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Danny Castellano is Officially Too Anti-Feminist to Tolerate

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Remember when Danny Castellano was the ultimate stud? A huge upgrade on New Girl’s Nick Miller, he was curmudgeonly and gruff but had a heart of gold and the sweetest dance moves. In many ways, Danny is still that guy, but his recent exploits in The Mindy Project’s fourth season have got us all kinds of ticked off.

Flashback to the moment when Danny begged Mindy to meet him at the top of the Empire State Building, in a rom com dream only Mindy Kaling could think up. We knew of Danny’s troubled past relationships—particularly with his wife, Christina—and we weren’t too keen on how he treated Mindy after their steamy airplane makeout sesh turned short-lived coupling. Yet, we believed that Danny meant what he said and things would be real this time around. And for nearly a season-and-a-half, their romance was just as blissful as we hoped it would be.

But with the birth of little Leo Castellano (who, don’t get us wrong, is the most adorable baby we’ve ever seen) has come a whole lot of issues. We’ve admired Mindy since the show’s start for her gumption and career-driven mindset. Although she was a little boy-crazy, she never let her search for a man marginally deter her work goals.

But a lot has happened since then. Dr. L convinced Danny to propose, had Leo, started her own fertility clinic and went back to Schulman & Associates following Danny’s oddly timed and strangely lengthy departure to California to care for his sick dad. Somewhere in between all that plot, Mindy and Danny’s ideals of “having it all” might have strayed from one another a bit. Namely, Danny expects Mindy to stay at home with Leo…as in, halt every other aspect of her life, sacrifice everything she’s worked for and never voice her opinion on the matter.

It’s not that we don’t understand Danny’s desire for Mindy to play stay-at-home mom. It’s an obvious sore spot for him, brought on by the years in which his own Ma was working to keep their family afloat. But still, what Danny has demanded of Mindy in recent episodes is so not cool.

First, there was his attempt to impregnate her without her knowledge, thinking baby number two would force Mindy to put her career on hold. Tracking her ovulation and getting her drunk while on a romantic carriage ride, knowing that she’d give it up regardless of a lack of protection—that was just his first offense.

After many arguments about Mindy’s motherly responsibilities and Danny’s decision to delay their wedding, Mindy was left to heartbreakingly ponder whether Leo’s crib would fit in her old apartment. That’s right—she’s thinking of breaking things off and moving out.

And we can’t say we blame her. After all, Mindy and Danny used to be #relationshipgoals. But all these anti-feminist antics that Danny’s been pulling are out of line. We know he’s traditional but attempting to shame Mindy into submission is beyond cruel. We certainly don’t want to see this once amazing TV couple split, but it’s high time that Danny understands—it’s Mindy’s prerogative whether she wants to continue her career or not. The guilt trips, the unrelenting attacks to Mindy’s character and the boozy carriage rides stop here.

We’re not sure when you became such an anti-feminist, holier-than-thou jerk, Danny, but we’re so done crushing on you until you’ve made a major change.


What the Disney Princesses Would be Like in College

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Disney princesses might not fare so well in college. With dorms instead of elegant castles and rowdy frat boys instead of Prince Charming, it's hard to imagine them enjoying the experience very much. College is the land of textbooks, beer pong and crazy roommates—not fairy godmothers, magic carpets and happily ever afters. But if the Disney princesses could tough it out on campus, we think it would be pretty funny. Here's how we imagine Snow White, Cinderella and the rest of the girls holding up as college students.

Snow White: The Fraternity Sweetheart

“I don't hang out with girls. I just can't handle the drama. I get along with guys soooo much better.” Sound familiar? That's Snow White. She spends most of her time hanging out at a frat house with her seven best guy friends. Unfortunately, all that socializing is taking a toll. She doesn't always have time to study—even though she's a nutrition major, she wound up with food poisoning recently when she bit into a bad apple.

Cinderella: The Girl Next Door

Cindy's roommates never do quite their fair share of the cleaning, so she's usually stuck doing dishes and taking out the trash for everyone. On top of her extra cleaning duties, Cinderella also works hard in school (she's a veterinary science major—she’s always loved animals, like mice!) and juggles a work-study job to cope with those impending student loans. Style isn't her number one priority in her day-to-day life, so she shocked everyone at spring formal when she looked red carpet-worthy sporting a gorgeous dress and flawless hair and makeup. A few too many drinks later, she left the formal with her heels in hand... and dropped one on the way out.

Belle: The Straight-A Student

Belle is a whip smart English major who makes the Dean's List every semester. She can typically be found with her nose buried deep into a book. All of her professors love her (she’s the one who actually goes to office hours every week). Belle used to be uninterested in dating; she kept pushing away guys who hit on her at parties. But then she met her current boyfriend—who could use a shave and a haircut, if we're going to be honest—and now she spends all her free time with him and his pet fish, Lumiere and Cogsworth, in his off-campus apartment.

Ariel: The Girl Who Studied Abroad (and Won’t Shut Up About It)

Ariel is that girl who can't stop talking about how ah-may-zing her study abroad experience was. She's constantly texting that hot guy she met abroad, Eric, and insists the seaweed really is greener over there. Now that Ariel is back from her trip, she declared a music major and sings in an a cappella group on campus. She also loves to max out Daddy's credit card on gadgets and gizmos at the mall and dedicates hours at the gym to work on her tail.

Aurora: The Slacker

Aurora comes from a wealthy family. Her grandfather donated the building that holds all her classes... but Aurora can't help but sleep through all of them. She'll probably declare a communications major, but hasn't gotten around to filling out the paperwork yet. She's constantly curled up in her dark, single dorm room. On the rare occasion that she does roll out of bed and leave her room, she has a feud going with a not-so-nice girl in her sorority, Maleficent. The one thing Aurora has going for her? Long, thick, shiny, blond hair. No wonder Maleficent is jealous!

Mulan: The Feminist

Mulan is a gender and sexuality studies major and is active in a number of feminist groups on campus. She chose not to rush any sororities. Her favorite holiday is Halloween because she loves to dress up in costume—and she pulls it off well, too! But aside from her classes, extracurriculars, and social life, family is Mulan's number one priority. She grew up not too far from campus and heads home on the weekends to spend time with her parents and grandparents.

Jasmine: The Wild Child

Jasmine is feisty! Back in high school, she used to ditch her helicopter parents and run away from time to time. Now that she's in college, she loves to date boys her parents don't fully approve of, like her current boyfriend, Aladdin. But Jasmine isn't a total bad girl, though—she has a good heart and is simply embracing her new, independent life in college. She’s always wanted to get out of her hometown, so she decided to major in international studies. When she isn't testing the limits of her newfound freedom, she's working on her killer abs at the gym. She loves to flaunt her toned stomach in trendy crop tops.

Pocahontas: The Outdoorsy One

Pocahontas, an environmental studies major, loves to spend time outside. You can usually find her relaxing in a grassy spot on the quad or hiking with a group of friends. She's a vegan, which means the dining hall can be tricky for her. Instead, she whips up creative, veggie-friendly meals in her dorm kitchen. Pocahontas isn't very religious, but she considers herself spiritual and likes to read about topics like reincarnation (if only she could bring back her grandmother!) and meditation.

Rapunzel: The Sorority Sister

As an only child with ultra-protective parents, Rapunzel often felt like she was locked alone in her room throughout high school. So when she got to college, her number one priority was to join a sorority and make lots of friends. When it came time for her sorority to pick a charitable organization, Rapunzel chose Locks of Love. She chopped her long, glamorous hair into a shoulder-length cut and convinced all her sisters to do the same! Rapunzel is a chemistry major; her dream is to create the ultimate migraine medicine. Back when her hair was long, she got killer headaches from all the weight!

Do you recognize any of these princesses on your college campus?

Scott Disick is the WORST in Chris Brown's New Music Video

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We're not sure what Chris Brown was trying to achieve in his new video for "Picture Me Rollin'" but it's pretty cringe-worthy to say the least. The video opens to a scene in which Brown is getting into a heated argument with a woman in his car—which feels extremely inappropriate given what it seems to be referencing. Not that we were expecting it to, but it doesn't get any better from there. The scene jumps to Disick, who calls Brown to invite him to a party. What's really unnecessary is Disick's distasteful behavior.

"Hey, it's understandable on the fucking Porsche, but off the Lambo, bitch, come on!" Disick screams at a few scantily-clad girls around him. Really? That's insensitive on so many levels.

Other gems from the video include, "Chris, yo, you gotta come over here. I can't fuck all these bitches without you," and "Come on, what's bracking man, come on! What's bracking? Right? Is that right?" Scott Disick utters (or more appropriately, shrieks) the last phrase as he rushes to defend Brown after a guy shuts off the power on their party.

In general, Scott Disick's cameo makes him out to be loud, rude, and sort of an all around jerk. Sorry, but we don't think Kourtney is going to be impressed by this latest show of macho posturing. Check out the full video below, but be warned—it's bad.

 

The First Teaser for 'Fuller House' Will Have You Sobbing

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Whether you were a Full House fanatic when the show was still running or you caught the re-runs on ABC Family or Nick at Nite, you will not be able to un-catch the feels you will surely catch after watching the teaser for the Netflix original series, Fuller House. The Full House spin-off, set to be released on February 26th, is centered on DJ and Stephanie Tanner moving back into their childhood home to raise DJ's three boys. The house wouldn't be complete without DJ's best friend and everyone's favorite neighbor, Kimmy Gibbler, so, naturally, she's moving in too.

