They're the first person you want to call when you have good news, because, duh, you text 24/7! No we aren't talking about your mom or your significant other––we're talking about your best friend. Here's 15 signs you and your best friend are basically dating:

1. You talk everyday

If you two go without speaking for an entire day, something is obviously wrong. The stupid things you say turn into your greatest inside jokes. You guys successfully prove that it is possible to have three conversations simultaneously––across three different social media platforms.

2. You have one too many dinner dates

When you haven’t seen each other in a while (two days max?), or when you’re in one of your “I’m going to be single forever” moods, they are there to take you out for a night on the town. You Instagram pictures of the two of you holding hands––usually over wine and pizza––with a caption that reads “Night out with my soulmate”.

3. Your mom talks about them more than she talks about you

Whenever your phone starts ringing, your mom tells you to “tell *insert BFF’s name here* I say hi”. If she hasn’t seen them in a while, she never fails to ask how they are doing. When you’re out shopping, she points out all of the things your best friend would like. Honestly, they probably even text on the DL...

4. You comment on all of their photos

"Bae", "WCE", "Fire", "Beautiful", "How did I get so lucky?"––these are just a few of the things you'll definitely comment on your bestie's pic.

5. You get jealous over a new friend

As soon as they starting speaking highly of a new stranger, you get territorial. You sneak glances at their phone while they’re texting to make sure it isn’t this "new person". You creep on all of the new friend's social media accounts, and always pretend to forget their name.

6. They have a strange nickname on your phone

And they go far beyond the regular pets names of “boo”, “muffin”, and “honeybear”.

7. Good morning/Goodnight texts

You have a strange way of saying good morning and goodnight, but it is an essential part of your day.

8. 70 percent––or more––of your Tweets are you flaming them

The majority of your tweets are tweets making fun of them, replies to them, retweets of their tweets, or subtweets about them.

9. You talk about the future

You two envision the life you’ll have together––the loft downtown with a great view, the double dates, travelling the world, and the kids who will be best friends too.

10. You trust their opinion

Their advice is golden. Before you post a photo on instagram, they have to approve of it. You send them screenshots of text conservation and ask them what you should say. Should you do this to your hair? Should you buy these shoes or not? Your BFF will know.

11. You get each other

They know when something’s bother you even when you’re trying to hide it. You can both witness something strange, look at them, and know exactly what they’re thinking. You hate the same people for unexplained reasons.

12. You’re not afraid to yell at each other

The truth hurts, but you know you can always count on them to be honest with you when something needs to be said.

13. You text about nothing and everything

You tell them that the train you are currently on smells like hummus and feet. You text them freaking out moments before a job interview. You vent to them about the world’s corruption. If you've thought it, you've told them about it.

14. They are the first to know anything about you

When the person you like finally texts you, you text your best friend about it before you respond to your crush. You tell them about the embarrassing thing that happened to you moments ago. You provide them with a live commentary as you spend your evening on WebMD diagnosing yourself with a terminal disease.

15. You guys have a no-judgment zone

You embrace each other’s weirdness without question. You trust you best friend enough to send them your ugliest Snapchats. You can ask them questions that you’re afraid to ask anyone else. “Is the United Kingdom a country? If it’s a country, then what’s England? A state?????” 

Even if you're a perpetually single collegiette, with your BFF by your side, you're really not.

If you're anything like me, you both love and hate your hair. Some days it's your crowning glory, and others it's the bane of your existence. One thing is certain however—even on the best days it never seems to look as shiny and healthy as it could be... until now, for me. 

A few weeks ago, my hairstylist noticed that I had a lot of split ends and my hair was looking pretty damaged. She suggested that the water at my college may actually be drying out my hair, which is obviously something that I can't control, so I asked her for advice, and she recommended coconut oil. 

At first, I was hesitant: Over the years I have tried pretty much every fad beauty trend, be it in the name of fun, fashion (or science), and I honestly just didn't think that this would provide the shine and health to my hair that she claimed it would. However, I had some coconut oil lying around so I decided that it couldn't hurt.

Related: 10 Genius Ways to Use Coconut Oil

I was amazed.

The results were totally noticeable and the process was actually kind of fun! After I was finished with the treatment my hair looked shinier, thicker and actually felt healthier and softer. 

Since the secret is too good not to share, I've made you a step-by-step DIY guide for this easy, overnight coconut hair oil treatment. Give it a shot and be ready to experience your best hair ever!

1. Buy the (right) coconut oil 

Now, this step may seem like a no-brainer, but it's actually a very important one. According to my hairstylist, organic coconut oil is the only way to go. If you think about it, this makes perfect sense—to obtain the best results, you'll want to be using the best possible ingredients, and trust me, after spending almost a whole day with oil in your hair, you'll want only the best. The good news is that organic coconut oil is not expensive, and you'll get so much out of one bottle that you'll have tons of treatments done before you even have to think of buying another one. The brand that I use is a pretty common one called Spectrum, which you can buy at Walmart for less than $8 dollars. However, you should be able to find organic coconut oil at most grocery stores. I am a personal fan of the Trader Joe's coconut oil. Additionally, you can use coconut oil in recipes, as a moisturizer and as a makeup primer and makeup remover among a ton of other things, so your money will definitely not be wasted. 

2. Heat the oil 

The first step in applying the oil to your hair is heating it up. By far the easiest way to do this, particularly if you live in a dorm and don't have access to a stovetop, is to simply place the closed jar in a bowl or sink full of steaming hot water. Allow the jar to sit in the water for about 5 to 7 minutes until the jar itself is warm to the touch. After that, open the jar and see if it has liquefied (it should be the consistency of baby oil or olive oil). You only need a small amount of liquefied oil for this treatment, depending on the length and thickness of your hair. For reference, my hair is thick and hits slightly below my shoulders and I used about 1/2 a cup of oil. 

This is the coconut oil that I use, Organic Coconut Oil by Spectrum 

3. Prepare your hair

First, make sure that you hair is tangle-free and has been brushed; this will help the oil go on a lot easier. Additionally, your hair should be dry for this treatment, as it allows the oil to soak into your hair easier. It's easiest to do this in sections, so putting your hair half-up (if your hair is longer or thicker) is often the easiest way to go. However, this step is really up to your preference. 

Related: What to Eat to Beautify Your Hair, Skin & Nails

4. Apply the oil 

Here's the fun part: applying the coconut oil to your hair! Pour your liquefied coconut oil into a small cup or bowl and simply use your hands to apply it to all the sections of your hair from the root to the ends. This can get messy, so doing this over a sink is your best bet for an easy clean up. After your hair is completely covered in coconut oil, it should have the look of wet hair. The best step from here is to throw your hair up into a high bun to avoid the oil getting on your clothes and furniture. 

This is my partially liquefied coconut oil, ready for my hair! 

5. Keep it on overnight

At this point, you're almost done, and your next step is to simply leave the oil in your hair overnight (or for at least 5 to 6 hours; the longer the better). Lots of people will put a plastic shower cap (or even a plastic bag) over their bun to avoid a mess, but personally I found that the most comfortable solution for a good night's sleep is simply to put a towel down over my pillow. 

Here's my coconut oil bun! Ready for a good night's sleep...

6. Shampoo and cleanse

The next morning (or 5 to 6 hours later) your hair should be drier and less oily to the touch than it did when you first applied the oil. At this point, it is time to wash the oil out of your hair. The easiest way to do this is to jump in the shower and shampoo your hair from root to ends. The most important part of this step is to make sure that you shampoo your hair enough to remove all the oil; you don't want residue on your locks. Personally I shampooed my hair twice and did so very thoroughly. Depending on your hair thickness you may need to shampoo a third time, but two is probably enough for most hair types. After you've cleaned your hair completely, jump out of the shower and brush it through or let it dry as you normally would, whether this includes a blow dryer or not. As my hair air-dried, I noticed that it looked a lot shinier and felt so much softer than it usually did. 

