Peter Is Justified in Not Wanting to Propose at the End of 'The Bachelorette'

Believe it or not, there are only two weeks left of Rachel Lindsay’s season of The Bachelorette, and I’ve been patiently awaiting (what I assumed would be) her happily ever after with Peter Kraus. However, this week’s episode put an even greater spotlight on Peter’s ongoing reservations about getting engaged so quickly. While part of me has a theory about producers egging on his self-doubt, the other half saw a seriousness behind his fears that I admittedly glossed over throughout the season. After all, if your guy had a face like Peter’s, would your biggest concern be his slow play?

Before meeting Rachel’s family, Peter confessed to her that he was falling in love with her, which, as Rachel pointed out, is a huge deal for him to say. He’s in his early thirties, so he’s definitely been around the block and has learned not to toss around feelings that are meant to be a big deal—even if that’s what a TV show is nudging him to do. But remember Peter’s explanation for telling Rachel this: “I want you to have confidence in us and in me.” Like the Prince Charming he is, he wanted to build her up before he met the fam. Does that strike you as someone trying to avoid commitment?

So with his reserved and unsure edit in place, Peter later spoke to Rachel’s mom about his uncertainties. Our fave guy was straightforward and admitted that even though he may not be ready to propose, he wanted a relationship with Rachel. Mentioned countless times before, Peter believes in a marriage proposal signifying being together forever, and he didn’t want to lessen that idea by asking for the parents’ blessing when he may not propose.  

Sign me up for Rachel’s mom’s fan club because Kathy Lindsay seemed blown away by Peter’s honesty. I’d put money on Mama Lindsay loving him for getting that it isn’t natural to want to propose to someone so quickly. The last guy of Rachel’s she met was Nick Viall, who has relied on Bachelor Nation a little too much for love. Peter must be a welcome breath of reality that totally restores Kathy’s faith in Rachel’s Bachelorette role.

Maybe he has an old soul’s maturity or is intimidated by the enormity of the show, but Peter is totally justified in not wanting to propose in the show’s finale. First and foremost, The Bachelorette is entertainment, but in the end, don’t we turn to TV to see true representations of ourselves and people we know in daily life? It’s normal to be scared about a fast-moving relationship and take your time getting to know your partner. Peter's definition of proposing is totally normal in the real world, but it's being treated as a huge deal-breaker in the context of the show. This is practically ancient history, but among the first 10 seasons of The Bachelor, six men chose to date their final picks over proposing to them. Funnily enough, there has always been a proposal on Bachelorette finales, but couples' success rates have varied. With this franchise, a guy getting down on one knee isn't a sign that a couple is meant to be, but Peter's determined to save that moment for an old-fashioned, once-in-a-lifetime proposal.

As someone who's never been involved in the world of reality TV (…yet), I admire Peter for being so true to himself and presenting a unique viewpoint for this show, and I’m not the only one.

He’s not a commitment-phobe (he picked out baby clothes!) but likely someone who’s terrified of the media attention these couples receive and how, more often than not, that attention contributes to a very public breakup. While I definitely feel less confident about Peter’s chances of winning Rachel’s heart, I don’t admire him any less. If anything, Rachel needs to distance herself from the unofficial rule that there has to be an engagement at the end of the season. Peter is a dose of normalcy (and, tbh, pure hotness) that this show could use more of in the future.