Over the years, Demi Lovato has taught us several important lessons. In Camp Rock, she taught us to confront our fears head-on and to never be afraid of embracing our talents. In her single “Skyscraper,” she told us to persevere and stand tall even when we feel overwhelmed. With her latest single, Demi reminded us that there is absolutely nothing wrong with being confident, young women. While it might be easy to embrace our bold side when we are alone in our rooms jamming to “Confident,” it is definitely much more difficult to channel our inner pop star in everyday life.
College can sometimes get the best of us and leave us feeling uncertain of our own power. However, we have seven daily habits that will leave you feeling fearless and empowered every day.
1. Set a focus
Confident people have goals that keep them moving forward. They have a positive outlook on life, and they set mini milestones on the path toward their larger goals. At the beginning of the day, write down a goal that you would like to accomplish in a notebook or a planner. When the day is over, return to your goal and set a new one if you achieved it, or remind yourself to try to accomplish it again the next day. Setting goals and having a focus will help you to feel better about yourself and your accomplishments.
“I have a Lilly Pulitzer planner that I'm obsessed with,” says Iris Goldsztajn, a senior at University of California, Los Angeles. “Writing everything I need to do down is definitely super empowering, but I also do this silly thing where I write down every day something I did for my career. I think when you're working towards a goal and you look back over the past couple weeks and see how much you've accomplished, it's a really cool feeling! It definitely makes me feel more confident.”
2. Speak and think positively
Being confident means shying away from self-doubt and feelings of inferiority. Replace negative thoughts or speech with words that are encouraging. You can be your own worst enemy or best friend. Don’t waste time beating yourself down when you can be building yourself up.
"Most of us are completely unaware of the things we say and the words we use," says Julie Holmes, a New York City-based life coach. "Words can have a dramatic impact on how we feel. If you find yourself regularly using negative words to describe either yourself or your emotions, eliminate those words from your vocabulary for 30 days. Replace phrases like 'I'm having anxiety' with, 'I'm feeling a little off'. Your body will react and respond to the words you use."
3. Celebrate every success
Confident collegiettes take pride in their successes and the hard work that they put in along the way. However, they also have the ability to celebrate the success of others. Diminishing others’ success is a sign of low self-esteem. Don’t let a day pass without acknowledging someone else’s hard work—or your own.
4. Embrace failure
When you don’t do quite as well on an exam as you would have hoped or your professor doesn’t love that essay that you worked really hard on, it is easy to get upset and attempt to forget about the situation as soon as possible. When something doesn’t go as planned, it is difficult to try and view it as a learning experience. "Learn to laugh at yourself and not beat yourself up when things don't go as anticipated. Everything is a process. A learning experience," says Holmes. Confident people understand that sometimes failure is inevitable. They realize that they can gain something from failure if they utilize it as a learning experience instead of a roadblock.
“I used to get really down on myself when I would do something that resulted in failure, but now I try to see it from a more positive perspective,” says Kerry Moore, a sophomore at the University of South Carolina. “I make a list of how I can handle the situation the next time and it makes me feel slightly better about whatever happened.”
5. Look good, feel good
This one is along the lines of “fake it ’til you make it.” If you feel confident about your appearance, you're more likely to feel confident about yourself overall. There is nothing wrong with spending a little extra time on your appearance or your outfit if that is what gives you the extra confidence you need to feel on top of your game. "Take pride in how you look. Looks aren't everything, but we always feel better when we take care of ourselves. Take a little extra time and thought when preparing to present yourself to the world. It will make a difference," says Holmes.
“Wake up early and increase your confidence in the way that makes you feel the most comfortable,” says Valeria Alvarez, a freshman at Keiser University. “For example, in my case, I like to take that little extra time in the mornings to get ready, do my hair and wear some natural makeup that makes me look glowy and put-together. I do this because I have learned to own my style and feel more comfortable in presentations or any other situation when I feel good with myself! Whatever you like to do to feel confident, you should do it for yourself, not for others!”
6. Don’t let others sway you
It's important to listen to others and respect their opinions. However, if you believe in something, it's important that you do not allow your own opinion to be changed in order to conform to that of the group. Confident people know that it's healthy to say no. On a daily basis, make sure that you're standing firm in your beliefs.
7. Surround yourself with positivity
Whether it's people, posters or both, fill your days with positivity. It's difficult to avoid being an empowered collegiette when everything around you is telling you to do so. Your room, especially, should be a place that not only boosts your mood but also your confidence.
“Decorate your room with motivational quotes or pictures that instantly make you feel happy and confident,” says Valeria.
Confidence is beautiful—embrace it!