My hair looked shinier and felt softer as it dried after I shampooed it the next day.

Related: 7 Braided 'Dos Perfect for Any Holiday Party

7. The final results! 

After allowing your hair to dry fully you can truly see the results of your treatment. Your hair should be shinier, smoother and feel softer and stronger than it did previously. This treatment can be done as often as once a week, and will definitely help to keep your hair healthy and lustrous. If you have a coconut allergy, this entire treatment can be done with olive oil. 

Here's my end result: look at that shine!

Give this treatment a try—and let us know how it works for you!

(Photos By: Olivia Katharine) 

You’re really proud of yourself; you’ve been eating healthy and working hard in the gym all week. Naturally, you expect to see results, so you hop on the scale. Rather than feeling a rush of excitement because your weight has gone down, you’re crushed to see that it actually stayed the same, or even increased. While it might be easy to feel discouraged and like you want to give up, you shouldn’t. Your scale should not dictate your life, and here’s why.

1. Muscle is more dense than fat

It’s a common misconception that muscle weighs more than fat. A pound of muscle weighs the same as a pound of fat. Muscle just takes up less space because it’s denser.  According to Matt Paley, co-founder and CEO of Share It Fitness, a person with higher ratio of muscle to fat is going to appear heavier than expected. “To really drive [this] point home, compare a 140-pound body with 10 percent body fat versus a 150 pound body with 30 percent body fat,” he says. “The difference is night and day.” Basically, your body weight derived from muscle isn’t the issue ­– the body weight that's derived from fat is what should be avoided.

Kelsea, a sophomore at Indiana University, learned about this difference throughout her weight-loss journey. Once she started eating clean and exercising regularly, she naturally began to lose weight. “I got to the point where I was happy with the pounds I had lost, but I wanted to become more toned so I started lifting,” she says. “I eventually ended up gaining ten pounds, but my arms had definition and abs were starting to form.” Despite Kelsea’s gain, she had lowered her body fat percentage and developed the muscle she wanted, proving that the scale is irrelevant.

2. Weight fluctuates a lot

Pinpointing your actual weight can be especially difficult due to natural fluctuations. “In the case where an individual loses 10+ pounds a week, a large proportion of this is likely water weight,” Paley says. “[It] can easily be put back on.” Otherwise, Paley says that a normal daily weight fluctuation is one to three pounds.

If you find your weight going back and forth, Paley suggests switching to a more steady approach. For example, try to aim for losing a pound or two per week. To do so, you’ll want to burn 3,500 calories (the amount in one pound of body fat) more than you take in each week. This can be done in a variety of ways, but your best bet is to eat clean (more fruits and vegetables, less processed and sugary foods) and try to exercise at least five or six times throughout the week. If you’re looking to gain muscle, Paley says that taking on two to four pounds a month is a pretty good progress to aim for. Any progress is good, though!

3. Chasing a certain weight can be unhealthy

As long you’re only focused on a smaller number, you’re never going to be satisfied. Eating healthy and exercising is great; however, when it turns into an unhealthy obsession, you’re only going to end up doing more harm then good. Amy*, a junior at the University of Central Florida, dealt with this type of obsession. “I started watching what I was eating and working out every other day when I was 16,” Amy says. “I absolutely loved seeing my weight go down every time I stepped on the scale, so I started working even harder. At one point, I was working out twice a day, every day, and eating an extremely small amount of calories. It took me a while to realize that I was running a race I’d never win.” Not only did she go back to a healthy lifestyle, but she also stopped weighing herself entirely and focused more on how she felt. 

With plenty of us going through exactly what Amy described, it’s important to remember that we need to take care of our bodies. Brooke Schantz, Registered Dietitian Nutritionist and CEO and Founder of Bitchin’ Nutrition says it best: “Your body is the only thing you have in your possession for your whole life, so nourish it first and foremost with foods that help to protect it. In turn, your body will get to the weight that is best for you.”

4. Just because you weigh less, doesn’t mean you’re healthy

Measuring your health solely by your weight is not the best thing to do. "Weighing less" in reality, means nothing – better determinants of your health include body composition and muscle-to-fat ratio. If you are hesitant to give up your scale, Paley recommends measuring your waist, resting heart rate, cardiovascular endurance or blood pressure instead to get a better idea of where your body is at. “The scale weight is absolutely meaningless when comparing two individuals,” he says.

Ali, a junior at Montana State University, learned this after comparing her body to her friends’ for years. “I’ve always been more muscular than my friends, and I hated it for the longest time, especially because I couldn’t share clothes with them,” she says. “It wasn’t until I got into powerlifting that I realized I liked my muscles. They definitely weren’t anything to be ashamed of because I worked hard to earn them.” We’re all built differently, and it’s about time we start accepting that!

5. It’s more important how you feel

If all stepping on the scale does is make you feel bad about yourself, there’s absolutely no reason to keep it around! Not only are there other methods to determine your health, but how you feel should take priority over a number. It's all about being confident about your body and feeling healthy, not what the scale says. 

At this point, you should be marching to your bathroom, picking up that scale and throwing it OUT!  It’s useless for a variety of reasons, but mostly because it only ends up ruining your progress when you feel discouraged after working hard. It’s important to remember that your body is going through changes, and the scale doesn’t accurately show them. Throw it out, burn it, run over it – whatever. Just get rid of it!  

Back in 2012, Wasser was just a 24-year-old woman trying to break into the modeling industry. One day, she came down with flu-like symptoms after using super-plus Kotex tampons. She got into bed to try and sleep it off, but things took a turn for the worst. No one had seen or heard from Wasser until days later, when a friend found her lying on her bedroom floor just minutes away from death. Before she knew it, she was waking up in a hospital bed. The first memory she has after waking up is of a doctor telling her mother that her right leg would have to be amputated.

During her interview with Vice back in June of this year, Wasser opens up about the hardships and extreme pain she went through post-amputation. "It took me a while to figure out if I was still worthy, if I was still pretty," Wasser admitted. "I wanted to kill myself when I got home," she adds. "I was this girl—and then all of a sudden I don't have a leg, I'm in a wheelchair, I have half a foot, I can't even walk to the bathroom. I'm in a bed, I can't move, and I felt like those four walls were my prison."

But, sure enough, the now 28-year-old is back on her feet and standing tall. We got to see a bright, cheerful smile from the model in Nordstrom’s holiday catalogue, as featured below.

She is seen in Nike gear, including in this close-up of her modeling Nike sneakers. 

Today, Wasser makes it her mission to educate women on the dangers of using tampons and just how harmful they can really be. Most women aren’t even aware of what TSS is, and she believes she can make a difference in this world one step at a time. She's advocating for the cause and using her experience as a lesson for every woman out there. She's changing people with her story, and we’re happy to see Wasser gaining back her confidence and doing what she loves, as she begins to model again. 

It's the best of both worlds—cookies and donuts have come together, and now you never have to choose between the two again! We've simplified this recipe from Studio DIY so that you can feel like a pro baker without all the added effort. 

What you'll need: 

• Betty Crocker gingerbread cookie mix
• 2 tablespoons of all-purpose flour 
• 1/4 cup of water
• 2 tablespoons of melted butter or margarine
• Classic white canned frosting
• Sprinkles
• Round cookie cutter

Step One: 

Preheat your oven to 375 degrees.

Mix gingerbread cookie mix, flour, water and melted butter in a medium size bowl. Stir until dough forms.