It's all coming full circle. From Danny, Jesse and Joey raising three little girls to DJ, Steph and Kimmy doing the same with three little boys. Do you have tears streaming down your face yet?

In the teaser we see that the house in San Francisco is exactly as we remembered it. The same living room set, the same kitchen table... sweet, sweet nostalgia! Miranda Lambert's The House That Built Me is playing in the background as we see the only thing that has changed about the house: a new and incredibly adorable Golden Retriever puppy! (Don't worry, Comet, you'll always be first in our hearts.)

As if the song, the puppy and the flashbacks of our favorite home away from home weren't enough to bring on a full case of the feels, we're given the ultimate tease when we hear the voices of the original Full House cast outside the front door. We've got Danny, Jesse, Joey and...Aunt Becky, is that you? Just about everyone from the original show is accounted for and by this point in the minute long teaser, everyone watching is surely in a pool of their own tears.

Aside from Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, everyone from the original cast of Full House has confirmed that they will be reprising their roles, even Jesse and Becky's twins, Nicky and Alex, and DJ's old boyfriend Steve. Have mercy!

Is it February 26th yet?

8 Things to Do if You’re Stuck on Campus During Winter Break

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So you’re stuck on campus during winter break. Things could be worse, right? Sure, you’re a little jealous of your friends who all get to go home for the holidays and enjoy family time, old high school pals and escaping school life for a bit. And yes, you could also do with a home-cooked meal or two. But don’t forget that staying on campus during a holiday break has its perks, too! Check out these suggestions for how to make your holiday break at school productive, peaceful and surprisingly fun.

1. Redo your room

Begin your upcoming second semester in an organized fashion with a clean, decorated and totally rearranged dorm room. Whether it’s a simple furniture swap or a major interior redecoration, changing up your living space can have a refreshing effect on you and can be a great way to stay busy during your break on campus.

If you’re the artsy type, get crafty with some fun DIY decor projects. “I try to craft when I get some free time, just little wish cards, canvases [or] pin boxes,” says Iris Goldsztajn, a sophomore at the University of California, Los Angeles. Other ideas include making a photo collage of the adventures you and your new college friends have had over your first semester or finally getting around to covering up those horrible dorm-room walls with posters, magazine pages or artwork.

Staying on campus over winter break also means that you can get that new-room feel by finally giving your dorm a deep and thorough cleaning (you know you procrastinate on that more than your homework). If you’re the roommate who hasn’t touched the vacuum cleaner since moving in (or doesn’t even know where it’s kept), now is the perfect time to do a bit of much-needed winter cleaning. Break out the dustpans and cleaning wipes, and make your soon-to-return roomie proud!

2. Make some new friends

Staying on campus for an entire break can get lonely, but don’t forget that there are tons of students just like you also wondering how they’re going to pass the time. If you’re lucky, meeting other students will keep you busy during your upcoming stay on campus and any future breaks that you both stay on campus for.

So if you’re feeling lonely and could use some company, try to figure out who else is on campus! Find those who are also skipping the trip back home by knocking on doors in your building (bring some snacks and suggest you have a movie marathon!), asking an on-campus RA if there is a list of students who decided to stay at school or even posting an “Anybody here?!” message on your university’s Facebook page.

Having a friend there to make the most of what is likely an almost entirely closed campus will make your holiday experience much more enjoyable. Plus, with a couple of friends, you’ll have people to celebrate the holidays with! Make the most of your holiday away from home by going out to dinner with your new friends or even gathering everyone in your dorm room and doing a white elephant or Secret Santa gift exchange.

3. Buckle down and focus

As boring as wasting away your winter break studying may seem, you definitely won’t regret spending a couple days getting ahead on your coursework for the upcoming semester.

If you’ve signed up for a particularly difficult class or you’re anticipating being slammed with homework next semester, get a head start on understanding the different concepts you’ll be learning. If you’re taking an English class, start reading the assigned novels. If you’re in a science or math class, get all the formulas and equations under your belt by taking a couple online YouTube tutorials. Already bought your textbooks for your new history or language class? Take the initiative to get a couple chapters ahead! No doubt your professor will be impressed with your readiness for the class and will keep you in mind as an A-worthy student. No one really likes the idea of being a teacher’s pet, but we bet you sure wouldn’t mind a good grade in a difficult class!

4. Get off the beaten path

As a collegiette, it’s hard to balance academics, socializing and your personal life – so much so that it often means that you can go through college without really having explored the area surrounding your campus. Whether your school is located within a big city or a quaint little town, get out, explore and see what it has to offer.

Maddie Lonky, a senior at Emory University, has stayed on campus over break multiple times and loves to explore. “Exploring the area of your college is a great thing to do!” she says. “And there are always deals [and] cheap ways to do it.”

Not sure of what to do? If you’re an old soul, see if there are any antique stores you can peruse (a great way to find unique pieces for your dorm room!). Are you a nature lover? Check online to see if there are any nearby trails to walk. If there’s a hipster deep down inside of you trying to break free, take an afternoon to check out that nearby cafe or coffee shop you’ve seen all your classmates Instagramming pictures from.

“In the past I've been on campus for parts of break, and I used this time to try new brunch and dinner places in my college town, Westwood, California,” Iris says. “I really like food, so trying out all these cool eateries and greasy diners is definitely a great time.”

Spending winter break eating greasy food? Count us in!

5. Try something new

While unwinding from what was probably a hectic and stressful first semester is a great idea, it doesn’t necessarily mean you have to spend your time Netflix-bingeing and sleeping. With no roommate, no obligations and no real schedule to adhere to, why not take a couple weeks and master a new talent or pick up a new hobby?

If you still want to relax this winter break but “couch potato” isn’t exactly what you’re going for, pick up a unique hobby that your friends are sure to be impressed by when they make their way back to campus. If beauty is your thing, then practice your nail art skills or attempt all of those super-confusing braid hairdos you keep seeing on Pinterest. If you’re lucky enough to have a kitchen in your dorm or apartment, spend your time cooking some holiday treats that are just a little fancier than your average batch of chocolate-chip cookies. There’s nothing better than bringing the holiday celebrations indoors with the scent of peppermint bark, after all!

6. Work, work, work

A great way to spend your time stuck on campus is working. If you already have a job that needs some holiday help, offer to work extra hours. If you don’t have a job, then start looking! You definitely won’t mind having a couple extra paychecks in your pocket for the spring semester. Plus, you might even start to rethink your plans to stay on campus for spring break (hello, Florida with the girls!).

Not only will working bring in some extra cash (by now you’re probably experiencing a serious emptiness in your pockets from all those spring semester textbooks you had to buy), but it will also make winter break go by much faster for you.

“I was able to work during [one break], so I got more money, which is always nice,” Maddie says. “It was an on-campus job and it definitely helped pass the time. It was a relatively short break, but it did keep me busy.”

Spending your time working is not only a way to be productive, but it’s also a great way to keep up that much-needed human interaction, especially if there aren’t many people on campus with you.

7. Commit to be fit

Winter break is a great time to start getting into shape. If you’re lucky enough to have a campus gym that is open during your holiday break, commit to following a solid workout plan that you will (hopefully) continue into the spring semester.

“I have had to stay on campus over some shorter breaks because I live too far away to go home for short periods of time,” says Caroline Pirozzolo, a freshman at Ithaca University. “While all my friends are gone and campus is quiet, I love getting up early to work out! It sounds crazy, but I love being up and getting a head start on the day. The gym is also really empty during breaks too, so no waiting for machines—a HUGE plus.”

Iris agrees, saying, “I love the gym being so empty! I can just chill on the elliptical and watch the Food Network!”

If your gym is closed but you still want to get fit this winter break, why not work out in your dorm room? With no end to the Pinterest workouts you can find online, you can make this winter break the one when you finally start the health kick you’ve been meaning to get around to. You know what that means—squats, yoga and breaking out that medicine ball!

8. Take a road trip 

So, you’ve spent a couple days of break on campus… and you’re totally bored. You watch Christmas movie marathons like nobody’s business, and you rarely wear pants. Basically, you need to get out.

Why not take a small road trip and visit a nearby city or tourist hot spot for the day?

“My freshman year of college I stayed on campus for my fall break,” Maddie says. “All my friends had left, but my older sister was able to come, and she stayed with me. We tried a lot of restaurants, went to a food festival and got to explore Atlanta together. We did the CNN tour, aquarium and World of Coca Cola — all major touristy things to do in ATL.”

Of her time in the big city, Maddie says, “It was fun to learn a new city and have my sister to do it with me and to get to do all the touristy things, since they are things everyone wants to do, but a lot never end up finding the time [to do].”

This option is great if the immediate area surrounding your campus isn’t that exciting or if you live next to a city that you have always wanted to visit. Grab a couple new friends (or have a family member visit) and make some memories!

The holidays away from home definitely aren’t ideal, but that doesn’t mean you can’t make the most of your time on campus. Whether it’s your first time staying at school for break or whether it’s one of your last, make it one that you will remember. After all, some of the best college memories are made during the times you would least expect!

