The concept of Tinder is simple: swipe right if you think the suggested match is hot, swipe left if you think he isn't. In a set of very important unwritten Tinder rules, there are four parts to a guy’s profile that we examine before we swipe, creating these 17 deal-breakers that earn an immediate left swipe and send guys into the, “No, thank you” pile.
Part 1: Profile pictures
Since the entire theory of the app is a classic game of Hot or Not, profile pictures are do or die for every guy on Tinder. Not that we try to be picky, but if a guy has any of the following profile pictures, he’s just asking to be swiped left.
1. Group pictures
We don’t want to search for him in a picture of 26 people 500 feet away from the camera. If we can’t figure out which one he is, we're going to take precaution and assume he's the most unfortunate-looking one, giving him the left swipe just for making us do all that work.
2. All six of his pictures are with his cat
The first one was cute, but the last five freaked us out a little bit.
3. Bathroom selfies
C’mon. Left swipe by principle.
4. Pictures in the gym. Every. Single. Picture. In the gym.
Oh look, it’s him doing pull-ups, and another one of him doing push-ups. Is that him flexing in the mirror?
5. Pictures with bikini-clad girls
Providing undeniable proof that hot females are attracted to him, so, obviously, we too should be attracted to him by default. Classic move.
Part 2: Bio
If a guy has any of the death-trap profile pictures listed above, a quality bio may be his last hope before getting the left swipe. However, if his bio sounds like any of these, there’s no saving him.
6. “Just a good guy looking for a chance at love. Just get to know me.”
If it starts to sound like a stray puppy ad, we might have to nicely decline and wish him the best of luck in his pursuit of romance.
7. “This Tinder game is overrated.”
Okay, so then why exactly is he still using it…?
8. “Let me start by telling you a little bit about myself…”
...then he goes on in detail about his entire life, throwing in his favorite food and his blood type. This is a free dating app, not an autobiography.
9. “I’m as sexy as I am funny, so why wouldn’t you swipe right?”
Um, because your bio says that…
10. “Add me on Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Pinterest, Myspace and Foursquare.”
Anything else? Want to play a game of Words With Friends, too?
Part 3: Mutual friends
We're trying to avoid being matched with a cheater, our ex’s best friend or a distant cousin, so we always double-check the mutual friends. Sometimes mutual friends are good because they give us an open road to stalk via Facebook, but some mutual friends scream bad news.
Mom, extended aunts, uncles and cousins… there's a really good chance we could be heading for an inbred Tinder dating disaster. That’s when we realized where we recognized him from: his family’s Christmas card on our fridge.
His only mutual friend is your ex, and we really want to avoid the question of, “So, I see Ben is a mutual friend; how do you know him?”
13. Nothing but ladies
Every single one of his 56 mutual friends just happen to be all of our freakishly best-looking female Facebook friends.
Part 4: The messaging
The last determining factor is perhaps the easiest way to make us wish we had swiped left, or, even worse, make us want to actually unmatch ourselves from a guy: the messaging. All it takes is a few words to draw us in or send us running for the hills.
14. Asking for the phone number right away
We did just meet him and this is crazy, so he shouldn’t call us maybe because it’s way too soon for us to be handing out our numbers. This isn’t a Carly Rae Jepsen song.
15. Constant messaging
If we didn’t respond to his first three messages, there’s a really good chance we won’t respond the four that follow. He started sending weird vibes when he asked how we feel about hairy guys. There are plenty more Tinder fish in the sea, so he needs to swim on.
16. A revolting pick-up line
Does that really work for him? Does he really get girls with that line?
17. Looking for the golden ticket
No. Absolutely not. Way to go out on a limb there though, buddy!