Step Two: 

Roll out the dough and cut large circles with your cookie cutter. Then, cut a smaller circle in the center of your large dough circles, resembling a donut. Keep re-rolling and cutting donuts out of your dough until you’ve used it all.

Step Three:

Bake 8 to 10 minutes or until edges are firm. Let your freshly-baked cookies cool for one minute after removing them from the oven. 

Step Four: 

Once the cookies have cooled, frost them with a butter knife. Feel free to frost with a piping bag if you want to be extremely precise. 

Dress up your donut-shaped gingerbread cookies with sprinkles, colored frosting or other edible decor.

If you like to DIY your holiday gifts, then you have to try this recipe. Your friends and family will LOVE your trendy take on classic gingerbread. These cookies also happen to make a great dessert for your next holiday get together. Happy baking, collegiettes!

New England is incredible for a number of reasons. Whether it’s our crazy number of amazing sports teams or the Dunkin’ Donuts you can find on pretty much every main street in Massachusetts, New Englanders have a lot to be proud of.

But the best time to be in New England is Christmastime. If you’re a New Englander, get ready to be excited about everything on this list. And if you’re not, get ready to be pretty jealous, because Christmas in New England is the absolute best.

1. You’ll (almost) always have a white Christmas.

And if you don’t have a white Christmas, you’ll probably have a white Thanksgiving or a white New Year!

2. You’ll likely see a reindeer, deer or moose in its natural habitat.

Rudolph, is that you?!

3. Santa’s Village is right in Jefferson, New Hampshire.

Bonus: It’s open during the summer, too. Christmas in July, anyone?

4. And the Trapp Family Lodge is in Vermont.

There’s nothing like watching The Sound of Music and then visiting the lodge all in the same day.

5. The Boston Common has a fabulous Christmas tree.

Get ready for a skate on the awesome Frog Pond.

6. You always have a great Pats season to go along with your festivities.

Not to mention it’s the start of a great Bs season.

7. New Hampshire has no sales tax, which helps all of us broke college students with our gift shopping.

When you’re getting gifts for your mom, dad, brother, sister, dog, aunt, uncle, grandmother, grandfather, little and roommate, every cent you save counts.

8. L.L. Bean is based out of New England, so you feel super festive and local while wearing the Bean Boots you got as a gift.

Not to mention they come in handy when you’re buried in several feet of snow.

9. You can pick out your Christmas tree right there on the tree farm. And when you find the perfect one, it’s like…

Some might call it rustic and quaint, but we New Englanders call it normal.

10. You have more options for holiday events than Santa has reindeer.

The Festival of Trees in Methuen, Massachusetts? Vintage Christmas in Portsmouth, New Hampshire? Country Christmas in Bethel, Maine? Between Santa and the perfectly Instagrammable scenery, the holidays in New England are top-notch.

11. The maple syrup you love on your Christmas-morning pancakes is real, fresh and so, so good.

After all, according to Buddy the Elf, syrup is one of the four main food groups.

12. The skiing isn’t too shabby, either.

With places like Mad River Glen in Waitsfield, Vermont, and Sunday River in Newry, Maine, both of which look like sets from a holiday movie, your post-finals-week ski trip will have a purely New England rustic air about it.

Between the natural beauty and the rustic traditions, New England is the place to be this Christmas season.

If you haven't completely fallen in love with Amy Schumer in 2015, you're just lying to yourself. The funny lady has done some truly amazing things this year that are so pro-women and empowering we can't help but become even more obsessed with her than we ever thought possible. We can't wait to see what she has in store for us next year (Trainwreck 2? Yes, please!)... but in the meantime, let us count the ways we love her:

1. The time she wrote an essay on self-confidence

This empowering essay is essentially a letter to every girl in her freshman year of college, in a new city and place, who feels like her self-worth is dependent on her body. She ends the essay: "I stand here and I am amazing, for you. Not because of you. I am not who I sleep with. I am not my weight. I am not my mother. I am myself. And I am all of you, and I thank you." Cut to us ugly-crying. 

2. Her SNL monologue

Because we all think that we're dating Bradley Cooper a little bit.

3. This amazing photoshoot for the 2016 Pirelli calendar

"Beautiful, strong, gross, thin, fat, pretty, ugly, sexy, disgusting, flawless, woman. Thank you Annie Leibovitz!" 

This beautiful photo makes us want to dance around in our underwear and wear that tight dress that we think we can't pull off! What a beautiful woman, embracing her killer bod! 

4. When she chilled with Gloria Steinem

Steinem, queen feminist icon and co-founder of Women's Media Center, hung out with Amy at the Ms. Foundation for Women Gala. 

5. When she stood up to end gun violence

After a shooting at a movie theater during Amy's film, Trainwreck, she partnered with her cousin, New York senator Chuck Schumer, to work on ending gun violence. 

6. When she joined Tina and Amy's squad

@Tina and Amy—how does one sign up to be a part of this badass squad?? 

7. When she was named one of Time Magazine's 100 most influential people

Tilda Swinton writes about her: "Amy's got your back. She's in your corner. She's an honesty bomb. And she's coming for you." 

8. Her Inside Amy Schumer "Last F*ckable Day" skit

The skit shows Tina Fey, Julia Louis-Dreyfuss, and Patricia Arquette having a picnic in honor of Louis-Dreyfuss'"last 'f*ckable day"—the day when "the media decides when you're not believably f*ckable anymore." Essentially, the skit details the double standards that the media has in determining women's sexuality versus men's. 

9. When she posed for this Star Wars-themed GQ photo shoot

She makes those Leia buns look fantastic. In this photo, she is clearly making sure that their Uber driver doesn't get lost in the galaxy. 

10. When she showed off her musical skills

Okay, we have a little crush on her—she's a stunner! 

What was your favorite Amy Schumer moment in 2015, collegiettes? 

While beauty oils are all the rage, nothing beats a tub of good old Vaseline ($4.27 at Walmart and available in any drugstore) when it comes to beating dryness. This miracle product—also known as petroleum jelly—works wonders on your skin, hair, nails and body, and it costs less than a grande Starbucks latte! Check out these 11 amazing ways to add Vaseline to your beauty routine, and soon all your friends will be asking about your miracle beauty product!

1. Prevent fake-tanning mishaps

Rub some Vaseline on your cuticles, elbows and knees just before fake tanning at home with a gel or mousse to avoid patchiness and uneven color seeping into the cracks in your skin. Continue moisturizing these areas after tanning to extend the life of your at-home color!

2. Soften your cuticles

Rub some petroleum jelly on your cuticles before painting your nails. This will soften the skin around your nails so you don’t have to worry about dry skin ruining your perfect mani. Plus, it will make it easier to push back your cuticles, revealing more of your natural nail while still protecting your nail beds.

3. Get the most out of your perfume

Dab some Vaseline on your wrists and neck before applying perfume to those areas. The petroleum jelly absorbs the scent better than your skin, and giving the fragrance a base to cling to will make the perfume last longer and stay fresh for hours.

4. Grow longer lashes

Dip a Q-tip in your pot of Vaseline and rub your fingers over it to remove any excess. Running the Q-tip along the base of your eyelashes, gently apply the Vaseline to the roots of your lashes every night before bed for longer, stronger lashes.

5. Tame unruly hair

Whether you’re trying to rock a sleek side part or your gym ponytail is looking a little cray, rub the tiniest amount of petroleum jelly between your fingers and pat down baby hairs, flyways and frizz before heading out the door. Just remember to use this trick as a final step after using heat-styling tools!

6. Lock in moisture

If you have super-dry skin, apply a small amount of Vaseline to moisturize your elbows, knees, hands and any other dry areas.

