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15 Signs You Might Be a Fruit Fly

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If you’re someone who spends the majority of her time with gay men, chances are at some point or another you’ve been called a fruit fly. But don’t fret, ladies; let that fruit flag fly and embrace your colorful lifestyle! Go out and paint the town rainbow.

1. You can name at least three contestants from RuPaul’s Drag Race.

Because, let’s face it: it’s like America’s Next Top Model, but better!

2. You know all the gay drama happening on campus, even though it has no relevance to your life whatsoever.

As if knowing that Julio is cheating on Brad with Marcus is somehow going to help you in life.

3. You and your gay best friend have a plan to marry each other if you can’t find significant others by the time you’re 30.

Marriages of convenience are so in right now.

4.  You’ve been asked at one point or another to carry your friend’s baby.

And, okay, you’ve been slightly tempted.

5.  You’ve had at least three friends come out to you – and you’ve had to pretend you were surprised each and every time.

You should really consider an acting career.

6. You’ve binge-watched 1 Girl 5 Gays before.

Too gay too function.

7. You’ve lost the ability to communicate with any man who doesn’t like men.

What? Hetero men are a completely different species.

8.It takes all of your willpower to not punch someone in the face when they say something ignorant about LGBTQ+ people.

#BYEBIGOTS

9. Your parents no longer question you when you ask if a boy can sleep over.

Can’t wait to talk about boys all night!

10. You and the bartender at your local gay club are on a first-name basis.

The usual, please!

11.  People constantly mistake you for having a boyfriend because you and your gay friend are inseparable.

No, Grandma; I’m still single.

12. You know way more about Grindr than you ever wanted to.

That’s enough dick pics for a lifetime.

13. You know better than to ever use “GBF” to describe your friend.

Treating gay people as accessories is so tacky.

14. Pride is your favorite day of the year.

SO MANY RAINBOWS!

15. You know better than to ever bring up the dreaded Madonna vs. Lady Gaga debate when around gay friends, lest you want blood to be shed.

Can’t we all just agree that Beyoncé reigns supreme?

Anything we missed? Comment below, fruit flies, and show us what it means to be a true friend and supporter of our LGBTQ+ besties!


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