Leighton Meester's Cover of Elvis's 'Blue Christmas' is Perfection

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It's no secret that there ain't no party like a Blair Waldorf party, especially around the holiday season. While Leighton Meester is no longer playing the resident scheme queen of the Upper East Side in Gossip Girl, she has found a way to keep the holiday spirit alive in a way that we know Queen B. would approve of.

We first heard Leighton's pipes of gold on Cobra Starship's "Good Girls Go Bad" and more recently on her 2014 debut album, Heartstrings, but nothing could prepare us for the early Christmas present Leighton and her BFF, Dana Williams, gave to the world via YouTube this week.

Dana, a singer and songwriter from Los Angeles, shared a live cover of Elvis'"Blue Christmas" that features the two friends, their two guitars, and their two angelic voices. (Can't forget about the percussion, shout out to their very own drummer boy, Chrystian Kaplan!)

With stockings hung from the fireplace behind them, Santa hats, a mini Christmas tree and Leighton's perfect crimson pout, it's hard not to feel red, green and Christmas-y all over! The cover is bluesy and folksy, a perfect combination for a song that is about not having your bae on Christmas day and a perfect fit for both of the singer's rich and smooth voices. From the duo's beautiful harmony to their effortless guitar strumming, this cover is flawless. 

This isn't the first time the pair has teamed up to unleash unbridled song cover perfection on the world, they have also covered Fleetwood Mac's "Dreams" and The Caravelles'"Dream of Me." It's safe to say it'll be much easier to dream of a white Christmas with their "Blue Christmas" cover on repeat. Let us hope that there's a whole Christmas album where this came from.

22 Signs You're So Not Ready to Adult

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The last thing any college student wants to think about is becoming a real person after graduation. We get so comfortable living in our own little world free of responsibilities that the thought of growing up will make us sick faster than a Friday night. Though we’re not all scared to move on to bigger and better things, there are many who are still trying desperately to find their way out of it.

Here are 22 signs you’re one of them.

1. Your favorite bar drinks look (and sound) like they were made for little kids.

Cinnamon toast crunch shot anyone?

2. You have to call mom every time you attempt to write a check.

So wait, what’s a “memo”?

3. Your form of budgeting consists of limiting yourself to happy hour specials.

$3 long islands? Wow, I’m going to save so much money. Go me.

4. You don’t understand how getting up at 6 a.m. every weekday is an actual thing.

You mean life exists before 10 a.m.?

5. Your go-to meals are sandwiches and cereal.

Less time making = more time eating.

6. Your only deadlines are at 11:59 p.m.

It’s due at 5 p.m.? What kind of establishment is this?

7. Looking socially acceptable when you leave the house is a rare occasion.

I would dress up but…I don’t really care.

8. Your most important conversations are on Tinder.

Holla at me boys.

9. You don’t understand how people got around before Uber.

Ew, walking is gross.

10. You get weirded out when boys do mature things.

What do you mean you want to take me on a “date”?

11. You consider 3 a.m. to be a solid bedtime.

Sleep is for old people.

12. You find it unacceptable to send emails after 4 p.m. on Fridays.

Sorry, my weekends begin promptly at 3:30 p.m.

13. Your most serious relationship is with Netflix.

It’s so real. He might be the one.

14. Your best work is done in the wee hours of the morning.

One essay, two online quizzes and a group project before sunrise…let’s do this.

15. You never know what’s going on with national news.

So what are these debates, and why does everyone keep talking about them?

16. You will attend things you have no interest in for free food.

Free pizza for all attendees? Sold.

17. You will wait until you physically have nothing to wear before you do laundry.

That sweatshirt from seventh grade is around here somewhere…

18. You need at least a 48-hour recovery period after a night of drinking.

Meeting on Sunday morning? Yeah, I’m going to take a raincheck. 

19. You frequently research ways to stay in college forever.

I think I’m going to take an extra year to expand my knowledge – I just love to learn!

20. You’re freaked out by how many of your friends are getting engaged.

Meanwhile, all I’m concerned about is who’s going to take me to formal.

21. You’re praying a job will magically appear at the end of graduation.

Hello? Fairy godmother? Yes, I’d like a job please.

22. The only word you hate more than “adult” is “responsibility.”

 

We don’t talk about that.

4 Steps for Throwing the Perfect Holiday Party

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With finals winding down, there’s a limited amount of time to celebrate the holidays on campus. But in between studying nonstop and living entirely off of coffee, take advantage of the time we have to get festive with all our friends on campus. Whether you’re into smaller, intimate celebrations or bigger, crazier shindigs, here are four tips for throwing the perfect holiday party!

1. Choose a Theme

Even the biggest fan of holiday parties can admit that they tend to get unoriginal. If you want your party to stand out, put a twist on the ordinary holiday theme with one of these options.

Ugly Christmas Sweater Party

A classic and silly way to celebrate the holidays is to host an ugly Christmas sweater party. Whether you have to take a trip to a local thrift shop or scavenge for crazy vintage pieces in your attic, you can find ridiculous holiday sweaters easily and inexpensively.

“Last year, my friends and I got dressed up in Christmas sweaters, decorated our dorm room and made a huge holiday dinner for ourselves while listening to Christmas music,” says Kelsey Pomeroy, a junior at Ohio State University.

Chrismukkah

Since Hanukkah and Christmas fall within a few weeks of each other, you can take a hint from The O.C. and merge the two holidays to create a big Chrismukkah bash.  The decorations can include everything from mistletoe to menorahs.  And, of course, it wouldn’t be complete without The O.C.-inspired cute and crafty yamaclauses, or yarmulke Santa hats, which you can easily DIY for all your guests!

Classy Christmas

Who doesn’t love an excuse to dress up? You and your friends can create your own classy event simply by dressing nicely and making more upscale arrangements with food, drinks and decorations.

Boston College graduate Meghan Gibbons has thrown a "Classy Christmas Party" with her friends for the past two years. “With all of us in college, I felt that we can act like grown-ups,” she says. “I had all my friends dress up in cute holiday dresses, and guys looked nice in button-downs. We served fancy appetizers [and] cocktails (or mocktails for those under 21), and it was a great photo op!”  So if you have a great dress that you’re dying to wear and you appreciate fun and fancy festivities, then this is the party theme for you!

2. Set the Atmosphere

Holiday parties are all about the atmosphere, so you can’t throw one without decorations and music! For a more casual party, red and green cups are a good choice for drinks, and you can buy either solid-colored plates and napkins or ones with holiday motifs. 

As for decorating the room, holiday lights, tinsel and wreaths are classic options that will set the mood and also tend to be relatively inexpensive. However, there are many DIY decorating options that can keep you from overspending and serve as fun activities to do with your friends to get you even more pumped to party! You could make paper snowflakes and a popcorn garland.

While any and all of these ideas will come across as festive, your décor will look even better when you stick to a decorative theme. For example, you may want to choose colored lights when going for a warm and traditional holiday look (great for an ugly sweater party), whereas white lights are a must if you want to turn the room into a winter wonderland (great for a classy party or Chrismukkah theme!).

As for music, classic, upbeat songs are perfect for a more casual event. If you want to give your party a more modern feel, you can include recent remixes of traditional holiday songs by artists such as Justin Bieber and Mariah Carey. A good option for a classy Christmas party is to skip the expected songs in favor of instrumental performances of traditional carols. For lots of (free!) Christmas music streaming stations, check out YulePlay.

3. Get Festive Food and Drinks

When throwing a holiday party, there are a ton of options for food and refreshments that will help set the mood. Holiday cookies and candy canes are a definite must, and to spice up your beverage selection, you can make holiday cocktails (or mocktails for those younger than 21). 

If you want your party to include dinner but you don’t have the time to spend in the kitchen or the money to order in for everyone, an excellent option is to have the party be a potluck, where everyone brings a food item to share. “For Christmas, my friends and I have a potluck dinner,” says Emma Chapple, a junior at St. Thomas University. “It's a cheap alternative to going out, and there's always tons of food left over!”

You can even turn unhealthy holiday classics into healthy alternatives so that before your finals diet of coffee and processed food sets in, you can enjoy festive food with your friends and save the leftovers as healthy study snacks! 

4. Include Activities

Even though you and your friends are bound to have fun just hanging out together at a holiday party, you can amp up your event with a few holiday-themed activities. A great idea to get a smaller, more intimate party started right is to have a secret Santa gift exchange at the beginning of the party. This requires planning, since all the guests will have to meet beforehand to draw names, but you can keep the gift-giving aspect as stress-free as possible by making DIY gifts or sweet treats.  

Barnard College graduate Christina Madsen recommends using Elftster for your gift exchange. “It's pretty cool because it will randomly assign everyone a person to buy a gift for and you can create wish lists so your Secret Santa knows what to get you,” she says.

Another easy activity option for a bigger group is to cut cards in half and throw them in a basket for people to select as they walk in. Then, the guests will have to find their match by the end of the party. This is great for a party where everyone may not necessarily know each other because it creates an excuse to go up to people with an obvious icebreaker. Other games that everyone can play include holiday movie trivia or card games like spoons or poker using candy canes.

With so many different ways to celebrate the holidays, there’s no reason not to throw a party! Whichever way you choose to get festive, the important thing is that you’re having fun with your on-campus family, which is what the holiday season is really about.