7. Remove makeup

Petroleum jelly can easily break down hard-to-remove makeup, so beauty guru Michelle Phan recommends using a dime-sized amount of Vaseline on a cotton pad to remove stubborn waterproof eye makeup. Simply close your eyes and gently massage the product into your eyelids and along the base of your lashes to loosen up tough makeup. Don’t forget to follow up with your normal facial cleansing routine to remove any residue from the makeup or Vaseline!

8. Exfoliate your lips

In a small bowl or even on the back of your hand, combine a dime-sized amount of Vaseline with a pea-sized pinch of granulated sugar until you’re left with a uniform mixture. Gently massage the exfoliant into your lips for about a minute, making sure to move in small, gentle circles. When you’re done, pat off the excess product with a face towel. Since exfoliants get rid of dead and dry skin, you will be left with soft, smooth lips, perfect for recreating Kylie Jenner’s famous pout!

9. Highlight your cheekbones

Take a pea-sized amount of Vaseline and rub it between your index fingers. Dab at the product along the tops of your cheekbones and smooth out with your finger for a quick and easy highlight that works on every skin tone. The key to not looking oily is to use only the tiniest amount of product and to keep it concentrated on your cheekbones. You can use this trick on no-makeup days to add a healthy glow or use it as a final step in your makeup routine for a flirty highlight.

10. Smoother feet

Place a walnut-sized dollop of Vaseline in your hands and apply it liberally to your feet before bed. Sleep in socks overnight for super-soft and nourished feet in the morning.

11. Protect your skin from hair dyes

If you color your hair at home, apply a thin layer of Vaseline to your hairline, the nape of your neck and around your ears before you start to create a barrier and prevent skin discoloration from the dye.

What are you waiting for, collegiettes? Start incorporating this miracle product into your beauty routine now and you’ll be amazed at how something as simple as petroleum jelly can become a multitasking miracle product!

Getting to know your new campus cutie can be an exciting experience in the beginning, from the cute texts that you exchange throughout the day to the hours that you spend on the phone late at night.

But there comes a time in almost every relationship when you both agree to give each other a little history lesson about who you’ve been with and how far along things got. Sometimes, opening up to people about our sexual history causes us to get a little uncomfortable and it can even cause some women to “edit” their numbers a little bit because they’re afraid of being judged. But, let us let you in on a (not-so-little) secret: Your number doesn’t actually matter and we’re ready to tell you why!

1. It doesn’t change who you are

Your number doesn’t change you nor does it define who you are. “I think every college woman has a right to have sex or not whenever it’s the right thing for her,” says Iris Goldsztajn, a junior at the University of California, Los Angeles. “There is no time when a number comes to define a person (except at the DMV) and the number of people you’ve slept with is so completely irrelevant to who you are.” In short, don’t feel as though you have to feel bad for being sexually empowered.

2. The past is the past

Stop putting so much emphasis on whom you’ve been with and whom your significant other has been with. The more important thing to focus on is the relationship that the two of you have now and how you both can maintain it. And to maintain the stability of your relationship would mean to leave the past in the past. “In any relationship, holding people accountable for what they have done in the past is not healthy for the relationship,” says relationship expert Kim Olver. “Relationships are better based on how people treat each other in the present relationship. If you want to know the past because you are attempting to use it to determine the future, the conversation would be better had about values. This will keep the conversation based in the present.” Focus on the future goals of your relationship with your SO rather than hanging their past over their head.

3. It’s your number and no one else's

Your number, your business. If you don’t feel comfortable letting people know your sexual history, then you shouldn’t feel obligated to. “The past is a place where little power lies since we cannot change it,” Olver says. “What two people did before getting involved with each other is no one’s business.” A number is personal and you and your partner both have every right to keep that information to yourselves.

Remember, your worth isn’t determined by your sexually adventurous nature. So don’t ever let anyone make you feel ashamed of your sexual experiences. Your number is irrelevant and the right person will see that someday.

They're the first person you want to call when you have good news, because, duh, you text 24/7! No we aren't talking about your mom or your significant other––we're talking about your best friend. Here's 15 signs you and your best friend are basically dating:

1. You talk everyday

If you two go without speaking for an entire day, something is obviously wrong. The stupid things you say turn into your greatest inside jokes. You guys successfully prove that it is possible to have three conversations simultaneously––across three different social media platforms.

2. You have one too many dinner dates

When you haven’t seen each other in a while (two days max?), or when you’re in one of your “I’m going to be single forever” moods, they are there to take you out for a night on the town. You Instagram pictures of the two of you holding hands––usually over wine and pizza––with a caption that reads “Night out with my soulmate”.

3. Your mom talks about them more than she talks about you

Whenever your phone starts ringing, your mom tells you to “tell *insert BFF’s name here* I say hi”. If she hasn’t seen them in a while, she never fails to ask how they are doing. When you’re out shopping, she points out all of the things your best friend would like. Honestly, they probably even text on the DL...

4. You comment on all of their photos

"Bae", "WCE", "Fire", "Beautiful", "How did I get so lucky?"––these are just a few of the things you'll definitely comment on your bestie's pic.

5. You get jealous over a new friend

As soon as they starting speaking highly of a new stranger, you get territorial. You sneak glances at their phone while they’re texting to make sure it isn’t this "new person". You creep on all of the new friend's social media accounts, and always pretend to forget their name.

6. They have a strange nickname on your phone

And they go far beyond the regular pets names of “boo”, “muffin”, and “honeybear”.

7. Good morning/Goodnight texts

You have a strange way of saying good morning and goodnight, but it is an essential part of your day.

8. 70 percent––or more––of your Tweets are you flaming them

The majority of your tweets are tweets making fun of them, replies to them, retweets of their tweets, or subtweets about them.

9. You talk about the future

You two envision the life you’ll have together––the loft downtown with a great view, the double dates, travelling the world, and the kids who will be best friends too.

10. You trust their opinion

Their advice is golden. Before you post a photo on instagram, they have to approve of it. You send them screenshots of text conservation and ask them what you should say. Should you do this to your hair? Should you buy these shoes or not? Your BFF will know.

11. You get each other

They know when something’s bother you even when you’re trying to hide it. You can both witness something strange, look at them, and know exactly what they’re thinking. You hate the same people for unexplained reasons.

12. You’re not afraid to yell at each other

The truth hurts, but you know you can always count on them to be honest with you when something needs to be said.

13. You text about nothing and everything

You tell them that the train you are currently on smells like hummus and feet. You text them freaking out moments before a job interview. You vent to them about the world’s corruption. If you've thought it, you've told them about it.

14. They are the first to know anything about you

When the person you like finally texts you, you text your best friend about it before you respond to your crush. You tell them about the embarrassing thing that happened to you moments ago. You provide them with a live commentary as you spend your evening on WebMD diagnosing yourself with a terminal disease.

15. You guys have a no-judgment zone

You embrace each other’s weirdness without question. You trust you best friend enough to send them your ugliest Snapchats. You can ask them questions that you’re afraid to ask anyone else. “Is the United Kingdom a country? If it’s a country, then what’s England? A state?????” 

Even if you're a perpetually single collegiette, with your BFF by your side, you're really not.

The holiday season is always one of cheer and sometimes tears (as you painstakingly wait for the cooking experts in your family to be done cooking!), but the notion of holiday get-togethers is always to have fun with family and friends—something that translates across the world, whether you're a collegiette or a celebrity. Now, usually living vicariously through our favorite celebrities in entertainment is a daily thing, whether following them on Instagram or impersonating their moves on the red carpet, but how about when they are doing the same regular things we might be doing, such as eating Christmas? Well, here is a list of some of our most famous celebs doing the normal Christmas activities that might just mirror your holidaze!

Do you want to build a snowman with Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris?

