It’s cuffing season, so put your hands up single ladies, this article is for you! Some of us who belong to the single population get sick and tired of being on our own. But who says it has to be this way? Through a few simple steps you can learn to either thrive as a single person or put yourself out there in new ways that will have you well on your way to changing your Facebook relationship status.
1.Ask yourself why you’re single
To understand why you’re on a single streak, it’s best to identify why so you can take steps to move into a relationship if that’s what you want. Being single isn’t a bad thing, and this question isn’t to tear yourself down but rather to analyze where you are in your life and where you see yourself going.
Maybe you spend a lot of time by yourself or need some tips on how to let people knowyou’re into them. So whether you’ve just been working on yourself for the past few months, focusing on school or taking a break from guys, think about what the best steps are for moving into a relationship.
2. Don’t lower your standards
No matter how much you want to be in a relationship, make sure you never lower your standards. Now these shouldn’t be ridiculous like your future SO just has to have blue eyes and dark hair, though that’s great if it works out that way. Say it’s important that your future SO has goals and aspirations. Don’t settle for someone who has no idea what they plan on doing and aren’t even trying. Find out what’s important to you and don’t compromise.
3. Understand that it’s okay to be single
The longer you’re single, the more time you have to develop yourself to be an amazing person when you are in a relationship. And if you’re sad about being single, that’s plau too. Acknowledge and accept your feelings for what they are, but remember to look on the bright side when you’re ready.
4. Make yourself (more) awesome
Being single can be an opportunity to improve the current you. Take the time you might be spending in a relationship and devote it to making a cooler version of yourself. Go kayaking, learn to cook an amazing dish (for yourself) or volunteer at the local shelter. Find something that will help you reach your goals in the future and make you a more interesting person.
5. Immerse yourself in learning
Finding ways to engage in self-learning encourages you to enjoy developing yourself and loving who you are. Join a book club or learn how to teach Pilates all on your own. The confidence you’ll gain in having this new knowledge will attract others who will be relationship material.
6. Work on your other relationships
Investing in non-romantic relationships is essential to your mental health. Plan a girls’ night in with your squad or have a long phone call with one of your siblings. Reconnect with a friend you haven’t heard from in a while. Whether it’s growing in your faith or strengthening your friendships, recognizing that an SO is not the only source for human intimacy and closeness will help you be a mature individual and a better SO to someone else in the future.
Related: 5 Little Ways to Show You're Into Him
7. Go do things by yourself
One of the best things you can do as a single person is learn to be happy independently. Visit your favorite book or record store just to browse. Head to a coffee shop with only your own company. Try and find ways to relish being on your own doing what you love. If it’s the right moment, a fellow record collector might just get your number.
8. Force yourself to be social
This may be counterintuitive to the above suggestion. But having the ability to be comfortable both on your own and in social settings will help in starting a relationship. If you’re typically the grandma or awkward turtle of your friend group, ask one of your fun-loving, social friends if you can shadow them for a night out. If going out isn’t your thing, join a group or club to meet new people. The more people you engage with, the more likely you are to create a network that contains someone you’re compatible with.
9. Ask around
Ask your girl or guy friends if they know any people who are looking to date. They just might be willing to help you out. It could be that your friends have no idea you’re trying for a relationship and you just have to let them know. Your future SO could be a mutual friend away.
10. Step up your flirting skills
Still not sure how to flirt? Maybe the guy you like just doesn’t know you’re into him. It might be time to brush up and get some professional tips to get you past level zero in flirting.
11. Get online
Many girls are just not into online dating. And while it can have disastrous results, it can also be a new way to find your future SO. You may even find your true love.
12. Make the first move
I am a firm believer that at least once in every woman’s life, she should make the first move. If you see someone in class you think is just too cute to ignore, ask them to study and maybe text them later to see if they want to go out for coffee. Guys are often just waiting until a girl shows interest before they start pursuing a relationship.
In the end, you need to know that the right person will often come at the time you least expect it. All you can do is try not to freak out in between and be the most amazing single person possible.