics?! I’ve seen that show. I should bring that up the next time I see him.”
15. “Aww, he has his mom listed on Facebook. I wonder what she’s like.”
16. "Is it weird that I now know where both of his parents went to high school?"
17. "His dog has a Facebook page?! Haha, his mom is too funny."
18. *30 minutes later* “How did I end up on this random girl from Wyoming’s Facebook page?”
What started as an innocent click on some tagged pictures turns into a private investigation of our crush and everyone he knows. And, before we know it, we look at our clocks and realize we’ve been distracted for hours. Regardless, we’re all guilty of Facebook stalking, and there’s nothing with that. You keep doin’ you, girl!