Beyonce sent a holiday card to an 8-year-old survivor.

The Kardashians party with Drake:

And... the Kardashian family gets even bigger.

Mariah Carey and her twins say hello to Santa.

Empire’s Hakeem gives back to Philly.

The Curry family stays as photogenic as ever.

The Beckhams show off their outdoorsy side.

JLo and Casper keep cozy.

Miley dropped a new record.

Jessie J gives a BIG smile for the camera:

Katy Perry shows us just how Christmas works.

Sam Smith receives the BEST GIFT OF ALL TIME.

Rihanna gives a holiday greeting:

Sarah Jessica Parker wins Christmas tree of the year award.

Christina Milian tells us her Christmas wish.

What do they (and you) have in store for New Year’s?

Nothing screams the holidays quite like a classic velvet outfit. There are plenty of ways you can ring in the New Year in velvet—whether you want a head-to-toe velvet get-up or just a hint of it in your accessories. While styling this bold fabric can sometimes be challenging, here are 23 pieces that are both easy to style and will take your New Year's Eve outfit to the next level. 

1. Black Velvet Burnout Deep V-Back Dress ($44 at Express)

The velvet burnout pattern on this dress gives this otherwise classic LBD a major upgrade! The flowy sleeves and loose-fitting cut of this dress will allow you to dance (and eat) the night away without feeling constricted in a tight dress. Complete it with some statement shoes and you have an outfit to remember! 

2. Farah Velvet Wide Leg Palazzo Trousers ($16 at Boohoo) 

These gorgeous velvet palazzo pants are sure to make your outfit stand out amongst a sea of classic dresses. Pairing these pants with an edgy crop top or tucking in a figure-hugging shirt will show off your curves, while the vibrant red hue of these pants will make sure the holiday spirit continues well into the New Year. 

3. Vicious Velvet Gloves ($15 at Dolls Kill) 

Spice up your outfit with these show-stopping long velvet gloves. Pairing this with any basic dress is guaranteed to take your outfit to the next level. Plus the retro vibes these gloves give off are sure to make you feel like you're at a Gatsby party, no matter how simple your New Year's plans may be. 

4. Velveteen Leggings ($7.90 at Forever 21)

If you like to keep your outfits comfy and casual, consider opting for some velvet leggings. It will give your outfit dimension and the luxuriousness of the material will make your look ten times dressier than basic black leggings would—all without having to sacrifice your comfort! 

5. Black Velvet Sheer Sleeve Panel Flounce Hem Plus Size Dress ($41.99 at Choies) 

This is another outfit option that puts comfort first! It basically combines your favorite T-shirt dress with the elegance of festive velvet, all to give you your new favorite LBD. Throw on some heels and statement earrings and you'll look like you spent ages putting your outfit together, when it actually only took a couple of minutes. 

6. Black Velvet Burnour Yoke Blouse ($34.95 at Express)

This shirt is great if you're not 100 percent sold on the velvet trend yet. Pair this with some black jeans and killer wedges for a more casual look, or a black skirt and statement jewels for a bolder outfit. The versatility of this piece means you'll be wearing it well after the New Year's Eve celebrations have ended. 

7. Velvet Mid-Length Pencil Skirt ($42 at American Apparel) 

If you want something a bit more polished and put-together, opt for a velvet pencil skirt. You can pair it with a matching top for a trendy two-piece look or go with a bold crop top and blazer for something a bit different. Plus, this piece will also be great for your internship once spring semester starts. 

8. ASOS Hold the Dream Wedges ($31.50 at ASOS) 

These shoes are a great way to incorporate velvet into your outfit without having to commit to a head-to-toe look. Whatever your pair them with—jeans, skirt, dress—you will definitely be getting some compliments on the big night! Not to mention, wedges are pretty comfortable so you can dance the whole night away pain-free. 

9. ASOS Velvet Shorts with Lace Hem ($28 at ASOS)  

Want an outfit that's a bit more sporty? Then try out a pair of velvet shorts. It's easy as pairing them with a loose fitting cami or strappy crop top along with some killer heels—then you've got an effortless yet fashionable outfit. If you're worried you'll be too cold, consider layering tights underneath or wearing some knee high boots for extra warmth. 

10. Velvet Romper ($48 at Lux Clothing)

This gorgeous boho-inspired romper will help you unleash your inner Vanessa Hudgens. The warm colors means this piece is great for fall and winter, but the floral pattern also means you can work it in the hotter months. You can also pair this piece with tights or knee-high boots to get some more coverage if you know it's going to be cold out. 

11. Velvet Turban Hat ($29 at Urban Outfitters) 

If you're wanting to step out of your comfort zone with your New Year's Eve outfit, think about putting a hat on it. This gorgeous velvet turban hat has an amazing vintage vibe to it and is sure to be a great conversation piece. Plus, you also won't have to worry about your hair as you tear it up on the dance floor. 

12. Sasha Bardot Velvet Peplum Top ($12 at Boohoo) 

This velvet peplum top is sexy, without having to show too much skin. The gorgeous red of the velvet is perfect for the holiday season, while the off-the-shoulder detailing and flattering peplum shape will make you look (and feel) your best. Pair with some skin-tight jeans or a flattering skirt to show off your legs!

13. Velvet Burnout Skinny Fringed Scarf ($14.95 at Express) 

Skinny scarves are quickly becoming one of the biggest trends of the winter season. Adding this velvet scarf to an otherwise plain outfit will amp up the festive factor while keeping you cozy. Plus, this is a piece that you can definitely wear regularly even after New Year's Eve is over. 

14. Daisee Double Split Crushed Velvet Maxi ($12 at Boohoo) 

Show off your legs in this show-stopping maxi skirt. The rich red color gives this piece a luxurious feel, while the large slits work to give off a sexy edge and plenty of leg room for when you want to dance. You can wear a crop top for a more sultry look or go for a long-sleeve, mock turtle neck for a more conservative feel. Just don't forget to add some killer heels! 

15. Lace Up Velvet Mini Dress ($48 at Lux Clothing) 

The lace-up trend has been everywhere this year, so keep this trend alive with this velvet mini dress. Don't be afraid to flaunt your assets with this figure-hugging dress. If you're worried this will show a little too much skin, try wearing the dress with some tights or wearing a lacy bralette underneath. Finish it with some statement bangles or rings! 

16. Velveteen Mock Neck Top ($12.90 at Forever 21) 

A classic crop top is a great way to add some velvet to your outfit. You can wear crop tops with virtually anything—skater skirts, high rise jeans, leggings! This top will definitely be a staple piece in your wardrobe that can allow you to ace the velvet trend even after the New Years Eve festivities wrap up. 

17. Velvet Twist Scarf ($14 at American Apparel) 

Channel your inner Blair Waldorf and wear some velvet in your hair. This adorable bow headband will add a girly touch to your outfit and can also help fix a bad hair day (although, fingers crossed that won't be the case). Whether you wear your hair up or down, it doesn't matter—this headband will look fabulous either way! 

18. Jonathan Aston Triumph Velvet Hold Up Tights ($13.50 at ASOS) 

This is a great option if you're not totally comfortable with rocking velvet yet. The unexpected lace detailing can give your outfit that extra oomph and will make you look like a street style star. Plus, tights are a must-have to keep you warm from the cold winter weather. Make sure your shoes are as amazing as these tights! 

19. Black as Night Velour Romper ($18 at Tobi) 

This gorgeous piece gives the allusion of a dress, with the comfort of a romper! The plunging neckline is sure to make heads turn and make you the Belle of the Ball. Pair this piece with a delicate belt to highlight your waist and some enviable gold jewelry to compliment the rich color of the fabric.  