Links We Love 12.20.15

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How did Santa Claus end up on the U.S. military's radar? [The New York Times]

Heroic football player saves three girls' lives. [People]

Switching to a dumphone. [BoingBoing]

11 things you never knew about sleep. [YourTango]

Getting ready for the first Cyborg Olympics. [IEEE Spectrum]

What to do when your student loan grace period ends. [NerdWallet]

Signature cocktails for all 50 states. [Spoon University]

How our college system fails poor kids. [The Huffington Post]

Awww! A baby elf on a shelf. [PopSugar]

21 things to do for a better love life in 2016. [Thought Catalog]

 

Your Scented Candles Could be Dangerous

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Candles are a girl's go-to; they make superb spontaneous gifts, sooth us with their blissful scents, provide much-needed mood lighting and block out the smell of who-knows-what wafting through our dormitory hallways. But recent research suggests that they may be doing more harm than good.

If you've been experiencing inexplicable asthma or another respiratory problem, your air-freshener or desktop candle could be to blame. Women's Day reports on a multitude of scented-product risk factors you should be wary of, ranging from asthma and lung damage to tumors and even DNA alterations due to certain candle chemicals—terrifying. Daily Mail discusses one especially dangerous candle chemical: formaldehyde. According to Daily Mail,  formaldehyde's side effects range from nosebleeds to itchy eyes. Even worse, exposure to the carcinogen is considered a predictor of certain forms of cancer.

And leaving those wicks unlit isn't a solution. Women's Day warns that the mere presence of chemical-laden candles can expose your body to threats, lit or not. But are these warnings accurate, or overblown?

Recent findings have been dismissed by at least one source: The National Candle Association. In an interview with The Huffington Post, the association asserted that "The safety of scented candles is backed by decades of research, fragrance testing and a history of safe use," adding that "Health and safety studies are conducted for fragrance materials used in candles, including toxicological and dermatological tests." While we wish we could find comfort in these statements, it's important to remember that an association representing candle manufacturers is probably not an unbiased source. 

So what's a girl to do? For now, use caution when purchasing candles, and consider holding back on giving that set of scented tea lights to your mom for Christmas. The good news? Unscented candles appear to be currently in the clear, so if you really need to set the mood this holiday season, you're in luck.

Body Positive Model Tess Holliday Slams Victoria's Secret

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The fashion industry is starting to become more inclusive, and Tess Holliday is at the forefront of the movement. The 30-year-old made waves in the fashion world when she became the first size 22 model to sign with a major modeling agency, MiLK Model Management. She now has 1 million followers on Instagram and is becoming well-known for speaking out against today's restrictive beauty standards.

Now Holliday is challenging the veritable giant of beauty standards, Victoria's Secret, in an interview with Yahoo. She says that Victoria's Secret is unaccepting of different body types, specifically people who are "fat," a label that she embraces rather than shying away from. 

"They are perpetuating the image of what's wrong with America and with society, and in general, that you have to look a certain way, like a Victoria's Secret Angel, to feel beautiful and sexy," says Holliday.

This isn't the first time Holliday has reported a negative experience with the lingerie retailer. Last September in an interview with MTV, she complained about the brand's noticeable lack of plus-sized products. "There's a certain image that Victoria's Secret upholds for this 'perfect body,' and if they were to branch out and have plus-size women, it might—in their eyes—ruin that business and branding goal. I think to have the biggest lingerie retailer in the world carry plus-size lingerie would be a huge step in the right direction and an accomplishment." While the company may be considering their brand image, Holliday is urging Victoria's Secret to move with the times.

Her words remind us of Rebel Wilson's ingenious adaptation of a Victoria's Angel costume for this year's MTV Movie Awards in April. Wilson wore fluffy, white angel wings, an edgy black bra and leggings emblazoned with the word, "Think." Her statement was clear: like Holliday, Wilson does not believe that girls today should aspire to look like Victoria's Secret models and seeks to break apart the brand's perfectionist image.

We're hoping that Tess Holliday's interview won't be the last time someone speaks out about the rigorous body image standards in the fashion industry. 

These Are the Most Popular Models from 2015

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2015 has been the year for top models like Kendall Jenner and Gigi Hadid. They're just about everywhere, from magazine covers to the Chanel runways, trending social media posts to top campaigns. So when Tumblr released its list of this year's most popular models (or, otherwise known as a list of members of Taylor Swift's squad), we weren't surprised at all to see who made the top three.

There's more to the list than new faces, though. Naomi Campbell, Tyra Banks and Kate Moss are still as iconic as ever. Check out the full list below:

  1. Kendall Jenner
  2. Cara Delevingne
  3. Gigi Hadid
  4. Karlie Kloss
  5. Candice Swanepoel
  6. Naomi Campbell
  7. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley
  8. Kate Moss
  9. Jourdan Dunn
  10. Taylor Marie Hill
  11. Bella Hadid
  12. Aya Jones
  13. Adriana Lima
  14. Emily Ratajkowski
  15. Alexa Chung
  16. Imaan Hammam
  17. Kiko Mizuhara
  18. Tyra Banks
  19. Hailey Baldwin
  20. Lily Aldridge

How to Deal With Unsupportive Family During the Holidays

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Going from from being independent at school to being surrounded by family members at home for the holidays can be difficult for anyone. However, the transition can be even more difficult when you’re an LGBTQ+ collegiette and your family members are less than supportive. We rounded up tips for how to survive thisholiday season even when you have to deal with unsupportive family members.

1. Build your support system

Imagine this: You’re standing in your living room with your immediate and extended family members. No one is being outwardly rude, but not everyone is being extremely welcoming, either. The few family members whom you are close to are busy. You don’t know what to do with yourself. All you know is that your aunt and uncle keep peeking glances at you, and there seems to be some whispering that has nothing to do with the burnt crust on the pumpkin pie.

Does this seem like how your holiday celebrations might go? If so, it’s a good idea to start preparing now by coming up with ways to combat this discomfort.

“Have a self-support plan made up of people you can talk to or things to do to help yourself feel better,” says Dr. Diane Sanford, owner of the Midwest Mind Body Health Center.

Christina Miller, a current student in the Master of Public Health program at the University at Albany, says it’s smart to plan ahead for these overwhelming situations by finding your outside support system ahead of time.

“Identify a self-care buddy. This is someone you can text, Facebook message, etc. when you are feeling overwhelmed, isolated or unsupported over the holidays,” she says. “Along with reaching out to this person during more challenging moments, you can also exchange silly Snapchats [and] pictures or play Words With Friends in a way that makes you feel supported or cared for.”

This self-care buddy can be anyone you know will be on your side. Steven Petrow, an LGBT issues columnist for The Washington Post, says, “Make sure you have an ally present—whether a friend, a sibling, one parent or another relative. Let him or her know ahead of time you may need them to speak up.”

This can mean identifying supportive family members now, even if that means turning to extended family or significant others. Review Facebook profiles—who changed their profile picture during the Human Rights Campaign’s go-red-for-marriage-equality push?

Sometimes all it takes to have a happier holiday is having a few allies in the room who can talk to you without staring at your new haircut or your outfit and commenting on how you “seem different.”

2.  Stay positive

Sometimes our concerns are really just us psyching ourselves out. Maybe your family members are more supportive than you think, or maybe they’ve grown more supportive during the time that you’ve been gone at school. For some family members who are on the fence about LGBTQ+ issues, all it takes to push them toward the side of support is some time to think and research.

Dr. Sanford, who blogs about self-care, says, “Don’t make assumptions about how others will be towards you. Go into situations with a cautiously positive attitude.”

If you can, try approaching the situation with an open mind. Try not to be standoffish or to keep to yourself during family gatherings. Your assumed dislike for your family could make them respond by treating you strangely and leave you wondering if they don’t like you because of your sexuality or gender identity. Maybe all those whispers are just them wondering why you don’t seem as engaged as you used to.

Try to fill yourself with positive thoughts. “Tell yourself, ‘Peace begins with me’ when you are in a surrounding that doesn't feel supportive,” says Anne-Sophia Reinhardt, self-love expert and blogger. “Repeat it as your mantra and say it as often as you want until you feel some relief and release of anger, pain, etc.”

Still, it’s best to remain cautious, Dr. Sanford says. Avoid throwing yourself into situations that can be potentially harmful to your emotional or physical well-being. If you’re arguing with a family member and he or she seems to be getting more and more aggressive, know it’s okay to back down. “Have an exit strategy in case problems develop,” Dr. Sanford says. Shoot a text to your ally and have him or her call you.

3. Stay healthy

With all of the stress over potential confrontation and plain awkwardness, plan on taking care of yourself mentally, emotionally and physically. Even if you can’t control the interactions you engage in or the emotional impacts of these interactions, you can control how you are taking care of yourself.

“Make sure to stay well rested, well fed and well nourished and supported in all your emotional health needs,” Dr. Sanford says. “The better you feel [in your] mind, body and spirit, the easier it will be for you to deal with whatever comes up.”

If you’re struggling with taking care of your mental and emotional self, it can be helpful to turn your attention to your body.

Miller says, “Eat the healthiest foods available to you, get a good night’s rest and exercise. Take a walk, play football with the cousins or even shovel the driveway. Feeling healthy will make it easier to deal with the stress you are experiencing.”

If you’ve taken care of yourself, you may feel more ready for confrontation if it comes (and hopefully it just won’t come at all).

