There's A New Zodiac Sign That's Messing Up The Entire Calendar

Whether you're an avid follower of horoscopes, or whether you don't believe in the power of the stars (you're lying to yourself, btw), NASA has made an announcement that may have you seeing stars (pun intended). Back in January, NASA announced there there is in fact a thirteenth zodiac sign that has been ignored for thousands of years. And now, it turns out the entire calendar is CHANGING. Cue Internet-wide panic. 

Ophiuchus is the unlucky thirteenth sign that has been ignored by all for 3,000 years since it was first discovered—and ignored—by the Babylonians. They prefered to operate under a moon-based calendar that utilized the 12 star signs we know and love and tattoo all over our bodies. But even those 12 signs don't divide equally, sometimes spilling over into others. 

What we do know about Ophiuschuses (Ophiuschi?):

• born between November 29 and December 17
• sign is a man holding a snake, named Serpentarius
• peace-seeker
• thirst for knowledge
• may have secret enemies in your group of close friends (when did zodiac signs get so dark??)

Here's what the new Zodiac calendar looks like now:

Aries: April 18 – May 13

Taurus: May 13 – June 21

Gemini: June 21 – July 20

Cancer: July 20 – Aug 10

Leo: Aug 10 – Sept 16

Virgo: Sept 16 – Oct 30

Libra: Oct 30 – Nov 23

Scorpio: Nov 23 – Nov 29

Ophiuchus: Nov 29 – Dec 17

Sagittarius: Dec 17 – Jan 20

Capricorn: Jan 20 - Feb 16

Aquarius: Feb 16 – March 11

Pisces: March 11 – April 18

Obviously, people are v pissed.