20. Velveteen Damask Pattern Kimono ($35.90 at Forever 21) 

Thought kimonos were out of style? Think again! Revive this favorite trend with a loose velvet kimono. You can bring out your inner rock star by layering this piece with a basic dress or some high-rise pants underneath. Finish off with some chunky booties for the ultimate edgy outfit so that you can ring in the New Year in style. 

21. Velvet Sequin Embellished Cami ($19.95 at Express) 

This is another great velvet piece that you can rock long after New Year's Eve has ended. You can play-up this tank with your favorite leather jacket and a mini skirt, or keep it casual with some dark jeans and killer heels. The mix of gold and silver sequins also means you can have fun styling this look with different metallic accessories. 

22. ASOS Early Days Velvet Lace Up Ankle Boots ($34.50 at ASOS) 

Give your go-to black booties a break and opt for these funky red velvet booties. The eye-catching material of these shoes is sure to give everyone you meet serious shoe-envy. Wearing a pop of color on your feet is a great way to amp up a basic black ensemble or to match the festive colors of a printed dress. Either way, your shoe game is going to be stronger than ever! 

23. Reclaimed Vintage Mini Body-Conscious Skirt in Velvet ($16 at ASOS) 

A lot of velvet pieces come in fun, interesting patterns like this skirt option! You can pair it with the matching crop top for a fun two-piece look, or go with a basic colored top for a more classic look. The best thing is, you can totally wear this piece in your everyday life by pairing it with basics like a leather jacket or oversized sweater. 

You'll definitely be turning heads in any of these enviable velvet options. The main thing is to make sure you feel confident and comfortable in your outfit—that is the key to any successful look! Now, all you have to do is choose what piece you'll be rocking this New Year's Eve! Enjoy your celebrations, collegiettes! 

2015 has been a year filled with incredible pop music and as the year comes to end, what better way to relive it than with a 5 minute long mashup that fuses them all together? Yes, we're serious. DJ Earworm has created a mashup titled "50 Shades of Pop," which features 50 pop songs that dominated American music charts this year.  

Throwing together 50 songs from various artists might seem like an impossible task to achieve in 5 minutes, but somehow DJ Earworm has succeeded. In fact, he's been developing mashups since 2007 (side note: why didn't we know about these brilliant mashups sooner?!?). This one features plenty of music's most popular musicians, including Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber, The Weeknd, Adele, Maroon 5, One Direction Ariana Grande, Ed Sheeran, Drake and Bruno Mars. Despite the varying musical styles from these artists (and many others), DJ Earworm seamlessly combines them all into a must-hear. BRB while we keep this mashup on a loop and reminisce on how amazing 2015 has been.

Juggling being friendly while keeping your relationships professional at work can be difficult. You want to get to know your coworkers—and you might have some that become genuine friends—but when you’re at the office (or anytime you’re with colleagues, especially a superior!), there’s a line that can’t be crossed. Friendly conversation may be okay, but here are 11 topics you should never discuss in the office.

1. Gossip

It’s true—if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all! Spreading gossip around your workplace is not only harmful to relationships between you and your coworkers, but also to the work environment as a whole.

“I may think all that in my head, but it's definitely not appropriate for work to say them out loud,” says Emily, a junior at St. Bonaventure University. To get out of this situation, Emily says it’s best to leave the conversation and pretend to be busy doing something else. “It's unhealthy in a work environment to gossip about fellow coworkers or anyone in a position of authority.”

2. Your coworker crush

Discussing who you find attractive with either your male or female coworkers may seem like a good idea at the time (especially if you’re hoping word will get around to your crush), but in the end, it will just come back to bite you or make things awkward with you and your crush at work—especially if you work at a company where inter-office relationships are a no-no.

3. Your personal problems

No matter how interested your coworkers may seem, they don’t want to hear about your family drama or how strange your boyfriend has been acting lately. Just don’t do it.

4. Hooking up

“Talking about hook-ups makes everything awkward,” says Maddy*, a freshman at American University. “A coworker once casually told me she wanted to hook up with a guy who happened to be a good friend of mine. She didn’t know I knew him, but after that I was uncomfortable.”

Even if nobody knows the guy you took home last weekend, your personal life should stay that way—personal.

5. Politics and religion

"To maintain a professional relationship, I think discussing sensitive subjects, like religion and politics could be avoided when holding discussions with coworkers,” says Sorany, a student at the University of Florida.

There’s a certain time and place to discuss politics and religion, and it’s not at work. Things get heated, assumptions are made, and it’s not pretty for anyone.

6. Quitting

Whether you already have plans to move on to something bigger and better, or you realize the job you’re in isn’t the right one for you, there’s no reason to discuss quitting on the job. You might think the girl in the cube over makes for a good confidant, but even if you can trust her, word gets around the office and you might ruin relationships with other colleagues and even your boss. If you are putting in your notice? Your boss should hear it from you, first.

7. #CashMoney

You make minimum wage, the girl at the desk across from you makes $14 an hour. Talking about money with your fellow workers could turn professional relationships into rivalries, and someone could end up bitter about it, which is why it’s best to avoid talking about your earnings at work.

8. An attractive boss

Don’t talk about your boss with your co-workers—especially one that you consider to be attractive. It’s unprofessional, inappropriate, goes against all rules of office etiquette, and if it ever gets back to your boss, your relationship will become awkward—or you might even be terminated.

9. Other coworkers

“Definitely don't discuss other coworkers or people in the office,” says Amanda*, a senior at Hofstra University. “This never ends well and could end with trouble!” She says a girl from work was gossiping about some other colleagues while they were standing nearby, and it made everyone at the party uncomfortable. “Not sure if it's related, but the girl no longer works for the company.”

10. Negative opinions about a task

Has your boss assigned you something that you just aren’t interested in doing? Don’t complain about it to your peers. “No matter if you don't like it very much, there are such better ways to go about expressing your feelings towards an assignment,” says Katera, a Her Campus correspondent at Marquette University. “It's just inappropriate and unprofessional.”

Instead, turn it into a positive situation—sit down with your boss to evaluate the tasks you’ve been assigned, express your willingness to take on any job, and also reiterate what your interests are. Make sure it’s clear that you will get the work done no matter what it is, but your boss will also want to know what kind of work you are particularly eager to take on.

11. Being hungover

Talking about the rager you were at the night before and how much your head is pounding as a result is not going to fly. Even if you do have a hangover, it’s not something you should talk about with your coworkers. It’s not attractive or professional and makes you appear like you’re not ready to take your job seriously.

Knowing which topics are acceptable for work and which are NSFW is a part of moving up in the real world. You should absolutely get to know your coworkers and enjoy the time you spend with them in the office—just be sure to keep it appropriate and professional!

*Names have been changed.

It’s no secret that the superhero film industry is dominated by male actors. Chris Evans, Robert Downey Jr., Christian Bale and Chris Hemsworth are just a few actors who have graced the big screen with their popular superhero characters. While we absolutely adore these guys, we can’t help but be bothered by the fact that there is a seriously lacking number of female-driven superhero heroes. Yes, Catwoman and Elektra have been given the superhero film treatment, but that’s simply not enough. 

When DC Comics announced a Wonder Woman film starring Gal Gadot, we instantly rejoiced. Wonder Woman is arguably one of the most iconic female superheroes, and it’s about time that we started seeing more badass females in action. And as if we needed ANOTHER reason to call Chris Pine bae, he has just voiced his complete support of Gal taking on the lead role in a superhero film. In a recent interview, Chris (who will play Steve Trevor, Wonder Woman’s love interest) said, “I couldn’t be happier to be supporting Gal [Gadot] in what’s going to be the first female-driven superhero film.” Moreover, Chris seems to feel perfectly fine with taking a backseat role. “I think in the world today we’ve had plenty enough of male-driven everything,” he said. “It’s finally time to see how wonderful the world can be with beautiful, strong, intelligent women kicking some major ass.” We 100 percent agree with Chris. (Side note: Is he single?)