4. Be prepared for confrontation if it does come

During the holidays, we often get trapped in awkward conversations with our family members. For some LGBTQ+ folks, these conversations, such as family members questioning their sexuality, can feel like attacks.

To deal with this, Reinhardt says, “Speak up for yourself. Don't let people walk all over you.” If a family member says something problematic, call him or her out. Explain why what he or she said isn’t okay.

Petrow, author of Steven Petrow’s Complete Gay & Lesbian Manners, recommends being straightforward. He says, “If someone tells an anti-LGBT joke, you can respond simply: ‘That’s not funny.’”

When it comes to surviving a nasty confrontation on the spot, Dr. Sanford says, “First, you can politely say that you do not want to talk about it and change the subject.” If your family member persists? “Tell them, ‘Not now’ firmly and walk away if you cannot get them to stop. You do not need to be abused by what others have to say, especially at the holidays.”

If speaking up is too much for you, Miller says, “Allow yourself to ‘tap out’ from conversations that are too challenging or too triggering. Sometimes we may feel the constant need to justify ourselves, our communities and/or our values to our families. That being said, you by no means must continue within conversations that feel unsafe or too draining. Sometimes self-preservation is the most effective form of rebellion.”

5. Pause and breathe

In order to survive confrontation when it does happen, try to stay calm.

“One of my most fundamental and helpful self-care practices is just to breathe,” Reinhardt says. “I take three long, deep belly breaths before I have my first cup of coffee, and it helps me to ground myself and get ready for the day. You can breathe when you get into an argument or feel like you're not being supported. It's a ‘quick fix’ that creates a relaxation response and helps you to stay true to yourself.”

This can especially come in handy if your family members are sitting around and talking about something that hurts your feelings, or if you’re just feeling left out. It’s harder to speak up in group settings, so it may be easiest to just focus on yourself.

6. Escape for a moment

If you can’t handle how tense things are in your household, Reinhardt says to take a walk. You have the right to escape when you feel close to exploding.

“Just leave and be with yourself for a while,” she says. “Breathe in fresh air, notice what happens around you, hear new sounds and feel your feet on the ground.”

Miller says you can do anything “that you enjoy and that reinforces your you-ness. If you feel stressed out or even as though you cannot be your complete self at home, doing activities that put you in touch with the things you love about yourself will help you to stay grounded.”

Try going for a run, practicing yoga or heading out for a solo shopping spree. Why not get a break from your family members under the guise of enjoying the outdoors or the holiday sales?

7. Have a backup plan

If all else fails, it’s best to have a backup plan.

“Hopefully the stress during the holidays will not escalate into an unsafe situation, but if possible, it's best to have a few numbers stored in your cell phone … of a friend or friend of a friend you may be able to crash with if you need to get out,” Miller says.

If you feel close to the edge or even in danger with the extent of homophobia or transphobia in your household, know that you have the right to escape. Be sure to check in with your friends if you start feeling really uncomfortable with your situation, and try not to feel guilty for not managing to stick with your family throughout the holidays. Sometimes you have to put yourself before others, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

We hope that these tips make the holidays more bearable. Remember—you need to take care of yourself!

9 Celebrities Who Furthered the Feminist Movement in 2015

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Feminism is the belief that women and men should be politically, socially, and economically equal. While to most of us that seems like a no-brainer, feminism hasn't always been welcomed in the way it is today. In the past few years, feminism has moved from being viewed as a dirty word to a label and belief system that women and men have begun to embrace. A large portion of this newfound acceptance of feminism has come from celebrities actively advocating and publicizing their feminist views. Here are the top celebs who helped further the movement this year:

1. Hillary Clinton

Regardless of your political views or whether you'll be checking her name on your ballot in 2016, Hillary Clinton has been making strides for feminism all year (and obviously long before that). In her interview with Lena Dunham for Lenny Letter, Hillary said, “I’m a feminist, and I say it whenever I’m asked. I'm always a little bit puzzled when any woman, of whatever age but particularly a young woman, says something like, ‘Well, I believe in equal rights, but I’m not a feminist.'” Hillary Clinton's unapologetic use of the word 'feminism' has us all jumping for joy, and inspired us to loudly proclaim that we are feminists, too. 

2. Amy Schumer

Feminist and comedian extraordinaire, Amy Schumer is unbashedly unafraid to be funny and feminist, two things that not long ago many people wouldn't have believed could coexist. In her hit Comedy Central show Inside Amy Schumer and her movie Trainwreck Amy tackles hard-hitting issues such as sexist stereotypes, rape culture, equal pay, harmful gender stereotypes and reproductive rights. Using satire in a smart, relatable way, Amy creates an accessible space where large, often daunting issues can be discussed and understood, and we think it's absolutely fab.

3. Emma Watson

After her iconic United Nations speech in support of the #HeForShe campaign, which aims to unite women and men as feminists to fight for gender equality, how could we not include Emma on our list? After saying in an interview with Porter Magazine that she had been discouraged from using the word "feminist" in her speech and choosing to do so anyways, Emma has our heart. She was quoted in Porter as saying, “If women are terrified to use the word, how on earth are men supposed to start using it?” and we couldn't agree more. Keep doing you, Emma! 

4. Lena Dunhan

Lena has been widely discussed in feminist circles for a handful of years now, but with her new project the Lenny Letter she is right back in the limelight. Lena's Lenny Letter describes itself as “a snark-free place for feminists to get information: on how to vote, eat, dress, fuck, and live better,” and we think that's totally dreamyLena never fails to amaze, and what she's doing with Lenny Letter is no different. 

5. Emma Thompson

Oscar award-winning actress Emma Thompson says she has been a "card-carrying, radical feminist" since she was 19, which is why she takes offense when women don't label themselves as such. In an interview with Vulture she says, “It’s bizarre. Any woman who says they’re not a feminist is basically saying that they don’t believe in equal rights for women.” We love how Emma is so blunt about what feminism is. 

6. Joseph Gordon-Levitt 

Joseph Gordon-Levitt said his choice to identify as a feminist comes from the fact that there's more work that needs to be done to help achieve equality. He says: "There were some people that were saying that feminism made sense in the past but it doesn't anymore because men and women are equal now. I'm no expert, but I think the facts are pretty contrary to this. There are still plenty of tensions and unfair situations that arise more so for women than for men." We love how Joseph is using his celebrity status to share that message.

7. Ryan Gosling

Ryan Gosling says he's "attracted to films that have strong female characters because there are strong female characters in my life." Gosling has said that female equality is important to him now more than ever after becoming the father of a baby girl. He says feminism and female equality "are becoming not more important to me, but more important in general, I think" and we totally agree. 

8. Amy Poehler

Amy Poehler is fantastically feminist in her comedy, but what we've been most excited about in 2015 is Amy Poehler's Smart Girlsa website that encourages girls to "change the world by being yourself." The site says that it's "dedicated to helping young people cultivate their authentic selves. We emphasize intelligence and imagination over 'fitting in.' We celebrate curiosity over gossip. We are a place where people can truly be their weird and wonderful selves. We are funny first, and informative second, hosting the party you want to attend." And if that doesn't sound amazing and feminist to you, we don't know what does! Thanks for creating such an amazing space for young women, Amy.

9. Jennifer Lawrence

Jennifer Lawrence penned an amazing essay this year for Lena Dunham’s Lenny Letter about her feelings on the gender wage gap. When she found out that she was making less money than her male counterparts for the same work, she admitted she blamed herself. She is the first to admit that she is not upset about the lost money she could’ve potentially earned, but rather the pay discrepancy because of her gender. At the end of her letter, Lawrence writes, “I’m over trying to find the ’adorable’ way to state my opinion and still be likable! Fuck that. I don’t think I’ve ever worked for a man in charge who spent time contemplating what angle he should use to have his voice heard. It’s just heard.” We love her fiery passion for equal pay!

We SO appreciate all the celebrities who have spoken in favor of feminism in 2015 and have worked to address the inequalities currently present in our world. We can't wait to see the strides feminism makes in 2016!

Watch the Year's Top Music Videos Here

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While we are now long removed from the early days of MTV (does MTV even show music videos anymore?) when musicians first began making short movies to accompany their popular hits, music videos are still a big part of the entertainment industry. Remember when Drake's "Hotline Bling" hit the internet? The sheer number of memes created alone almost broke the internet, including this gem:

  

And how could we forget when Adele dropped her video for "Hello" not long ago? We don't know about you, but we're still belting it at the top of our lungs in the shower, in the car...

YouTube has since replaced MTV as the go-to place for music video premieres, and they've just released a list of the ten most watched videos of 2015. So without further ado, here are the videos we visited the most this year!

10. Sia - "Elastic Heart (ft. Shia LaBeouf & Maddie Ziegler)"

9. Silentó - "Watch Me (Whip/Nae Nae)"

8. Fifth Harmony ft. Kid Ink - "Worth It"

7. David Guetta ft. Nicki Minaj, Bebe Rexha & Afrojack - "Hey Mama"

6. Taylor Swift ft. Kendrick Lamar - "Bad Blood"

5. Adele - "Hello"

4. Ellie Goulding - "Love Me Like You Do"

3. Major Lazer & DJ Snake ft. MØ - "Lean On"

2. Maroon 5 - "Sugar"

and for a surprising but heartwarming finish:

1. Wiz Khalifa ft. Charlie Puth - "See You Again"


15 Signs You're A Midwestern Girl

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Everyone's got a sense of hometown pride, but the love people have for the Midwest takes it to a whole different level. Check out these signs that you are a born and bred Midwestern girl: 

1. You know state fairs are a big deal 

You know, that thing where everyone gets all dolled up to go to a place with pig races. 

