We all realized long ago that Noah and Allie’s summer love from The Notebook might have been too good to be true. (Just kidding…we didn’t. But girls can dream, right?)
And although a summer romance does seem exciting and captivating, the reality is that sometimes (and by sometimes, we mean most of the time), boys cause more problems than they solve. And who wants problems over the summer?
Whether you’re taking a break from your relationship at school for the summer or just continuing your stint with the single life, here are a few reasons to embrace your summer of solitude and enjoy the sweet, simple, testosterone-free parts of life.
1. You’ll stress less
Summer is all about relaxing and de-stressing from the pressures of school. So why carry any stress into your vacation time? Boys equal stress. Whether you’re trying to decipher his ambiguous text messages, freaking out over what to wear to a movie date, or dealing with the pressure from your fling to do things physically, if your guy is causing more stress than he’s relieving with his movie-star smile, he’s not worth it, plain and simple. There will be plenty of guys waiting to stress you out when you get back to school in the fall–you can be sure of that.
And, if you absolutely can’t resist...
2. You’re free to have fun, flirty flings
Let’s set a few things straight: just because you’re not seriously dating anyone doesn’t mean you have to stay 100 percent clear of boys this summer! When you’re not tied down to one guy, you’re at liberty to have hot summer flings with whomever you want. If you keep an open, carefree mindset, you won’t prevent yourself from having fun.
Embrace your freedom and the fresh, go-with-the-flow vibe that accompanies summer. If an attractive boy comes your way, don’t be afraid to just go for it! Beach trips, fireworks, and ice cream cones are often better shared, whether it’s with one boy or two (or three). And even if you don’t want to hook up with people this summer, you’ll still have the freedom to dance and flirt with other guys, guilt-free.
3. You can take a technology detox
You shouldn’t be wasting away in front of a computer monitor when it’s beautiful and sunny out—same goes for a cell phone screen. Summer is the perfect time to go on a cleanse of the technology (not juice!) variety. With school on hold for three months, you no longer have to stay on top of emails from professors, club list-servs, or text message party invites. The same goes for the technology overload that always accompanies male interaction. Technology is a huge part of the college dating world, either in the form of constant texting, Facebook stalking his ex, or taking the daring step of following him on Instagram. Spend your well-deserved vacation on the beach, going on a hike with friends, or in your backyard with family—not texting him, waiting for him to text you, wondering why he didn’t text you back… you know the rest.
4. You’ll have more girl time
It can be really difficult to split time between your guy and your girl friends during the school year, but it becomes even harder at home over the summer when you have a lot of catching up to do with your high school friends. Everyone will also be on different schedules based on when they return from and leave for school, if they have summer jobs and internships, or if they’re traveling, so you’ll want to have as much time as possible to spend with all of them! Whether it be checking out the concert scene (Bey and Jay, 'nuff said) near you or just having a backyard barbecue, use your few summer weeks wisely to reconnect with the girls who mean a lot to you. You’ll realize how much you missed the people who know you so well, and they’ll only reinforce your confidence in the fact that you don’t need a guy to make you happy!
5. You’ll have more YOU time!
It’s hard to realize how much time boys can consume until you’re no longer dating one. This freedom will only get better during the summer months when classes, club meetings, and 12-page papers aren’t filling up your schedule. With all this free time, you’ll be surprised at how much you’ll get done and how great you’ll feel about it!
Madison, a student at Colgate University, is trying to make the most of her single summer and flexible schedule. “I’m interning and living in New York City with some friends this summer, and by the time we all get home from work around 6 p.m., we’re exhausted and excited to just have girl time,” she says. “It’s nice not having to worry about looking hot for my guy or planning dates when I’m really wiped from work.”
Madison says being single for the summer lets her do what she really wants to do. “I also love that since I’m not tied down by a boyfriend, I can plan awesome trips with my roommates to museums and shows that boys wouldn’t really want to go to,” she says. “I even have enough free time to take an Arabic language class on Thursdays and Fridays, which I’m really excited about.”
Don’t want to take a class? Try knocking some books (or movies) off your bucket list, finding a new running trail, learning a new skill, finally trying those awesome DIY projects you’ve pinned on Pinterest, or taking a road trip with your family. They miss you! You are more important than any summer fling will be, so take some time to focus on you.
Whether you’re packing in the activities and adventures or just taking time to breathe post-school, you should focus on what makes you happy this summer...whether that includes a guy or not is up to you!
Happy summer, collegiettes!