Scheduled to be released on June 23, 2017, we can only hope that Wonder Woman will pave the way for more female-led superhero films!

Contouring has been having a major moment in 2015—we've watched countless tutorials and attempted those cheekbone-accentuating looks ourselves. But what's even more important than how you do it is what you do it with, meaning you need the perfect products for your skin tone. So amidst all the reds, corals and pinks, how do you know which blush works best for you? Here's a guide to choosing the right blush for your skin tone.

1. Look at your lip color

Sometimes, basing your perfect shade of blush for your skin tone can come right from your chosen lip stick, stain or color that you wear on a regular basis. Makeup expert Elaine Offers used this method when suggesting actress Julianne Moore’s blush shade that would best match her skin tone—one based off her light pink lipstick.

2. Test blush on your hands

The dab is probably your best beauty tip when trying to find any makeup product that will possibly be put on your face. Applying a bit of the blushes that you want to try on your hand can give you the perfect insight as to how it will look on your face and whether it's too dark or too light for your skin tone.

3. Get to know your skin tone

Do you really know what your skin tone is? Makeup Geek recommends tips that can help individuals identify which group they belong to: Fair Skin, Medium Skin or Dark Skin.

4. Use shades that directly match your skin tone

Usually, the ultimate tip is the simplest—your best shade of blush is the shade that most resembles your natural skin tone. Therefore, if you fall into the fair skin category, Makeup.com suggests light pinks for your blush; medium skin should follow with the light pink scheme and peach; finally, the best matches for dark skin would be reds, oranges or browns.

5. Try a natural way of discovering your best blush

According to allwomenstalk.com, one can find their natural blush color after an intense workout, pinching their cheeks or even during an embarrassing moment (even though blush color is probably the last thing you're thinking about in that moment!) “as a guide to find what color is most natural and flattering for you.”

No matter what skin tone you have, know that blush is only just an enhancer of your natural beauty!

College is filled with some of your best memories... and also some of your worst! With your busy social calendar and deadline after deadline, it's hard to keep poised all the time. You will definitely to have a couple laughable, embarrassing college moments. Keep reading to see which moments are bound to happen to you (or already have)! 

1. Spilling coffee on yourself and having a stain on your shirt for the whole day.

My shirt is totally meant to look this way.   

2. When you get called out for sleeping in a 300-person lecture.

Nightmares from this will keep you up for weeks!

3. Having someone point out that you wore that same outfit yesterday.

Why are you watching what I wear so closely anyway?

4. Dropping your tray in the dining hall. 

This spaghetti better not leave a stain!

5. Asking a question and realizing the answer is on the syllabus. 

Don’t worry- everyone does this at least once.

6. Letting your team down at flip cup. 

At least it’s an excuse to get more practice.

7. When your laptop randomly starts playing music while you’re in the library.

You’ll never forget to turn off the sound again.

8. Learning what you did last night while you were drunk out of your mind.

I said WHAT to him?!

9. When your phone starts ringing in class.

Hopefully you’re professor didn’t say anything sassy.

10. Sending an email to the entire class instead of one student. 

And then having to send another one saying “sorry for the spam”.

11. Walking into class late and everyone noticing.

Don’t pay attention to me, pay attention to the lecture!

12. When you forget your pencil so you have to take notes with a sharpie.

At least it will be very read-able.

13. Having that one squeaky chair in the library.

No one- not even you- can concentrate with this noise.  

14. Bringing all your plates from your room to the kitchen to wash them.

Don’t. Judge. Me.

15. Having to explain the meaning of the drunken text that you sent last night.

Make sure you say “sorry” at least ten time.

16. Having to sneeze in the quiet section of the library.

And of course everyone just has to stare at you.

17. Making awkward eye contact with that Tinder match you didn’t message back.

Where’s the nearest exit?!

18. Calling your professor the wrong name by accident.

Worse if you call them “mom” or “dad.”

19. When you have to tell last night's hook up you want them to leave.

I can walk you to the door if you can't find it! 

20. Walking into the wrong classroom when there’s a class going on.

And of course everyone notices when you try to sneak back out.  

21. Getting caught taking shameless selfies.

The lighting was so good I just had to! 

22. Being tagged in embarrassing photos from the party last night.

Let’s hope mom didn’t see!

213. Getting asked a question in class that you have no idea how to answer.

Maybe if you don’t respond, the professor will ask someone else.

No matter how embarrassing or awkward something might be, remember to keep your head held high! There's nothing that a bit of laughter and maybe some venting to the besties can't solve. Just remember how fabulous you are- always keep doing you! 

“I plan to get my first kiss when I’m thirteen.” A few years pass by. “Make that sixteen.”

“Or eighteen. Eighteen seems appropriate.”

“Twenty-one. This will be the year.”

Look at you. You’re a goal setter. You have it all: the opportunity to go to college, great friends, a job or club you’re passionate about...but there’s still something out there that you think you’re missing. Part of you wonders if it’s okay that you’ve never been kissed.

Yes, it’s a cultural norm to have your first kiss in your teenage years. And if you’ve passed your teenage years without that particular “first,” you may even feel out of place. Fretting about this single experience is pretty trivial in the long run, but when it is so widely promoted today, it’s hard to not think about sometimes. We’ve laid out some reasons for why you shouldn’t stress about not having had your first kiss yet.

It’s not as important as it may seem

People generally idealize a sense of completeness when they think about being in a relationship. The media, to a great extent, is responsible for the importance we place on romance. A lot of movies can create pressure on people who have never been kissed or been in a relationship (i.e. Barely Legal, a movie about three girls who decide to lose their virginities on a their eighteenth birthday). It puts relationships and “firsts” on a pedestal they don’t deserve.

Dr. Ramani Durvasula, author of the new book Should I Stay or Should I Go? (which challenges the myth of "love conquers all"), talked to us about the impact social pressures have on romantic relationships. “Sadly, the mythology of romance in our movies, TV, and stories is that perfect love ‘completes’ us,” she says. “We complete ourselves, and a partner is a complement—not a necessity.”

It’s easy to feel out of place when most of your friends talk about what movie they saw with their beau last night, what gifts he got her for her birthday last week or where they’re planning on going for Valentine’s Day. While everyone else is talking about their experiences over lunch, you’re the one who’s quietly pushing around food with your fork. Perhaps you really wish you had experiences to contribute to the discussion. Or you just really, really want to change the subject. There’s more to life, isn’t there?

You’re perfectly fine the way you are

Nonetheless, sometimes you feel peer pressure, and you know it. You’re not alone. You know societal norms have conditioned you to want something just so you don’t feel as out-of-place. You know there is more to life than relationships, yet you wonder how people can get together so easily and so often. You think you’re missing something. “Do I not do my hair well enough every morning?” “Do I not talk enough?” “Do I talk too much?” If you’re like some, you become especially self-conscious around people who are in relationships. While you shouldn’t feel self-conscious, others can make it excruciatingly hard to resist the feeling.

Related: 9 Thoughts We Have While Watching PDA 

Don’t listen to people who think you need to change

They may treat you as if you are helpless or even immature. When you admit that you haven’t been kissed, others may try to sympathize with you--as if it’s something to even show sympathy for! You know it and we know it; not having a first kiss is nothing to pity someone about. Too bad others just don’t understand.

People often have lame advice for you. If you had a dollar for every time you heard “You just need to socialize more” or “Why don’t you make the first move?” you’d be able to buy meals for all of your floormates. For a week. It all ends up being worthless advice. Why change yourself to please your friends? Why even consider changing yourself to uphold a value that society promotes?