2. Like, you’ve probably seen way too many sculptures made of butter in your lifetime 

 
And you always had so many questions. Like who. And why. And how...

3. And you definitely know someone* who always used to compete in the annual state fair pageant 

*It was you, don't lie.

4. But most importantly, you know fair food is a totally acceptable food category in the Midwest 

If it's deep fried, on a stick or covered in powder sugar, send it our way. 

5. Speaking of the Midwest, you're not exactly sure which states it's comprised of... 

It's Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, Nebraska, North Dakota, Ohio, South Dakota and Wisconsin, in case you were wondering. 

6. But you do know that we take our football very, very seriously 

Whether that's at the high school level or college (especially if you go to a state school).

7. ...And that nowhere in the world could be so beautiful in the fall.

Can anywhere else really compete? 

8. Your only view on your drive to and from college is cornfield after cornfield 

And we wouldn't have it any other way. Who doesn't love those iconic red barns? 

9. But while outsiders think of the Midwest as one giant farm, you know the cities are amazing

We have Chicago, Kansas City, Cleveland, Columbus, Milwaukee, Omaha, Minneapolis, Indianapolis, St.Louis... what more could you ask for?!

10. You love shows like Parks and Rec and Glee because they celebrate those small Midwestern towns 

Pawnee, Indiana and Lima, Ohio for life. 

11. The weather is actually insane

...But you're also kind of over seeing the flood of seasonal tweets complaining about it. 

12. You also get sick of hearing about whether it's pop or soda

Does it really matter? 

14. Games like Cornhole and KanJam are classic past times 

Nothing can beat those backyard summertime memories. 

15. Most importantly, you know Midwest is best

And it will always be home. 

Midwest, we love you! 

5 Pieces of Real Talk About Getting Rejected from Your Early Decision School

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You open your email one December evening to see a new unread message from your dream college, with “Your Application Status” in the title, screaming at you in the characteristic bold letters that indicate a message that has yet to be seen.

You’re caught off guard but you take in a breath and click on it. You glance at the first five words of the letter and immediately look away. “We regret to inform you…” is displayed legibly in your mind even when you shut your eyes. You had worked so hard on your application, put so much thought into the essays, made sure to extensively participate in a collection of extracurriculars, and worked hard on your grades and standardized test scores, just to see those five words and be burdened with the responsibility of having a new plan.

It happens. It’s common. And it’s okay.

You know how hard you worked, and best way to approach this situation is to let go of it and move on. It may be easier said than done, but it’s worth it. Just sit back and take each of these doses of optimism and advice with a cup of hot coffee.

1. Reward yourself for taking the risk

Remember that you didn’t lose anything. Your life is still the same. It’s still the same, wonderful existence (regardless of tough times) that involves froyo with your best friends and festive holiday dinners with family. You took a chance to better yourself, but did this experience actually take anything away from your life?

You may argue, “This rejection took away an opportunity.” We don’t believe you. You have chances to transfer to your dream school after a couple of undergrad years. You could even opt for grad school at your dream college in the long run!

“You are meant to be where you are meant to be,” says Kayla Lewkowicz, a 2014 graduate of Colby College. “I got rejected from my first choice school but had an amazing wonderful college experience at another school and I would never go back.” You are meant to accomplish great things, but perhaps in a different route from the one you were planning.

So don’t ever say you lost an opportunity when there are many chances for you to explore. And if you’re really devoted to your Early Decision school, don’t let go of the possibility. There are always other ways to chase your aspirations. But for now, the big success is the step you took to take the risk on your first college application.

2. You can’t change something beyond your control, so don’t dwell on it

It is a waste of time to think about something you can’t go back and change. Don’t spend time telling yourself, “I should have taken the ACT one more time” or “I should have written my essay about something else.” You can think of all the things you “should have done,” but can you create a legitimate plan that will let you change the past? Instead of channeling the “should have, could have, would have” thoughts, direct these sentiments towards answers to a more practical question: “What can I do differently on my next applications?”

We have gathered a few expert opinions on college admissions to give you a few ideas.

“Even if a student shows demonstrated interest, submits a well-thought out application and meets the school’s academic criteria, they can still be rejected from a school. If this happens, students shouldn’t get despondent. There are so many amazing colleges and universities in the US, and many can be the right fit,” says Dr. Kat Cohen, founder and CEO of IvyWise (an educational consulting company). Dr. Cohen is among the leading independent university admissions counselors in the world, who also specializes in counseling students who wish to attend highly selective universities, transfer students, and international students.

Dr. Cohen emphasizes the importance of expressing interest in your prospective schools. “Students should treat every college they apply to as their top-choice.” Additionally, “Colleges/universities want to maintain high yield rates, so they want to know that a student is likely to attend that school if they are admitted. What I see most is students not presenting their best self to the admissions committee. Either not being themselves and trying to make themselves into the applicant they think the college wants to see, or not spending enough time crafting compelling essays. Laziness can really hurt your application.”

For those final touches on your next batch of applications, consider campus visits, study up for you interviews, and really let your interest show through in your application essay. Think of ways you can academically and socially contribute to the environment of the school.

Through further research, you might end up dreaming about a different school a few weeks down the road. “My senior year of high school, I was dead set on going to Syracuse, so I applied early decision,” says Rachel Petty, a junior at James Madison University. “I ended up getting deferred to regular admission, and in the block of time before regular acceptances came out, I decided I wanted to go to James Madison University. I didn't end up getting into Syracuse, but it was for the better! I'm extremely happy at JMU and I took it as a sign that I wasn't meant to be at Syracuse.”

Heather Parry from Parry College Counseling (a Seattle-based college counseling company) expanded on the significance of demonstrated interest on a college application. “Demonstrated interest is becoming more and more important in the college application review process. This is the extent to which the student interacts with the college before applying.” According to Parry, you need to ask yourself if you “understand the college's mission and social culture,” as well as whether you would “be a good fit on that campus, become active leaders, and graduate on time.” The power you have is in the research you do. “Colleges want students who will be successful on their campuses, and they also seek to admit students who are most likely to say ‘yes’ if offered admission. These days, GPA and test scores aren't the only factors at play,” adds Parry.

It is also important to demonstrate your interest for your prospective field of study (unless you are undecided), according to independent educational consultant Colleen Ganjian, “For any student with particular career aspirations who plans to pursue a pre-professional course of study, it is very important to show demonstrated interest in that field during the application process. There are very few schools [that] will accept a prospective engineer who has not shown a strong interest in STEM, for example. This would be the case at any college.”

Dr. Cohen suggests applying to 10 to 13 schools, “all of which are the right academic, social and financial fits for [you],” She also advises having “a number of ‘reach,’ ‘target,’ and ‘likely’ schools on their list. Each school on the list should make [you] excited.”

Think about your college shortlist for the next round of applications. How passionate are you about them? If you aren’t passionate about them, find reasons to be or modify your shortlist. Don’t fake demonstrated interest. Do what you can to find your fit.

So what exactly does it mean for a college to be a “fit” for you, despite your numbers and qualifications? Bring on college application truth #3.

Related: You Got Rejected from Your Dream School: Now What?

3. Your situation doesn’t mean you’re not “qualified enough”

TBH, your rejection might not even have to do with your performance on exams and courses. According to Dr. Cohen, “Colleges have institutional needs that vary from year to year. While students can’t control what a specific school is looking for in a given year (an astrophysicist, an opera singer), but they can demonstrate how their passions, grit and perseverance make them unique.”

Your situation also has to do with whether the college was the “perfect fit” for you. An admissions officer may read your essays and imagine how you would feel in the college’s environment. Each college has a distinct culture, and if your aspirations don’t align with the customs of the school, you might not get in--even if you have excellent standardized test scores and high school credentials. For example, if you are a student whose primary goal is to become a doctor, you’ll want to go to a “pre-professional”-oriented school. If you apply to a more intellectual/philosophical environment, you may have a lower chance of getting accepted.

Depending on your school and intended major, you may be placed in a more competitive application pool than if you were to pursue a different major.

“One reason that a student with ‘good numbers’ may be rejected from a university is that they are applying to a department that attracts a larger proportion of the applicants,” says Dr. Alfred Poor, a speaker and author of 7 Success Secrets That Every College Student Needs to Know. “Declaring a major—or even an interest in a given field—may put the candidate in greater competition for an admissions slot.”

For instance: if you want to major in chemistry, but apply to a school that is renowned for its chemistry program, the competition may be more stiff than if you were applying to that same school with a different major. “Picking a university that has lower enrollment in the target department could increase your chances of getting admitted (but this then raises questions about the quality of that particular program, if others aren't applying to get into it),” adds Dr. Poor. “At some schools, you can increase your chances of admission by not expressing any preference for a field. You do run the risk of not being admitted for a particular major once you get there, however.”

Similarly, Ganjian made us aware of what checking that “Pre-med” box may indicate. “An applicant checking the box on an application that indicates an interest in a pre-med curriculum will almost always make things harder for herself...A prospective pre-med student is automatically subject to much more competition among a select group of very intelligent students.”

