In today’s day and age, a simple conversation over text can be the end-all-be-all of a relationship. How crazy is that? Whether you like texting or not, it’s undeniable that it’s a main form of communication. So what happens when the guy you like won’t text back? We’ve talked to collegiettes with experience to let you in on some texting tricks that will have him typing back in no time.
1. Play hard to get
It’s a classic relationship rule: If you make yourself too attainable, the chase isn’t as fun. According to Courtney Martere, a senior at Marist College, playing hard to get has gotten her the most texts back. “Okay, maybe it's not super fun to do this, but I guess it's how the modern dating scene works,” she says. “Wait a little while to answer when he texts you…You may even try ignoring him as a test to see if he'd send that double text through, but it depends how hard you want to play the ‘hard to get’ game.” How long are you willing to wait before you text back? This game may not be for everyone, but if he plays it, so should you.
2. Send pictures/memes/emojis
A classic “what’s up?” text may not be enough nowadays. Ashley Drayton, a graduate of Georgia State University, suggests sending pictures or memes to keep him on his toes. “I would say my experience with this would be if you're having an interesting or funny conversation and he's intrigued, you send him cute/random pictures (of yourself too) or memes, and flirting with him always works,” she says.
Chelsea Jackson, a junior at Iowa State University, has similar advice. “I usually text using GIFs or memes, which tends to get guys to text back. And if they can't hold a full conversation using only meme, then they aren't worth my time.” Amen, sister!
Matt Milich, a senior at the University of Rhode Island, says emojis get him texting back. “If she sends emojis or like smiley faces, it usually means she’s into you.” Send him a GIF from a show you know he likes, a selfie of you at the pool or the heart eyes emoji. It’s hard not to respond to that.
Related: 11 Reasons Texting With Guys is the Worst
3. Ask questions
Conversations tend to die down when there’s nothing left to talk about (naturally). To avoid that, Courtney suggests to “leave the conversation open with questions or ask him for advice, so if he doesn't respond it's just plain rude.” We love this advice.
Dajin Kim, a sophomore of the University of Texas at Austin, agrees: “I usually ask questions to make sure they know I'm interested in what they're saying! Also, he's just rude if he leaves you hanging on a question, right? If it seems like he's answering very dryly to those then I would stop, but if he seems to be asking questions back and elaborating that's always a good sign.” Ask him what his plans are for the night or what he thinks of something going on—hopefully he’ll start firing questions back at you.
4. Play a game
It may bring you back to your sixth grade days, but playing a game over text can actually be a great way to get him responding and learn more about him. “Playing a game like 20 questions is the perfect way to make sure he texts back,” says Shelby*, a senior at Iona College. “It allows you to learn more about each other and heat things up a little bit, too.” If you hit a lull in the conversation, say something like, “Wanna play 20 questions? Ask me anything.” This will get his mind turning. You’ll definitely lose track of how many you’ve asked, but asking things like, “What’s your favorite sex position?” will have him going crazy.
5. Double text
Sometimes, guys need you to make it extremely obvious that you’re interested in them. And sometimes, people just forget to text back! If it’s been a while and your guy hasn’t responded, text him again. “If you have to go to drastic measures the ‘send multiple texts’ tactic works,” Ashley says. When he sees your name pop up again, you’ll be fresh in his mind.
“If they double text I'll feel bad, so I'll hit her back,” says Drew Dembek, a senior at James Madison University. Just don’t go overboard by sending back-to-back-to-back texts if he doesn’t reply.
Ah, the wonderful world of texting. If you’re finding that your texts aren’t getting replies, try some of these tips. Just remember not to take texting too seriously. Some people just don’t like or “aren’t good at it!” Best of luck, collegiettes!