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17 Signs Your Social Media Stalking Skills Are Next Level

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Do you ever wonder how word even got around before social media? Did women really go on dates without knowing what the guy looked like first? Were couples actually official if Facebook didn't say so? If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions, it’s a pretty safe bet you’ll recognize these 17 signs you're a certified social media stalker.

1. You know when your friend gets dumped before she does

Uh, have you checked Facebook lately?

2. Finding yourself eight photo albums deep in your ex’s best friend’s brother’s profile is a normal thing

Wow, how did I get here?

3. Work does not get done when Facebook is open

Finding out who Justin Bieber is dating is much more important than organic chemistry.

4. You can spot a subtweet from a mile away

Oh no she didn't.

5. You think people who don’t have a Facebook actually don't exist

Are you sure you're a real person?

6. You’ve committed the accidental double tap on someone’s photo from 52 weeks ago

I'm going to act like that did not just happen.

7. You always ask new guys for their full name so you can find them on Facebook

I can't decide if I like you until I see your high school photos from 10th grade.

8. You’ll let your friend know if her new boy is, in fact, single

Yeah, we'll just see about that.

9. You’ve memorized the LinkedIn profiles of the executives at your dream company

All about those connections.

10. You’ve been vicariously living through the social profiles of celebrities for years

Can I just be you, Adele?

11. You have to act like you don’t know your blind date’s life story even though you studied his accounts for two hours before the date

So your profile said you're from Canada?

12. The only way you ever know anyone’s birthday is through social media

Who actually uses a calendar anymore?

13. The day Snapchat took away the “Best Friends” feature was the worst day of your life

Why do bad things happen to good people?

14. You stalk every female IG user who dares to like your boyfriend’s pics

Who's this super pretty blonde girl that just liked your new pic?!

15. You think privacy settings shouldn't exist

Private accounts are a total buzz kill.

16. You’re always the first like on everything

Reliable likers are the best kind of people.

17. You consider social media stalking not as a hobby but more of a life skill

Seriously, put it on your resume.


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