Besides academic fit, admissions officers will consider your preferred college environment. “If a student applying to a large university writes in his or her essay about how much they love being part of a small campus community, then that student isn’t going to necessarily be the best fit – admission officers pick up on that stuff,” notes Dr. Cohen.

Brie Davis, a freshman at Ryerson University, was rejected from her first-choice school. Though she was initially heartbroken, she looked past the obstacle by focusing on the positives. “This is only one school, [and] it does not define my success,” she says. “I realized that there was a reason why I didn't get in. It wasn't because I wasn't good enough; it was just because this school wasn't fit for me. Because I applied early decision, I still had a few months to apply to other dream schools and ones that could really fit me better than my original school.” Having a first-choice school doesn’t necessarily mean it’s the one and only school for you. Use this situation as an opportunity to explore the many choices available to you. Treat your Early Decision outcome as a reset button. The biggest takeaway is to move on (though it may be easier said than done) and show the same enthusiasm for new schools that you showed on your first college application!

Related: 10 Ways to Recover from Your College Rejection (That Won’t Make You Roll Your Eyes)

4. Many successful people have failed before achieving eventual greatness

J.K. Rowling was rejected by twelve publishers before Harry Potter became published, in addition to being nearly penniless and raising a child on her own. Stephen King’s first novel Carrie was rejected thirty times before he became a published author who has sold over 350 million books all over the world. Oprah Winfrey was fired as a television reporter because she was “not suited for television.”

What do they all have in common? They didn’t give up after one, two or three rejections. So when you continue your next round of applications, complete them with the same amount of care and enthusiasm as you did with your Early Decision app. Don’t lose motivation because of this one slip.

5. No matter what school you go to, you will still experience “pseudo-adulthood”

Remember that whether or not you get into your dream school, you’ll experience the following at the college you’ll end up going to:

  • You will make amazing friends and connections.
  • You will discover your interests and develop your talents.
  • You will experience finals week, just like every other college kid in America.
  • You will be challenged.
  • You will still get to call your mom to ask her whether it’s okay to wash your white-and-green striped shirt with your whites.
  • You will get to pursue cool projects or even study abroad!
  • You will have a blast. (And if you don’t, there are always other options.)

“Keep telling yourself there are other chances in life, and other experiences that are just as amazing,” says Brie. Because let’s be real—the juiciest apple on the tree might not be the one you have been trying to pick.

Your rejection cannot necessarily be attributed to your academic stats. It also has to do with how much interest you showed to your dream school, as well your career aspirations you shared with the admissions officers. It turns out that your admission depends on the demographics of the entire application pool. You are enough. But admissions officers make the best assumptions they can to determine if you can thrive at that university, and if it is an ideal academic and social match for you. It’s not about ability; some of it has to do with what admissions officers believe would be best for its applicants. It’s like buying a birthday present for someone you don’t know well. You do your best to guess, but sometimes the recipient doesn’t end up liking the gift.

Things may seem tough now, but just think of it as a small blip in the grand scheme of your life. Getting rejected from a college is of miniscule significance in the long run. What makes the long-term significance is how you handle the resources and opportunities available to you. Make do with what you have, because a rejection letter is not a reflection of your abilities.

The Complete Guide to Not Washing Your Hair

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Like showering and brushing your teeth, washing your hair is just something you should do daily to keep clean, right? Not quite. Actually, much of the beauty community says otherwise. Believe it or not, those of us washing our hair every single day are washing it too much. In fact, limiting your shampoo use to only a few times a week can actually be one of the best ways to keep your hair healthy, strong and shiny—and yes, it’s totally possible to avoid the sloppy, greasy look while following this kind of routine. Read on and get ready for your locks to look better than ever!

Why go longer in between washes?

Sure, washing your hair less often to make your hair healthier may seem counterintuitive, but plenty of collegiettes are jumping on the less-is-more bandwagon—and for good reason. More and more frequently, stylists and hair care experts are suggesting that washing your hair every single day is too much. After all, in order to be strong and healthy, your hair needs some oil—and often, harsh shampoos can strip your hair of the natural oils it needs.

Celebrity hairstylist Christine Symonds, who has worked with stars like Lauren Conrad and Whitney Port (#hairgoals much?), says that washing less often is key to keeping hair healthy.

“Over-washing hair can strip hair of its natural oils and moisturizers,” Symonds says. “By washing it less you will have healthier, more nourished hair.”

It’s also important to note that just because you don’t wash your hair doesn’t mean you shouldn’t shower at all! If you’re an athlete or work out daily, just a simple rinse in the shower will be enough to get rid of sweat, but still keep the natural oils your hair needs!

For color-treated hair

If you color your hair, washing less frequently can also be a great way to keep your color intact for longer—and, as a result, save you major cash on trips to the salon for touch-ups. Victoria Mikula, a sophomore at Point Park University, says washing her hair less has allowed her to maintain her color longer.

“My hair is much softer and healthier now and my color even seems to stay vibrant longer,” Victoria says.

For girls with curls

Have springy curls? Susonnah Barklow, an editor at Naturally Curly, says shampooing less often may be a way to keep them in check, since your hair type is likely drier than others.

“So many women wonder why their hair is so dry when all they have to 
do is stop washing their hair every day,” Barklow says. “Once you wash less frequently, your 
hair is better at retaining moisture that it needs to be healthy and shiny.”

Jordan Chaffiotte, a junior at Philadelphia University, has found that shampooing less often has made her curls much more manageable. “This is really big in the curly-haired community,” Jordan says. “Shampooing every day dries it out quicker.”

Curly, color-treated, fine, thick—no matter your hair type, it’s likely that washing your hair less will majorly impact the health of your hair for the better!

How long should you wait in between washes?

Ultimately, when you shampoo depends on your hair type and texture—generally if your hair is dry or curly, you’ll be able to go much longer between washes than someone with fine, straight hair. A good rule of thumb is to wait around one to two days in between washes. Abigail Zeitler, a junior at the University of Texas at Austin, follows this routine. “My hairstylists have told me that it takes about a day or two for the natural oils to restore between washes,” she says.

If your hair is thicker or curlier, washing only one to two times a week may work best for you. Barklow has found this routine to work for her curls. “Once your scalp levels its sebum production you will be able to go a couple
 of days without washing and feel fine,” Barklow says. “I will wash my hair twice a week;
 some women will wash once a week.”

With a bit of trial and error, it’s easy to find out which routine works best for keeping your hair healthy, not greasy!

Will washing my hair less make it greasy?

It can be tempting to overdo it on washing your hair in fear of the dreaded greasy strands—but fear not, collegiettes! While your hair might be a little bit greasier as you first back down on your shampoo use, your hair will ultimately get used to the new routine (which will make it healthier in the long run!)

“I probably only wash my hair about two-three times a week,” Victoria says. “When I first started doing this, my hair was a bit greasier than normal, but after about two weeks it started to adjust!”

To combat this greasiness at first, Barklow suggests starting the process slowly, and gradually washing hair less frequently over time.

“My recommendation for anyone who wants to try shampooing less is to take it
 slow,” Barklow suggests. “Skip one day of washing, and do this for a week. Then skip two days,
 and do this for another week. Then skip three. Your scalp may feel really
 oily at first. It may take a couple of weeks for your scalp to adjust.”

As you cut back on shampooing, it’s also important to keep in mind the type of shampoo and other products you use on your hair when you do shampoo, in order to avoid buildup that could potentially cause your hair to become dirtier faster. Abigail suggests paying close attention to the ingredient label on your shampoo, which could have a major effect on how quickly your hair gets greasy. “Using an all-natural shampoo helps as well because there are no additives in it that add grease to your hair,” she says.

If your hair is super fine or you really just can’t handle the extra oil, using a clarifying shampoo, like Frederic Fekkai’s Apple Cider Shampoo once a week can be a great way to make your hair feel extra clean without stripping it of natural oils.

How do I keep my hair looking fresh in between washes?

To keep your hair looking fresh and voluminous in between washes, it’s likely that you’ll need to use some form of dry shampoo. We like products you can quickly spray into your hair during a morning rush to get to class, like Dove Style + Care Dry Shampoo ($6.11 at Drugstore.com), or Not Your Mother’s Clean Freak Dry Shampoo ($6.19 at ULTA). If your hair is a darker hue, it can also be a great idea to try one specifically matched to your brunette shade, like Batiste’s Dry Shampoo in Deep Brown ($7.29 at Drugstore.com).  

Katie Piscopio, a junior at the University of Pittsburgh, opts to use talcum powder instead of dry shampoo to combat greasiness. “I have thick, curly hair, so I would go through a bottle of dry shampoo in just a few days,” Katie says. “Instead, I use baby powder! I always have a small travel bottle of Johnson's Baby Powder at home or when I travel. It works just as well as dry shampoo and doesn't run out as quickly!”

If dry shampoo isn’t your thing, don’t be afraid to get creative! Different hair care routines work for different hair types. Instead of using dry shampoo, Monica Ocasio Vega, a senior at the University of Puerto Rico at Mayaguez, uses a bit of water and leave-in conditioner to freshen up after a workout.

“I try to wash [my hair] every two days and between those days if I came from a run,” Monica says. “I spray it with water, apply a bit of leave-in conditioner, run my fingers through it and let it air dry.”