There’s no rush

The best advice comes from those who can relate to you. When asked about her feelings about having never been kissed, Mackenzie Skinner, a junior at the University of Oklahoma, wowed us with her firm promotion of independence. She laughed and said, “Go read a book. There are gazillions of [boys] and one of them is bound to like you!”

Just give it time. Divya Velury, a sophomore from Washington University in St. Louis, is one of many who is happy to have never been in a relationship. “I'll have my first kiss when I'm good and ready, and if that's when I'm 20...25...30, so be it.”

People have a habit of planning out when they’re going to have their first kiss, fall in love, get married, etc. None of them have considered that falling in love is not something to plan, nor is it a destiny one will face when they reach a so-called “acceptable” age. “One should never fall in love on someone else's schedule,” Dr. Durvasula says.

But many of them will force themselves into romance for the sake of fitting in.

“If I had a dollar for every person who rushed into a relationship or a marriage because everyone else around them was in one, I would no longer need to do therapy and would retire,” says Dr. Durvasula.

We asked her about how happy an individual becomes when they think they fit into some sort of “relationship club.”

“When you are in a relationship and are in the ‘club,’ there can be a release and relaxation and joy that comes from fitting in and not feeling like you are fighting the current (even if the relationship is less than ideal).” Someone may claim to be happy in their relationship, but this happiness may not be attributed entirely to being in a romantic relationship. They may be happy because they feel they are more socially accepted.

It’s okay to think about it sometimes, but don’t let it consume your life. You’re in college with plenty of other cool things to pursue. Haleigh Skinner, a junior from the University of Oklahoma, has other priorities. “There is more to life than a relationship. Go see the world, explore, and have fun! If it's meant to be, it'll happen in time!”

Besides, a first kiss is probably not as magical as the media makes it seem. Give it time and don’t be hard on yourself because you feel a little different from your peers. Different is pretty fierce when accessorized with confidence.

College visits are an extremely important part of the college decision process. Often, visiting a campus can help you form an idea of what you are looking for in a college. Standard tours and sitting in on classes are pretty common, but there’s much more you can do while on a college tour.

We’ve talked to collegiettes and Judi Robinovitz, a certified educational planner and founder of Score At The Top, to let you in on the best things you should do during college visits. Don’t miss your chance to make the most of your on-campus visits—because trust us, you can always do more!

1. Stay overnight

Many colleges offer overnight visits, which can help you get to know the real feel of the campus. You can stay in a dorm, get to know other students applying and find out more about how the college works. If a school you’re applying to doesn’t offer overnight visits, reach out to a friend who goes there to see if they’ll let you crash for the night! Staying over allows you to process what you saw during the day, and it can help you decide whether or not the environment is for you.

“There are two ways to do overnight visits,” shares Robinovitz. “You can set one up on a personal level with a student you know or through the admissions office. Large state universities will likely turn you down, so you can do some networking to get in touch with a student.” Doing an overnight visit from a Saturday to Monday is ideal so you can see the social scene as well as the academic side of things.

Erin Crabtree, a senior at Belmont University says, “As an admissions representative, I have hosted multiple students who stayed with me in my dorm, hung out with my friends and went with me to classes. If you're unsure whether or not a college is right for you, this is a great way to get to know the campus and the community a bit better.”

Lauren Antonucci, a sophomore at the University of Rhode Island, did an overnight visit before committing to the school: “I did an overnight visit at the University of Rhode Island, and it was definitely the deciding factor that made me want to go there,” she shares. “Seeing the dorms and campus from a student’s perspective got me thinking how awesome it would be if I went there.” If you’re almost ready to commit to a school but want to be 100 percent sure, an overnight visit is a great tool to help you with that.

2. Shadow a student

Shadowing a student will show you what a day in the life of a student at a particular college is like. Walking tours can be tiring and overwhelming, especially after hearing a ton of information about so many different colleges. If you’re really considering the school, shadowing a student will help you feel out the campus, learn more about student life and even experience college classes. Most colleges offer this option, and it can be an awesome way to see if you see yourself attending said school. College websites have this information and it’s a simple online registration process!

“If the school doesn’t offer an overnight, shadowing a student is the next best thing,” Robinovitz says. “Remember that the student you’re shadowing likely works for the university, so it’s important to be positive, intellectually curious, ask questions and take notes during classes for an in-depth visit.”

Liz Sidaros, a sophomore at James Madison University, participated in the school’s shadowing program and had an awesome experience: “Shadowing a student with the Duke for a Day program was an awesome way to experience a JMU classroom environment. We all know the statistics and the average class size, but it was helpful to actually see firsthand.” What better way to see if the college is right for you than become a student there for 24 hours?

3. Attend a club meeting

Attending a club meeting is a great way to meet students with similar interests as you and see what the school has to offer. If you can participate, that’s even better!

“If you’re only visiting one university in a day, make arrangements with a club,” Robinovitz shares. “Cultural heritage groups (CCM, Hillel, Asian Students Union, etc.) tend to be amazingly welcoming.”

Brianna Susnak, a freshman at Indiana University, decided to check out her school’s newsroom since she knew she wanted to write for the newspaper. “I started talking to a girl [who] worked there and was involved with the newspaper, and we ended up becoming good friends,” she says. “I kept in touch with her after and she helped me through a lot of the decision process. Even now that I'm a freshman, we still talk, and I can still go to her with questions or for advice. Plus it's nice going into your freshman year with an upperclassman friend that has interests similar to yours.” Don’t be shy about getting involved—upperclassmen love showing newbies the ropes!

Club schedules can often be found online, or simply check out the posters around campus! If you contact the president or editor-in-chief, they’ll be happy to help you out.

4. Sit in on a class (more than once!)

If you live near the college you’re thinking about attending, you may be able to sit in on a class that interests you more than just once. If you don’t want to register (and pay) for the class, talk to the college or the professor to get permission to observe. Sitting in on a class for an extended period of time can help you see how you like it rather than simply sitting in on a class one time. Seeing the progression of the class will help you get a feel for if the dynamic is right for you.

If you want to audit a class, the first step would be contacting the professor. Classes and professors’ emails can be found online. If they give you the go-ahead, you’re pretty much set! Sitting in on a late afternoon or night class is a great way to experience a college without having to enroll in the school.

5. Talk to a student in your major

Talking to a student in the major you’re considering is a great way to find out more about how the program works at that specific school and see what opportunities lie ahead. Information sessions are helpful, but getting a student’s perspective is the best way to find out the truth. If you’re unsure what you want to major in, talk to a few students in different majors to see if something catches your attention.

“Talking to a student in the major you’re interested in is very helpful,” shares Robinovitz. “In addition to the information session and campus tour, talking to a student or professor in your area of interest is important.” You can set this up through the admissions office, a friend, Facebook or even Yik-Yak!

Brianna talked one-on-one with a student in her major and says, “I found it really cool to hear their perspective on classes [and] how they made their college decision, and it was a nice change from hearing from a bunch of adults/admissions officers.” Talking to a student in your major is a great way to learn how the program really operates, and whether that’s a good fit for you. If you contact the department you’re interested in, they can put you in touch with a student in no time!

If you’re unsure of what to talk to them about, ask about the best professors, requirements for that major, study abroad opportunities, or cool classes to take!

Whether you’re pretty sure you know what school you want to attend or are still narrowing it down, taking advantage of these options will help you get the most out of college visits. Finding out more about the student life, academics and activities will make your decision process much easier! The next time you’re going to book a college tour or sit in on a class, ask about one of these options for an even better experience. College visits should be enjoyable, so don’t stress—relax and have fun!

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