The bottom line? What works for one hair type might not work for another, so don’t be afraid to experiment!

If you want stronger, shinier, healthier hair, cutting back on your shampoo use is one of the best things you can do for your mane! With a little trial and error, it’s not hard to find the best routine that will keep your locks looking glossy—not greasy.

How She Got There: Olivia Muenter, Associate Fashion & Beauty Editor at Bustle

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Name: Olivia Muenter
Age: 22
Job Title and Description: Associate Fashion & Beauty Editor at Bustle— I cover everything from fashion/beauty news to health tips. A lot of my job involves optimizing fashion, beauty and lifestyle content for Pinterest, as well. I have a team of 10 or so writers who I work with throughout the week.
College Name/Major: University of Florida/Journalism
Instagram Handle: @oliviamuenter
Twitter Handle: @oliviamuenter

What does your current job at Bustle entail? Is there such a thing as a typical day? 

Olivia Muenter: Every day is slightly different! On Mondays, I work with writers to cover breaking fashion and beauty news, and the rest of the week I work with a team of writers to create service content. Service content is basically any article that involves tips, tricks or hacks. Sometimes there are other opportunities that pop up, like covering fun events or fashion and beauty previews, and I do that stuff as well.

What is the best part of your job?

OM: I love working with so many different writers, since that’s how I started with Bustle myself. It’s fun to assign, read and edit so much different and unique content during a day, even if it is a lot of work sometimes. I also really enjoy working for a site that’s goal is to empower and support women; it’s amazing to be around so many creative, inspiring people every day. I also love being able to go to fun events, interview celebrities now and then and get free beauty products — that never hurts, of course. 

What is one thing you wish you knew about the editorial industry when you first started out that you know now?

​OM: I wish I knew just how different it would be going from interning seemingly 24/7 and being in college to having an actual “9 to 5” (no one in NY works just 9 to 5, though — another thing I wish I would have known) job. I think any new job is going to be a huge transition, but I think your first one after college is especially overwhelming at first as you have nothing to compare it to. I wish I was more prepared for that.

Since you’ve done a lot of editing and writing on beauty and fashion, do you have any tips for college women hoping to break into those specific verticals?

​OM: I think the biggest piece of advice I could give to any woman who’s hoping to work at a fashion magazine or publication is to let go of the idea of a “dream job” entirely. This sounds kind of odd, but especially in the field of fashion and beauty journalism, I think many girls get swept up with the idea of working at XYZ publication instead of  actively discovering the specific type of work that makes them happy and what exactly makes them tick. The fact of the matter is that even if a certain job title sounds like it would look super cool on your Instagram bio, in reality you might not be a fan of the company culture or the everyday requirements of the job itself. Focus on the actual activities and challenges that make you feel the most fulfilled, and try to find a job (and, before that, internships and other opportunities) that fits those parameters instead. 

Who is one person who changed your professional life for the better?

​OM: I can’t think of one person in particular, but being involved in my college’s magazine club really changed my professional career. It was where I heard about Bustle to begin with, actually, and what motivated me to apply for an internship when I (and no one else) had ever heard of the brand new site before. I also made a ton of connections who now live in New York and work in similar fields. 

What words of wisdom do you find most valuable?

​OM: I don’t remember where exactly I heard this advice, but I’ve gotten in the habit of this little go-to routine whenever I feel worried, embarrassed, overwhelmed — basically any negative emotion. I get out my iPhone, open up a note, type out the following questions and answer them: What’s bothering you? Can you control what’s bothering you? If the answer is yes: What’s in your control? Then I write out a few simple things I can do that are actually in my control to feel better, and then do those things. This works every single time, without fail, to help me feel a little better. No matter what’s going on.

What is one mistake you made along the way and what did you learn from it?

​OM: Too many to count, ha! Specifically, though, I think that I thought graduating college, moving to New York by myself, and starting a new (and my first ever) job would be a lot easier than it actually was. I’m a very independent person, but adapting to all that sudden, intense change was much more difficult than I was anticipating, so I spent the first few months scrambling to feel settled and confident, and I felt a little bit like a failure — that it wasn’t okay for me to feel so overwhelmed. But sometimes it’s good to feel a little shaken up, I think. You get through it. I wish I would have realized that at the time. 

What has been the most surreal moment of your career thus far?

​OM: I covered the red carpet for Glamour’s Women of the Year awards this year as well as attended the event. It was cool to be up close and personal with so many celebrities I admire (Victoria Beckham, Reese Witherspoon, Karlie Kloss, Serena Williams), but I specifically got to talk to Jenna Lyons (creative director of J.Crew) for a bit, and I’ve been a fan of hers for as long as I can remember. I fangirled hard. 

What advice would you give to a college woman with similar aspirations?

​OM: Yes, it’s important to get internships. To push yourself. To try to get better at your craft. To have a brand, or an aesthetic &mdash to figure out what your skills are. But, at the end of the day, jobs will come and go. I think it’s more important to remember the stuff that no one talks about enough: That no one’s life looks like their Instagram page in reality. That it’s okay to be a mess, or to not know exactly what you want to do, or feel totally overwhelmed sometimes. Because tomorrow is a new day, and whatever ways you messed up today are only opportunities to be better and more creative tomorrow. To always say yes to extra guac. And to celebrate every single moment that you feel successful or beautiful or strong or intelligent and to never, ever apologize for it.

 

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The Truth About How Often Women in Their 20s Are Having Sex

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Sex is everywhere. It's written about in songs, discussed in books, and seen in movies. But how much sex are women in their twenties actually having? We had some recent grads weigh in.

1. Personal choice comes into play

Everyone has their own stand on when they want to have sex. Some people wait until they're married or in a committed relationship, while others take a more relaxed approach and are okay with occasional hook-ups. Your own personal choice has a lot to do with how often young women in general are having sex.

"When I was single and out of college, it was very rare because I used the 'I'm not having sex with you unless we're in a relationship' rule to weed out the guys who wouldn't give me the emotional fulfillment I wanted," says Nicole Echeverria, a 2015 graduate of the University of Michigan. "Now I have an amazing boyfriend, and it's probably around three times a week."

Same goes for Rachel Lytle, a graduate from Penn State. "I was single all through college and had less sex than desired," she says. "Sometimes, while single, I went months and months without any action at all because I didn't want to hook up with just anybody."

Remember, it's your choice when you want to start having sex, and how often you do it.

Related: 32 College Students Get Real About Sex on Campus

2. Other aspects of your personal life might take priority

A demanding career, a full course-load, a graduate degree—these are all huge reasons why sex might take a backseat in your life. You simply might not have the time to be intimate with someone. Lauren Paylor, a Duke University graduate who is currently studying at Fordham University School of Law, understands completely. When asked how much sex she thinks women in their twenties are having, Lauren replied, "ZERO. Law school = no time for boys!"

Those who've moved in with their SOs have found that just because you're together day in and day out doesn't necessarily mean there's time for sex.

"Right after graduation, my boyfriend and I moved in with each other," says Erica*, a recent graduate now living in New York City. "I thought the sex would be regular—but after a 10 to 12 hour work day, it's the last thing on your mind. We're trying to make more time for intimacy, but at most, it's once a week."

And it's the same for those who aren't living together.

"After college, the amounts increased with a steady hook-up, but decreased without one," says Rachel. "I would say this had to do with going out less (especially during the week) and 'adulting' more. As of six months ago, I'm in a committed relationship. I usually only get to see my boyfriend on the weekends, and most times we have sex at least once a day [on the weekend], if not more."

3. Birth control plays a role

There are a ton of different birth control options available, and while most young women are acquainted with "the pill," intrauterine devices—or IUDs—are becoming more and more popular. Regardless of your preferred method, nearly all hormonal birth control options come with a list of side effects; potentially having an effect on your libido and how often you actually want to have sex.

"I [have] been on various forms of birth control since I was 16, and just recently switched to an IUD," says Haley C, who chose not to give her last name. "The IUD may not have any exact correlation to my increased sex drive, but for the first time in my life, I feel like I want to have a lot of sex."

4. Women in their twenties are looking to experiment

Experimentation is an important part of a healthy (and fun!) sex life, and your twenties are a great time to figure out who you are as a sexual being. Experimenting in the bedroom also helps you figure out what you like and what you don't like.

"While I will continue to be very smart and safe in the bedroom, I want to spend my twenties figuring out what I like and what I want from a sexual partner," says Haley. "My sex life the past six months has been exponentially more satisfying than my sex life in the last six years. Not because of the quantity of partners, but because of the quality of sex."

Related: Take Her Campus's Sex Survey!

5. Intercourse isn't the only form of intimacy in a relationship

There are other ways to satisfy your sexual cravings without having intercourse! Oral sex can be way more than just foreplayit can become the main event!

"I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost two years," says Sophie van Bastelaer, a student at McGill University. "If we're talking actual sex, I'd probably tally us at once every two weeks, but if we're talking sexual acts, that's closer to once or twice a week. I couldn't tell you exactly what the reasoning behind it is beyond the fact that we're both so busy and so tired all the time."

Whether you're having sex once a week, once a month, or not at all, Sophie reminds us of one important thing: "amount of sex doesn't determine a relationship's value." Agreed!

*Name has been changed.

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